by Erin Trejo
“Where have you been? Did you know that I was being held captive?” I snap at him. He was the only person I’ve known since I lived with Harvey.
“Calm down and watch your tone.” I cross my arms over my chest and glare at him. He rolls his eyes before a hint of a smile crosses his face.
“I didn’t know you were being held captive. You look well for someone that was imprisoned.” A slight laugh comes from him.
“Funny! Where were you when I was being auctioned off? Huh? Harvey trusted you, Don.” His face falls at the mention of Harvey’s name.
“I know. I failed him just like I failed you. Things weren’t supposed to happen the way they did and I’m sorry for that. I can’t fix it now. Just be glad that Jaxson bought you.” Why is that always a good thing? Jaxson is as bad as they come!
“Oh, yes. Because he is such an upstanding citizen.” Now it’s my turn to roll my eyes.
“I know this doesn’t all make sense to you, Jade but it will in time.”
“Do you know why Jaxson wants me to stay with him until I turn twenty-one?” He shakes his head no but I can see the truth behind his eyes.
“Please, Don. I need to know what I’m up against.” I beg him. I will beg. I’m not above that.
“I wish I could tell you, Jade. I really do. I made a promise to Harvey that I would protect you and watch after you until you had to know the truth. I failed in all aspects.”
“Yes, you did. Miserably might I add.” Jaxson. How could I think that I would get to have any kind of conversation with him lurking around?
“Mr. Murphy.” Don nods at him. Oh, my god. He has everyone warped.
“At least now you can see that Don is in fact, alive and well.” He nudges me with his arm. Don’s eyes flicker to mine.
“You thought I was dead?” He asks sounding shocked that I’d even care. Of course, he was always strange and creepy but he didn’t make a move on me until that night and I was never afraid of him. In fact, I almost looked at him as a protector after Harvey was gone.
“Oh, very much so. She had it in her head that I killed you. Of course, I tried to reassure her that, that wasn’t the case. She is a bit hardheaded.” I pull my eyes from Don’s and look up at Jax.
“When did this become rag on Jade night?” He shrugs his shoulders as I turn back to Don.
“Why didn’t Harvey want me to know anything?” I watch him search for words. He’s choosing them carefully.
“The same reason Jaxson hasn’t told you. To protect you.”
Chapter 59
I storm from the building taking deep breaths as I go. I’m so sick of hearing the same thing over and over again.
“Are you ok?” Why is he everywhere? I turn on him, pinning him with my eyes.
“Why are you everywhere Jax? I can’t get away from you! Not even for a second!” I rant about not caring anymore who sees me. Fuck them. Fuck this. All of it.
Jaxson watches me with his hands in his pockets. I wonder if that’s his usual stance when he’s as relaxed as he looks. Asshole.
“Stop watching me!” I snap as I walk in small circles.
“Dance with me.” I narrow my eyes before I look up at him.
“What?”
“Dance with me.” He repeats. I shake my head and mumble things under my breath. I can hear the music from inside but I have no desire to dance.
Jaxson moves slowly, extending his hand to me.
“Do you think that touching me can fix everything, Jax? It can’t. Not anymore.”
“Not anymore? So, there was a time that it could?” he asks with the hint of amusement in his voice.
“I mean it. You can’t keep doing this to me.” I want to break down and cry. I want to lose it. I know I can’t though. Too many people will see the weakness in me and take advantage of that. Now that Jaxson has pointed out all the people that hate me and my family name, they will see that weak spot in me and use it against me.
I take his hand when he doesn’t move it. He slowly pulls me against him, wrapping his arm around my waist.
“Oh, my little puppet. There are so many things that you have yet to learn and I’m afraid for you when you do.” His words seem sincere.
I lay my head against his chest, listening to his heart beat.
“Why are you afraid? I thought nothing scared you?” I ask. I feel the laughter vibrate through his chest. It’s such an overwhelming feeling.
“I can be afraid but not scared. There is a difference. Scared is when you don’t know what’s going to happen or how someone will react. Afraid is knowing that something will happen and you just have to sit back and wait for it. I’m afraid for you, little puppet. There’s a big dark world out there that will consume you whole if you aren’t careful.” His words ring in my head. I don’t want to be consumed. I don’t want to be scared but I am.
Jaxson doesn’t say anything further. He keeps us moving to music that flows from inside.
His heart beats a steady rhythm beneath my ear that calms the whirlwind inside of me.
“I don’t want to be scared.” I whisper not sure if he heard me. Not until I hear him says, “Then let me protect you and be afraid for both of us.”
Chapter 60
The ride back to Jaxson’s was silent. Letting him take over and protect me wasn’t really a thought. I want to handle myself more than anything in the world but without knowledge of who it is I’m up against, my hands are tied. In actuality he’s always been in charge of my protection.
“You’re overthinking things again.” He isn’t even looking at me.
“How do you see me when you aren’t looking?” it was meant to be playful. Jax sighs.
“I can feel you. I can feel what you feel, as absurd as that sounds.” He keeps his gaze out the window.
“What was your mother like before she died?” Jaxson turns to me, his brows pinched together and says, “What made you assume she was dead?”
Isn’t she? I haven’t seen her or heard him talk about her.
“I just assumed.”
“Don’t assume. That’s your first mistake. You make assumptions about others that could get you killed. What did you think of Richard when he first approached us?” Why all the questions now? I must have pissed him off.
“That he wasn’t bad looking. He had a way about him that said he could get what he wanted.” Jaxson huffs, shaking his head.
“Good looking gets you nowhere, Jade. You see outer appearances. The mask that so many keep in place. They fool you into thinking that they are on your level. You made many mistakes tonight, Jade.” He turns away from me quickly. A lump settles in my chest.
Somehow, I’ve managed to anger him. But what’s bothering me is the fact that I feel bad for it. I feel like I’ve let him down.
A hollow feeling sits inside of me. Why does it feel like the ultimate betrayal to him?
I look out my window and try to get my emotions in check.
“Harvey knew this big secret about me too, right?” I won’t look at him. I won’t let him see me break.
“He did. Many people do.” He’s short with me which is how I need him to be right now.
“Am I on the losing end of this game?”
“That depends on the hand you play. You’ve already been dealt a load of shit but you can still come out on top if you play correctly.” I sigh before I lean my head against the cool window.
“Will I hate you when I find out the truth?”
“You should hate me now, little puppet. I did buy you.”
“To protect me.”
“And did I? I took your virginity. Was that protection?”
“No. It was an offer.”
“One that I should have refused.” The final nail in my imaginary coffin. He regrets what he did with me. I always saw it coming. I knew he wouldn’t be satisfied with someone like me.
It was only a matter of time before the truth became clear.
Chapter 61
The walls ar
e almost taunting me in this place. Every one of them different much like the people that want to hurt me. They are all different and I have no idea who they are.
I have drunk a large amount of Jaxson’s liquor yet again as I let things roll around in this head of mine. So many things don’t add up.
What is Jaxson protecting me from? If we’re being honest here, I should be protected from him. He’s the one that’s ripping me to pieces. The invisible strings that he uses to make me dance feel like they are getting tighter and tighter.
“Why do you have a fascination with sculptures?” His voice rings down the hallway as I admire the vase on the table.
“They’re all different. None of them are ever the same. There’s a beauty in difference.”
“Interesting theory.”
“Is it a theory? Real artwork can’t be duplicated. It isn’t possible. Reproductions are fakes. The original will always shine a little brighter and last a little longer than a fake.”
“Are we speaking about artwork now, little puppet or people?” He always changing things around on me. I don’t know what sick thrill he gets from it but he does it.
“Are you fake, Mr. Murphy?” I look up and meet the impressive eyes of a man that could snap his fingers and have a world sitting at his fingertips.
“Is that how you view me, Miss Dell? As a fake?” He takes a step toward me but my body is vibrating already. Maybe it’s anger, maybe it’s the amount of alcohol in my system but whatever it is, I’m pissed.
“I don’t know how to view you anymore, Jaxson. You lie to me.” His eyes flash with his own anger.
“I have never lied to you, Jade. Kept the truth, yes. Lied? No.”
“How is that different? I ask you who my family is and I get no answer.”
“You just answered yourself, Jade. You ask, I don’t tell. That isn’t lying. I may be a lot of things but a liar isn’t one of them.” I huff at that statement. Then reality slaps me in the face. His words from the limo about how he shouldn’t have been with me. He was telling the truth then.
“What are you thinking?” He takes a tentative step toward me.
“That I hate you. That you lie to me. That you don’t really give a shit what happens to me.” His eyes blaze to life.
“If I didn’t care, little puppet, you wouldn’t be here. I could have left you to whatever Don had in mind for you. I could throw you to the wolves and let them take what they want from you.” He growls with rage.
I pick the vase up from the table and examine it. It’s perfect in more ways than one. It’s something I can never be. It’s a Pristine. Highly expensive.
An original. I throw the vase narrowly missing Jaxson. He side steps it.
I watch it as it slams against the wall shattering and falling into a million little pieces. His eyes lock on mine. I point to the broken vase on the floor before I scream, “That’s all I am. Original? No. I’m a million tiny pieces of fucked up. One that can’t be made whole again. That vase is me.”
Chapter 62
Jaxson left me alone after that little show of power. It was all I had in me though. I don’t think I could summon enough strength to ever do it again.
“Jaxson asked that you have this.” Beverly walks into my room with a laptop in her hands. I look at her funny but she just smiles.
“For what?” I ask not knowing what the hell he wants me to do with it.
“He said you would know.” She sets the computer on my bed before turning and gracefully walking away.
“Hey, Beverly?” She stops in the doorway, turning to face me. “Where is Jaxson’s mom?” Her face falls and pales slightly.
“That would be a discussion for you and Mr. Murphy.” She hurries from the room. I watch her go with a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. What does she know? Why is she so loyal to him?
I grab the laptop and pop it open. A small sticky note is attached to the screen.
“I hope this will help with the search on who you are. Original is something you most definably are, Jade. You may not like what you find but I am here if you need me. Jax”
I stare at the note in my hand. Such a sweet gesture for a monster.
I pull up screen after screen typing the Dell name into every search there is. Random things come up, none of them interesting me.
I sit here for hours. My eyes are straining to see the screen when a photo finally shows up in front of me.
“Mom.” It’s her. It’s my mother. I gasp as I look it. She looks so much like me. I scroll the article. I almost faint when I read the words.
“Elizabeth Dell was found murdered in her hotel room Friday evening. Her estranged husband, Brandon Dell has been missing since the incident. You are asked to contact local police if you have any information.”
“What? He’s missing? No, there was an accident. They were killed in an accident.” Tears stream down my cheeks as I look at her face. She was smiling and happy.
He wouldn’t have done that. Would he?
I slam the laptop closed, a new-found anger inside of me. Why did Jaxson do this? Why is he pushing me to this?
Climbing off the bed, I storm across the hall. Shoving his door open, I see him standing out on the veranda.
“Why are you doing this to me?” He doesn’t turn around. In fact, he doesn’t even acknowledge me.
I move closer, my heart slamming in my chest. I pound my fists into his back.
“Why do you hate me, Jaxson!” I scream louder. He finally spins around and pins me with his gaze.
“I don’t hate you, Jade! Stop saying that!” He roars. How else can you explain what he’s doing to me?
“You set me up to fall, Jax. Why?” He shakes his head before grabbing my face in his hands. His thumbs wipe the tears that fall down my face.
“Not to fall, little puppet. I will never let you fall. Don’t you see that what I’m doing is to protect you? Nothing and no one is what they seem. Not even your parents.” His voice has softened as he looks me in the eye.
“What about you?” Jaxson swallows hard.
“What you see is who I am. It’s the best I can give you right now.”
Chapter 63
Jaxson’s lips are soft against mine. He tastes like Bourbon. His tongue slides against mine. So, soft and sensual.
His hand wraps around the back of my neck, pulling me closer to him. The kiss becomes heated. So much so that I can feel the heat building inside of me.
“I need to be inside of you.” Jax whispers against my lips. A shiver rolls over my body just like it always does.
“You said you regretted that.” I remind him of his words before he corrects me.
“No, I said I should have refused. I’ve never regretted a moment with you.” His lips find my jaw, slow soft strokes as he makes his way to my neck. He makes me feel alive. He tears me down only to make me feel like I’m priceless.
“I want you naked on my bed.” Jax bites my lips roughly before shoving me backwards.
I’m out of breath but I stand in front of him pulling my shirt over my head. His eyes follow my every movement.
“Fuck!” He growls. I smile inside knowing that I affect him the way I do. It gives me a sense of power over him that I wouldn’t have otherwise.
“I don’t want it on the bed.” I tell him. He watches me intently as I slide my shorts down my legs. Standing in front of him naked, I take a small step back into the room.
Jaxson’s eyes are predatory. His eyes dance with evil.
“You take one more step and I’ll make you regret it.” His tone is low but the warning is clear. I suck in a breath when my eyes meet his.
“Walk over here.” He says unbuttoning his shirt. He slides it down his arms, revealing his solid chest.
I lick my lips as he undoes the button on his pants, letting them slowly fall to the ground at his feet.
“On your knees.”
I drop to my knees faster than I probably should. His eyes are smiling at my quickn
ess. He likes when I do what I’m told.
“Lick me, little puppet.” I lean forward, grabbing his length in my hand. I run my tongue from the base up his impressive length moaning at the feel of him against my tongue.
“Stop playing games with me, little puppet. Remember who pulls the fucking strings.” His hand tightens in my hair.
I suck the tip into my mouth savoring the taste of his pre-cum on my tongue.
I groan as I suck him further into my throat. His hand tightens in my hair, guiding but not forcing me. I twirl my tongue around him feeling the way he tenses up when I do.
“You are going to pay, little puppet.” He groans. I smile around his dick knowing that I love the way he makes me pay.
A few more sucks and Jax explodes in my mouth. A manly taste that only he can emit. I lick and suck until there is nothing left inside of him. I let his dick out of my mouth with a pop before licking the tip. Much to my surprise, he’s still hard. I swipe my tongue over it one last time before he pulls me up by my hair.
Standing in front of him, he leans in closely and says, “Don’t you ever think I would lie to you again.” In one move, he has me spun around, my chest rubbing against the cold metal table. My ass in the air for his pleasure.
He doesn’t warn me, he only plunges deeply into me. My body reacts to the intrusion much like it always does. Jaxson’s hand slides around the front of my throat, gripping it tightly.
“Never underestimate me, little puppet.” His thrusts become rougher and I love every bit of pain that he inflicts on me.
Chapter 64
What is love? What does it feel like? I know I don’t love Jaxson, at least I don’t think I do.
He has a hold over me that much I’m sure of. I’ve never known love to know what it would feel like.
I walk down the hall with my mind a mess. So many unanswered questions. So many missing pieces to my puzzle.
I stop at the top of the stairs when I hear someone talking. It isn’t Jax.
