by Robin Roseau
I lost track of the days. I lost the ability to thank them for bathroom breaks. I stopped asking for them.
I wet my bed.
I didn't even notice. Elisabeth did. "Oh honey," she said as soon as she walked in. I could barely look at her; I had so little energy. I didn't know what she was upset about now.
When I finally understood, I sobbed in embarrassment. I let Elisabeth hold me, even though I knew I stank horribly.
She picked me up and carried me from the room. I lolled in her arms. She said, "Close the door. Absolutely no one goes in."
Then she carried me home. Lara was in the living room, napping on the sofa.
"What happened?" she yelled.
"Nothing," Elisabeth said. "I am handling it."
Elisabeth carried me upstairs, set me on the edge of the tub, and started the water. She pulled my horrible clothes off me then lowered me into the rising water.
Lara appeared in the doorway moving slowly. Her nose told the story. I turned away, still sobbing my embarrassment.
"Oh honey," she said.
Elisabeth collected my clothes from the floor and tossed them into the shower. She turned the water on and let the water wash away the evidence.
"Find someone to stay with her," Elisabeth said. "Let her bathe. Wash her hair. I'll take care of the other evidence."
"It's going to just happen again," I said.
"No, it won't," Elisabeth said. "I'll see to it."
Lara made a phone call, and a few minutes later, Serena and Francesca arrived. She talked to them quietly, and then the two of them replaced Elisabeth. Francesca bathed me like a baby while Serena waited.
Elisabeth disappeared. She was gone for a while. Francesca and Serena had just pulled me from the tub when she got back. They were drying me and helping me to dress. Elisabeth stepped into the room, picked me up, and carried me into the bedroom. Lara was sitting on the bed. Elisabeth set me on the bed, and Lara lay down on her side, trying to cuddle me. I turned away from her and let her hold me for a minute, then I pushed away from her and stood up.
"Take me back to my cell," I said. "Unless you're letting me go."
Elisabeth and Serena were kind as they marched me back to the cell.
Elisabeth had cleaned my room for me. Everything was fresh.
After that, I got a bathroom break with every bottle of water, whether I needed it or not, and another one late at night. There weren't any other accidents.
I still didn't eat.
A New Plan
I had no idea how long I'd been kept in the cell, but I found out later it was nine days. Lara was nearly due. I hadn't eaten a single morsel of food.
The door open and Lara shuffled in slowly, Elisabeth behind her.
"Please sit up," Lara said. I struggled, and Elisabeth helped me. Then she helped Lara sit down beside me.
"Six months," Lara said. "If they're alive in six months, I'll hire Greg. I won't let you do this yourself. It's more complicated than you realize."
"Hire him now."
"He's still not available."
"Will he be available in six months?"
"If he's not," she said. "We'll help you do it."
I looked over at her. "Help me now."
She sighed. "Serena," she said. Serena stepped into the room. I noticed they weren't closing the door in between visitors. I was too weak to take advantage of it.
Lara noticed me glance at the door. "You'd have a chance if you had kept your strength up."
I shook my head. I didn't want to waste energy on the words. I knew there were more wolves outside my door.
Serena handed Lara a manila folder.
Lara removed a picture from the folder and handed it to me. It was black and white and was just blobs. I couldn't really focus on it.
"What?"
"That's my latest ultrasound. That's Rebecca, and that's Celeste. Or maybe the other way around. I'm not sure."
I looked at the ultrasound. "Pretty."
"Our babies, Michaela."
"Your babies."
"Our babies!" she yelled. "Those are our babies. Our babies. Our babies. They have two mothers. And I am not raising them alone. We started this together, and you are going to help me raise them. You are going to teach them to become pups, and you are going to teach them what it means to be a fox. Our babies!"
I stared at the ultrasound, too dull-witted to understand.
Lara handed me another photo. It was a picture of her and me at our wedding.
I started to cry.
She handed me another photo: her and me in fur. We were playing.
Then a photo of her alone in fur. Then her as a human, looking very happy.
"I took this one," I said.
"Yes, you did. And I was looking at you and thinking of how much love I was feeling."
There was a photo of Elisabeth. One of Angel and Scarlett together. One of my students from last year.
There was a get-well card Kaylee had made and another signed by all my current students.
She had a picture of me in my kayak and a second one with both of us taken the day I'd used my fishing rod to let her drag me through a race. I was laughing.
"This isn't fair," I told her.
"This is what you've forgotten!" Then she pulled them all away from me except the ultrasound. "Our babies need you! I need you!"
She looked up at Elisabeth. "Help me up please." Elisabeth and Serena pulled her to her feet. Lara left all the pictures.
"You will eat your breakfast," Lara said. "You are going to need your strength. Greg Freund gets here in an hour to help plan your assault. You may want a shower as well. Everyone will be waiting when you are ready."
And then slowly she walked out. I stared after her. Francesca and Karen were waiting, and I saw them each take an arm, and then she was out of sight.
I looked at the ultrasound. "Her babies," I said quietly.
"No," Elisabeth said. "Your babies. Do you want to shower before or after breakfast?"
I blinked at her. "I don't understand."
"That's because you haven't been eating," she said. "Normally you catch on much quicker."
"She's letting me go?"
"Yes."
"I won?"
"If that's what you call it," Elisabeth said.
I looked at the photos, one after another. Then I set them aside and struggled to climb to my feet. Serena stepped forward and helped me.
"Do I stink?" I asked.
"Yes," Elisabeth said.
"One or two bites, then a shower, then breakfast."
Serena stepped out of the room and came back with a plate. "Fruit or cold chicken?" she asked. "We'll have a hot meal for you after your shower, whatever you want."
I looked at the fruit and took a slice of apple. Then a piece of chicken. I tried to take the entire plate from her, but my hands shook too badly.
"I'll bring the plate," she offered. "Just let me know when you want something."
I took another apple slice and nodded. Then Elisabeth helped me walk slowly home.
* * * *
Lara didn't eat breakfast with me. I actually hadn't seen her.
"Where is she?" I asked.
"My house," Elisabeth said. "Crying."
I didn't have an answer for that. I ate slowly and carefully, not caring much what it was. I remembered there was bacon.
"I'm going to get sick if I eat more," I said. I hadn't eaten much.
"We'll bring it with us," Elisabeth said. "We have a warming plate ready in the conference room."
I nodded and climbed to my feet. Elisabeth helped me walk back to the barracks. I was still pretty unsteady. I climbed the stairs slowly.
When I stepped into the conference room, Greg and Wendy were there along with Serena, Karen and Emanuel.
Greg and Wendy looked at me with sad eyes, but they crossed the room and hugged me. Elisabeth helped me to a chair, and everyone else sat down, Elisabeth next to me. Greg had the head of the
table. Greg had a stack of manila folders in front of him. Elisabeth had one as well.
"I thought you weren't available."
"I'm not," he said. "I'm heading back this afternoon. I don't know how long the current assignment is going to take. I'm so sorry, Michaela."
"Not your fault. Thank you for coming."
I looked around the room. "I'm not going to be much good today."
"We have several briefings to discuss," Elisabeth said. "We'll go over them and we'll decide the best course. You will spend the time to get strong before we will let you pursue it. We can refine when your brain is working better."
"All right," I said. "Who is running this?"
"Greg and I are," Elisabeth said. "We're just waiting for two more people and we can start."
I turned to Greg. "Can you tell us about your current assignment?"
"Sorry," he said. "We don't do that. You understand."
I nodded.
We sat quietly. I didn't have anything to say, and they were waiting.
Then the door opened, and Scarlett and Angel stepped in.
I turned to Elisabeth. "What day is it?"
"Wednesday."
"You two should be in school," I said.
"This is more important," Scarlett said.
"They can't help," I told Elisabeth.
"They are here for a reason," Elisabeth said. "Are you really going to fight about this?"
"No. I'm sorry."
I accepted hugs from both of them. Then they stood behind me, a hand on each of my shoulders.
"They're here to touch me?" I asked.
"Partly," Elisabeth said. "Ready to get started?"
I nodded.
"All right," she said. "This is not bait and switch. Greg is here to help plan the assault. But there is a price."
"What price?"
"You have to look at every photo I give you. Really look at it."
I nodded, and she slipped the first photo from her folder. "These are your babies," she said. It was the ultrasound I had seen earlier. "This one is Celeste Elisabeth Burns," she said, pointing. "And this is Rebecca Angel Burns. Or maybe the other way around."
"Really?" Angel asked.
"Really," Elisabeth said.
Angel kissed the top of my head. I took the photo from Elisabeth and stared at it. "Lara's babies," I said quietly.
"Your babies," Elisabeth said. "Can you see them both?"
"Elisabeth, this is stupid."
"This is the price," she said. "You want the information we have. You want to plan an assault. You want Karen's rifle. You want food and support. This is the price. Pay it."
I nodded.
"Point to the two babies," she said. "Show me your babies."
"Lara's babies," I said.
"Your babies," she said. "Which one is which?"
I pointed them out. "We'll name them after they're born," I said. "Celeste Elisabeth and Rebecca Angel."
"Who picked the names?"
"I did."
"Do you see their heads?" I pointed. "Toes?" I pointed. "Hands?" I pointed. "Two beautiful, healthy babies, Michaela. Look at them."
I stared at the ultrasound and nodded. Elisabeth eventually took the photo from me and handed it to Scarlett. She stepped around the table and pinned the photo to the wall where I could see it.
"Greg?" Elisabeth asked.
He opened one of his folders and withdrew a piece of paper. He slid it to me, facing me. I took it. It was a map of Iowa.
"Iowa," he said. "The state's pack has fragmented badly over the last six years. We color-coded the approximate range of each of the fragments. Those borders are not fixed, so don't read too much into them."
I stared at the map.
"There are contingents in Sioux City and Dubuque," Greg explained. "They have small ranges, but they have considered themselves isolated from the main pack for a long time, years, we believe, perhaps decades. They keep to themselves. There have been recent attempts to consume them by the surrounding contingents, but we believe they have not gone well. Our data is not as reliable as we would like."
I looked at Elisabeth and pointed to Des Moines. "There's a Des Moines faction, and they seem to be biggest, according to this map."
"Yes," she said.
"However, the ones you want are in Iowa City," Greg added.
I stared at the map then set it down. Elisabeth pulled the next photo from her folder. "This is Lara when she was Kaylee's age," Elisabeth said. I stared at the photo.
"She was beautiful even then," I said.
"Yes, and fiercely independent," Elisabeth said. "No one realized then she would become our alpha, but in hindsight, it should have been obvious."
I stared at the photo of my wife. I looked at it, then at Angel. "Family resemblance," I said.
"Yes, a little," Elisabeth said. "Angel has her build."
"She's much bigger than I am," Angel said.
"You haven't finished filling out," Elisabeth said. Then Elisabeth took the photo and handed it to Angel. She pinned it to the wall.
Greg began talking again. He slid an aerial photo to me, or perhaps an image from Google Maps. "It is unfortunate we aren't going after the Des Moines faction," he said. "This is a photo of their compound. As you can see, it is quite the fortress."
"And that would be a good thing?" I asked.
"Yes." He slid several more photos. "This is the Iowa City headquarters." I was staring at multiple pictures of a large house in suburbia.
I looked back and forth between the two. "Why is the fortress better?"
"I'm glad you asked that," he said. He leaned past Elisabeth and moved the aerial view of the Iowa City neighborhood to the top. "We highlighted the pack house. As you can see, they have neighbors. Human neighbors." I stared at the photo.
"They set up their headquarters in the middle of a human residential neighborhood?"
"Yes," he said. "With significantly closer neighbors than the house in Madison."
"There are implications," Wendy said. "Basically, an all out military-style assault couldn't be ignored by the human authorities. The other difficulties are related."
"There are also no good places for surveillance that aren't under human control," Greg said. "The photos we've taken have been either at extreme range or from walk-by surveillance."
I looked at the two choices, the compound just outside Des Moines or the neighborhood in Iowa City.
"Michaela," Elisabeth said. "This is the main reason why we refused to help you. If it were the Des Moines pack, the answer would have been different."
"It's not the only reason," Karen said. "We'll get to those."
I nodded before looking at the folder in front of Elisabeth. She pulled out a picture from my wedding day. She added several more. "Do you remember this day from a little over a year ago?" she asked.
"Yes." I stared at the photos.
"What is this one?" she asked.
"Lara and I. Kaylee and Thomas. You and Angel."
"Do you remember your ears?" Angel asked.
"The pack kept howling," I said.
"Why were they howling?" she asked.
"They were happy."
"Yes," Angel said. "They were happy to see you marrying Lara. Weren't they?"
"Don't do this, Angel."
"This is the price," Elisabeth said. "It's a small price given that you're asking the people in the room to die for you."
"I'm not!"
"You are," she said. "Pay the price." She tapped the next photo. "What is this?"
"Lara and I dancing," I said. It was taken from behind me, and Lara couldn't have looked happier.
"She looks happy," Scarlett said. "Tell us why."
"You know why."
"Tell us, Michaela. Why does she look happy?"
"We had just gotten married."
"Keep going," she said.
"We were dancing. We had never danced together before. I didn't know how. I just moved where she wanted
me. It was fun."
Elisabeth made me explain every photo. Then she pulled out more photos and accepted shorter answers for each of them. Me dancing with Ron Berg. Me with Elisabeth, and she looked insanely happy, too.
"Why am I so happy?" she asked.
"I don't know."
"Because I was dancing with you," she said. "I was dancing with my new sister-in-law, and the only person on the planet I love more than her is this woman." She showed me another photo of Lara in her tuxedo.
Angel and Scarlett worked together to pin all the photos on the wall.
Serena slid a plate of food to me and a glass of lemonade. I took them quietly and began to work my way through the food.
Greg sent a bunch of pictures in my direction. "These are the protective forces around the house. There appear to be eight or ten enforcers. We don't get many glimpses of them. They don't patrol the grounds; that would be obvious. But sometimes we see one of them on the deck, and a few times we have gotten lucky with a shot like this." The next photo was taken through the patio door from quite some ways away. In the background stood a wolf.
"What is he holding?" I asked.
"An assault rifle," Greg said. "We don't know the model." Then he showed me several others. "But this is a Glock sub-machine gun." He rattled off the statistics. "We presume the rounds are armor-piercing, but of course, we don't know. They could be straight silver rounds, which are easy to stop with body armor, but of course, will explode a wolf head just fine."
"They're armed like this in a human residential neighborhood and no one cares?"
"Apparently," he said. "We don't know how they're getting away with it."
I paged through the photos. "How do we deal with this?"
"In open ground, that sniper rifle you learned to shoot would be great. But of course, you wouldn't get more than one or two before the rest took cover in the house. After that, well. We have an assault plan we'll show you later."
I nodded. Elisabeth's folder was empty, but then Scarlett gave her another one. It was thicker than the last one. She slipped the first photo to me. It was Bree Callahan. She added photos of Robert and Virginia Callahan.
"Why am I giving you these?" she asked.
"You're reminding me of the help you gave me last year."
"What else?"
"I don't know."
"There are other Bree Callahans in the world," Elisabeth said. "Other girls you're going to help in the future. Maybe this girl." She added a picture of Kaylee. "Or this one." Sophia. "This one." Ava. Then Scarlett and Angel and Chloe and all the other girls in the pack, some of whom I didn't even know.
