“You really need to let me kill something for you,” Michiko said. “The alternative is worse.”
Pulling the conversation back to himself, Khorde said, “I’m not giving back the heart. It’s the first gift my daughter ever gave me. I think I’m going to take it home and nail it to my ice box.”
Cassie snorted. “That won’t make you father of the year.”
Tension and murder crackled in the air like static. I looked up. Clouds were forming; a swirl of charcoal, brightening in places where lightning pulsed, fluttering in and out of hiding. Michiko’s work. Against that backdrop, military helicopters were swooping low, descending toward the mansion. That meant that very soon, my shadow man entourage would be handing over guard duty, and be on the way to me. That was bound to add chaos to what was going on. All I needed was for Fenn and Sanchez to come blundering into things, riding Tukka like a pony.
Onyx returned, a shadow rearing between the demon and me. The shadow prince took on his human form, his back turned to me. He called to me over his shoulder. “It’s done.”
For a moment, I melted inside in relief. We’d saved the world—or at least Texas, which amounted to the same thing for me. I’d grown fond of the Lone Star State despite all the trouble I’d found since moving here. I could just go, and let everybody here work things out without me. Only I couldn’t. I touched the marks burned into my arm. I couldn’t let the demon have any claim on me. That would be buying into all kinds of trouble down the road.
I drew a deep, bracing breath, leaned out sideways and waved. “Hey, Wocky?”
He finished eyeing Onyx, looking past him to me. He seemed to have himself under better control, smiling with beguiling charm. His head canted. “Yes, my dear?”
I heard a soft growl from Cassie at how he addressed me.
“I’ll get your heart back, but I need a few things from you.” The deer-scare clacked, punctuating my words.
“Bargaining with what is not yours,” the demon said. “You learn fast.” He straightened from his menacing crouch, wings shuffling shut against his back, and crossed his arms in a copy of Michiko’s pose. “What do you want?”
“First, you have to give up on staying in the human world. It’s not your place,” I said. “Things are complicated enough here.”
His smiled widened. “How nice of you to remind me of my place. I was so wondering just where that might be.”
I threw his earlier words back at him, but turned around. “Your place is prostrate at my feet, begging to service my every whim.”
He grounded out his next words, “Anything else?”
“Yeah, take this stupid brand off my arm.”
His eyes lit with unholy joy, the air in front of his face hazing even more. “The demon mark, yesssss. I had momentarily forgotten about that.”
Standing there, I had a very bad feeling that a lot of pain was coming my way.
THIRTY-SIX
TAGLIO: cut.
My thoughts took a flight of fancy, and it seemed like the ghost realm held its breath, absorbing our little drama with an electric intensity that boded ill. With everyone standing around, I felt like I had wandered into an outdoor theater production, with cool special effects. Though dimmer now, my orange haze still burned with the extra energy Fenn had given me, making Cassie’s glow pale by comparison.
Black flame rippled over the smirking demon, not true aura, not anything natural, not anything I wanted to touch with a ten-foot pole.
Also lacking aura, Onyx looked the same as he did on my side of the veil.
And with a presence that clawed at my attention like a demanding cat, Khorde towered beyond the demon, as if guarding the deer-scare and pool.
I was really starting to hate the drawn-out rhythm of its eternal thunk!
Facing the demon, Onyx said, “What demon mark?”
The demon shuddered, laughed, and smiled impossibly wide. “This demon mark.”
Pain hit like a meteor strike, hammering me to my knees. I folded into a ball, blind with agony that wouldn’t let me breathe. Burning from the inside out, my arm was on fire, sending daggers into my brain. Eons passed. I hovered on the edge of lightheaded collapse, but couldn’t find the peace of unconsciousness.
The pain broke, shards of nightmare fading away after sawing me apart. I could breathe, but nothing else, knotted up with someone holding me. A wimpy mewling sound filled my ears.
So annoying… Oh, right, that’s me.
I stopped.
“Grace! Grace!” Cassie’s face was a pale blur until I brought it into focus.
I struggled weakly to see what was causing all the violent thudding I was hearing. She shifted me so I could see better. A black flicker of shadow dancing around the demon, Onyx pounded away. Elusive as a fistful of air, the shadow man always seemed a step beyond the demon’s slow response. Wocky was driven to wrapping his wings around himself as a protective buffer. Still, as the fight spun them around, Onyx found openings for his fists.
The demon’s smile was gone.
I was thankful for the diversion that had ended my suffering.
“You wouldn’t think a fist of shadow could hurt a demon,” I mused aloud.
“Look at the demon’s black flame,” Cassie said. “Each blow Onyx lands sucks up energy like a sponge. He’s draining whatever that stuff is that passes for a demon’s life force.”
Without warning, the demon snapped his wings wide, staggering off balance.
Battered away, Onyx landed at Khorde’s feet.
Expressionless, Khorde observed him. “You come close to impressing me.”
Onyx met my father’s gaze. “I suppose that means I need to try harder.” He collapsed to shadow, flowed into a vertical column, and shifted to human form once more, turning toward the demon, then tilting his head back.
The demon was in the air, bobbing fifteen feet up, probably feeling safe.
His eyes tracked me down.
I protested, “No, don’t!”
“Then you need to do something to make me happy.”
With Cassie’s help, I managed to stand. It was a start. I knew what the demon wanted. His heart. The miko had used it on him like a demon mark. He was unwilling to be that vulnerable again. I could sympathize.
I looked to Khorde. “Give him back his heart.”
A hint of sadness came to his face, like a mirage, there and gone. “I can’t do that. I need leverage in case he attempts to breach the barriers of the ghost realm. I owe it to all the ghost realms that overlap, and their adjacent worlds. The shrine maiden’s soul is anchored to that heart, making it a key of sorts. A dangerous key.”
“What the hell are you blathering on about?” Cassie asked. “Our daughter needs this.”
The demon gave her a thumb-up. “Way to go, mom.”
She shot him a withering look that failed to wither.
Khorde said, “The soul-linked heart will let him open gates from this ghost realm, and fashion new tears to bind demons to flesh. I have a duty not to let that happen. Shadow men are the guardians of the paths between worlds.”
Cassie hissed, eyes slits of fury. “Heartless bastard.”
“I have a heart,” Khorde said. “You gave it to me, and broke it when you left. Why do you think you can command me now?”
Her eyes widened. “So what? This is payback? You’re hurting me through Grace?”
He ignored the accusation, his eyes on me. “You have lived your whole life as a human. Do you want them hunted as prey by demonkind? Do you want your human friends branded as you are, groveling in submission to things like that?” He pointed at the hovering demon.
I put an edge to my voice, “I’m not groveling, to him or you.”
“I can protect you,” Khorde said. “Your life doesn’t have to be an endless chain of battles. I’ve seen the cards Destiny has drawn for you. They’re not pretty.”
Cassie’s breath caught. She forced her words, “You’ve been to see Her?”
&nbs
p; He looked at Cassie, slow to answer. Finally, “Yes.”
“Who the hell is her?” I asked.
“Who the hell cares?” the demon yelled from above. “It’s all about me, remember?”
Khorde extended his right hand, curling his fingers on emptiness. A sword made from shadow flickered into existence in his grip. I wondered why he didn’t just draw the overgrown meat cleaver strapped to his back. Instead, he pointed the shadow sword up at the demon. “You weary me.”
The demon pumped his wings furiously as if he knew something bad was coming. He didn’t get far. Khorde’s shadow sword lengthened, spearing into the demon, popping out of his back between the shoulder blades. Wocky screeched and clawed. His hands ghosted through the smudgy shaft, unable to touch it.
“That’s a waste of time,” Onyx said. “This type of demon can’t be killed.”
“Pain is never a waste of time,” Khorde said, “not if it teaches a needed lesson.”
Wocky cursed across several languages, calling us all everything but a child of God.
Unnoticed by the others, I eased over to Michiko who had the storm sword propped up on her ghostly shoulder, taking in the show with a smile. Her head didn’t move, but her eyes slid toward mine as I leaned close to her, whispering, “Are you any good at baseball?”
Her brow wrinkled in confusion. “Maybe.”
I looked at her sword. “So if I throw you a ball, you can definitely cut it in half?”
She grinned. “What are you planning?”
“Just be ready.”
I glided toward Khorde, graceful in the lighter gravity, like a dancer on a stage.
Cassie saw where I was going and reached for me though she wasn’t close enough to stop me. “Grace!”
That got everyone’s attention back to me as I stopped next to Khorde. He looked down into my face, studying it with care. This was the first time we’d ever been within spitting distance, let alone hugging range. Of course, that didn’t mean I wasn’t totally ticked off at him thinking he could waltz into my just-fine-without-you life, playing puppet master, plastering his shadow man muscle all over me so I was tripping over them every time I turned around. And then there was Onyx, the suitor dear old dad had hand picked for me, as if these were the dark ages. The big scary jerk!
I drew a deep breath, and released it slowly. He had no scent. What the hell is that about?
I shot him my best you’re-not-the-boss-of-me glare, hardening my voice, “Give me the heart.”
“On my terms,” he said.
I held myself ready but loose, with no tension in my muscles to betray my intentions. “So that’s a no.”
“You must find another way to deal with your demon mark.”
“No problem.” I smiled coldly and plunged into him, vanishing as had the demon heart I’d tossed into him earlier. Cold black ink seemed to wrap around me, crawling over my skin as I swam ahead, arms fanning the dark. Motion was difficult. The dense shadow of his substance resisted the force I applied. Daggers of ice pierced me. The endless night piled on me with crushing force, yet somehow I had no trouble breathing.
A voice filled my head, not Taliesina’s. This was a deep bass texture that thumped through me like chained thunder. What are you doing?
“Finding another way to deal with my demon mark. Since you won’t hand the heart over, I’m going to take it back.”
Think you can?
“I have to. I’m not a bird that can sing in a cage.”
The riches of my kingdom are hardly a cage.
I swam on, straining against a current that tried to roll me back. I spoke past gritted teeth. “A prison with luxuries is still a prison.”
The task you’ve set yourself is beyond your strength. Give up.
“I won’t.”
I could crush you.
I visualized a soda can sinking so deep in the ocean, it crumpled, imploding. “You won’t.”
I won’t? The current became harder, stunning my face like a blow.
“No. You love me.”
You understand that?
“Besides, you’d have Cassie at your throat for the rest of her life, and kitsune live a very long time.”
Fine. Paddle around all you want. When you’ve exhausted yourself, you may be willing to see reason.
“As defined by you? I think not.”
No other thoughts came. Not his or Taliesina’s. I was encompassed by my father, but also wholly alone. I couldn’t honestly blame Taliesina. This was what I’d asked for. Odd, that I missed her annoying self so much already. She was like background music you ignored until it suddenly went away. If she were here, she’d probably have some good advice on how to find the demon heart. Since she was hiding from me though, I had to find my own answer. Or make one, with not a hell of a lot to work with.
My eyes ached from the pressure. I closed them. Khorde was right about my strength giving out. I felt like I’d finished a marathon and come in last. I was breathing heavily, panting. Oddly, as my movements slowed, the current lessened. It became easier to move. I realized something important; I’ve been fighting myself, not him. Experimenting, I slacked even more, barely trying to move. And the inky sea flowed over me, a fast caress on my skin. This felt like flying.
Edged with approval, his voice returned inside my head, Sometimes what we want comes by surrendering to what we don’t want.
Okay, oh, wise one. I made him an offer, “You can share my life, but you can’t own it.”
That remains to be seen. You have still to find the heart, and there’s an awful lot of me to search within.
“I never thought it would be easy.”
There was a long pause. I’m truly sorry it has to be this way, but if I weren’t true to duty, I couldn’t be true to love. These are the two concepts I’ve adopted at my core. They are how this aspect of shadow is defined.
“You chose how you are. I just want the same thing. As my father, don’t you have a duty to give me that?”
His sigh went through me like a gentle wave. You’re probably right, but we both know your world—as you know it—is at stake. There are times when every parent must say no.
“Tough love, huh? You know, I think I could learn to love you, or hate you. That’s what you’re really deciding here.”
He fell silent, and I sensed he’d withdrawn, though I could sense very little else in the living murk around me.
Okay Grace, I asked myself, what are you going to do now?
THIRTY-SEVEN
PRISE DE FE: to bind or take the blade.
I’d moved blindly, hoping to get where I needed to be. That wasn’t going to work within Khorde’s endless darkness. I had to give up on everything, seeking deep calmness, settling my heart and mind. I reached for perfect stillness. My breathing slowed, deepening. My eyes were shut, but not clenched. I had to become one with the surrounding darkness. I imagined it to be a thick, second skin I wore, and felt for subtle vibrations, the gentlest hint of sound. I exhaled, and let tension flow out of me.
I am the darkness. I am the darkness. I am…
I wasn’t sure if I felt it, or was deceiving myself with what I wanted, but I thought I picked up a pulse. No, a double pulse. Then silence. A lot of silence. Then another double pulse. Wocky’s heart. With the lightest of effort, I fell towards the faint sound. That’s it—
Khorde’s thought broke into mine, I could just move it, you know.
“Do you always cheat at games?” I asked.
I really can’t let you hand that heart over to the demon.
“I know the threat he poses. It will be all right, if you trust me. You can, you know?”
As I glided through the midnight sea, a long silence fell. The beats I strained for returned, louder. Then the heart was in my hands, giving me a thu-thud in greeting. Having it in my hands gave me the mother of all icky feelings, but a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. I swallowed revulsion and called into the surrounding darkness. “Thank you, for
trusting me.”
It’s not far, or for very long. Just see that I don’t regret it.
“While we’re on the subject of regrets…”
Yes?
“You have a lot of birthdays to make up for. Oh, and one more thing, if you hurt Cassie again, you’ll answer to me.”
His laughter slammed into me, a tide that dragged me backwards, end over end.
Daylight, pale and gray in the ghost realm, caught me at the end of the ride as Khorde’s endless shadow spit me out. Falling to the ground, I spun to get my feet under me. I bled aura into the dying grass so I wouldn’t sink through, and scanned the area. Everyone was watching me. Especially the demon, seeing his heart in my hands. Cassie and Onyx stepped my way.
I shook my head, No!
They stopped as I hoped, keeping the field clear for what I had to do.
Khorde let his dark smudge of a sword thin away like smoke.
Wocky dropped in the weak gravity, fluttering his wings a few times to right himself and land on clawed feet. He eased toward me, murmuring soothingly like I was a small, wild animal he didn’t want to spook. “You’re doing the right thing, Grace. It will all be okay. You’ll see.”
“Yeah, I know.”
I lobbed the heart at Michiko like an overgrown softball.
She swung her sword—the storm god’s sword—and cleanly sliced the heart in two.
Wocky screeched in outrage.
Ghost girl faded out with a smile of contentment.
The translucent form of the miko’s soul faded in, as if a tag team switch had been made. She stood over the heart halves which were long overdue a beat. They lay still. Silent. Maybe forever.
Wocky crumbled to his knees. His hands clutched the ground. His eyes were wide, the red fire dimming. A weird gurgle hovered in his throat, then trickled off. He slumped face first to the ground, a shudder writhing his back as his wings spasmed, stiffened, then seemed to melt over him like black tar.
I looked at my arm, where the demon marks had been. The skin was pale and clean. No sign of any brand. One small mercy.
Tears and Shadow (kitsune series) Page 27
