by Kotru, Umesh
“Thank you father,” said Kunti; “Rest assured that I am alright – but to allay your fears on my account, let me share a secret with you. Before he left, Maharishi Durvasa gave me a mantra which requires me to do penance for one year and have meals only once a day for that period. He assured me that if I follow his instructions correctly that will ensure a very bright future for me as well as for my near and dear ones, besides warding off the influence of bad stars. In fact, I shall be seeing you only occasionally during the said period of the vow. Please don’t feel apprehensive about me, as Dhatri is there to take good care of me. If I need anything I will send word through her.”
On hearing these words King Kuntibhoja felt reassured. He assured Kunti that nobody including himself will disturb her during her penance and gave her his heart-felt blessings. Dhatri was to be the link between her and the rest of the family. Before Kunti left, he sent for Dhatri and ordered her to take good care of her mistress during the period of her penance. She nodded her head, but inwardly was surprised as Kunti had been avoiding her as well. Kunti sensed this confusion in Dhatri’s mind and to prevent her father from suspecting the same, asked her to accompany her to her living quarters. On the way back she was silent but inwardly reproaching herself for having lied to her father for the first time in her life. Under the prevailing circumstances she could not have done anything else, as this was the only option left to her. She had developed this plan of action after careful thought. The other part of the plan was to take Dhatri into confidence. She decided to do the needful the very next day and as a first step, invited Dhatri to her private room for the first time after a long gap. Hence the invitation was a pleasant surprise to her doting companion. As of old, the two friends chatted for a long time before Dhatri left. Following her departure, Kunti was in a cheerful mood after many days and, consequently, had a sound night’s sleep. This cheerfulness was observed by Dhatri as well, when she came over next morning and was again surprised when Kunti extended a warm welcome to her.
They sat down for a chat. Dhatri, being very intelligent and a keen observer, noticed that something was on Kunti’s mind which was constantly disturbing her concentration. She finally said, “Rajkumariji, are you alright? You seem to be distracted.” Kunti was caught off guard and vehemently denied any lack of attention on her part. But her denial lacked any conviction, enabling Dhatri to drive home her point. Kunti had no option but to admit what Dhatri had observed. “You are right, Dhatri,” said Kunti, “I have a very big problem with far-reaching consequences on my hands. During the recent past I have been hiding things from you and even avoiding your company for fear of your queries.”
On hearing these words Dhatri burst into uncontrolled sobbing, which Kunti could not understand. Since she also loved her friend and Dasi dearly, she got up and hugged her while enquiring about the reason behind her emotional outburst. In reply Dhatri said, “The reason for my current behaviour is you, my dear Rajkumariji. Right now I am experiencing a distressing mix of feelings which make me cry. I was under the impression that I must have done something very wrong to deserve the treatment I have been getting from my dear Rajkumariji all these months. I have been cursing myself day in and day out, even losing my sleep, but could not find the reason for this indifference. But now, on hearing your words, I am all the more hurt and crestfallen. God knows that I have always served you faithfully without any self interest and to the best of my ability. It now transpires that you never considered me worthy of your trust and confidence. Otherwise you would not have held back things from me.”
After uttering these words she went into another bout of sobs. Kunti begged for forgiveness and consoled her with soothing words. She said, “Dhatri, I am sure after listening to what I am going to reveal, you will understand the reasons for my recent behaviour towards you in particular and towards my family in general.” She continued, “Do you remember the day when, on entering this room, you commented on my looking gorgeous and noticed some wonderful fragrance in the room?” “How can I forget that day,” replied Dhatri, “because it was the day when you started moving away from me and avoiding my company. In my simple rustic brain I concluded that my comments must have angered you so much to bring out such a drastic reaction from you.” “No Dhatri,” said Kunti, “you have done no wrong and are as dear to me as before. Now give your full attention to what I am going to tell you. Your comments regarding the authenticity of Maharishi Durvasa’s mantra still ring in my ears. I wish I had believed your word and the chapter would have been closed there and then. What baffled me was the assertion that even Devatas were susceptible to the Maharishi’s mantra. To my doubting mind, that strange assertion cried out for testing and validation. May be, as pointed out by Maharishi Durvasa himself, destiny had a role to play in whatever is happening to me.”
Dhatri opened her mouth to say something, but Kunti gestured her to remain silent. She continued, “My mental turmoil continued and as you have observed. I used to spend most of my time standing by that window and looking at the blue sky against the backdrop of our beautiful garden. My curiosity continued to increase with every passing day, as I was unable to figure out the puzzle. Then one day, as I was watching the sunrise, everything including the sun and all else in the garden looked exceedingly beautiful and enchanting. That was the day which I alluded to you earlier; and that was the day which changed my destiny forever. I don’t know what happened to me that day. Looking back I feel as if some divine force was leading me on, when looking at the Sun-god I invoked the mantra given to me by the blessed Maharishi.”
Dhatri put her hand to her mouth in astonishment but did not say anything. Kunti continued, “Dhatri, I am paying a very heavy price for doubting Maharishi Durvasa’s words and will continue to do so till I live. I even paid no heed to your caution for which I feel ashamed. I shudder to think about the future and its implications for my family and myself”. So saying she rolled on the bed in a fit of sobbing. Dhatri tried her best to console her by saying that one cannot change one’s destiny. But at the same time she was aware of the huge problem they had on their hands. She said, “Rajkumariji, I am sorry that you are undergoing so much agony; but at the same time I am anxious that we have to devise some way to tackle the problem and do that without any further loss of time. I hope you don’t misunderstand me.” On hearing these soothing words, Kunti wiped her tears and got up from the bed. From her expression it was clear to Dhatri that she had already made up her mind regarding the plan to be followed. She now said: “Dhatri, listen carefully. Needless to say, I expect absolute silence and secrecy from you. Sometimes I wonder whether there was some divine inspiration when I lied to my father that Maharishi Durvasa had prescribed a year’s penance to me which requires, among other things, that I should be left alone for the duration of the fast. That is why I mentioned to you the other day that I had mixed feelings on the subject. On the one hand there was great pain on account of having lied, for the first time, to my dear father; but on the other was an equally great relief on being assured absolute privacy for the duration of my confinement and beyond. Fortunately my father has ordered you to serve as the link between me and the family. That solves one problem. But what about the most important problem of all, Dhatri? What do we do about the coming childbirth? How can we keep that a secret from the world at large?”
Dhatri, who was listening patiently to every word of Kunti said, “My dear Rajkumariji, leave that portion of the problem to me. I will find a way out. I will not let you down.” Dhatri’s confidence gave some relief to Kunti, who got up and hugged her tightly and whispered in her ear, “I shall never be able to repay this debt of yours in this lifetime.” With these words she again burst into tears of remorse and Dhatri had to console her again.
After some months one early morning, when most of the household was still asleep, Dhatri came to Kunti’s room and sought her permission to leave the palace for a day. Kunti was surprised and said, “Dhatri, what is the matter? Is everything alright?�
� To this query Dhatri replied, “My dearest Rajkumariji, you seem to have forgotten that very soon we will need the assistance of a good midwife.” On hearing these words, Kunti went pale and gasped for breath. She went into another fit of sobbing and Dhatri had to reassure her that everything will turn out well in the end. “But Dhatri,” said Kunti, “The midwife whom you contact in your village will surely gossip around and spread the word which, in turn, shall soon reach the palace. My dear father is sure to know before long and this news will devastate him besides undermining his position in the community of kings in whole of Bharatavarsha. I would rather commit suicide than bring disgrace to my family. That will be a befitting punishment for the sin I have committed.”
Now it was the turn of Dhatri to cry. After regaining her composure to some extent, she warned Kunti not to even think about such a step as she had to take care of not one but two lives. She continued, “Rajkumariji, who told you that I am going to my own village in search of a midwife? After giving careful thought to the whole problem, I have decided to go to an obscure village very far from the palace and bring back the midwife as my visiting sister and lodge her in the room adjacent to mine. Her family will be paid handsomely for her absence. The reward coupled with a mild warning is sure to buy her and her family’s silence. The reason for my bringing her in immediately is to avoid raised eyebrows in the palace. If she is summoned at the last minute everybody is sure to ask questions.” On hearing these pleasing words, Kunti’s expression underwent a drastic change and reflected a mixture of relief and gratitude. She thanked Dhatri profusely and gave her permission to leave forthwith. Nobody noticed her absence as it was still early in the morning when she left. Kunti spent a tense day in her room. When it was quite dark she was aroused by a soft knock on her door and in came Dhatri along with a woman of around forty years, who prostrated before the princess. After preliminary introductions, the two women left and Kunti was again alone. At that moment her respect for Dhatri increased manifold. For the next one and a half months she saw the midwife on a couple of occasions. As far as Dhatri was concerned, she was at her service day and night till one day early morning she developed labour pains. Dhatri managed everything with clockwork precision till Kunti gave birth to a radiantly beautiful male baby almost coinciding with the sunrise outside. It seemed to all the three women in the room as if the sun was rising to welcome the newborn.
Chapter-2
Kunti’s Dilemma
That morning as the sunlight flooded the room, it seemed that the same had illumined the souls of the three women as well. It was evident from the radiance emanating from their faces. All three forgot that the event that had taken place in the room a while ago was not a normal event but fraught with possibly grave repercussions for Kunti. It was the midwife who first noticed the divine beauty of the new born child whose appearance was as brilliant as the Sun himself and was adorned with natural armour and earrings which were part of his body. She said, “Rajkumariji, I have assisted in the birth of so many babies in my life but never have I beheld such beauty in a newborn child. The armour and earrings this child is born with make him look like a God.” On hearing these words, Kunti immediately picked up the baby and held him close to her bosom. She placed a scarf over his head as if to protect him from evil eyes.
In this way all the three women were marvelling at the extraordinary turn of events witnessed by them, without noticing the passage of time. Sun rays which had illumined the room in the morning had left long back as it was approaching noon. Dhatri, as usual, was the first to recover her composure and sought Kunti’s permission to escort the midwife to her room so that she could pack her things and prepare herself for the long journey back to her home. While giving the necessary permission, Dhatri noticed that Kunti was already fully engrossed in maternal ministrations and did not even notice the two women leaving the room. She immediately realised that the more the child remained with Kunti the more difficult it would be for her to part with it. She became worried, but being a practical woman she knew that the first task was to get rid of the midwife before taking any further action in the matter.
On reaching her room she gave lot of money and clothes to the midwife and asked her to pack her belongings and be ready for departure by the nightfall. A trusted boatman had been asked to wait with his boat on the bank of the river Ashwa. After giving these instructions, she hurried towards the room of the princess who, as expected, did not notice her entry at all. She was busy with her baby and did not ask any question regarding the midwife. After a while, Dhatri broached the subject herself. She said, “Rajkumariji, you do not seem to be interested in knowing how I plan to send the midwife back to her village without raising any suspicion.” This brought Kunti back from her reverie to harsh reality, as she realised that everything connected with the birth of her child had to be kept a closely guarded secret.
For the first time that day she lost her cheerful expression and became worried. “Dhatri,” she said, “Please forgive me for my indifference. I do not know what happened to me. I totally forgot that I am not a legally married woman but an unwed mother. With these words, she started crying loudly and Dhatri had to console her as she had done on numerous previous occasions.” She continued, “Where is the midwife? What have you planned for her? How will she go back and, above all, will she keep everything secret?” “Not so many questions at the same time, Rajkumariji,” replied Dhatri. “She is presently lodged in the room where she has been living since her arrival. I have instructed her to pack her belongings and be ready to leave at nightfall. She has been handsomely compensated for her services and looks quite happy about it. To ensure that she does not indulge in idle gossip en-route, I will personally accompany her. I have also employed the services of a trusted boatman to ferry us across the river; and after reaching the other bank, I have decided to follow a longer route to her village to ensure that as few people as possible see us. I shall be back at your service, Rajkumariji, by next morning.”
Kunti was highly impressed and said, “Dhatri, as always you have taken every detail into consideration to ensure that the job is well done. I shall remain eternally grateful for everything you have done for me.” Visibly blushing and embarrassed at her Princess’s words Dhatri said, “Rajkumariji, whatever I am doing is nothing in comparison to the love and compassion you have been bestowing on me all these years. I owe everything to your grace and patronage. Otherwise an ordinary Dasi would not have dared to address her princess in the manner I do.” Kunti cut her short and said, “Don’t you ever mention the word Dasi to me. God knows I have always regarded you as my dear friend or even as a sister. Now go and take the midwife to her village and come back to me by the next morning. Let the Lord Mahadeva be with you all the way.” While leaving, Dhatri begged for forgiveness for whatever she had said and both women hugged each other in a tight embrace of mutual empathy.
When Dhatri returned early next morning she expected her mistress to be a picture of dejection and melancholy, because they had yet to figure out the future of her newborn son. But to her total surprise, she found her mistress immersed in motherhood and in a very jovial mood. She even enquired about the safe passage of the midwife to her village in a very casual manner, in contrast to yesterday when she was worried to death with apprehension – a mood-swing that astonished Dhatri all the more. Thinking about the whole situation, particularly when she noticed the most beautiful baby she had ever seen in her whole life staring at her with an equally beautiful smile on his angelic face, tore Dhatri’s heart apart. She decided to keep quiet for the time being and let her mistress enjoy the serene bliss of motherhood for some more time before bringing her back to the real world from which she seemed to have taken a temporary exit.
Dhatri went about her daily chores in Kunti’s quarters while maintaining casual conversation with her, hoping that her mistress will herself touch upon the issue which was uppermost on her maid’s mind. Instead she found her discussing things only concerning her son, obl
ivious to the circumstances under which he was born. “Look Dhatri,” said Kunti, “how beautiful the smile of my baby is! Do you see his lotus shaped eyes and the expression in them? I forgot to tell you one thing. He does not cry continuously like other kids of his age. He gave me absolutely no trouble in your absence.” Seeing Dhatri’s lack of response and expressionless face, Kunti got angry and said, “don’t you believe in what I have been saying about my child, or is it simply lack of manners on your part? I have never seen you behave so indifferently to anything I have said to you in the past.” Burning with indignation, she continued in the same vein: “Are you jealous or what? Speak up or I will throw you out of this room.” Stung by these very harsh words from her mistress, Dhatri burst out sobbing and said, “Rajkumariji, I am sorry for having hurt your feelings by my silence. I did not know that you had decided to keep your baby irrespective of all the attendant consequences.” So saying she bowed low before Kunti and prepared to leave the room.
Her last words referring to the consequences brought Kunti back to reality. It was now her turn to sob and clutch Dhatri for support. “I don’t know what happened to me, Dhatri,” said Kunti, “please forgive me. I curse myself for being so ungrateful and selfish. You have been by my side like a shadow all these months and, look at me; this is how I have paid you back. The service I rendered to Maharishi Durvasa pales into insignificance in comparison to what you have done for me. With folded hands I seek your forgiveness. Please don’t leave my side. I cannot survive without your support and presence by my side.” “How can I leave when you need me, your humble servant, the most,” said Dhatri, “God only knows what is going through my mind at the horrible thought that the events of last few months need a closure. My heart bleeds from within and I am unable to express my feelings in words.” “What do you mean by this word ‘closure’,” said a visibly trembling Kunti, “what needs a closure?” “My dear Rajkumariji”, replied Dhatri, “Both of us know what I mean by closure. Forgive me if I remind you that no problem can be solved by pretending that the same does not exist.” Almost simultaneously both women turned their heads in the direction where the new born child was lying in a cot and staring at them, as if he was aware of the discussion about his future going on in the room. That expression on his beautiful face was sufficient to cause a deep emotional response in the two women in characteristically different ways.
