She snatched him into her arms and covered his cheek with kisses. “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”
Roy laughed, a bit watery, and hugged her. “I’m glad you like it.”
“I love it!”
He nodded, pleased. “How about some breakfast? While you’re cookin’ you can tell me all about your date last night.”
* * * *
After her father left, she packed up her freshest fruits and carefully loaded the bushels into the back of the Great White. Yes, she’d named her truck. So what?
When she reached the market the sun was a hot ball of white in the bleached sky, heating her exposed shoulders. Climbing into the bed of the Great White she dragged the last of the bushels to the edge.
“Need a hand?”
She stilled, completely aware of her butt sticking high into the air, as she placed the sexy voice.
Her breath quickened as she dragged a hand over her cheek, wiping the sweat off her nose. Once she had herself somewhat together she turned. “Kelly, what are you doing here?”
“I needed some…apples.”
Her mouth quirked and she reached into the bushel at her feet. Her fist closed over a granny smith and tossed it to him. He caught it without flinching and his mouth curved in a half smile as he sank his pearly teeth into it with a juicy snap.
“Mmm. Sweet,” he said as he bit off a section and chewed.
“You might want to wash that first. It’s fresh from my gardens.”
He shrugged. “Nothin’ wrong with dirty.”
Her motions staggered and her heart raced. Turning, she quickly jumped down from the truck, and hoisted up the bushel of apples. He grabbed a basket of pears as if it were a sack of feathers and followed her into the back of the market.
“So you got a new truck?”
“Yes.” What was he doing there? Her focus was on the door at the back of the store. Escape. “You don’t have to do that.” She motioned to the bushel he carried as she lugged the apples into the storage room, grunting as she hoisted them onto the table.
“It’s no problem. The truck’s nice. So how was your date last night?”
She blinked and averted her eyes, busying herself with the lemon vinegar spray she made to polish the produce. “It was fine.”
Polishing the apples one by one, she lined them neatly in cardboard display racks that would go into the storeroom. Maybe if she pretended there was nothing odd about his presence she wouldn’t freak out. Part of her was tempted to have a teenybopper boy band episode and start squealing like a star struck kid, but she refrained. Polishing apples it was.
“You like Josh?”
She shrugged. Okay, seriously, what is he doing here? Annnnnnnd…now her hands were shaking. “He said he worked with your family,” she deflected, rather than answer his question.
“Yeah. Has for almost five years now. You gonna go out with him again?”
She frowned. There were so many weird things about this situation. Namely, Kelly and her didn’t interact—ever. She continued to polish apples because that was all her mind could sensibly do at the moment and her fingers were seriously trembling.
Kelly handed her another apple and his fingers grazed hers, sending a bolt of unfamiliar heat through her body. Her stomach teetered between the excitement similar to what one experienced sledding down a steep hill and utter queasiness.
“So…are you?” he asked again.
Her words were trapped in her throat. This was so absurd, sitting next to him, talking, in her storage room while polishing apples. “Um…I don’t know. He said something about going out again.”
He grunted and she wasn’t sure what the sound meant. “You know there are plenty of guys who’d be interested in taking you out if you came out of your shell a little. Most people don’t know you. You’re quiet, but you don’t need to resort to online dating.”
She froze. Bile rose in her stomach and she swore her spleen might have shuddered. “What…what did you just say?” she wheezed, placing the apple carefully on the table so she could press her palms into the wooden slab and not rip her hair out and scream like a cartoon.
“You need to be a little more confident.”
She stopped blinking. Mortification hummed like a sharp whistle in her ears. Her vision zeroed in on the table, focusing on each little divot and knick until she found a hole she wished she could shrink and hide in. “How did you know Josh and I met online?”
“He told us.”
“Us?”
“Yeah. Me and my brothers, when we were playing cards.”
Her jaw trembled. Her decision to search for men online wasn’t Josh’s fault, but he just lost some major points in her mind. Her breath was coming too fast and she was pretty sure if she let go of the table she’d fall over.
Why? Why did Kelly McCullough have to know she resorted to online dating? Could her shame be any more complete?
“Um…”
He continued to talk about how she was too shy and how she should wear skirts more often.
Tears welled in her eyes and she whispered, “I think you should go.”
His words cut off. The power of his stare weighed on her like a layer of cement. “Ashlynn—”
“Please leave. Customers aren’t allowed back here.”
The worn wooden surface showed a darkened splotch where a tear had slipped past her lashes and landed.
“Are you crying?”
Her throat was so tight it pained her to speak. “I went online because I was lonely. I don’t expect you to know what that feels like, but there you have it.”
His hand gently touched her shoulder and she flinched, squeezing her eyes shut. God, how many times had she wanted to feel his touch? But never like this, never out of sympathy, or worse, pity. Her obsession with this man dated back to childhood and now he finally noticed her only to list her flaws.
His gravelly voice was soft. “Ashlynn, love, I didn’t mean any harm. Please don’t cry. I’m an arse. Half the time I don’t even know what I’m saying. Please don’t be upset.”
She wasn’t upset as much as she was reacting to the bitter sting of her utter humiliation. The back of his knuckles grazed her jaw and she flinched, jerking away. No one ever touched her like that and the one man she fantasized about doing so was finally there, doing just that, yet it was out of pity.
“Look at me, love.”
Why did he keep calling her that? Slowly, she turned, which took more physical effort than she expected. Those piercing blue eyes were creased with worry. He sunk into the stool beside her and gripped her hand. Those strong fingers fascinated her.
He squeezed. “I know you’re my age, but there’s something about you that’s younger. You don’t have a lot of experience.”
Oh, Lord, please make him stop. How did he know so much about her when a week ago he didn’t know her name?
She said nothing, her gaze fastened to the hand holding hers. “I want you to know, if you ever need to talk to anyone, I’m here.”
What did that mean? They weren’t even friends. She couldn’t talk to him. She could barely think around him.
She tried to evaluate the situation as an outsider. Here she was, polishing apples in her farmer’s market in nothing but dusty denim overalls and a sweat stained tank top and there was Kelly in his fitted black T-shirt, designer jeans, and sexy boots. She wore men’s work boots too, but his were nicer than her raggedy, scuffed leather ones.
“Why did you come here?” she whispered.
He swallowed and she watched his prominent Adam’s apple make a slow glide under the dark shadow of his tanned throat. Kelly had tattoos, lots of tattoos, many written in Gaelic, so she had no idea what they said. One showed on the side of his neck just below the barbell punched through the lobe of his ear.
He looked away. “I needed some apples.”
“Don’t lie to me. Did Josh send you here to break up with me?”
His gaze shot back to hers, eyes wide and s
urrounded by the softest black lashes she’d ever seen on a man. “No. He has no idea I’m here. We play cards together, but we aren’t close friends. He’s more of a family acquaintance.”
“Yet he told you how we met.”
“Well, he asked if I knew you from high school and we got to talking.”
She frowned. Kelly didn’t know her. She was well aware of who he was, but he’d never noticed her. “What did you tell him?” She needed to know what was said. The idea that people actually talked about her when she wasn’t around was mind-boggling.
The color of his cheeks darkened and her stomach tightened. So whatever was said likely wasn’t flattering. “Um…well, I told him I remembered you from high school.”
“You do?”
“Yeah. You were in half my classes,” he said as if it was silly to assume he wouldn’t remember.
“But you never talked to me.” Oh my God, does he remember the day he walked me to the nurse?
“That’s not true. Once you gave me a pencil…” he shook his head. “I knew who you were. Plus, you went to CCD with my sister.”
She remembered Sheilagh, the stunning redhead all the boys followed around as if her pheromones released video game cheat codes. “I didn’t think you knew who I was,” she said in a small voice.
He smiled. “I knew who you were.”
It was her turn to flush. If he was aware of her existence he probably was aware she’d been crushing on him since puberty. Her self-esteem lurched at the memory of the unkempt little girl she once was. Not so unlike the unkempt woman she was now.
“Ashlynn… Just because we didn’t hang around the same crowd doesn’t mean I wasn’t aware of you. Our school wasn’t that big.”
His words were too close to her thoughts. She pulled her hand away and tucked it in the bulky denim covering her lap. “What did you tell Josh about me?”
“That you’re a nice girl, quiet, and he better be respectful to you.”
Her gaze darted to his too fast to mask her shock. He’d given Josh a warning? Why?
Seeming to read her curiosity, he said, “I know you haven’t…dated much—”
She snorted. “Try—at all.”
His lips pressed thin as he nodded. “Right. I told Josh he better take it slow with you.”
“Why would you do that?” It was common knowledge Kelly didn’t take it slow with anyone so why would he care what other guys did?
He shrugged. “I’m sure you’re aware of my reputation. I know what guys want. They go in looking at your…peaches, but really they’re hopin’ to make some cobbler. You deserve a patient man who’s willing to…wait.”
Her mind screamed. How the hell did he know so much about her? They lived in a small town, but she’d always been more of an outsider than anything else. Embarrassment choked her as she realized she was like a science project to the locals her age.
Yes, she was probably the last virgin standing. So what? As much as it probably looked like a result of her absent social life it wasn’t. Even if she had a boyfriend—a great boyfriend—she’d still make him wait for marriage. It was what she believed, a promise she’d given her father, and a vow to God that meant something.
Indignation bit at her pride. “Just because a man buys me dinner or brings me flowers, doesn’t mean he’s getting any…cobbler.” Were the peaches her breasts?
“I know. That’s why I told him to keep it respectful.”
Was she such a charity case even Kelly took pity on her? Josh wasn’t rude. He was soft spoken and easy going. Not once during their date had she felt threatened. Was that Josh or a result of Kelly’s warning?
She turned away in confusion. “How did you know that about me?”
“That you’re a virgin?”
The word shot through her and she winced.
“Hey, Ashlynn, there’s nothing wrong with that. My brother was a virgin until he was nearly thirty.”
“Colin?”
“Yes.”
“Kelly, he was going to be a priest. It’s a little different.”
“Why? You each made choices based on your faith. Don’t be ashamed of believing in something.”
She lifted her gaze and met his stare. “I’m not.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“I’m just a little shocked my…virginity is common knowledge. Oh, God. I guess Josh knows.”
“So what? If you two were dating it would only be a matter of time before he found out. Look at it this way, he knows and it didn’t change his mind about your date.”
“That’s true.”
“It isn’t a bad thing, Ashlynn.”
Every muscle in her face seemed to unclench. She stared up at him, her eyes pleading and the words slipped out before she could draw them back. “Would you date a virgin?”
His lips buttoned up and he looked away. “Uh, I’m a little too…I got a sweet tooth.”
She frowned. “What?”
He blew out a breath. “I like sex, love. Lots of sex. Crazy, swinging from the chandeliers, make you scream, feel it days later sex.” He scratched his head and grimaced. “I’m really not that complicated. I basically only come with two settings, hungry and horny.” He laughed and gazed away, mumbling, “If you don’t see me with a hard on, make me food. Ah, but then I start thinking about cobbler and soft peaches and…” He cleared his throat and shifted.
She didn’t know where to look, but she couldn’t look at him. Her head turned with jagged increments as she focused her stare anywhere but at him.
He chuckled. “Sorry. Maybe that was a bit too graphic on my part.”
“Sometimes waiting means more than the act,” she offered lamely. Her decision really couldn’t compete with chandelier monkey screaming antics—not with Kelly. That was for sure. And was he actually talking about cobbler or was it a metaphor? Did he do stuff with food? Jeeze, she was ignorant, but now she was really curious.
“I have no doubt your choices hold meaning, but I’ve been at it too long to give it up.”
Her father never brought another woman home after her mother passed away. It was interesting that some men claimed to need the act, but others could abstain. Then there were the women who complained about it and the women who practically hunted for it. She didn’t know whom to believe.
“What’s going through that pretty head of yours?” he asked, again catching her off guard with a compliment that ricocheted like a chauvinistic insult.
“I don’t know…how to judge something I’ve never tried. I have no experience.”
“You’ll get there. You know how kissing can be great with some people and terrible with others? Sex is like that. With the right person it’s right. With the wrong person it’s ‘Where’s the closest exit?’.”
Her neck heated. “I wouldn’t know about that either.”
He laughed, then the sound immediately cut off. “Ashlynn, you’ve been kissed.”
Hanging her head, she gave the slightest shake.
When he didn’t say anything for over a minute, she chanced a glance in his direction. His eyes had changed and there was a smoky heat coming from his gaze that trapped her attention.
“Tell me that isn’t true,” he whispered, voice gone husky.
She shrugged. “Pathetic, right?” Laughing it off to hide her humility, she grabbed an apple.
His hand caught hers, fingers curling around her wrist, heat burning through her skin. “Why didn’t Josh kiss you last night?”
She shrugged, but she couldn’t let Kelly fault Josh for that. “I was afraid I’d mess it up and he wouldn’t ask me out again.” Why was she confessing so much to the one man she wanted to impress?
His fingers tightened. “You’re afraid of kissing?”
“I’m afraid of all of it.”
They were silent for a long moment and then, “Let me kiss you.”
Her head twisted so fast a sharp pain shot up the tendons in her neck. “What?” Her heart hammered in her chest.<
br />
“Let me be your first kiss. I’ve kissed hundreds of women. Let me teach you how to properly kiss a man.”
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
A flutter of muscles twitched at her pelvis, muscles she never paid attention to before. Her heart raced as Kelly stared at her, awaiting her reply. His deep blue eyes darkened like wet denim as he stared into her in the way no man ever had.
“Is this a joke?” she rasped.
“No joke, love. I don’t know what it is, but I really want to be the guy who gives you your first kiss.”
“Wha—why?” she sputtered.
She couldn’t do it. She’d dreamt about those lips for years, but she was supposed to kiss Kelly McCullough once she learned how to kiss properly. There would be no experimenting on him. She barely had the nerve to experiment on Josh.
“I don’t know,” she whispered.
Did he shift closer? Her breathing turned rapid and shallow. She was going to pass out. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
His nostrils flared as if he didn’t like being told no. Something flashed in his eyes, too fast for her to label. His dark brows lowered. “Why not?”
She searched for an excuse. “Because kisses aren’t negotiated. They’re a spontaneous burst of emotion focused into a physical act of mutual affection and desire.”
“I see,” he said, blue eyes narrowing as if her refusal actually irritated him. He slapped the table quickly, blanking his expression, and she jumped. His voice returned to the easygoing norm. “Well, it was good chatting with you. Next time you’re in the bar come over and say hi.”
What?
He stood and chucked his half-eaten apple in the rubbish bin. This had to be the strangest morning of her life.
“See you around, love.”
She blinked. “Um….bye?”
And like that, he walked out the door.
Her head was reeling. Kelly McCullough just spent the morning polishing apples and discussing cobbler and sex with her. Stuff like that didn’t happen.
Swiping her hand over the table she pushed all the unpolished apples back in the bushel. She carried the cardboard trays to the back counter, still processing the dizzying conversation.
Chaste Page 7
