by June Tate
‘Oh my God,’ said Amy, looking worried. ‘Here, let’s sit on this bench and you can tell me about it.’
‘Tom’s gone to Ireland and I told him when he comes back, we’ll make a date to get married.’
‘Christ Almighty! Is that all? I should have such a worry.’
‘But you see,’ continued Lily, a deep frown creasing her forehead, ‘I’m not old enough. I can lie about my age, but they’ll need a birth certificate.’
‘That’s right, love. Even with your parents’ consent. Oh I forgot, you ain’t got none, have you?’
Looking at Amy, Lily drew in a deep breath. ‘Well, I have, but I don’t want to see either of them ever again.’
Laying a hand on her friend’s arm Amy said, ‘You don’t have to explain to me, love. Now I can see you do have a problem. Maybe I can help after all.’
With a look of disbelief, Lily asked, ‘How?’
Leaning closer, Amy lowered her voice. ‘Well, dearie, in my game you meet all sorts, and one of my punters is into a bit of forgery now and again. He owes me a favour – I’ll see what I can do. Just give me a few days.’
Hugging Amy, Lily said, ‘Oh, thanks! I was going out of my head with worry.’
‘Well, just keep your fingers crossed. Come on, let’s go and have a drink. Cheer us both up.’
The following morning, Lily was singing as she worked. Rachel, watching her, shook her head. ‘So yesterday you were hell in shoes, today a canary. What’s the story?’
With a smile that could light up The Ditches Lily said, ‘I’m going to marry Tom.’
‘Mazel tov!’ Putting her arms around Lily, Rachel hugged her and said, ‘That’s wonderful news. So why yesterday’s long face?’
With a shrug she said, ‘There was a little problem, but now it’s solved.’
‘So my dear, at last you’ll get all your dreams. A man, marriage, a home and respectability. I’m so happy for you.’ Rachel clapped her hands together in delight. ‘At lunch-time, take a jug to the pub, and fetch home some beer. We’ll celebrate. Am I invited to the wedding?’
‘Of course you are.’
Looking suddenly crestfallen Rachel asked, ‘Does this mean you’ll be leaving me?’
‘Why should it? I can still work for you. I don’t see what difference getting married will make.’
‘Have you discussed this with Tom?’
‘No, why should I?’
With a knowing look Rachel said, ‘You don’t know men, my dear. It strikes me that Tom McCann might have different ideas.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘That Irishman has a lot of pride. He’s got a good job, he may want you to be at home, waiting on him.’
With a derisive snort Lily said, ‘I’m going to be his wife, not his bloody slave.’
Rachel’s laugh was hearty. ‘Ay yi! I can see this marriage is going to be very volatile. Still,’ she nudged Lily in the ribs, ‘making up will be a lot of fun, I’m sure.’
‘Really, Mrs Cohen! Such thoughts from a middle-aged lady.’ But Lily’s eyes twinkled as she chided her.
Tom McCann sat beside his mother’s bed, holding her frail hand in his. He’d been dreadfully shocked when he’d first seen her, for she had aged so much since he had last visited. Now she was propped up against her pillows, asking him about his life.
‘Are you happy, son?’
‘I am, Ma. I’ve got a good job and I’ve a lovely girl who’s going to be me wife. When I go back, we’re going to arrange the wedding.’
Squeezing his hand, his mother smiled softly. ‘Ah, that’s grand to be sure. Every man needs a good woman to take care of him. And mind you care well for your wife, Thomas. Will you be bringing her home to Ireland one day?’
‘I certainly will. I’ve told her all about the family, Newcastle, and the mountains.’
‘Ah, the mountains.’ Kathleen McCann looked out of her window and gazed at them, now bathed in late-autumn sunshine. ‘Every day I look at them and say good morning. I hope to be well enough to take at least one more walk among them.’
Tom was filled with sadness. The doctor had told him his mother was unlikely to recover.
‘One day you, Lily and me will walk them together,’ he promised.
Holding his hand tighter she said, ‘I don’t think so, son. I’m near the end of me days, and I’m happy to go to me Maker. Just you bring up your family with love and honour – that’s all I ask of you. I’m glad you came home and we were able to be together for a while.’
That night, Kathleen McCann slipped quietly away in her sleep.
After the funeral, Tom took a walk along the beach. He breathed in deeply and the smell of seaweed and salt air filled his nostrils. He watched the waves break upon the sand, looked back at the mountains and shed tears for his mother. One day he and Lily would come back here to live, he thought, maybe bring their own children. It would be with them he’d walk among the mountains, for the spirit of his mother would always be there.
The postman popped his head around the door of the shop. ‘Letter for Miss Lily Pickford.’
Lily rushed towards him. ‘That’s me,’ she said excitedly. ‘I’m Lily Pickford.’ She opened it quickly, and the smile faded from her lips as she read.
‘Something wrong, girl?’ asked Rachel, seeing her stricken expression.
‘Tom’s mother’s died. He’s staying on for the funeral and the wake. What’s a wake?’
‘They hold a party to celebrate the life of the person who’s just died.’
‘A party?’ Lily looked shocked.
‘Yes, and what’s wrong with that? All her old friends will be there, remembering the happy times. It’s not a time for sadness, it’s a celebration.’
‘Sounds very strange to me.’
‘So when will he be home?’
Quickly scanning the letter, Lily said, ‘About a week’s time. He’ll write and let me know.’ She blushed as she read the last few words. Rachel diplomatically left her alone.
‘I love and miss you, darling Lily. I can’t wait to hold you in my arms. Soon, very soon, we’ll be together again. Never again will we be apart. Love always, Tom.’
Lily was lying in her bed dreaming of Tom and the Mountains of Mourne when something disturbed her slumbers. Rubbing her eyes, she sat up. She noticed one of the screens had been removed. As her eyes became accustomed to the low light from the street-lamps, she saw a figure sitting on one of the straight-backed chairs that had been drawn up at the foot of her bed. Sitting on it, watching her, was Manny Cohen.
Lily gave a cry of fright. Fear gripped her heart. She looked at him in silence for a moment, trying to gather her wits. ‘What the bleedin’ ’ell are you doing here at this time of night?’ She drew the blanket up around her.
Beneath his hooded eyes, Manny’s lips curled into a cruel grin. His words were slurred. ‘I thought I’d pay you a visit, Lily. I’m sure you get lonely here at night.’
‘You’re drunk!’ she said in disgust.
‘Yes, I am. But I had a most interesting drinking companion tonight.’
Something in his manner made her wary. ‘What do you mean?’
He crossed one knee over the other and leaned against the back of the chair. ‘This man told me the saddest story. It seems that his daughter ran away from home.’
Lily was filled with apprehension as he continued.
‘Apparently his wife has left him and he’s lonely. He wants to find his daughter. You see, he wants someone to love – to play games with.’
She felt sick inside as she realised that Manny, of all people, had uncovered her past. ‘Why are you telling me all this?’ she whispered.
‘Come, Lily. You can’t pretend with me. I know all about you now. You certainly won’t want anyone else to hear the truth about you and your father. I reckon you owe me a favour to keep it quiet.’
What was she to do? A million thoughts crowded into her mind. She knew what Manny wanted, had always wanted. We
ll, she wasn’t going to let this fat slob touch her. Those days finished when she left home. She looked wildly around for her umbrella.
Manny leered at her. ‘There’s nothing you can do. Your weapon has been hidden away. Why don’t you just lie back and enjoy it?’
Lily remembered what Amy had told her about awkward customers. If she was clever, she could handle this. Manny was well into his cups, he would be unsteady on his feet. She smiled invitingly at him.
‘It seems I don’t have any choice, so let’s both enjoy it.’
He looked first surprised, then a little wary. He didn’t trust Lily. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Let me get up and get dressed first.’
‘I don’t want you dressed. I want you naked.’
‘Of course you do, Manny, but think of the fun you’ll have undressing me.’
He wriggled in his chair at the idea, and she saw the expression of raw lust in his eyes. She looked quickly for the bag that held her savings. She wasn’t leaving without them.
‘What do you say, Manny? Shall we play games, just you and me? My father taught me lots of naughty things we can do.’
He was almost salivating with excitement.
‘I’ll get dressed very slowly, so you can watch.’
Speechless, he nodded in agreement.
Lily got carefully to her feet and began to put on her stockings, doing up the garters with deliberation, smoothing her legs as she did so.
Manny’s eyes were glued to her every move.
She stepped into a skirt, then slipped a jumper over her head, pulling it down over her breasts. Then she put on a coat.
He looked at her suspiciously.
‘All the more to take off, darling,’ she promised, gritting her teeth as she did so.
Walking towards him, she stroked his face and ruffled his hair. ‘You have far too many clothes on, Manny. Let me take them off, then you can do the same to me.’
Like a lamb, he did as he was told. He stood up, swaying against the chair. ‘Kiss me, Lily.’
Her stomach turned at the idea. ‘Be patient,’ she whispered in his ear. She took off his jacket and dropped it to the floor, undid the buttons of his shirt and removed his tie, fighting with the strong urge within her to strangle him with it. She slid the shirt off his back. ‘My, what lovely skin you have,’ she said, smoothing his shoulders. Then at last she undid his flies.
Manny’s face was flushed with anticipation. Lily turned her head away from his sour breath as he breathed heavily.
Sliding the trousers down round his ankles, she then took down his underpants. Seeing his swollen member, she thought she would be sick. ‘Such a fuss over such a little thing.’
For a moment there was a look of awareness in his eyes, but Lily dispelled this. ‘I was joking, Manny. You’re a fine man. Would you like me to touch you?’
He nodded.
Lily could hear Amy’s voice in her head. ‘I squeeze their balls until they scream.’
Holding Manny’s scrotum gently, she heard him moan with ecstasy – then she squeezed as hard as she could.
As Manny’s screams of pain filled her ears, she gripped harder. He begged her to let go, but she ignored him and squeezed even tighter. When she was ready, she released her hold.
Manny writhed on the floor, sobbing.
She looked at him, her heart full of hate. This rotten piece of humanity had ruined her future happiness. Her feeling of disgust for the games she had just played and her hatred for the man on the ground made her devoid of emotion. Ignoring him, she buttoned her coat and picked up a couple of her dresses. Taking the shop keys out of his jacket pocket, she put on her shoes, picked up her handbag and, turning to Manny, spat at him, ‘One word out of you about me and my father, and I’ll kill you.’
Walking to the front of the shop, she opened the door and left. Carefully locking up behind her, she gazed at the building with tears in her eyes. She’d been so happy here, but she couldn’t come between Rachel and her son. After all, blood was thicker than water. The woman had been so good to her, she couldn’t do anything that would make her unhappy.
As for her own performance – God! She’d behaved no better than a whore. To her surprise, it hadn’t been that difficult. She’d been revolted, but it wasn’t as bad as she’d envisaged. He deserved the pain she’d inflicted on him. The scumbag. Her eyes bright with anger, she smirked. It would be some time before he’d want a woman, and that fact gave Lily deep satisfaction.
At least this time she had a little money. She could rent a cheap room, maybe get a job. Sticking one foot out, she gave a rueful grin. And she had a pair of shoes. But now she must start again. Her heart was heavy and her shoulders slumped. She could never marry Tom now. Manny knew about her past, and he would be bound to seek his revenge. If he thought she was going to marry Tom, he would make a point of telling him about her father.
That night, in a shabby room she’d rented deep in the heart of the Docklands Lily wept for Tom. Now that she was settled with a roof over her head, her defences were totally annihilated and she felt raw with pain. She pictured Tom’s face the last time they were together. She sobbed when she thought of his return, when he would discover she was no longer there. How hurt he would be. She wept for the loss of her future, of their happiness together. But she couldn’t take the risk of his finding out her secret. It disgusted her. How would he feel? Equally disgusted, she was sure. He would never be able to hold her, make love to her, without the knowledge that her father had enjoyed the same pleasures. It would destroy them both.
Chapter Six
As Tom hurried to the shop in The Ditches he caught sight of Rachel, who was in the middle of hanging up a dress. ‘Good mornin’, Mrs Cohen,’ he said, a broad smile on his lips. ‘Can I speak to Lily?’
She looked at him, a haunted look in her eyes. ‘I’m sorry, lad. She ain’t here.’
Puzzled, he asked, ‘Where is she then, gone on an errand?’
‘No, Tom. I don’t know where she’s gone. She left about five days ago.’
His eyes widened in surprise. ‘What do you mean, left?’
‘I arrived one morning and the shop was still locked. When I opened the door, she’d gone.’
He couldn’t believe what he was being told. ‘Did she take her stuff with her? Did she leave a note? Didn’t she say anything?’ The questions poured forth. ‘I mean, she can’t have just disappeared.’
With a worried expression, Rachel said, ‘She took a couple of dresses, her coat and her handbag. The keys were returned to me later in the day by some young kid who said a girl had given them to him to deliver.’
Seeing the shocked expression on his face she said, ‘Come inside, son, I’ll make you a cup of tea. The kettle has just boiled.’
Stunned by the news, Tom followed her and sat down on the chair she put out for him. He leaned forward, elbows on his knees and hands to his head. ‘But I don’t understand it. We were going to be married.’
‘I know. I know. She told me about it.’ She handed him a mug of steaming liquid. Her heart went out to him, and she cursed her son.
‘What made her do such a thing? Do you know?’
‘No,’ she lied.
‘I’ve got to find her, Mrs Cohen. Find out what’s happened. She can’t have gone far. Did she have much money on her?’
Rachel shook her head. ‘She’d been saving, but she couldn’t have had too much.’
‘But why would she suddenly go off like that? She was so happy here.’ He ran his fingers through his hair in agitation. ‘God knows I’ve tried to get her to move to a room, but no. And now to run off … It doesn’t make sense. Perhaps I should go to the police.’
Her nerves taut with tension, Rachel said, ‘You must do what you think is best, my dear.’
He looked at her shrewdly. ‘Are you telling me everything you know?’
Immediately defensive, she asked, ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
‘Where’s th
at son of yours?’
‘He’s in London, working with my brother. Been there for months.’
Tom sipped the tea. ‘I never trusted him. I saw the way he ogled Lily.’ His eyes narrowed. ‘If I thought your precious Manny had anything to do with this …’
‘How could he? He hasn’t been around for weeks.’
‘I’m going to find her, however long it takes.’ Tom’s jaw tightened. ‘I’ll never stop looking. But now I’m going to report her missing.’ He stood up and, turning slowly, asked, ‘Why didn’t you do that?’
‘Had she not returned my keys, I would have done. But I figured she had a good reason to do such a thing, that it wasn’t my place to interfere.’
Tom was angry. ‘Well, you should have done! Now we’ve lost five days.’ He stormed out of the shop. ‘I’ll be back. If she returns, you get in touch with me, leave a message at The Sailor’s Return.’
After he’d gone, Rachel Cohen sat down, her body trembling. She’d dreaded the return of Tom McCann ever since she had found the shop locked and her son in a drunken sleep, holding his private parts, trousers round his ankles.
She’d quickly locked the door behind her, calling frantically for Lily. Her cries had wakened her son, who sat up and rubbed his eyes, blanching at the pain between his legs, moaning as he tried to move.
‘Where is she?’ Rachel yelled at him.
Holding his throbbing head Manny said, ‘Don’t shout, Mama. For Christ’s sake, don’t shout.’
She went berserk then. ‘Look at you, you dirty filthy bugger.’ She kicked out at him, catching him in the ribs. Ignoring his cry of pain, she screamed at him: ‘Stand up, get dressed, then you had better tell me the truth of what happened here, or I’ll call the police.’
When he tried to concoct some stupid story, she dragged him to his feet. ‘The truth, I said. You lie to me, and I’ll knock your teeth in.’
Never had Manny seen his mother in such a temper. ‘I came to keep Lily company, let myself in with my key.’
Rachel’s eyes glittered. ‘And then? The truth, I said.’
‘She said she wanted to play games with me.’
Rachel caught hold of his ear and twisted.
