by Mark Horn
4. Around the Worlds in Fifty Weeks
Do all four suits for the day—one week at a time—so that you complete the full work in forty-nine weeks, with the fiftieth week set aside for special meditations. As above, you could start at the beginning of the traditional counting period or at any time that seems right to you. Since this practice takes two weeks less than one year, it might be a good thing to start the first week of January.
5. Follow Your Calling
Choose one pair from any one suit each day—either the pair that calls to you or the pair you feel most resistant to.
6. Interpenetrating Worlds: Advanced Practice
Once you have followed this practice within each of the four suits, in whatever order works for you, you can start mixing the suits. For example, on the second day, Gevurah of Chesed, you could work with the Five of Pentacles and the Four of Wands, paying attention to how the worlds of the physical and the spiritual interact and influence each other. You can consciously choose which suits to mix or have it decided by shuffling the four cards for each Sephira and seeing what the universe presents you with.
Each day, read the interpretation for the pair(s) you’re working with that day. In these interpretative essays, I share my own experience with this practice. After each pair you’ll find several questions associated with that pairing. Use those questions for either reflection or your own Pentecost journaling exercise.
You’ll probably want to write your own interpretations, questions, and journal entries based on your own life experience. You may wish to focus on a different facet of the day’s pairing than I have. Go for it! Each Sephira can be approached from a variety of angles. To help you consider the many facets of each pair, use the Sephirot key words as described below.
HOW TO USE THE KEY WORDS TO HELP INTERPRET THE CARDS
In the section on the Sephirot, there is a list of key words for each of the lower seven we’ll be working with. When you substitute different key words for each Sephira, a different facet of the day’s energy will be revealed for you to work with. By considering these key words in combination to create a theme for each day and by looking at the cards that correspond to the Sephirot, you’ll find that the cards point to deeper meanings of these concepts and that the key words reveal deeper meanings in the cards. Be alert to the combinations that speak to possible issues or blocks that you face and keep an awareness of the shadow side of these combinations. As you do this, you’ll discover the combination of key words that best fits your experience of the cards and the subject of the Sephirotic healing you should work on that day.
As an example of how this works, let’s look at one pair for the twenty-second day: Chesed of Netzach in Atzilut. This Sephirotic combination corresponds to the Four of Wands as the card of the day’s Sephira and the Seven of Wands as the card of the week’s Sephira. So some of the key word combinations you could make include:
Chesed within Netzach
In the chapters ahead, you’ll see that I have chosen key words that worked for me as I’ve interpreted the cards to work the count over the years. Sometimes I’ll look at more than one combination of key words and concepts as part of a deeper dive into the meaning of the cards and my own self-examination. My choices might change next year, since the issues I might be facing next year might well change. My choices might resonate for you, but try the key word substitutions for yourself each day—you might be surprised at the personal insights that arise. This will help you truly make this your own inner journey, giving you much to contemplate and journal about. In each daily section, I sometimes include several key word combinations to explore an issue. In these sections, when a key word appears, the first letter of that key word will always be capitalized, so you can more quickly recognize and become familiar with them.
If the pairings bring up questions of your own that are different from those I suggest, accept them as the teachers they are and seek out the answers within. As you work with the cards, you should use your own experience and history to help you find the interpretations and questions that mean the most to you at this moment on your path. And each day, find a few minutes to do the meditation for that day’s Sephirotic pairing.
If you do the count at the time it’s traditionally done, at night, you might simply use the reading, images, and questions to set your dream intentions to see what messages you receive.
While this book includes illustrations of each card pairing, I recommend having your own deck and carrying the pairings for each day with you to look at over the course of the day when you have some time to just immerse yourself in the images. Underneath the illustration of each day’s card pairs there is a space for you to fill in the key words that are most meaningful for you. Or you may prefer to do this in a journal. When you have a record of your key word choices, you’ll be able to look back next time you work with that pair to see if your choice is different.
THE MEDITATION
After the reading and reflection, consider experimenting with Sephirotic meditation. You’ll find instructions for opening up to the Sephirotic energies of each day at the end of this book.
THE BLESSING: A NONTRADITIONAL VERSION
Stand and speak this blessing, then the prayer, and then do the count aloud:
Blessed is the One, Sovereign of All Universes and Creator of Time and Space, which has given us the sacred task of learning to make every day count by Counting the Omer.
Today is the ____ day of the Omer. Which makes ____ week(s) and ____ day(s) of the Omer.
THE PRAYER: A NONTRADITIONAL VERSION
Holy One, may it be Your will that by completing the sacred task of Counting the Omer today, any ways I have created separation or division of the Sephirot within me or in my relationships will be healed, made whole and holy. May my counting help to purify and unify my soul at each level, in nefesh, ruach, neshamah, and chaya, so that I may experience Your Divinity throughout and live in harmony with all Creation. Amen.
LOOKING AHEAD TO THE 50TH DAY
Because the practice of Counting the Omer is the preparation for the reenacting of a mythic event—receiving the revelation of the Torah at Mt. Sinai—and because this revelation was experienced by the entire gathering of people at the foot of the mountain at the same time, both Hebrews and members of the “mixed multitude” among them, the practice, which has been solitary up to this point, now becomes a community event.
If you’re following this practice at the same time as other Jews around the world, you may be able to find a community where you would be welcome to join a traditional Tikkun Leil Shavuot. In major cities, there are many such events, and in New York City there are several that are deliciously untraditional and open to all.
If you’re not following this practice at the traditional time or if you prefer to observe the fiftieth day in a different way, let me make two suggestions based on two specific Jewish customs, that of hevruta and minyan.
Hevruta is studying in a pair with a companion on the path who will challenge you and whom you will challenge with questions about your experience to help you go deeper. Obviously, this is something you do with someone you know and trust and who wishes to do this practice as well. This practice builds spiritual intimacy, and as both the Pirkei Avot and the Zohar state, when two people study together, the Divine Presence hovers between them.
The custom of the minyan is praying and studying with a minimum of ten adults. I suggest this for the Tikkun on the fiftieth day. With ten people, each person embodies and holds the energy of one of the Sephirot, and the energy created in this space helps each of you go deeper than you might be able to do otherwise. And as with the custom of hevruta, it recognizes that revelation and enlightenment must be integrated into your life and your relationships. If you have ten companions who are willing to do this work with you at the same time and then come together for a Tikkun on the fiftieth day, your experience can be both revelatory and grounded. There will be more on how to follow this custom in the section o
n the fiftieth day at the end of this book.
If this is not something you can do, though, for whatever reason, don’t be discouraged, and don’t let it stop you from proceeding. Because doing this work over time will connect you to a community of seekers you didn’t know before. You’ll better recognize others who are also doing this work by themselves or in other groups. So if you’re looking for a spiritual home, this practice may be your Divine GPS.
And so we begin. I wish you well on this journey over the next fifty days and on every day after that.
WEEK 1
Chesed
THE FIRST DAY OF THE COUNTING OF THE OMER is the second day of Passover—the first full day of freedom for the ancient Israelites escaping the bondage of Egypt. What better place to begin the count than from a place of freedom and gratitude for the Loving-kindness (Chesed) that pours forth from the Divine and sustains the world in every moment. This love colors the experience of each day and the subsequent Sephirot of the first week.
Day 1: Chesed of Chesed
Starting the Journey with Love
Today is the first day of the Omer.
While each day of the count has four pairs of cards showing that day’s Sephirot in relationship, each week there is one day where the Sephira of the week and the Sephira of the day are the same. On these days, we will look at all four cards that correspond to that one Sephira, so that we can look at how this energy penetrates the four worlds. And today, the very first day, is just such a day. What better way to begin this inner journey than with a double dose of love?
Day 1: Chesed of Chesed
The Four of Wands, Cups, Swords, and Pentacles
_________within_________
The first day of the count is Chesed of Chesed—to remind us that on this path it is essential to start with a heart of Loving-kindness for ourselves. This is a journey that will take us through all the dark places in our hearts, and we need to remember that, just like the Jews in the desert, we’re going to slip sometimes. We’re going to forget to count some days. We’re going to go unconscious in response to the issues the Sephirotic energies can bring up. I’ve done this many times. That’s human nature, and nothing is more in need of Loving-kindness than that.
On the second night of Passover, we are figuratively free of Egypt. This was the first day our ancestors were no longer slaves, and since one of the Passover commandments is that we tell the story as though we ourselves were freed this day, we too are no longer slaves. The question is, What are we free from, and what were we enslaved to?
The ritual of counting days is not new to anyone in a twelve-step program, where you get a chip after your first thirty days of continuous sobriety—freedom from addiction. Sometimes it takes people many months, or even years, to reach that first thirty days. As our ancestors went through the desert, they slipped many times back into their “addiction”: they wanted to go back to Egypt, they worshipped idols, they complained endlessly. Addicts know from experience that spiritual transformation, because that is what a twelve-step program really is about, often takes time. It comes with practice.
It took a forty-nine-day process for the ancient Israelites to learn how to be free from slavery before they could take on the spiritual responsibility of the Torah. In the next forty-nine days, another of the questions to ask might very well be, What am I enslaved to that I am not yet aware of?
In the tarot suits, the cards that correspond to Chesed are the fours, and the first card to look at on this, the first day, is the Four of Wands, or Chesed in Atzilut. It’s appropriate that the image on this card captures the outpouring of Loving-kindness into the world.
The four wands, with a garland of fruit and flowers, look like a chuppah. Thus, this image looks forward to the marriage of Israel and the Divine on Shavuot, the ultimate expression of Love and Mercy. It also is reminiscent of Abraham’s tent, which was described in the midrash*12 as open on all four sides so he could see any and all visitors as they approached, the better to be able to welcome them. This is not wishy-washy Loving-kindness, but rather it is about being active in the world. Today is a day to meditate on the energy that is released when we go from bondage to freedom. And it’s a day to bring our expression of Love into the world in ever more creative ways as we join with the Divine as partners in the ongoing act of Creation. Of course, I’m not always feeling so expansive, so when I consider this card I often ask myself what side of my tent is closed off; where am I reflexively unwelcoming in my life, and how is that keeping me enslaved?
The next Minor Arcana card to consider in looking at Chesed of Chesed is the Four of Cups, for Chesed in B’riah. Here we see someone in what could be a meditative pose, and the image on the card can be interpreted as a warning against distraction. There are some interpretations of this card that suggest the person is not satisfied with what he has and keeps imagining more or that he is desirous of more. But in the context of Chesed in B’riah, the card shows an example of Chesed that just keeps giving—Divine Flow that doesn’t stop Flowing. There isn’t anything required other than a receptive mind for the next cup to appear. Here on this first day of the count, this card serves as a warning sign not to be distracted and miss the ever-present Flow of Lovingkindness available to us.
Chesed is Love, Mercy, and Bounty that Flows without boundary. The suit of Cups, connected to the element of water, feels deeply connected to Chesed and Flow. You’ll recognize this in the famous line from Psalm 23 that expresses gratitude for this quality of Chesed: “My cup runneth over.”1 However, some people shut down in the face of Love that has no boundaries. I know this from my own personal history, and it leads me to consider whether the seated figure has experienced boundary violations and wounding that prevents him from letting Love wash over and through him. An experience like this can be genuinely terrifying for many people because it feels like an obliteration of the self. The ego isn’t strong enough to withstand what can feel like an assault rather than Love. One can only transcend the ego when one’s ego is healthy and secure to start off. So an experience like this in the Four of Cups is a sign of elemental wounding that needs gentle Love, balanced with the Restraint of Gevurah. When someone suffers from this elemental wounding, we need to recognize that starting a journey with a blast of Chesed can indeed be terrifying. A remedy for this is found in the very next card.
In the Four of Swords, Chesed in Yetzirah, we are given a clue as to how to approach the Omer counting practice, because the Four of Swords, like that of Cups, can also be read as a card of meditation. The card image shows a knight lying on a sepulcher as though he were dead. But this is not a card of death; it’s a card of initiation into starting the inward journey. The knight is in a chapel, and the stained-glass window shows an image of a saint healing a supplicant, with pax, the Latin word for “peace,” in the halo around the saint’s head. It calls to mind the following words of St. Augustine on the subject of meditation. I particularly like the phrase “splendor of eternity” in this quote, since it pairs concepts that are associated with Hod and Netzach.
Who shall lay hold upon his mind and hold it still, that it may stand a little while, and a little while glimpse the splendor of eternity, which stands forever: compare it with time, whose moments never stand, and see it is not comparable.2
The image on the card is a reference to the Night Vigil, the ritual initiation into knighthood. The evening before the title of knight is bestowed on a squire, he prepares himself with a ritual bath of purification. He wears a white robe and enters the chapel with his sword and shield. In some places, the sword and shield are placed on a coffin. In some versions of the ritual, the knight-to-be actually lies down in the open coffin, or rests atop it, and there he spends the night in prayer and meditation.3
The suit of Swords (and in Hermetic Qabalah, the world of Yetzirah) corresponds to the intellectual and mental faculties—the ability to distinguish reality from illusion. The knight-to-be in the Four of Swords is not dead or sleeping. He is ever vigilant
—Swords being the suit of the mind that makes distinctions. He is ready to face the awe and terror that an experience of Chesed can bring to the unstable ego. This is the test of the knight-to-be: not unlike the temptation of Christ in the desert or the temptation of Gautama Buddha by Mara, he must face his fears in order to undergo a spiritual transformation. Of course, when we look at this card, the first thought is that the fear is of death. And this is true, since the job of a knight, a warrior for Christ, is to face death: it’s just not the whole truth.
Remember that Chesed is both Boundless and “Boundary-less” and that to face this is to face the obliteration of the ego, a kind of death, which is a pretty terrifying prospect. The task of the knight-to-be is to face this fear and come away with an experience that is beyond duality—that he is both a separate being and an egoless expression of Divine Love.
The best expression of this idea that I know of comes from outside the Judeo-Christian tradition. It is in the words of Krishna to Arjuna in the Bhagavad Gita. In this story, Arjuna hesitates before battle; he does not want to kill anyone (least of all his cousins with whom he is at war). But Krishna tells him that the Spirit that pervades the universe cannot kill or be killed:
That by which all this is pervaded—that know for certain to be indestructible. None has the power to destroy this Immutable.
Of this indwelling Self, the ever-changeless, the indestructible, the illimitable—these bodies are said to have an end. Fight therefore, O descendant of Bharata.
He who takes the Self to be the slayer, he who takes It to be the slain, neither of these knows. It does not slay, nor is It slain.
