by Joy Argento
“Smart-ass.”
“Thank you. I knew my ass was nice, I didn’t know it was smart as well.”
“You do have a nice ass. Remember you still need to baby your back. Now is not the time to start to overdo it. Besides, I want you off your meds so we can go to that straight bar. I’ll have to practice my straight walk, though, so I can pass.”
“You have a straight walk that’s different than your regular walk, which I assume is your gay walk?”
“I do. I’ll show you when we get to the boardwalk.”
“I can hardly wait.”
“You are going to be sooo impressed.”
“Turn left up here. Ignore the signs. I know a shortcut.”
Ali followed Madison’s directions. They led her to a back parking lot behind the boardwalk. “How did you know about this lot? It’s not for the general public.”
“Nope. It’s not. But it’s much closer to the boardwalk. My dad used to set up a small donut stand here in the summer. Jen and I would run it for him.”
Ali turned the car off and turned to Madison. “You must miss him—and your mom. They were always so kind to me.”
“I do. It wasn’t easy, that’s for sure. But Jenny and I have each other, so that helps a lot. I hope you keep in touch with your parents. Because once they’re gone it changes everything.”
“I do. I usually talk to them once a week. I guess I’m a little behind. I haven’t called them since I’ve been back in Clyde.”
“Ali.”
Ali held up her hand. “I know. I know. I’ll call them later.”
“Give them my best, please. I always liked your parents.”
“They adored you.” Ali paused. “I’m so sorry, Madison.”
“Sorry for what?”
“About your parents.”
Madison shrugged. “Thanks. I haven’t been back here since Dad died.”
“You okay doing this?”
“Absolutely. I’ve just been too busy with O’s to make the time. It’s good to be back.” She was looking forward to showing Ali around. “Ready?”
“Yep.” Ali got out of the car and went around to Madison’s side. She offered Madison her hand. Madison appreciated the help. Her back wasn’t a hundred percent yet, and Ali was right. She needed to take it easy.
“Remember to let me know if you need to rest or if you have pain. Did you remember your pills?”
Madison patted her pocket. “Want to see my straight walk now? I’ve been dying to show you.” Ali didn’t wait for an answer. She took several steps, swinging her hips wide from side to side.
“Oh, Ali, please do not do that when we go out.”
Ali turned her face to Madison. “You’re just jealous.” She turned around and pranced in a circle ending up back by Madison’s side. She slipped her arm through Madison’s. It felt familiar and nice. Madison fought the comfortable feeling. She considered pulling her arm away, but having Ali supporting her while they walked helped. A lot. “This okay?” Ali asked as if reading her mind. “I thought it might help.”
“It does. It’s fine.”
They cut between two booths and stepped onto the boardwalk. There were a few more booths than the last time Madison had been here. One side of the boardwalk was lined with various venders, most of which were closed and probably wouldn’t open for another couple of weeks. The other side was opened to the beach. Madison took a deep breath and filled her lungs with the fresh salt air. She hadn’t realized how much she’d missed that smell. The sound of the waves crashing on the shore were far enough away that they were soothing but not overwhelming.
“Cotton candy,” Ali said.
“What?”
Ali pointed up ahead. “Cotton candy. I love cotton candy. I hope they have yellow.”
Yes. Madison remembered. They were seventeen when they borrowed Ali’s dad’s car and drove to the Maryland State Fair, less than thirty minutes away. Their parents probably wouldn’t have let them go by themselves if it had been any farther. Ali had downed a large bag of yellow cotton candy almost single-handedly and bought another two bags to take home. She always did have a sweet tooth. Madison could taste the sugary sweetness on her lips when they had a major make-out session later in the car before driving home. The memory made Madison smile.
“Do you mind if I get some?” Ali asked her.
Madison let go of Ali’s arm and pulled a twenty-dollar bill from her pocket. “Can we get a small bag of yellow cotton candy?” she asked the man behind the counter. “And if I pay for two large bags, can you set it aside until we’re ready to leave?”
“Sure.”
Madison paid the man, got her change, and handed the bag to Ali. Ali’s face lit up with a smile. Madison saw that same smile on seventeen-year-old Ali so many years ago. It was one of the things that made Madison fall in love with her.
“Thank you. You didn’t have to do that.”
“I couldn’t have you drooling all over the boardwalk.”
Ali pulled a small chunk of cotton candy out of the bag and held it up to Madison.
Madison let Ali feed it to her. It tasted just like she remembered Ali’s lips tasting. She shook away the memory. She just wanted to enjoy today. Taking a walk down memory lane was not part of her plans.
Ali ate several pieces and offered another to Madison. Madison shook her head.
“That’s right. I remember. You aren’t much into sweets. Ironic that you own a donut shop.”
“Ironic that you’re a writer and you…”
Ali stopped walking. “And I what?”
“And you are with someone who can’t think of anything ironic about that.”
“Goof.” They continued at a slow pace.
“Ali, I’m glad you got your dream of being a writer.”
“Thank you. Sometimes I think I suck at it.”
Madison was surprised. Ali seemed so sure of herself and what she wanted. “Why do you say that?”
“Because I sit down to write a book and my brain tells me I don’t know what I’m doing.”
“You said you’re successful, so obviously your brain is an idiot.”
Ali laughed. “I try to prove my brain wrong. I start a book flying by the seat of my pants, making it up as I go. I get about halfway done and my brain starts again, telling me that the book sucks.”
“How do you keep going?” Madison found it fascinating that that was Ali’s writing process.
“I try to remember that I go through the same thing with every book and they seem to come out okay. I get decent reviews.”
“I’ll bet they’re more than decent. I’ll bet they’re glowing.”
“I’ll have to read some of the bad ones to you sometime.”
“How do you deal with that?” Madison wasn’t sure she could handle writing a book, sending it out in the world and having people say bad things about it. She was much too sensitive for that.
“First, I take an honest look at it and see if they have a valid point. I’m always trying to improve. Then I usually laugh.”
That didn’t make any sense. “Laugh?”
“Yeah. If I can’t laugh at someone else’s opinion of my work, then it’s time to quit. You learn to develop a thick skin.”
There weren’t a lot of people out on the boardwalk on a weekday. Madison was glad of that. They could take their time and not be dodging anyone. Her back probably couldn’t handle that. “I would cry.”
“You always were the sensitive type.”
“And sometimes you tried to be too strong and independent. You tried to handle so much on your own.” Madison didn’t say it with any rancor but regretted the words as soon as she said them.
“And look where that’s gotten me. Alone.”
“I’m sorry, Ali.”
“For what? For
saying the truth?” Ali tied the bag of cotton candy closed. She’d barely eaten any of it. “I never have been good at accepting help. I’m trying not to be like that anymore. I’m learning that I don’t have to do everything by myself. I can rely on other people. I let you buy me cotton candy, didn’t I?” She flashed Madison one of those full toothed grins.
Madison refused to let it into her heart, even though it was trying to beat its way in. The twinge in her back was almost a welcomed distraction. “How about we get something a little more substantial to eat. I’m going to need a pill soon.”
“Of course. It looks like there’s a burger stand ahead. Will that do?”
Madison nodded. She took hold of Ali’s arm again.
She took a pill as soon as she took a couple of bites of her burger. She only had a couple more days of medicine left. As long as she didn’t overdo it, that should be enough. Then she would have a drink with Ali as promised. A drink as friends. A drink to show Ali how much she appreciated all her help.
She had had no right to tell Ali when she had to leave town. That just wasn’t right. To her surprise, she was actually looking forward to spending more time with her when she wasn’t in such serious pain. She had told Ali she could stay, but they hadn’t discussed where Ali would stay. She thought about it as she munched on her burger and fries. Should she continue to let Ali stay with her or suggest that she go back to the hotel? There was no reason she couldn’t stay with Madison in the guest room. It had worked out so far. Besides Ali turned out to be a great cook and Madison wouldn’t mind eating a few more of her meals—and having another drink with her—and having her around for a little longer.
“I think we should take it easy,” Ali said after she threw their food wrappers away. “I’m not used to all this walking.” Madison knew she said that to get her to rest. She was sure Ali could walk a mile or two with no problem.
“Should we sit on the beach with our toes in the sand or would you prefer to head home?”
“Sand between my toes sounds nice.”
“Tell you what, you sit on that bench over there.” Ali pointed to a spot just off the boardwalk. “And I’ll go get the beach chairs from the car.”
“I’m not an invalid. I can go with you.”
“Madison, please sit.”
“I thought you said you weren’t going to try to do everything by yourself anymore.”
Ali shook her head. “Are you sure?”
“Yep. I’m not going to push it. I’ll hold onto your arm. We’ll go slow, get the chairs, and sit by the water. I’m fine.”
“Okay.” She put her arm—bent at the elbow—out to Madison. Madison took it and they started back toward the car. Her back was a little sore, but no real pain. She hadn’t had another twinge since taking her medicine.
They got the chairs and settled down by the water. Madison slipped off her shoes and Ali did the same. The sand was warm against the bottom of her feet but felt considerably cooler when she dug them in. She wiggled her toes digging in deeper. They relaxed into a comfortable silence. Madison leaned back, closed her eyes, and lifted her chin to get the full effect of the warm sun on her face.
Her mind drifted back to another time. A younger time. Fragmented memories floated through. Ali in her two-piece bathing suit running through the sand toward Madison, her head tilted back laughing. Grabbing Madison around the waist trying to pull her into the cool water. Falling together in the surf, getting water up her nose, and laughing until she couldn’t breathe. Ali’s parents telling them it was time to leave and holding Ali’s hand hidden under a towel in the back seat on the ride back home. She was so in love with her.
At times she had to work hard not to let it show. They had to hide it away from the world. It was both maddening and exciting to have a secret that was only between the two of them. She stopped her floating memories before they got to the painful part. The part where Ali left, and Madison thought she would dry up like an old leaf and just crumble in the wind. Today she just wanted to think about the good things. Ali would be staying longer. And she was looking forward to it, although she wasn’t ready to admit that yet—to Ali—or to herself.
Chapter Thirteen
Madison’s back was pretty much back to normal. She finished her pills, although she said she probably didn’t need the last few. Ali convinced her to take them, not because she was a fan of taking unnecessary medicine, but because she wanted to make sure Madison didn’t have any more pain.
Ali wished she had brought some nicer clothes with her. She hadn’t packed for a long stay, and it was obvious as she thumbed through what she had hanging in the closet in Madison’s guest room. Not only had Madison invited her to stay in town longer, she said she could still stay at her house. Ali was more than pleasantly surprised. Her maroon shirt with a bit of sheen to it would have to do. It was cut lower than Ali usually wore, but the color looked good on her and it would pair nice with her good jeans.
If she was home, she would pair this outfit with a simple gold chain around her neck and her favorite hoop earrings. But she was out of luck. She studied herself in the full-length mirror on the back of the guest room door. She looked good enough. After all, this wasn’t a date. It was two friends having drinks. Would Madison consider them friends? Probably. She certainly acted like they were friends. Ali knew she needed to put aside any hopes of them getting back together. She could settle for being friends. Reluctantly.
“Are you almost ready?” Madison called up the stairs.
“Yep. Coming.” Ali buttoned the cuffs on her shirt, grabbed a light sweater, and headed down the stairs.
“You look nice,” Madison said.
“Thanks. You do too.” Madison sported a black long-sleeve shirt with thin pinstripes and gray slacks. Her long dark hair had extra curls and her dark lashes were enhanced with just enough mascara to bring out the sparkle in her brown eyes. Unlike Ali’s, her outfit was enhanced with a silver pendant on a thin chain and silver studs in her ears. Her beauty was on full display, and Ali felt underdressed in comparison.
“I have a necklace that would look great with that shirt if you want to borrow it.”
“I would really appreciate that.”
Madison ran upstairs, proof of how much better her back was, and came down holding a gold chain with a ruby dangling gently from it. “Turn around,” she said.
Ali did as she was told. She closed her eyes and tried to ignore the rush that went through her as Madison brushed her hair to one side and slipped the chain around her neck and set the clasp. “There. What do you think?”
Ali took a couple of steps toward the mirror by the front door. She caught a glimpse of Madison behind her. “Beautiful,” she said, forgetting to look at the necklace.
“Let’s get going. I’ve been sitting on that couch too long. I need to get back out in the world.”
They walked side by side, Ali careful to keep a reasonable amount of distance between them the few blocks to Rosie’s Bar. If memory served, there used to be a flower shop where the bar now stood. Ali held the door open for Madison and followed her in. It took a few minutes for her eyes to adjust to the dim lighting. The place was sparsely populated, and Ali assumed it was because it was still early. A few guys were setting up a drum set, microphones, and various paraphernalia in one corner.
“This place will be mobbed soon,” Madison said. “Let’s sit over there.” She indicated a table farthest away from the band. “It’ll be quieter and easier to talk without shouting.”
Ali followed Madison to the table. The server took only a few minutes to arrive, order pad in hand. “What can I get you gals?” she asked. She had a wad of gum shoved in her cheek that she didn’t attempt to hide.
“Whiskey sour,” Madison said. “Beer?” she asked Ali.
“I think I’ll have something a little more exotic tonight. Can I have a margarita, please?”
/>
“Ooh, that is exotic,” Madison teased her.
A margarita seemed fitting seeing that was what she was drinking when Ali bravely—maybe more like foolishly—sent the letters to her exes, bringing her here to this moment. This moment with Madison, a place she never thought she would be.
Three drinks later, Madison reached across the small table and ran a single finger over the ruby dangling from the gold chain a few inches above Ali’s cleavage. “That does look nice on you.”
The unexpected contact sent a surge of electricity through Ali that landed squarely in her crotch. Whoa. It had been a long time since a simple touch had had such an effect on her. She searched her memory to see if any lovers since Madison had had the ability to do that—turn her on with a single touch. The answer was a resounding no.
Madison pulled her hand back almost as suddenly as she had reached out to touch the necklace. What was she thinking touching Ali like that? She could only blame it on the alcohol—and the fact that Ali looked so sexy with her low-cut blouse exposing so much of her skin, the tops of her breasts peeking out. Madison remembered what it was like to run a tongue over that skin. The memory made her wet. She pushed the urge to do that now away. Not only was that a bad idea, but to do it in a bar—a straight bar—made the thought totally outrageous. The last thing she wanted to do was lead Ali on, and that move would surely have done just that. She laughed out loud at how stupid her brain—and her libido—were being. She felt like a teenage boy getting his first glimpse of boobs and letting his hormones go crazy.
She had barely brushed Ali’s skin, but the feeling left her wanting. Wanting what? Wanting sex? It had been quite a while. Wanting Ali? That was just a bad idea. Wanting a connection. Ali just happened to be the one who was close by, she reasoned.
“Thanks,” Ali said.
“Thanks for what?” Madison had been so lost in her head that she lost the thread of their conversation.”
“You said your necklace looks good on me. Thanks for letting me borrow it. Thanks for the compliment. Just thanks.”
Madison had to laugh at herself. “I did say that didn’t I?” She drained the last swallow of her drink and waved the server over. “I think I’m going to have another. How about you?” she asked Ali.
