by Sara Alva
Her drooping lids popped open a few times, like she was checking to make sure I was still there. But eventually she gave in, drifting off to sleep with her lips parted slightly and a bit of drool making its way onto the pillow.
Tiny fingernails—painted pink—rested on my arm. I gently moved them to the side so I could scoot back in an attempt to make myself comfortable on the thin cushion.
Reality was a bitch. The excitement of being home was steadily seeping away. Seeing Mimi again meant more to me than I’d probably admit, but I couldn’t deny the fact I’d traded my bedroom in a mansion for a mattress on the floor of a dingy apartment. I couldn’t hide from the truth of what my sister did for a living. And I couldn’t forget that my life had dead-ended. Without a high school degree, I’d be destined for a career in manual labor—or dealing.
Star squirmed, making a cute little noise, and I glanced over at her.
She was a really pretty kid, with Mimi’s straight nose and a fair complexion. Still so innocent, she looked perfectly happy sleeping on the dirty floor. What kind of life would she have, I wondered?
No father, a mother who…did what she did, and an uncle who was a high school dropout. Did she even stand a chance?
I slid my finger into her little hand, and she squeezed down.
“Don’t be like us,” I whispered in her ear.
Chapter 15: Rescue
“Tío!” Tiny hands shook me awake. “Tío, I’m itchy!”
I blinked wearily, fighting off sleep as I attempted to focus on the room.
“What?”
“I’m itchy,” Star repeated. She was standing above me, still clad in the Barbie underwear, her leg directly in front of my face. “See? I got bumps.”
My eyes adjusted. “Shit,” I mumbled.
Her thigh was covered with tiny raised spots—some old and scratched into scabs, others fresh. I quickly looked over my own body and found five bumps along my left arm.
“Fucking bedbugs.”
Star didn’t jump on me for my cussing. I had a feeling she heard that kind of language a lot.
“Bugs in my bed?” she asked, tiny nose curling up. “Ew!”
“Yeah. Ew,” I agreed, untangling myself from the sheets. “You got any cream to put on the itchy bumps?”
She shook her head. “Mommy washed the sheets and she said that would make me stop being itchy.”
I rolled my eyes. “We’ll have to tell her the bugs are in the mattress.”
She really should’ve known that, but I supposed she had a lot on her mind.
I brought Star with me to the bathroom and did a search of the medicine cabinet. There was actually a decent amount of first-aid stuff, but no anti-itch cream. Eventually I wet a wad of toilet paper and dabbed it along her legs.
“Now, don’t touch the bumps. Just blow on them.”
“Blow on them?”
“Yeah, like this.” I made my lips into an O and gently released a breath against her skin.
“Oh!” she nodded. “That feels cold.” Then she eagerly pulled off her shirt. “I have some bumps here, too.”
I blushed. She was only five years old, and there was certainly nothing womanly going on yet, but I still felt strange about her being mostly naked with me in the little bathroom.
In a few seconds I got over it, though. I wet her down some more, blowing on spots here and there. I could see all of her shoulder blades and even parts of her vertebrae as I worked on her back, and I hoped to God it was just because she was a picky eater.
“I’m hungry, Tío,” she announced.
“Yeah.” I helped her back into her shirt. “Let’s go get something to eat.”
The kitchen was just as gross in the daylight as it had been at night. It really didn’t seem like Mimi. She’d always kept her room tidy, always cleaned the table after we ate. I wondered how she could have changed this much in five years. Maybe it was the Angel guy who caused the mess…or maybe she was just so tired after working nights that she didn’t have the energy to keep a clean home.
“Why don’t we fix things up a little before we eat?” I asked Star. “That’ll make your mommy happy, right?”
She considered for a moment, tapping her fingers on her lips. “Okay. Let’s help Mommy.”
I tied off the trash and threw it outside, then sat Star on the counter next to the sink. “I’ll wash and you dry.” I handed her some paper towels.
She nodded, arms outstretched for her first plate. “This is fun!”
I couldn’t remember if I’d ever thought doing the dishes was fun, but I wasn’t going to argue.
There were some roaches nibbling on leftover bits of food, but they were the small kind and I washed them down the garbage disposal, hoping that would chop them to pieces. I scrubbed all the dishes thoroughly and let Star place them back on the cabinet shelves.
“All done!” she announced as the last mug was put away. “Now can we eat?”
“Sure.” I dried my hands on my pants. “What do you want?”
“Cereal!” She slid down from her perch and grabbed a spoon that had been lying on the other side of the counter. “I want cereal!”
The spoon was too large for her little mouth. And it was burnt. And right behind its former resting place, there was a butane lighter.
“Wait, Star, don’t use that spoon. Let’s use one we just washed.”
“Oh, yeah.” She giggled. “This is Angel’s spoon.”
My heart sank.
I took a box of frosted flakes from a cabinet and poured it into some clean bowls, but when I opened the fridge, I found it nearly empty. Only a few slices of cheese, some bread, and a tomato graced the shelves.
“Sorry, kid. There’s no milk.”
Star stuck out her bottom lip in a pout. “But I want cereal.”
I scratched my head. “Well, you can eat it dry, I guess.”
“Can we go to the store and buy milk?”
“I don’t have any money.”
She hopped around excitedly. “Ooh, I know where Mommy keeps the money!”
Before I could stop her, she scampered down the hallway and disappeared into the other bedroom. A few seconds later, she returned with a sock stuffed full of cash.
“See? Now we have money to buy it.”
Some invisible hand reached into my chest, squeezing down on my lungs and making it hard to draw in a breath.
“Uh, yeah. Okay. But let me have that.” I could barely bring myself to pick out the ten-dollar bill, and I gripped it with just the tips of my fingers, like I might catch a disease by touching it. “You’d better go get dressed.”
“Yay!” Star jumped up and down again as she headed toward her room. “I love you, Tío!”
I was going to have to tell Mimi that girl was way too free with her affection.
Star reappeared wearing the same pink shirt, a purple tutu, and white shoes with heels that were too big on her. “I’m ready! And see, I can put my clothes all by myself.”
“Can you walk in those?” I pointed to her feet.
“Mommy said I could wear tacones.” She faced me stubbornly. “They look pretty.”
“Sure, they look pretty, but what if you were being chased by a…tiger? Could you run in them?”
With one hand on her hip, Star gave me a withering gaze that was just like Mimi’s. “There are no tigers here, silly. They live at the zoo.”
We both erupted in giggles.
It felt really good to laugh. I needed to do a little more of that, and a little less thinking about all the negative shit around me.
There was a knock at the front of the house, and Star climbed onto a chair so she could look out the peephole.
“Mommy!” She flung open the door and launched herself into Mimi’s arms. “Mommy, I have a tío!”
“Yes, you do.” Mimi scooped Star up and propped her on her hip. “You met him before, but you don’t remember.”
“That’s ’cause I was a baby, Mommy. No one remembers stuff from when they w
as a baby.”
“And you still a baby!” Mimi bopped her gently on the nose. She seemed really happy holding her daughter, but there were dark circles under her eyes, and wrinkles and creases on her face I hadn’t ever seen before.
“Me and Tío are going to the store to buy milk,” Star said.
“Is that so.” Mimi looked over at me.
I pointed to Star. “It was her idea.”
Rolling her eyes, Mimi set her daughter down on a chair at the kitchen table. “Have a Pop-Tart, baby.” She grabbed a packet out of a cabinet with a broken door. “Your tío and me have to talk about some stuff right now.”
The moment of truth. My hands grew slick with cold sweat as I sat beside Mimi on her wrecked couch.
“So? What’s the long story? Only make it short, ’cause I’m tired.”
There wasn’t time to fuck around, but I still found myself grasping for words. Mimi kept looking at me expectantly, her lips unevenly smeared with the remains of some shimmering red gloss.
She’d always been hot, even though I’d never wanted to think of my sister that way. But I’d known it, and she’d known it. And the guys had known it, which was how she’d ended up with a kid when she was just a kid herself. But she really didn’t look as pretty anymore. Was she just getting old? Was it because she was so thin that her face didn’t have the same glow?
“Well?”
“Star’s bed has bedbugs,” I said abruptly. “I got bit a few times, and she has bumps all over her.”
“Fuck,” Mimi muttered, shaking her head. “I thought maybe it was just fleas—Angel has a couple pit bulls he brings around here sometimes—so I washed all her sheets and her clothes.”
“Nope. It’s bedbugs. Don’t you remember—we had them that one summer, when we were still living in the projects?”
“Yeah.” She pulled a napkin off the table beside her and wiped the lipstick from her mouth. “Fuck. I’ll have to throw out the mattress. I don’t know where I can get another one.”
I felt guilty about weighing Mimi down with crappy news, but I knew she wouldn’t want Star to suffer. And for some reason, I wasn’t quite ready to share my story—maybe because I was afraid of what a bad reaction would mean for my future.
“So…this is Angel’s place?”
Mimi gave me a wary look. “Angel takes care of the rent and I…pay him back.”
“And does he live here?”
She shrugged. “He stays here sometimes. He was here yesterday. I know we left a mess…” She glanced around the kitchen, her brow furrowing.
“Star and I cleaned up.”
“Oh. Thanks.” Her eyes sank closed, and she rested her head next to a dark brown stain on the back of the couch. I couldn’t really tell what color the fabric had been originally.
“What’s that burned spoon on the counter over there?”
“Angel used it yesterday.”
“Used it for what?”
Her lids snapped back open, and she narrowed her eyes with that same look Star had given me earlier. “You know for what. For crack.”
I picked at one of the tiny welts on my arm. “And do you use it?”
“No. Not like Angel does.”
“So you do sometimes, then.”
“Jesus Christ, Alex. Is that why you fucking came here? To get all up in my business and judge me?”
“No, no.” I shook my head quickly, spreading my fingers wide to signal I was dropping the subject. “Sorry. I came because…I really need your help.”
“Okay.” She sighed. “So then tell me what happened. Even though I don’t know how I’m gonna be able to help.”
I started at the beginning, with Hector and the shoes. Her expression grew really hard at that part, and she snatched my wrist to examine the scars while she muttered under her breath, “Hijo de puta.” Then I told her how I’d been taken away, straight from school, and all about Ms. Loretta’s. I left out the parts with Seb, though, skipping to the fire and ending up with my escape from Greg and Eleanor’s house.
When I was done, Mimi waited a full five seconds before smacking me on my head.
“Are you fucking crazy?” she cried. “Why would you leave a fucking mansion?”
“It’s not like they was gonna adopt me!” I shouted back. “They didn’t even want me! They wanted a little kid!”
“Go get your shit!” She stood and marched into the kitchen, where she grabbed some keys out of a drawer. “I’m gonna take you back there right now, and you just better pray they forgive you!”
“What the fuck, Mimi. I came to you for help! I’m not going back!”
Star had finished her Pop-Tarts, and she glanced up at us worriedly as she licked the crumbs from her fingers. “Is Tío in trouble?”
“Go get dressed, baby. I’m gonna leave you with the neighbor ’cause I gotta go somewhere. And yes, Tío is in trouble.”
“But I am dressed!” Star protested.
“Mimi, listen to me—”
“No te creo,” Mimi went on, pulling at her hair violently as she stuffed it into a ponytail. “I don’t believe you. You have a fucking chance to get out of here, and you run away. Jesus Christ, Alex.”
“Mimi!”
She finally stopped her angry movements, placing her hands on her hips as she stared me down. “What? What is it?”
“I wasn’t finished,” I ground out, teeth clenched. “Will you please sit down and let me finish?”
She kept glaring for a few seconds before she flopped back on the couch. “Fine. Finish. But you best make it good.”
“Can we go to the store and get milk now?” Star interrupted. “I’m still hungry.”
“Go play in your room, baby,” Mimi ordered. I supposed it said something for her parenting skills that Star immediately obeyed.
“Okay, listen. When I was at the first house—the group home—I had this friend. And they thought he was the one who started the fire, even though he wasn’t. So he got sent away to this, uh…facility, and he can’t stand it there. He needs my help to get out.”
Mimi rubbed her eyes. “So you ran away for a friend.”
“Yes. I promised him I’d always have his back. And I’m gonna keep my word.”
“That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”
God, I was so sick of relying on other people to get what I wanted. I couldn’t wait till I’d figured out how to take care of shit all on my own…but in this case, I really did need her help.
“Mimi, I owe him.”
“Well, you wanna know what I think? I think you should never owe shit to no one.”
I slammed my fist into the couch, and a puff of dust arose from the impact. “He’s my best friend, and it’s not like I’ve had a fucking shitload of those! You know things haven’t been easy for me since you fucking left!”
“I didn’t leave because I wanted to, asshole!”
“But you did!” My voice cracked, and heat gathered in my face. Weak, pitiful tears would be next if I couldn’t get a handle on myself. “You left, and Hector kept beating up on me, and there was no one there!”
Mimi didn’t deserve this. I knew she didn’t. It wasn’t her fault.
“Alejandro, I didn’t want to leave you alone.” Her tone softened. Old Mimi might’ve cried with me, but this one kept her emotions in check, her expression oddly calm. “I had to do what I had to do.”
I wiped my face with the back of my arm, catching any moisture before it could escape. “He’s the first person I’ve been able to count on in a really long time, okay? And I’m not gonna let him down.” A small part of me knew I was building Seb up to be more than he was—or maybe ever could be—but I couldn’t stop. “So either help me, or get the fuck out of the way, ’cause I’m gonna get him out.”
Moments of silence ticked by while Mimi studied her nails. They were painted pink, like Star’s.
Then she sighed. “I dunno, Alex. What all do you need?”
Hope burst forth in my chest. I
scooted forward on the couch, trying to contain my excitement and probably failing. “I have a plan. But this place is really far away, so I need a car…and a few other things.”
Mimi crossed her arms. “I hope you know what the fuck you’re doing.”
~*~
We parked Mimi’s beat-up Camaro—or Angel’s beat-up Camaro—in the same spot I’d been in with Suzie. It was already eleven in the morning, because Mimi had insisted on showering before we went to the store to get the supplies. I could only pray the Richards hadn’t discovered my absence yet—after all, I could’ve still been sleeping. And if they had, well, hopefully Suzie wouldn’t realize I had the means to get all the way out here again.
I tugged on the sweater I’d used since Ms. Loretta’s, then secured a baseball cap on my head. “Okay. I’m ready. Remember, we gotta make this fast.”
Mimi scowled. “If you get me arrested, I swear I’ll fucking kill you.”
A different lady—an older Latina one—was sitting at the front desk. I walked up to her casually, letting Mimi do the talking.
“We’re here to see a friend,” Mimi said in her most adult voice. I reminded myself that she was an adult now—almost twenty-two.
“Who are you here to visit?” the lady asked.
Shit. No one had asked Suzie any questions, and I wasn’t really prepared for an in-depth interrogation.
“Sebastian,” I answered, since I’d never told Mimi that detail. And all of a sudden, I realized I didn’t even know Seb’s last name. Fuck.
“Oh, yes.” The lady smiled. “That’s nice.”
I guessed Seb was a pretty memorable kid. I’d certainly never be able to forget him.
The lady wrote down Sebastian Smith in her sign-in book, under the Resident’s Name column, then turned it over to Mimi.
“Names and ID, please.”
ID? Jesus fucking Christ. Suzie must’ve been able to skip all this since they knew she was a social worker. What the hell were we going to do now?
“I f-forgot mine,” I stuttered.
The lady seemed undisturbed. “Just hers is okay.”
