A Promise Togetherness Forever

by Reshma Ranjan

  He noticed I didn’t heed to his advice, instead I was disgusted at his thoughts. I never even paused to listen or never gave him even slightest importance. Instead, I downright ignored him. Soon, he started hitting me. First it was just slaps, then it became severe blows and kicks. I was already using make-up to cover my dark circles, soon I started plastering more and more make-up to cover my bruises. He started hurting me more. Seeing me bloodied and in pain gave him sadistic satisfaction. He was furious that I was locking the door as soon as I came home after office. I didn’t come out even to make him tea or food.

  One evening he acted as if he was not well and asked me to make him a cup of medicinal coffee. I guess I was stupid that I believed him. I went to the kitchen to make him coffee but he hit me with a pan at the back of my head and raped me in the kitchen. After that I kept away from him all the time. I waited by the shop or talked with the neighbours so that I knew when he was leaving. I would then immediately lock the door to my room. One day he made one of his friends latch the door from outside so he could hide inside the house to attack me. I was fooled once again. He left one mark after the other. Then I was almost sure that there is only one way to end my pain and I had to decide fast. I no longer felt that I had it in me to fight him off.

  A few days back when I returned from office, I was shocked to see the door lock had been removed. When I created a huge scene, he along with his friends jumped upon me and forced me to drink some liquid. I struggled hard and tried to fight them off but in vain. That weekend they used me like I was some kind of a rag-doll. I screamed and shouted to no avail. After the weekend I thought they would let me go. But they waited for me to return from the office to continue the torture. They just didn’t want to rape me, they wanted to push my limits. It was as if they wanted to see how much a woman can endure. It was terrible.” Sunaina paused for a long moment.

  “Piyush, even now I will easily choose to end my life than remember the harrowing nights that followed.”

  Piyush’s jaw was hurting by now. He had been clenching them tight. He wanted desperately to go and kill that bastard with his bare hands.

  “When I made the plan to end everything, you found me asleep on my desk. I was mentally prepared that day. I had tried twice before, but this time I was sure to go all the way. That feeling of self-destruction is inbuilt in me. Rape was just a trigger. Please Piyush, I have read a lot about depression. It is not easy to overcome it. It’s not a pleasant illness which can be cured with some medicine. It affects everyone related to the patient. In my case, I don’t want such beautiful people like you all to suffer.”

  Piyush remained silent for few moments and then he pulled her into his arms and held her tight. “Su-” He whispered. He pressed his lips on her forehead. “Su! Do you trust me?”

  He spoke against her forehead and she frowned. It had been very taxing for her to narrate her agony to him. If she didn’t trust him, she wouldn’t have bared it all. What did he mean? Of course, she trusted him. She managed to nod. “Why else would I share everything with you?”

  His hold tightened. “Then please trust me and be with me as I decide and take a few steps in a day or two.”

  She was confused. Be with him in what?

  Chapter 7

  The next two days went by in a blur. The second day, when Dia helped Sunaina to the bathroom, she placed a new saree for her to wear—an off-white saree with a golden border and a golden blouse to go with it. After the shower, she wore the blouse but it was a little loose unlike her normal blouses. Since it was readymade you couldn’t expect it to be a perfect fit. She was not sure why they gifted her with a new saree and why there were so many relatives around. She heard voices she didn’t recognise as she came out of the bathroom.

  Her long wet hair was still wrapped in the bath towel. She stopped when she saw two beautiful and confident women about her age standing with Mia and Dia. They were all wearing sarees and were looking extremely beautiful. One of them looked like the younger version of Mia, except she was a little taller with light-brown eyes. The shorter one was beautiful too, with different features and a bright smile. As soon as they saw Sunaina, they came towards her. The taller of the two was introduced as Suba and shorter one was Naina, both of them Mia’s daughters. They gave her a hug and Mia took a big round bindi and placed it on Sunaina’s wide forehead. She looked beautiful. Dia helped Sunaina to do the hair. She took a strand of hair from either side by her ears and plated it with a strand from the back of her head. She let the rest of her wet hair in a loose tie. Naina took some flowers from a bag on the side table but Suba jumped in, “Me! I will put the flowers on her hair.”

  Sunaina smiled as the family’s enthusiasm was contagious but she did wonder why everyone wanted to make her look beautiful. She didn’t feel out of place. Then she heard some unknown voices coming towards the room. She saw a stout short but a very beautiful old lady coming in. She was Gayatri, the person who started this beautiful family. And soon she was followed by a few others. She realised she will not be able to keep a tab of all of them. She hoped that she would meet them again before she left, since she had asked Piyush to take her to some hostel. Piyush had not mentioned anything about it or spoken to her much. She had not brought up the topic as well. Then she heard a knock and without waiting for a response, a very tall boy came in, and smiled at everyone. When he noticed Sunaina, he whistled.

  “You are very beautiful!”

  Sunaina blushed. Mia hushed the newcomer. She quickly came over to Sunaina.

  “Please don’t mind him, Milind is like that. He loves theatrics.”

  Sunaina smiled. “It’s OK.” she said softly. Thank you for the compliment!” she said to Milind.

  He smiled at her. Dia told Sunaina that Milind was fast friends with Salim—Sujal’s younger brother. But Salim was in the medical college and hence he couldn’t get permission to come.

  “Come for what? Is there some festival or some party?” Sunaina asked.

  “You’ll see soon. All the ladies are asked to come down. And Piyush has asked if Sunaina needs help to climb down the staircase.” Milind said.

  “I’m fine, thank you.”

  “Even if she is not, we will carry her down. We don’t need the boys.” Naina said, challenging his statement.

  Milind lifted his palms up in mock surrender. “Will convey the message.”

  Sunaina could climb down the steps without much trouble. It still hurt, especially her broken ribs, but she had healed well. As she reached the living room she felt overwhelmed with the entire family members present there. She knew they considered her a part of the family, yet all of them were making her nervous.

  She looked for Piyush but there were too many tall people around. She saw Sujal who nodded at her and then she saw Piyush standing alone by the fire place, leaning on the frame. She smiled at him. He smiled back. He was dressed in a blue denim and a white shirt. She felt an odd twist in her stomach seeing him. She lowered her eyes. One by one, all the family members came to introduce themselves.

  Piyush came to her followed by two men with a ledger in their hand. Every one took seats. Mia lead Sunaina into the room and made her sit on a chair. Piyush came and sat next to her.

  “How are you?” Piyush asked.

  “I am fine. You?” She asked so innocently, he felt she was tugging at his heart. Then a man opened the ledger in front of them.

  “You should sign here.” He said.

  First Piyush signed at the place they showed and he passed the pen to her. She frowned and looked at the ledger and saw the word ‘marriage’ jump out at her. She suddenly stood up.

  “Piyush!” she whispered. She swayed with the sudden move she made. He supported her in a flash and placed a finger on her pink lips shushing her. Excusing himself and Sunaina for a minute, he took her to a room on the ground floor. Sunaina couldn’t think straight. She felt her every step falter.

  “You can’t!” she blurted even before he closed the door.r />
  “Why?”

  “Why!” She looked at him as if she was seeing him for the first time. “To marry someone, shouldn’t you ask her first? POLITELY?”

  “NO! Not when she is not thinking straight.”

  She raised one of her brows, her anger emanating from her. “I am not out of my mind and I am thinking straight. And I don’t want to marry you.” She clenched her teeth.

  “Why?”

  “Why what?” She fumed. “I asked you why do you want to marry me.”

  He shook his head. “I asked you first.”

  She took deep breaths. “What are you doing, Piyush? Look around. You have got the whole family here to marry me? Seriously? What are you trying to do? Be some kind of a saint?”

  “I thought saints didn’t marry.”

  She lunged at him at his reply, clutching his collar. “You think this is a joke?”

  He caught her hands. “Have you seen me joking around much?”

  Her eyes were getting moist. “Why are you doing this?” Her voice was barely a whisper.

  His hands almost crushed her arms. “I am going to marry you. That’s final. Whether you like it or not. I am not sending you to some hostel or a rape survivor’s camp or any such god forsaken place.” His voice was dangerously soft.

  “I don’t want your sympathy. You don’t marry someone when you feel sympathy.” she said through her clenched teeth.

  “I don’t sympathise you, girl!” He spat the words.

  “You don’t even know me.”

  “I know enough to want to marry you.”

  “I doubt that, Piyush. I bared my heart and life in front of you and here you are, making a mockery of my trust by coming up with this awkwardly grandiose idea to give me a life! NO! You don’t know anything. I will not marry you.” Then she took a couple of long breaths as her shoulder sagged. She looked at the man who in the past few days had started to mean a lot.

  “Please stop this, Piyush. I am not meant to lead a normal life of a married woman.”

  “We can overcome the depression, Su. Whatever it is, I have decided to stand by you. I have already got an appointment with a very renowned doctor who can help you with depression.”

  She tried to move away from him, but he held him on.

  “It’s not just that, Piyush.”

  “Then what else?” Piyush wanted to end all her doubts once and for all.

  “Don’t you see? I…I can’t bear to be with a man. Any man. And at the end of the day, you will need companionship. And…” She brought her brows together and almost hissed, “I will not tolerate my husband going to another woman.”

  He looked at her with a twitch on his lips.

  “Piyush, do you know what I went through? I feel disgusted by what they did to me. I don’t want any one touching me like that ever again. I am not so naïve not to know that physical intimacy is a vital part of a couple’s life. How can you think this will work out?”

  “Sunaina, I am not letting you go anywhere to get yourself killed. And I am loyal to any kind of relationship. You are going to be a part of our family without any more argument.”

  She pushed him away. “Piyush! NO! You don’t love me. All you want to do is protect me from doing something stupid.”

  “If it were only about that, I didn’t have to marry you. I could just ask my mom to adopt you. One more person in the family will only make it richer. But no, I want you in my life.”

  She clutched her hands into a fist and with a firmness, she turned quickly. She felt slightly dizzy but she held herself.

  “Piyush! Tell me, can you touch me and not feel disgusted?” Her hands went to her throat, giving away her agitated mind. “Can you kiss me and not remember that I have been used and abused?” She saw him flinch. “Yes. Used, torn, hurt, poked, exploited and abused. I am filthy. Don’t you see that?” By now her tears were flowing nonstop. “You don’t even want me, Piyush. Love is not even a probability. What sort of a marriage do you expect this to be? I am scarred, broken beyond mending. You don’t want me in any way. All you want is to protect me, which you can do without marrying me. You are a young man. A sexless marriage is not what you want. I can give you only that, so please let’s forget this happened. I doubt your family will hold you against it.”

  He only stared at her hard. She didn’t know what he was thinking and it was frustrating. She turned towards the door.

  With a swiftness she didn’t expect, she felt his hands catch her wrist and pull her to him. She crashed right into his chest. The sudden movement made her feel light-headed. As she tried to push him away, his hands held her right there not letting her bring distance between. His eyes held hers, then they slid down to her lips that were now parted, trembling ever so slightly.

  His eyes looking at her lips made her stomach to do a flip. Almost in slow motion, he bent to slightly brush his lips over hers. She gasped. She had expected his lips to crash hard on hers. Instead, his lips brushed against hers softly, once and then twice. He waited for her to push him away. Instead her hands clutched his shirt into a fist. Encouraged, he pressed his lips on hers, softly letting her get the feel. His lips pressed at the corner of her mouth and then slowly captured her upper lip in his and pulled it softly. She took an audible breath. Then his teeth did the same to her lower lips. On its own accord, her body pressed itself against him. Her hands loosened on his shirt. His lips now possessed hers with confidence. They tasted her, devoured her. She felt him pull at the very soul of hers. She didn’t realise that her arms had gone around his neck and her fingers were clutching his silky hair as his kiss became deeper.

  He slowly released her lips and nipped them, and kissed the corner of her lips one last time. She almost sagged into his arms. She let her head rest on his shoulder, hiding her face from him. His hand was on her waist, one on her bare midriff. She felt an odd pull in her lower abdomen. The healing muscles hurt a little at the contraction, and she flinched. He tipped her chin up and looked at her dazzled eyes.

  “What is it?” he asked.

  “It hurts a bit”

  “Where?”

  She lowered her eyes. She moved her hand to the lower abdomen.

  He smiled, “Do you know why?”

  She remained quiet.

  He knew she had the same idea. He let her head rest on his shoulder and lowered his head so that his lips brushed her ears lightly. “Your body wants more than a kiss, Honey! But your body needs rest and I can wait till you are ready. But I guess I have answered the main question. Pressing her to him so she could feel his need for her, he said, “I have found you beautiful from the time I saw you … let’s say…since I saw you without make-up. And I don’t find you disgusting. Why should I? What happened to you is an accident, and you are healing. And those monsters are the ones that are disgusting and filthy. Why should you feel filthy or dirty? They should feel that. I will make you forget everything and start afresh with me. I want to live a life with you. A full-fledged marriage. Why should I or you compromise? We will lead a healthy life. And as far as love is concerned, we can let it happen slowly. And believe me honey, you are very easy to love.”

  Chapter 8

  The day went by in a haze. She saw the curious but warm pairs of eyes on her the whole day. Everyone came to congratulate them once they had signed the paper. Soon, Gayatri hushed the excited Verma Clan and got them to gather in the living room where she asked the newly married couple to exchange garland and rings. She was surprised when the ring fit her perfectly. She never knew when he took her size. Gayatri gave the mangalsutra to Piyush to put it around Sunaina’s neck. Sunaina felt as if she was out of her body and watching everything unfold in front of her. He applied a little sindoor at the beginning of her hairline where her hair parted. She smiled and talked but almost in automation as the whole family was excited to have new member in the family. She was surprised how everyone accepted her as one among them. Slowly, she started feeling tired and exhausted, though everyone made sure sh
e was seated and not exerting much. As she was sitting on the couch Raj came and sat by her side. She tried to get up but he motioned her to sit and sat next to her.

  “Welcome to our family dear!”

  She smiled and thanked him.

  “So, when are you coming back to the office?”

  “In a few days I hope. I can’t be confided in a house doing nothing. As soon as my health permits, I will join back.” She, herself was surprised at her response. Then shaking out of her thoughts she looked at Raj. She had always adored and idolised him and she was surprised to see that he was so down-to-earth and approachable.

  “I liked your ideas for the new project. I like the way you incorporated the environment friendly concept into it. Rainwater harvesting, waste and water recycling, everything was put in the design. Especially the placement of the windows and the patio utilising natural light to the maximum, that was the winning point.”

  She blushed at his compliment.

  “Uncle, are you stealing my girl?” Piyush came and sat on the arm-rest next to her, pulling her to his frame.

  Raj smiled and said, “I wish she was that easy to steal, son. Take care of her, boy. She is one heck of a talented architect. Help her get well soon and bring her back to the office.”

  Piyush smiled and tightened his hold around her, his pride obvious on his face. He looked at her and kissed her by the side of her forehead. There was surprise on Raj’s face and the silence around brought Sunaina’s attention to the people and she realised that almost all eyes were on them. She blushed and Piyush chuckled. She was surprised at his public display of affection. She still felt his imprint on her lips. She let her fingers brush her lips reliving the earlier kiss. His hands on her shoulder tightened. She had to crane her neck to look at his face as he sat high on the armrest. His brows were raised and a wicked tilt of his lips told her that he knew what she had been thinking about. His hands moved up to her neck in a smooth caress and her lips parted as his thumb caressed the sensitive skin behind her ears. Unknowingly, her body leaned towards him, resting her weight on him.