by Kaylee Ryan
“Hey, you okay?” he asks when I climb back in bed. He reaches for me and pulls me close.
“Yeah, just washed my makeup off.”
“And brushed your teeth,” he says with a lazy smile.
“Yeah, I… uh, just used my finger.”
“You still want to sleep?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” He pulls me into him, and I snuggle into his chest. Let his warmth soak into me.
“It’s an icebox in here.”
His laughter rumbles in his chest. “When you work outside in the heat all day, it’s nice to be able to come home and cool off.”
“I’ll have to bring some winter pajamas and socks next time,” I say, and immediately regret it. It’s hard to remember he’s not mine when it feels like I am wrapped in his arms.
“I’ll make sure I remind you.”
Wait. What?
“You want some socks?”
“No,” I say, placing my feet between his jean-clad legs. “I’ll just use you.” I can’t help but think it would be even warmer if we were skin to skin.
“I’m all yours,” he says, squeezing my hip gently.
I know what he means, but that doesn’t keep my heart from skipping a beat. I want nothing more for him to be mine and me to be his. Some women may not like that whole ownership thing, but the label outside the controlling is something I crave. I think about Ridge and Kendall and what they have, their growing family, and I want that. I want that so much. I also want Tyler. It’s messy and complicated, and I don’t know how to get there without risking life-long friendships, or the new one we seem to have created the past year or so.
“You’re not sleeping,” he says.
“How do you know?”
“I can practically hear you thinking.” He pauses. “Nothing happened. You asked me to hold you, so I did. That’s it.”
“The thought never crossed my mind. I know I can trust you. That I’m safe with you. I’m sorry about last night.” I cringe as memories come back to me. I hate that he had to take care of me, but if I’m honest, I’m glad it was him.
“Why? I’m not. Best night of sleep I’ve had in years.”
“Really?” I lift my head from his chest to look at him. His bright blue eyes are already watching me.
“Really.” He runs his index finger down my cheek. “So don’t worry that pretty little head of yours. All right?”
I nod. Words are escaping me at the moment. What does all this mean? Does it mean anything? “Can I tell you something?”
“Anything.” He nods.
“I’m awake, not getting back to sleep, but I wasn’t ready to leave this—” I avert my gaze to the wall over his shoulder.
“Hey.” With his index finger under my chin, he guides me to look at him. “We can stay here all day,” he assures me.
“I’m sure you have things to do.”
“Nothing that can’t be put on the back burner.”
“No, I can’t let you do that.” I’m out of bed and on my feet before he can stop me.
“Reagan.”
I don’t turn to look at him. Instead, I spy my shoes, bending to pick them up. “I should get going. Let you get your work done.”
“Reagan.” This time his voice is louder. More commanding.
I stop in my tracks and turn to face him. “What just happened?”
“I-I don’t know. No, that’s not true. I do know. You’re sweet and warm, and I could easily forget that you’re not mine. That you’re my brother’s best friend. Hell, you’re my best friend too. I can feel the lines starting to blur, and I know that’s on me, so I should go,” I rush to say.
Before I know what’s happening, he’s out of bed and standing before me. “What if you were mine? What if I was more than just your brother’s best friend, more than just your best friend?”
“You don’t know what you’re asking.” I can’t believe I still spilled my guts to him. I’ve made this more awkward, and I just want to go home. Disappear and pretend I didn’t just humiliate myself in front of him.
He cups my face with his callused hands. “I know exactly what I’m asking. What if you were mine?” he repeats. His eyes are an intense storm of blue as he watches me. Waiting for me to answer him.
“I’m not,” I whisper.
He swallows thickly and opens his mouth to reply, but a ringing cell phone cuts him off. He curses but doesn’t look away or drop his hold on me. So I do it for him. I take two steps back, out of his reach.
“You better get that.” I assume it’s his because I have no idea where mine is.
“Reagan,” he pleads.
“I’m just going to go call Dawn to come and pick me up.”
“No.” He clasps his hands behind his head and exhales a deep breath. “I’ll take you home. Give me a minute.”
I nod. I don’t want to fight with him. I just need time to get my shit together. I’ve made a mess of things by opening my big mouth, and I don’t know how to fix it. Fear takes hold when I think about losing him. I can’t imagine life without him in it. And Ridge, what is he going to say when he finds out I’ve placed an invisible wedge between myself and one of his best friends? How do I pretend like he doesn’t know I want him? And how do I not think about anything other than his question? “What if you were mine?”
“Hello.” I hear him answer, and I rush out of his room, giving him privacy and us both some space to breathe.
He finds me in his living room a few minutes later. “Hey, that was my mom. She invited me over for breakfast.”
“That’s sweet of her.” I pull my phone out of my purse that I found by the front door. “I’ll call Dawn to come and get me, so you can go.”
“I want you to come with me.”
“What?”
“Why not?” He shrugs. “My parents love you.”
“Won’t they ask questions? How will we explain why I’m with you so early on a Saturday morning? Looking like this.” I look down at my rumpled clothes.
“They don’t need an explanation, and they won’t ask for one.”
“Thank you, but I think I should pass this time.”
“Then you and I can go to breakfast.”
“That’s not a good idea.”
“I’ll make up something here,” he offers.
“Ty.” I pause, gathering my thoughts.
“What are your plans for today?” he asks before I can turn him down again.
“Nothing much. Kendall and I are taking Knox to the park this afternoon.”
“And tonight?”
“Nothing much.”
“Movie night?” he asks hopefully.
We’ve had a few of those over the past year, and even though I wanted more, I never let on. Now, things have changed. As of a few minutes ago, he knows I want him. I’m not sure how to act now. Glancing at him, I take him in. He’s standing rigid, arms crossed over his chest, waiting for an answer. It’s as if he knows I’m going to say no. Steeling my resolve, I give myself a mental pep talk. I can do this. I can be friends with him. I can pretend nothing has changed. I don’t want to lose him.
“Yeah, movie night,” I agree, and shock registers across his face.
He nods slowly. “Good. Six o’clock?”
“I’ll be here. What should I bring?”
“Nothing. I’ve got it covered.”
“That’s not how we do this. I bring food or drinks. Something,” I remind him.
“Yeah, but this time, I’ve got it.” He pulls his keys out of his pocket and nods toward the door. “I guess you want to go home?”
“I do. Thank you for the invite, but… I need a shower.”
He opens his mouth; I’m sure to say I can shower here, or that he can wait on me at my place, that’s just the kind of guy he is. Instead, he closes it and nods. “I’ll take you home then.” With his hand on the small of my back, he leads me out to his truck.
The drive to my place is quiet, and as he pulls his truck
in behind the shop, I find myself searching for something to say. Anything that can stall him leaving, extending our time together.
“Have fun at the park,” he says, parking his truck in behind my car.
“Thank you. Knox loves it.”
He smiles. “Yeah, he’s a ball of energy that one.”
“I know. I don’t know if they’re ready for two under two.”
“They’ve got lots of sitters, so I’m sure they’ll be fine.”
I smile at that. We are one big group. We’re also more than just friends; we’re family. That’s what makes this… attraction I have for him so difficult. “They do. Okay, well, I guess I’ll see you later?”
“Definitely.” He shuts off his truck and climbs out. I watch as he walks in front and to my door, pulling it open.
“What are you doing?”
“Walking you to your door.”
“Tyler, it’s right there.” I point to the steps that lead to the outside entrance of my apartment.
“I’m walking you to your door,” he says again, leaving zero room for negotiation. He offers me his hand and helps me from the truck.
“This is silly,” I say as he leads me to the stairs with his hand on the small of my back.
He stops once we reach the bottom step, turning me to face him. “It’s not silly. It’s me treating you how you should be treated. It’s me looking out for you.” He pauses, and his blue eyes flash with something I can’t name before it’s gone. “This is me showing you what it’s like to be mine.” He pauses, letting his words sink in. “Now, let’s get you upstairs,” he says.
I nod and turn away from him. On unsteady legs, I take each step one at a time until I reach my door. “I’ll see you soon.” His hot breath brushes across my ear.
I punch in my code and push open the door. I turn to face him once I’ve stepped inside. “See you soon,” I whisper. He winks and jogs back down the steps and to his truck. I stand here until I can no longer see him before shutting myself inside, resting my back against the door.
Something is shifting between us. I don’t know how to feel about it. I’m excited because I want more with him. I’m scared of what happens if we try this and it doesn’t work out. I’m nervous about tonight, and most of all, I’m happy at the prospect of us being more. So many conflicting emotions whirl through me. I can’t pinpoint which is stronger. Shaking out of my thoughts, I head to the shower so I can grab something to eat and make his favorite buffalo chicken dip for tonight. My phone beeps as I turn on the water in the shower.
* * *
Kendall: We still on for this afternoon?
* * *
Her text is followed by a picture of Knox and Ridge sleeping on the couch. My heart swells for my big brother.
* * *
Me: Yes.
* * *
I toss my phone on the counter and strip out of my clothes before stepping into the shower. Only nine more hours until I see him again.
Chapter 6
Tyler
* * *
After breakfast with my parents, I stop at the store and pick up Reagan’s favorite chips and that Ranch dip she loves. I throw in some popcorn, a twelve-pack of beer, and some other items I know she likes. I want to be prepared. Once I have all her favorites, I go ahead and grab my groceries for the week. I toss in a box of pancake mix in case she stays again. I want to be able to make her breakfast. I’m not much of a cook, but adding water to pancake mix I can handle.
Once I’m back at my condo, I unpack all the groceries, and head to the shower. I wait until the bathroom is filled with steam before stepping under the hot spray. Bracing my arms on the shower wall, I tilt my head, letting the water beat down on me. My mind wanders to Reagan and how it felt to hold her in my arms last night. The feel of her body pressed against mine. Her hot breath against my neck. My cock thickens just thinking about it. About her.
Before I can think better of it, I’m reaching for my cock, fisting it in my hand. I give it one long, hard stroke, and a shudder tears through me. I remember what it felt like to have her ass nestled against my length. I would have thought it impossible, but I grow even harder.
Another long stroke.
Then another.
“Fuck,” I pant. Reaching for the body wash, I fill the palm of my hand and lather up my cock. This isn’t the first time I’ve taken care of the ache that she caused. However, it’s the first time after knowing what it’s like to lie next to her for hours.
Another long stroke where I circle the tip has me bracing myself with my free hand against the shower wall. I remember her sleepy hazel eyes as they took me in this morning. The way she confessed that she felt more. The feel of her breath against my neck as she fell asleep last night. Every second is a constant movie reel in my mind.
I’m chasing my release, fisting my cock, stroking as if my life depends on it. My legs start to shake and I stroke faster, calling out her name as I come harder than I ever have before. With my cock temporarily satisfied, I force myself to clean up and turn off the water. Keeping it casual, I dress in a T-shirt and some basketball shorts.
Glancing at my phone, I see I still have five more hours before she shows up at my door. I should have offered to pick her up, but that would be too much like a date. A cheap one at that considering we’re just watching movies at my place. Not to mention, that would scare her off. I have a feeling she’s already pushing me away; I don’t need anything else working against me.
I busy myself cleaning the bathroom and doing a few loads of laundry. I need to wash my sheets, but then I’d be washing away the smell of her. That can wait another couple of days. That didn’t take nearly long enough. I still have time to kill. Normally, I’d call one of the guys, see if they want to hit the gym or have a few beers. They know me too well and will see right through me. I’m not ready to tell them that we’re hanging out. They know that we have in the past, but suddenly, it all feels different. Her confession of her wanting more changes everything.
The more I think about it, the more I know I need to talk to Ridge. I need to tell him that I’m falling for her. I didn’t mean for it to happen, I wasn’t looking for her, but that’s our reality. I’ve unexpectedly fallen for my best friend’s little sister. I have to tell him. Speaking of, I know that Reagan and Kendall have Knox at the park. What better time to test the waters. Grabbing my phone, I take a deep breath and dial Ridge.
“Ty, what’s up?” he answers.
“Not much. Just adulting. You?”
“The same actually. Kendall and Reagan took Knox to the park, so I’m picking up the house.”
“Look at you settling in, all domesticated and shit,” I tease.
He chuckles. “Laugh all you want, my friend. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”
“Yeah, you make it look easy.”
“You think?”
“Definitely. How is the family?” I ask.
“You’re acting like it’s been months since we’ve seen each other. It’s barely been twenty-four hours. What gives?”
Shit. Shit. Shit. I was counting on a little small talk. “I wanted to run something by you.”
“Shoot.”
“It’s about Reagan.” I pause, letting that little bit of knowledge sink in.
“What about her? Is she okay?” he asks, concerned.
“Yes. She’s good. Perfect,” I say nervously.
“O-kay,” he says slowly. “You going to tell me what’s going on?” He waits, but I say nothing. “Tyler?” he prompts.
“Look, I’m not sure how to say this, so I’m just putting it out there. How would you feel about me dating your sister?”
“Does she want to date you?”
That is definitely not what I thought he would say. “I think so.”
“You think so?”
“It could be messy, you know, if things don’t work out between us.”
“Messy isn’t good, Ty.”
“I know that,” I say,
frustrated with how this is going. I guess it could be worse. He could be threatening to cut my balls off and kicking my ass.
“I’m going to need a little more information,” he says, and if I’m not mistaken, there is humor in his voice.
“Are you laughing?” I ask him, shocked.
“Maybe,” he says, doing a shit job of hiding his humor.
“Come on, man, I’m being real here. I want to date her. For real date her. You’re one of my best friends. How’s this going to go down?”
“You tell me?”
“Quit fucking with me.”
“She’s for keeps,” he tells me, his tone now serious. “If you aren’t going into this with that as an option, don’t do it.”
“It’s an option,” I confess.
“Then all I can tell you is don’t hurt her. I know there would be some level of hurt and awkwardness, but if you’re ever not feeling it, tell her. Be honest. Reagan is a reasonable girl.”
“That’s it?” I ask him.
“What do you want me to say?”
“I-I don’t know. I guess I didn’t expect you to be this chill about it.”
“You do a shit job of hiding it,” he tells me.
“What?”
He laughs a deep belly laugh. “Both of you are shit at hiding it. I’ll tell her the same thing. Respect each other. If either of you is not feeling it, be honest, be respectful. That’s all I ask.”
“That was easier than I thought it was going to be.”
“It helps that I’ve watched you watching her for the last year. I’ve also noticed you don’t take anyone home anymore, or go home with them either.”
