by Sara Orwig
Questions haunted her and drove away sleep.
While she was here, with him, she needed to take a long look, make an assessment.
She wanted to take some time before giving up the secret that would change so many lives. Her mother and grandparents would not want her to reveal the truth to Gabe. It would mean they would have to share Rebecca and lose precious time with her.
And Maddie had to forgive Gabe for walking out that summer. He had never made promises to her about commitment. She had fallen in love; he had not. She’d thought she wasn’t carrying a grudge, but maybe she had been. And maybe it was time to forgive him. As for the bigger issue—maybe it was time to tell him about Rebecca.
The next morning, Gabe moved quietly around the kitchen. As he made breakfast and tried to avoid clattering dishes, he couldn’t keep from thinking about her phone calls. He hadn’t heard what she’d said last night, only the tone of her voice, but she’d obviously been talking to someone very special.
The Maddie he had known all his life until her move to Florida would have told him who had called. She had always confided her secrets. He was certain that was no longer the case. Far from it. He was certain she didn’t want him to know.
At the same time, she had insisted it wasn’t a guy. She had said family. He found that difficult to believe, but she had never lied to him before. If not a guy, who was it? He didn’t think she had been talking to her mother, grandmother or grandfather, so who? For that matter, if it had been a guy, why not tell him?
And if it hadn’t been a guy, why was it so private?
Gabe stared out the window without really seeing the yard. He was totally puzzled. The truth hit home that she had a life far away from him and he was no longer any part of it. Why had he always believed she would come back to Texas?
For the first time since her return, he faced the fact that he had always felt their time together really wasn’t over. Now, he saw that notion had been a mistake. She had cut all ties, except with the grandfather who visited her instead of her coming back to Texas to visit him. Maddie would leave this time and never return, and she had made it clear that she didn’t want Gabe to come to Florida.
There had to be a guy, he thought. The realization made his insides clench. He didn’t want another man to be in her life. He knew the feeling was totally ridiculous. He had no claim on Maddie. But he wanted one. The more he thought about marriage and Maddie, the more he wanted it. They fit perfectly—except for her love of Florida and his love of Texas.
Annoyed at his own thoughts, he worked in silence, finally pouring coffee and sitting near the window to wait for her to wake up. He heard a scrape and looked around. Maddie entered the kitchen, and his gloom dissipated.
“Good morning,” he said, ensnared. She wore cream-colored slacks and a matching blouse. Her hair was loose, falling over her shoulders in a golden cascade. He wanted to cross the room, wrap her in his embrace and make love.
Instead, he stood rooted to the spot, watching her. He poured chilled orange juice for her, then crossed to her, holding out the drink. But at the last minute, he couldn’t resist. He set the drink on the nearby counter and wrapped his arms around her and kissed her.
Each time he held her, she hesitated for a few seconds before returning his kiss passionately. He desired her with an intensity that startled him. He wanted to make love with her for hours. In spite of her fiery kisses, he felt he was light-years away from getting to do so.
Her hair was silky, smelling fresh and clean. She was soft, warm, pliant in his arms. He leaned over her, kissing her deeply, wanting to seduce her, knowing he couldn’t get through to her the way he once had. Regret tore at him.
She wriggled away, smoothing her slacks, which were flawless. “We better stick to schedule, Gabe. I have my day booked. Once I arrive in Dallas I have every moment planned. I do need to get there on time.”
“Sure. Have some breakfast.”
He served her and sat with her, sipping his cup of steaming coffee while she ate toast and drank orange juice.
“Do you have any appointments today?” she asked.
“I have an appointment this morning with Jake, and I’ll be at the stockyards later. You like city life. Tonight I’ll show you Dallas. You haven’t seen it for six years, have you?”
“Actually, no.”
“Great. I’ll make dinner reservations.”
He pulled a key out of his pocket. “Here’s a key to my condo. When we get to Dallas, I’ll have the limo drop me at my office. It will take you where you want to go for the rest of the day, and we can meet at my condo in time for dinner. How’s that?”
“Sounds grand,” she said, flashing a warm smile that made him anticipate the evening.
His hand brushed hers as she took the key and slipped it into her pocket. Quickly, she finished her breakfast. Excusing herself and stepping to the window, she called Sol to tell him her plans.
Gabe could easily hear her. She made no effort to speak softly. Whoever she had talked to in Florida, the person had been far more important to her than Sol, and Sol was a lifelong employee and friend. The puzzle grew, and Gabe was at more of a loss than ever.
“I can be ready in ten minutes, Gabe. Is that too soon to leave?”
“Not at all,” he replied, pulling out his cell phone. “My pilot already has an approximate time for our departure. I’ll let him know.”
She rinsed her dishes and placed them in the dishwasher alongside Gabe’s. She hurried out of the kitchen and was gone.
He stared after her, realizing just how big the changes in her were. She had moved on. He shouldn’t expect her to pick up where they’d left off, but somehow he had expected the same close friendship they’d once shared, even if they were not lovers. Growing up, she had always shadowed him, done whatever he was doing, kept in constant touch with him. That sharing seemed to be over. The changes in her shouldn’t continue to surprise him, but they did.
From the moment he had recognized her on the side of the road, she had been one surprise after another. So many unexpected differences now. She was more poised, confident, and didn’t need him the way she used to.
He got ready to go and waited for her at the back door. She entered the room, her long blond hair swinging gently across her shoulders with each step.
He watched while she set the alarm, and then they left.
They chatted through the drive to the airport and then on board the family jet. He had taken women on the jet half a dozen times before, and they had always been impressed with the private plane, even women who came from families that owned their own planes. It was plush, with an elegant interior. He noticed Maddie paid little attention to it, making him wonder about her own lifestyle and how accustomed she was to luxury and to flying.
“Maddie, I want you to visit Texas again,” he said, leaning closer, putting his elbows on his knees. Her skin was flawless. He could look at her all day. Her beauty took his breath.
She smiled, looking cool and reserved, and he knew what her answer would be before she shook her head.
“Gabe, I told you, I don’t plan to return anytime soon. I have a busy life.”
“I can’t believe you’re that wrapped up in your work. There’s no man?”
“Absolutely not. And it’s not all work. I’m wrapped up in my life there. I have family, friends.”
“Your mom doesn’t miss Texas?”
“Actually, she does. Mom’s two lifetime best friends are in Dallas. She visits them several times a year, and she would see Granddad while she was here. She’ll keep seeing them.”
“Maybe I ought to call and prevail on her to bring you along.”
“I’ve outgrown that. I doubt if you will miss me much or often. We’re almost strangers now.”
He reached up to touch her silky hair. “Strangers with you? Not ever. I know so much about you, Maddie, as you do about me. For years we were friends and then it became much, much more,” he said, his voice dropping in ti
mbre as he looked into her wide, brown eyes. Her lips parted, and she drew a deep breath. He wanted to slip the pale buttons free of her blouse and pull her onto his lap. “I know so much about you. I know how you look in passionate moments—”
“Gabe, I walked into that one. So, okay, we still know each other,” she said, gulping for air and obviously trying to make her voice firm. “No, I won’t be back, and, no, you won’t miss me,” she said, surprising him with the note of steel in her reply. “I have a life. It’s over a thousand miles away and does not involve you. You’ve been fine with that for the past six years so don’t tell me it’s different now.”
He caught her chin in his hand and slipped his other arm around her waist suddenly, turning her to look into his eyes. “Then why does your heart pound when I touch you? Why are you breathless? Why are your kisses hot? Why do you cling to me when I kiss you?” he demanded.
He could see anger flash in her eyes. Was she upset that he could see so easily the effect he had on her? When her lips parted, he moved his head to close the last inch between them. He placed his mouth on hers as he kissed her.
She responded, kissing him in return, and he flipped free her seat belt and lifted her to his lap, holding her against him as he continued to kiss her.
When she finally broke away and slipped back to her seat, she buckled up, looking shaken. With a lift to her shoulders, she raised her head to look him straight in the eye.
“So I’m physically attracted to you. I’m vulnerable because I haven’t been kissed in a long time. I can’t resist you physically. But it’s only attraction, Gabe. It’s meaningless, so don’t put stock in my response to you. I mean what I say about leaving Texas.”
“And I mean what I say about getting you to stay longer,” he said, leaning close again. “I want to make love with you, Maddie.”
“It’s not going to happen,” she whispered. “Where’s the lavatory?”
He pointed, telling her. He watched as she walked away, her hips swaying slightly. She was holding back. He had known her too well and for too long. There was something she wasn’t telling him. Whatever it was, it was tied to those phone calls she had taken.
She was gone a long time. When she returned, she looked composed. For the remainder of the flight she managed to keep their conversation turning constantly to impersonal topics.
In Dallas, they took a limo to the headquarters of the Benton family business. Gabe brushed her cheek with a light kiss and climbed out. “See you tonight,” he said, closing the door.
He watched the limo drive away and then entered the office building, already thinking about the evening and where he would make reservations for dinner. It was Saturday. She hadn’t settled on an agency yet to handle selling the ranch, which meant she would be here at least through next week. He hoped longer. He wanted to change her mind about coming back to Texas for a visit. He wanted to change her mind about inviting him to Florida. Most of all, he wanted to change her mind about making love. She set him ablaze. Right now, he wanted to be with her and he had a feeling he wouldn’t be able to concentrate on anything else.
Maddie spent the morning shopping for gifts to take to Rebecca, to her mother and to her grandparents. She met her friends for lunch, which extended into a long afternoon. At half-past four, the group broke up and she took the limo back to Gabe’s condo.
She called him on her cell phone and learned he would be there within the hour.
Using his key, she let herself in and dropped her purchases on a sofa. She walked through the elegant condo that looked untouched. How much time did Gabe actually spend here? Someone probably cleaned for him—often. The hardwood floors gleamed and the dark mahogany furniture held the faint scent of furniture polish. Thick area rugs in deep blues were in various living areas. The view of Dallas would be spectacular at night. She touched the piano, wondering why he had one. She knew he didn’t play a note. She paused at the door of the master bedroom and then roamed around inside. There were a few pictures of Gabe with his brother and his deceased sister, Brittany. There was a picture of Jake, Gabe and Caitlin Santerre, now Caitlin Benton. Maddie had known Caitlin as far back as she could remember because they had gone to school together.
She glanced at the big bed, wondering about Gabe and the women who had been in his life. She was certain there had been women. Gabe was a fun-loving man who liked women, and they liked him.
Maddie left the room, examining each bedroom and finally picking the one the farthest from Gabe’s. After gathering her purchases and carrying them to the bedroom she had chosen, she closed the door. All day she had avoided thinking about Gabe and Rebecca. She would finish her business here and get back to Florida before disaster befell her. She could stop worrying about whether or not she was doing the right thing, or trying to figure out if Gabe had changed and matured.
She should take this evening and enjoy him. But could she do that and not tell him about Rebecca? If she could, then she’d be on her way back home to Florida with her heart intact and her family at peace. Gabe would never know.
It wasn’t that simple. Not after all she had learned about Gabe since being home. He had changed.
Yet when she even speculated about telling Gabe the truth, her insides knotted. He was a take-charge person, a man of action. Once she revealed the truth, there would be no turning back.
Gabe was arrogant. He could have a dig-in-your-heels attitude. His wishes might not coincide with hers at all. If she revealed the truth to him, she had to be sure that was what she wanted. It would tie her life with Gabe’s forever. Was that what she really wanted?
On the other hand, if Gabe had truly changed, grown more responsible, more interested in kids, didn’t Rebecca deserve to know her father? He was a wonderful man. And Gabe deserved to know his daughter.
Who knew what Gabe would want to do? And once he decided, he’d never let up. He had far more wealth than she did. There was no way she could fight him in court or any other way. He had the money, the time, the contacts.
She sat on a chair by a window and called home, getting her mother first and then Rebecca. When she ended the call, she gazed out the window without seeing anything, simply thinking about telling Gabe the truth. She didn’t want to. Yet each time she thought about returning to Florida without him knowing, she didn’t feel right.
She thought about the pregnancy and childbirth she had gone through when she had been twenty-one. During that time, she had wanted Gabe with all her heart. The most joyous moments in her life had also been bitter, because Gabe had walked out on her that summer.
More questions came instead of easy solutions. If she told Gabe about Rebecca, Maddie faced another formidable question. Could she bear to watch him marry someone else while their lives were intertwined? No matter how hot the attraction, she and Gabe could never make a relationship work, because she wouldn’t leave Florida and he wouldn’t leave Texas. Gabe wasn’t the type to settle for a long-distance marriage. So he would marry. He had already mentioned settling down and he was building his home. Then she would have to cooperate with Gabe and his wife. That situation would hurt. Gabe was the only man she had ever loved. She suspected that would be true for the rest of her life.
She still hesitated to reveal Rebecca because it would mean huge changes in her life, along with upheaval in her family’s lives. Changes that would be far-reaching and permanent. It would mean countless trips between Texas and Florida. There would be no leaving Texas behind forever. No matter what happened between her and Gabe during this current trip, revealing the truth would mean her life would be connected to Gabe’s irrevocably. She wasn’t sure she wanted to deal with that.
Thinking of the possibilities, asking herself the tough questions, Maddie frowned as she struggled for decisions.
“Tell him,” she whispered to the empty room, knowing she would have to, yet still dreading it. Taking a deep breath, she walked toward the closed door while arguments battled silently within her.
Yet
she kept coming back to one fact. Rebecca had a right to know her father, who would love her.
Gabe and Rebecca both deserved the truth.
Filled with dread, she got ready to shower and change.
When she finally emerged from the shower, she had a towel wrapped around herself and she had blow-dried her hair.
As she crossed to the boxes she had placed on the bed, there was a knock on the door.
“I’m not dressed.”
“Can I come in anyway?” Gabe called, opening the door a crack. “Are you presentable?” he asked while he was still out of sight.
“Not really. I’m in a towel.”
“Hey, great,” he said, opening the door and stepping inside. He held a dozen red roses in a crystal vase. “I brought these for you.”
“They’re beautiful and should last far beyond the next few minutes.” She smiled. “Do you understand ‘not dressed’ and I’m ‘not presentable’?”
He paused to let his gaze roam slowly over her. “I understand, but you’re wrong. You’re absolutely, gorgeously presentable, and you’re covered more than you would be on the beach or at the pool. Which, speaking of, want to swim?”
“Thank you, I’ll pass.”
He set down the flowers and walked over to place his hands on her bare shoulders. The contact sent streams of fire through her insides.
“Gabe, I’ll see you in a little while.”
“One kiss while I can hold you close, with only a towel between us,” he said softly. His husky voice set her pulse racing as he wrapped her in his arms and kissed her.
She shouldn’t, yet how to resist him? Resistance was impossible when it was Gabe. She wanted to toss aside wisdom and caution and kiss him in return. She wanted to let go and for one brief moment, she did, relishing the feel of him against her. She ached to forget everything and drop the towel, but instead, she stepped away.
“Now you have to go,” she whispered, unable to find her voice. Her heart pounded. She wanted him with an intensity that shook her.
