by Kim Harrison
And I found them. Very close.
Jenks groaned as I shivered, feeling the touch of purple feathers in my mind. Whirling eyes not seeing me poured forth their strength all around but I couldn’t touch it. Again I whispered, Ta na shay. See me. Help me.
One lazy eye hesitated, falling to me. My pulse thundered in my ears, and I lost myself to the line until that’s all there was and I wasn’t sure if I still stood in that tiny apartment at the edge of Al’s ley line. The mystic didn’t recognize me, and I wrapped my awareness around that single spot of light. Please help me, I begged as it began to lose interest, searching for something else. Give your strength to me. It will make my life hell if you do.
The mystic’s attention darted back to me, drawn by my last thought. I cowered under its full strength, and another turned from the glory of the stars to look. Who are you? the mystic mused, more to itself than me. I remember . . . before you.
Ta na shay, I fumbled, trying to be seen but easily forgotten. Help me.
But it was too late, and my soul quailed as more feather-lidded eyes found me and opened wide.
I know you! one called in terror, but others grasped the thought raging through them like fire as if it was joy. You are the becoming!
Shit, this was not working. I’m sorry, I thought, then made a quick twist in the wave of energy flowing through me. Panic flared, but it wasn’t mine, and that fast, I took the power of the Goddess and made it mine.
“Rache!” Jenks shouted, and my eyes flashed open.
Trent was not holding me upright. He was forcing Felix’s feet to the couch. Cormel was sitting on the vampire, the cloth pressed against his face and snarling. Felix was screaming, out of control as he tried to be free.
“Tislan, tislan. Ta na shay cooreen na da!” I screamed, convulsing at the purity of the line arching through me. It exploded from me, lighting the room in a flash of purple and silver. Jenks flew end over end into the kitchen, his face aghast as Bis caught him inches from the wall. Trent and Cormel were flung from Felix. I couldn’t see Jenks’s tears, but I tasted them in my mind as the mystics brought the image to me, as gentle and easy as breathing. They scintillated within the room, power with direction, just needing to be tasked.
Oh God, what have I done?
“Cooreen na da!” I said again, and the energy filling the room collapsed into Felix, carrying the wandering soul with it.
Felix screamed, the sound finding the pit of my soul and squeezing. It was the cry all make when they first breathe, but behind it was a world of understanding, of pain, of knowing.
For an instant, no one moved, and then Felix screamed again.
Scared, I dropped the line. Blackness hit me, and I stiffened, afraid to move. It was gone, everything, and I froze. I could feel nothing.
“Rachel!” Jenks called, and the world rushed back. Trent took me in a crushing embrace, and I breathed. Numb, I felt his heart beat against me. It reminded mine of what it was supposed to do. It was dark, and I didn’t know why.
“Breathe,” Trent said, his hold never easing. “Stay with me, Rachel. This is where you belong.”
“I know,” I mumbled, but the words seemed hard to form.
Pain iced through me when Felix screamed a third time, and my eyes opened. Trent held me as I stood. Cormel struggled with a bound Felix on the couch. Beyond them, Bis stood on the kitchen counter with Jenks. The gargoyle’s red eyes were round, and his skin was blacker than the line was white. “Am I okay?” I whispered, and he nodded.
“You broke the lights,” he rasped.
Blinking, I realized I had. Only the glow from Jenks’s dust and the candle Trent had started lit the room.
“My God,” Jenks whispered, and my gaze shifted to him. “It worked! He’s got an aura!”
The hunched shadow of Cormel let go as if stung. Shock—unusual and frightening in the undead—shone from him, a forgotten, unneeded emotion. He staggered back as a faint bluish-green haze, patchy and thin, began to rise from Felix. It was his soul, and it was struggling to escape even as Felix writhed, trying to contain it.
“Take the cloth!” I exclaimed. “Burn it! Now!”
Cormel reached out, hand drawing back as if afraid to touch him.
“Oh, for Tink’s ever-humping loving,” Jenks swore, darting down and snatching the silk off Felix.
“Burn it!” I cried out, struggling against Trent’s arms as a thin ribbon of aura trailed from Felix, mixing with Jenks’s dust as he flew to the candle.
“No!” Felix howled, back arched and searching, and then the cloth hit the flame. It went up in a flash. Jenks darted to safety. Felix collapsed, sobbing, but it was different this time, broken, relieved, full of pain. His soul was trapped in him. This wasn’t going to be good.
I can do better than this, I thought, shaking as Ivy came to my mind. She wouldn’t have such a hard time of it since she hadn’t been dead for two centuries.
Cormel inched closer to Felix. “Is it done?” he asked, and I nodded, only now realizing that I was still in Trent’s arms.
His hold was tight in fear, and I looked up at him, seeing the stress in the lines by his eyes. “I’m okay,” I said, and he let go fast.
Jenks hovered close, eyeing me sharply. “You sure?”
My knees felt funny and my head was humming, but I nodded. Cormel dropped to his knees before Felix as the vampire sat up, hands shaking and tears of regret and guilt spilling down his cheeks. This was not going to end well. Ivy would handle this better.
“Rachel is okay,” Bis said, but he was still black in fear as he jumped to my shoulder, his tail wrapping tightly around me. I couldn’t feel the lines at all, and for the first time, I was glad of it. I shouldn’t have wrested the Goddess’s power from her, even if I gave it right back. She was going to start looking for me again, changed aura or not.
“Okay, Rache is all right, but what about him?” Jenks said, and we turned to Felix. My stomach hurt as Felix sobbed, sitting up and trying to wipe his eyes with his bound hands. His bare feet on the carpet looked odd with his business slacks and pressed shirt. It had worked. The real question was, would he survive its success?
“You can let him go,” I said, my voice sounding ragged to my ears. I was suddenly fatigued, and I waved off Trent’s help as I sat down. Buddy was gone. Smart dog. Are my hands sparkling, or is it my imagination? “He’s got his soul,” I added, though it was obvious. For better or worse, he had his soul, and it seemed to be working. Ivy . . .
“She is not okay!” Jenks snarled, and Trent leaned closer to the hovering pixy.
“Yes she is,” he insisted. “Look at her.”
“I am, cookie farts. She’s not okay!”
Bis leaned to put his face next to mine. “You’re okay, Rachel. I can tell.”
But I wasn’t sure how he knew. I started shaking, the entirety of the evening coming down hard. The Goddess had recognized me and my mystics had found me. She’d be on the lookout now. I’d be lucky if I could even use the lines.
“Where is Ivy?” I said, and Cormel looked up from where he still knelt with Felix. I didn’t like the hunger in his eyes. It wasn’t for blood, it was for his soul, and I held my breath, ready to move though every part of me was pained and sluggish.
Trent moved to get between us. “It’s done,” he said firmly, Jenks hovering beside him to create a united front. “She paid her and Ivy’s debt. Give us a token that you free them.”
Cormel turned to Felix, and my lips parted when Felix finally looked up. His eyes held sorrow, but there was hope, too. “I am me,” he said, voice broken. “I am whole.” Eyes shining with tears, he clung to Cormel. “I don’t hunger! Rynn, it’s gone! The ache is gone.” His head dropped. “Let them go. If she can do this, any witch can.”
Cormel stood. Trent shifted, becoming a threatening shadow in the flickering candlelight. “I want my soul. He’s whole and undamaged. Do it now!”
“I did what I promised,” I said, taking Trent’
s arm so I could stand up, awkward because of Bis’s weight, slight as it was. “You know how to find your souls. I’m not going to do it.”
“You refuse me?” Cormel shouted, and Felix looked up, blinking.
“Find someone else!” I said, tentatively tapping a line and breathing in relief when I felt no change, no recognition. “I’m not the only demon in existence. Talk to one of them,” I said softly. “You can’t afford me anymore.”
Cormel’s eyes narrowed, black in the shadow light. “Perhaps. Remember you said that.”
What did he mean by that? I wondered as Cormel helped Felix to his feet. The once-powerful vampire was falling apart. Only time would tell if he could piece himself back together.
“I want a token that our agreement is fulfilled,” I demanded, leaning heavily on Trent. “If you threaten Ivy or myself, you’ll find out what it is to face a free demon, Cormel, and you’ll lose.”
He hardly even gave me a glance as he helped Felix to the door.
“Cormel!” I shouted, and he flung the door open. My anger evaporated. Ivy was there, Nina supporting her. Surrounding them were his men, all of them frustrated that they’d been commanded to stay out.
“Here is your token,” Cormel said, his teeth clenched. “We are done, Morgan. You and Ivy owe me nothing, and I owe you the same.”
Ivy hung in Nina’s grip, eyes dark as she took in my ragged state and Felix’s slumped weariness. The light of possibilities was in her eyes, and Nina was flushed and breathless. Buddy came from the bedroom at the sound of the door opening, and he trotted to Trent.
“Don’t come back to me,” Cormel said, his expression empty as he looked at Ivy, Felix hanging on his arm. “I will not see you.”
Ivy blinked fast, and Nina pulled her out of the way when Cormel gracefully carried Felix through the door. Immediately his aides descended upon them, and in a shockingly short time, they were down the stairs and gone.
“He has his soul?” Ivy finally asked, and I nodded, stiff as I forced myself to move. Where’s my bag?
“I’m so tired,” I breathed as I found it and shuffled to the door, not protesting when Trent scooped me up.
“I told you she shouldn’t do that dumb charm,” Jenks muttered, and I tried to focus. Bis. Where had Bis gone?
“She’s just tired,” Trent said, then more stridently, “No, we’re not taking the dog.”
“But he doesn’t have anyone,” Bis complained, then giggled as Buddy licked him.
My eyes are closed. How do I know Buddy is licking Bis?
“She’s just tired,” Trent said again. “Come on. We could all use a shower.”
I nodded, my head falling onto Trent’s chest. I was too tired to think, but a shower sounded good.
Chapter 10
I can’t. Allergies,” Nina shouted over the wind from the backseat of my MINI Cooper. It had been closer than Trent’s car at Eden Park, a relief to get back even if I wasn’t driving it.
Jenks’s wings drooped as Bis leaned to see the dog, wiggling on Ivy’s lap. “You don’t look allergic,” the pixy said, and Nina made a prissy, fake sneeze even as she rubbed Buddy’s ears. The top was open, and the dog was enjoying himself, tongue hanging out and his tail smacking into the back of my seat with a regular rhythm that nearly matched the clicking of the turn signal. We were almost to the church, thank God. Even with the top open it smelled like vampire, burnt amber, and stinky dog. Reason two for taking my car instead of Trent’s.
Nina was in too good a mood for my liking: too good, and too in control. I didn’t think Felix had the presence of mind to be dipping into her thoughts right now, but it felt as if the worst was yet to come. In contrast, Ivy was tense, her motions edging into that vamp quickness she always took great pains to hide from me.
Trent had driven us to the church despite my protests. I’d counted six yawns from him so far. Bis was on my lap, expression mournful as Jenks continued to try to get someone to take the dog home. Jenks was right. We had enough strays. Rex could take care of herself in a pinch, but Buddy was high maintenance.
“Carport?” Trent asked when we found our street, and he took the curve fast, shooting into the covered spot on momentum. The headlights flashed and bobbed as we careened to a stop, and I braced myself, startled when Bis jumped into the air. Trent wasn’t angry, he simply liked driving my car to its fullest extent.
Ivy and Nina didn’t wait, Nina swinging her legs up and over the side of my small car and to the cement before using her vampire strength to lift Ivy carefully to the walk. “This way, Buddy!” Bis called, and I heard the happy sound of clicking nails and jingling tags.
“This isn’t going to end well,” Jenks said sourly before he darted up and out. “Bis! Keep that dog in the garden until he pees on something! Tink loves a duck, you don’t bring someone into the garden who doesn’t know how to bury their own crap!”
I watched Ivy slowly manage the front steps with Nina’s help. Seeing me with Trent, she smiled softly as Nina yanked the door open, the woman’s chatter never stopping as they went in. Finally the door shut. We were home, but I was too tired to move. My smile faded.
The keys jingled as Trent handed them to me. “You want me to carry you in?”
His tone was amused, but the sad thing was, I was tempted. “Give me a minute. I’m just tired.” Tired and not wanting to have to go in and deal with the mess.
“Me too.” He yawned again. “I’ll call a cab to get back to Eden Park. I don’t want to leave you without a car.”
“Thanks. Take Jenks with you, okay?”
His phone hummed, obvious in the midnight silence. Taking it from a pocket, he silently looked at it, sighed, and tucked it back. “Ellasbeth?” I guessed, and he nodded.
“If it’s important, Quen will call. Huh. I think I left my briefcase in the ever-after.”
He had, but I wasn’t going to suggest we go back and get it. I knew I should be in a better mood, but I was just so tired. “Do you think Cormel will hold to his agreement?” I asked. Maybe that was what had Ivy uptight.
“To the letter. He won’t go to the demons, though. He’s going to talk to Landon.”
“Let him. I’m done with it.” Expression sour, I pulled my shoulder bag from the floor. Landon’s charm had been perfect, but he’d known I’d have to make contact with the Goddess to finish it. That’s why he’d given it to me. Son of a bitch . . . “Trent, the mystics recognized me.”
Trent was silent for half a second, and then he moved, his motion fast as he got out. “I think I left my tablet inside. I should get it before I go.”
“You saw them, didn’t you?” I said, confused. He hadn’t ignored me, but burn my cookies if he didn’t look . . . scared. Our doors shut almost together, and I gathered my resolve. I wasn’t going to let this go and possibly fester. “You and Jenks both,” I said as I met him at the back of the car. “The mystics.”
Eyes on the street, Trent looped his arm in mine. “Yes.”
My pulse quickened. “Is it bad?” I asked, that same nauseous feeling clenching in my stomach as the memory of that black nothing I’d felt rose up. Jenks’s call and Trent’s arms had brought me back. It felt as if I had nearly fallen into shadow. “Trent . . .”
“They follow you like puppies,” Trent said softly, our steps slowing. “Ever since we captured Felix’s soul in the ever-after. Are . . . they speaking to you?”
He was afraid, and I shoved my own fear aside. I knew I’d seen Bis and Buddy with my eyes closed, both of them on the floor as Trent carried me out. It had been a compilation vision of at least a dozen mystics, cobbled together and presented to me in a way that my mind could interpret naturally—sophisticated and practiced. They weren’t the Goddess’s mystics, but the ones that Newt trapped in reality so they couldn’t poison the Goddess. They were alone and unable to become, but the alternative was their complete obliteration. But had I heard them? No, the connection had not been that deep.
“No,” I said s
oftly, and Trent breathed a sigh of relief.
“Good,” he said, his fingers finding mine in the dark as we walked to the church, lights flickering on inside to show where Ivy was. “I don’t think you should do wild elf magic.”
I gave him a sideways look as I opened the door. “You think?” The warmth and light spilled out, and I squinted as we went inside. Trent’s hand was on the small of my back, and I listened for not-there voices telling me about the scatter pattern of the photons, but my thoughts were silent. Safe? I thought, then, with a touch of melancholy, a more certain empty.
“Oh, Rachel,” Trent said, somehow knowing as he pulled me into a hug right there in the foyer. “I’m so sorry.”
He wasn’t talking about tonight, and I tucked my head against his shoulder, breathing in the spicy scent of wine and cinnamon under the reek of burnt amber. I refused to cry, even though I ached. It was stupid to cry over something that would hurt me if I had it. It hadn’t been a choice between the mystics and Trent, though that’s how Newt saw it. Keeping them would have destroyed the Goddess and changed me beyond what anyone could handle.
“I’d give them up again in a heartbeat,” I said, and he tilted his head to give me a kiss. My eyes closed as our lips met. Tingles followed by a swath of warmth plinked through me, and I pressed into him as my arms went around his neck. Even if it had been a choice between them and Trent, I would’ve taken Trent. I didn’t have to explain things to him, and he knew how tight to hold, when to go along with an idea, and when to slow me down so I could think.
The vibrating hum of his phone was almost unheard, but I dropped back to my heels. Too bad I’ll only drag him down from what he could be.
Trent frowned, and from the hallway, Nina called to Ivy that she’d only be a few minutes. The bathroom door shut, and shrugging, I looked at his pocket and his humming phone. “You probably should take that. She’s going to keep calling.”
He said nothing, but his grip eased, and I found a smile. “You want some coffee? It’s going to take at least thirty minutes to get a cab out here.”
