by Seth Eden
Only during rare times like this did I get to see Luca in a role other than mob boss, father, or head of the family. Now, I could relate to him as a man, and a younger one at that since he was only four years my senior. Most of the time, he seemed much older. The life he led required that of him. I even found it attractive.
But watching him in slumber, all his earthly cares temporarily whisked away, made the lines of his face soften. His black hair was long enough to curl slightly at his forehead and ears, and something about the masculinity of his thick dark eyebrows and beard made me want to reach out and drag a finger through every beautiful inch of it.
I loved seeing him like this.
He seemed so much more real. So much more vulnerable. Like this, he felt like he wasn’t anything other than mine.
Up till this moment, I’d only had one other night with him, and we hadn’t spent much of it sleeping. It’d also been over on his sofa rather than in the bed, so the little bit of sleep we had grabbed had been fleeting. I hadn’t known him then like I knew him now. I’d seen so many different facets of him since that time. All his complexities and the depth of his emotions.
The depth of his love for me.
I changed position carefully so I could get up, doing my best to not disturb him. My injuries left me feeling stiff and sore, so of course, my movements were awkward enough that I failed.
“You okay?” he muttered inarticulately, not really awake.
“I’m fine. Go back to sleep.”
I pulled myself up to my walker and padded barefoot to his restroom. After I finished, I edged over to Anna in her crib. She remained out, in the kind of unconcerned sleep only children can accomplish. She was such an adorable creature with her chubby pink cheeks. I wondered if our baby would have those same cheeks when it came into the world.
I hoped so.
Tara would never meet my baby. She’d never get to be the aunt she could’ve been.
Her graveside service would be held tomorrow, and while I wanted to honor her life, I didn’t know how I’d get through it. Luca had told me he’d be at my side the entire time, which should’ve comforted me. And it did to a certain extent. But nothing would bring her back. I still hadn’t gotten used to the idea of her being gone.
I didn’t want to get upset, so I attempted to push those thoughts away. I was only partially successful. I glanced down at my stomach and concentrated on what it’d be like to be as pregnant as the border patrol agent I’d met. She’d been glowing but also looked a bit miserable. I wondered what it would feel like, how I’d look. Guess I’d find out sooner rather than later.
I was about to head back to bed when I heard a noise. It reminded me of when someone threw a rock through a window. Luca must’ve heard it, too, because he opened his eyes blearily and sat up. “What was that?” he asked, and then we heard it again. Closer this time. He stood, a frown marring his features, as he stepped swiftly into his pants from the day before.
And then the entire house seemed to shimmy from the inside out, the bedroom door flying back on his hinges, as everything from lamps to Anna’s toys were thrown to the floor. A wave of heat came right after, bursting through the walls of the hallway. Smoke detectors went off, and I glanced up at Luca who was staring at me wide-eyed.
An explosion, I realized. Something in the house had exploded. Anna had just started to whimper from her crib when another explosion rocked the structure, this time from much closer by. The last one must’ve taken place on the first floor, and we were on the second. But now, something on our floor had exploded, too.
Anna’s whimpers increased in volume, so instinctively, I pulled her into my arms. It hurt my injuries to do it, but it didn’t matter. We had to get out. Luca had just reached us when yet another explosion hit, this time overhead. The ceiling buckled and a car-sized piece of it fell, narrowly missing Anna and me.
Coughing, I blinked through the dust and debris, feeling more heat. Flames. The mansion was on fire.
I looked over my shoulder for Luca—he’d just been right there—but he’d vanished. Panicked, I peered at the place he’d been to discover him on the floor, half of his leg pinned beneath the fragment of ceiling. A gash on the side of his face bled freely and his expression was rife with pain, but when I leaned down to assist him, he shouted at me.
“No, get out! Get yourself and Anna out!”
“I can’t leave you here,” I protested, but he waved his arms fiercely.
“Don’t worry about me. Just go!”
Torn, I didn’t know what to do. I knew I had to get Anna out, but Luca was injured and trapped. He kept tugging on his leg to free it, but so far, hadn’t managed to get loose. Anna was full out shrieking in my ear now, and I was trying to think of some solution that would work for all of us when Marco appeared at the door.
His muscle-bound frame was in nothing but black boxers, but I’d never been so glad to see him in my life. He took one look at the three of us and ordered me out into the hallway. “I’ve got Luca,” he promised. “Take Anna and meet me at the far end of the circle drive out front.”
I turned to leave but then hesitated at the threshold. Gripping under Luca’s arms, Marco yanked with all his strength, and I watched relieved as he dragged his brother along the floor, making visible progress. But just as Marco pulled him free, Luca cried out, and I gasped. Bone protruded through the skin of his shinbone, bleeding profusely. I’d never seen such a bad break.
Horrified, I took a step back toward them. With a grunt, Marco hauled Luca up over his shoulder in a firemen’s lift and saw me standing there. Nostrils flaring, Marco yelled at me, his tone almost vicious, “Goddammit, Molly! Get out of here!”
Satisfied that they’d make it out, I headed toward the staircase to go downstairs. The heat had intensified, making my pajamas feel like they were being melted like wax to my skin. I used the wall for support and went as fast as I could, but it felt like I was moving at a snail’s pace.
The smoke was getting thicker and thicker, and I pushed my pajama top over my mouth and held my sleeve up to Anna’s face to provide us with some sort of filter to breathe through. She continued to wail, but now her wails were punctuated by coughs, too. Despite the addition of our impromptu masks, we couldn’t help but choke on the toxic air.
The house had become a warzone.
Pieces of ceiling and other debris kept sifting down from the floor above, making me take a winding route to safety. I’d just reached the first floor when I saw it; one of the decorative columns adorning the entry way had fallen across the tile, blocking the main door. I knew there were other exits, but the denseness of the smoke meant I was having a hard time with visibility.
I twisted around to see if Marco and Luca were behind us, but they weren’t. Where had they gone?
Fire licked its way along the ceiling and the stairway behind me now, it’s yellow and orange flames consuming the wood of the banister and the drywall as if it were kindling. Going around the fallen marble column, I reached a bank of windows. Several of them had been blown out, probably from the repeated blasts, and I rushed toward them, my lungs constricting from the need for oxygen.
I made it outside, and a few feet from the exterior, the air seemed much clearer. I took in gulping breaths as I pushed on, pulling my pajama top down and moving my sleeve from the front of Anna’s tear-stained face. She hadn’t quit crying for even a second throughout the whole ordeal, but at least I knew she was still breathing.
I saw a group of shadows hovering in the distance, and I limped toward them, glad they too had gone to the far end of the circle driveway. Fire engine horns and sirens could be heard closing in on us, and soon the trucks appeared, their lights flaring.
When I reached everyone, I took inventory. Greta and Rosa were there, both fully dressed. Alessandro and Gabriel stood off to the side, both without shirts, as they each spoke loudly into their cell phones.
“Where’s Luca and Marco?” I asked as I approached, raising my voi
ce so I could be heard over Anna.
“We haven’t seen them,” Rosa said, her eyes never leaving the burning inferno that had been the Varasso mansion. Greta lived on the premises, but Rosa must’ve arrived recently to prepare an early breakfast. I was glad they were out, but I needed to know that Luca and Marco had also reached safety.
“Give her to me,” Greta said, putting out her arms to take the upset toddler. “Carrying her must be hard with your injuries.”
I let Anna go, then said, “But the guys were right behind me. Marco had to help Luca out from under a slab of the ceiling. Luca’s leg is badly broken, but Marco promised to get him out. He said he’d meet us here.”
“I’m sure they’re on their way then,” Rosa said touching my arm kindly, but her face remained afraid.
A woman firefighter approached us next, as other members of the brigade began to douse the blaze. “Did everyone get out? Is anyone missing?” she asked us.
“Luca and Marco Varasso haven’t made it over to us yet,” I said.
Greta added, “Francesca Salvatore is also missing.”
“All right. Everyone stay put. I’ll send some EMTs over to get you all some oxygen.”
I waited, thinking Marco’s bulky mass would show up any second with the man I loved slung across his back. But one minute passed and then two. Maybe it was Anna’s perpetual crying or maybe it was the cold fear that had seized my insides, but I began weeping, as well. And once I started, I couldn’t stop.
Rosa and Greta had tears streaking down their faces, as well, the moisture carving paths through the black soot that covered all of us from head to toe. A couple of ambulances arrived, and the paramedics put oxygen masks on our faces, telling us to breathe deep.
As hot as it had been inside the burning house, outside it was freezing. All of us started to shiver, and when a wind kicked up, it blew through me like an icy blade. The wind fed the fire, making flames shoot out of the windows on all three floors. The firefighters were forced back, and within moments, the whole building was consumed.
My silent tears became sobs, and I found I couldn’t stay on my feet. Someone caught me halfway down, but I had this horrible feeling. Though I didn’t want to give it voice, my mind kept coming to the same conclusion.
He and Marco should be here by now. And if they weren’t, that must mean…
But I couldn’t allow myself to believe that. After all we’d been through, I couldn’t lose Luca now. It wouldn’t be fair.
Yet I knew very well that life wasn’t always fair. In fact, it seldom was.
I stared at the architecture of the massive structure turned bright vengeful orange by ravaging flames and knew it heralded the end of an era. The end of the life the Varassos had built.
The end of my life as I’d come to know it.
I came to on a patch of frozen ground as a paramedic fussed over me, the oxygen mask still over my nose and mouth. I must’ve fainted. A male voice, Gabriel’s, carried over to me, the sound of it incensed. I concentrated my gaze on him, tuning in to what he was saying.
“This was an attack, plain and simple. I saw what came through the window. It was a grenade. Some asshole launched fucking grenades into our home. That’s military grade weaponry, so whoever this is should be easy to find. Be careful of the emergency assistance people, but if you see anyone suspicious, I want them captured. And if you can’t capture them, put a bullet in their brain.”
Alessandro’s voice then followed. “I’ve got two images from my motion detection app. The only person who got through was our usual delivery truck.” I looked over and saw him squinting as he tapped on his phone. He didn’t have his glasses. “And that person was Roman.”
I knew who Roman was. He was one of their runners, someone pretty low level. As soon as Alessandro mentioned his name, though, Gabriel spit in disgust, I’d never seen him so angry. “You think Roman is capable of all this? Isn’t his IQ like seventy or something?”
“I think so, but Marco suspected someone on the inside,” Alessandro said.
“But it doesn’t make sense. We need to know if anyone else had access,” Gabriel gesticulated jerkily as he talked, his voice growing sharper and more intense. “If there was any other way this could have happened. I mean, we had the whole area locked down tight. Now we’ve got two brothers missing, and…”
“Bro, I know,” Alessandro said, and I saw Gabriel lose it. His body shook for a second until he could get himself back together.
“We were prepared,” Gabriel bit out, his sorrow tinged by rage as he wiped his face with his fists. “We knew someone had snuck in under the radar. If it was Roman, we need to know precisely what he did. How he got a hold of a grenade launcher. How we didn’t see him coming.”
“You said it yourself, Gabriel,” I entered the conversation, my voice sounding way calmer than I felt, but my brain latched onto this excuse to problem solve. Applying logic felt a lot better than the useless weeping I’d done up till then. “We didn’t suspect him because he seems less than able. But if he was the only one who had access, it must be him.”
“I’ll beat him to death with my bare hands,” he said, and I agreed with his sentiment. I’d never committed murder before, but now I seriously considered it.
Everyone went quiet for a few minutes. The atmosphere was clouded by the horror of the situation, by the staggering amount of loss we were all feeling, and by the furious need we had for revenge. I felt desperate with it, with all of it.
I couldn’t breathe, but it wasn’t the smoke this time. It was the fear that I’d lost the love of my life. It was the fear that after finally getting to the place we needed to be, I’d lost him.
I’d lost Luca.
Suddenly, the radio of the paramedic hovering over me sprang to life. “We need two ambulances to the rear of the domicile. Two victims were just found stuck beneath a cave-in near the back entrance.”
I bolted upwards to a standing position, not even caring that my injuries screamed at me when I did. Gabriel and Alessandro seemed to be on the same page I was, and the three of us rushed back toward the mansion.
“I’m sorry,” the lady firefighter called out as we approached. The squad had put up a perimeter as they fought the blaze, and we would need to go right through it. “No one past this point.”
“You don’t understand,” I said at the same time that Gabriel said, “Those are our brothers.” But the woman wouldn’t budge.
“It’s too dangerous to allow anyone but emergency personnel beyond the perimeter.”
“Can you at least tell us if they’re all right?” I asked her.
“The only thing I can tell you right now is that they are both being assessed and will be taken to Jefferson Health.”
Through unspoken consensus Gabriel, Alessandro and I all struck off toward the mammoth Varasso garage, a building thankfully separate from the mansion. I scuttled into the back while Gabriel drove and Alessandro took the passenger seat, every one of us looking like we’d been through some harrowing battle.
I didn’t care how I looked, though. I’d spent the past hour terrified that the father of my child had died a horrific death, so the only thing I could concentrate on now was seeing him again.
38
Luca
My brothers and I had been exposed to our fair share of injuries. All four of us had been shot or at least grazed by a bullet. All four of us had taken a punch, oftentimes by another brother or even our father. So we understood that physical pain was just something you had to suck up and suffer through.
None of us had ever been burned, though. And I was discovering that burns needed to be listed in their own separate category. As the fire had eaten its way through the mansion, more and more of the structure itself kept trying to come down on us. We’d been blocked at every turn, and it was only through sheer luck that Marco made it to the back door.
Then everything had gone to shit.
We heard it before it happened. The house had been si
zzling and creaking like a damn barbecue or firepit, the smoke making us cough and gag. We’d heard a colossal crashing noise but hadn’t had the time to dodge it. The only reason we weren’t crushed like bugs was because two of the pieces had landed in a pyramid formation like a roof, leaving us just enough space to crouch in.
But the blaze had besieged us then. The walls that had fallen were already lit, the flames scooting across them like some living, breathing being. It might have been fascinating to watch had it not been our home the fire was devouring. Had everything about the circumstances not been so deadly.
Marco took the brunt of the cave-in. He’d had me on his back originally, and had he left me there, I’d almost certainly be dead. When we’d reached the back door, he’d thrown me down—none too gently—onto the floor. I think he’d been about to reposition me in his grip when the ceiling fell.
We’d been trapped.
There’d been an oriental rug situated beneath me, one our mother had purchased decades ago, and when it caught fire, my pant legs had gone up, too. My brother had managed to strip them off me, relegating my burns to mostly second degree or less. But he hadn’t been so fortunate. His back had been up against the fallen structure the entire time, and with nowhere to go, the best he could do was lay across me.
I knew his screams would haunt me for a long time to come.
I’d caught a glimpse of his back, and it’d been worse than anything I’d ever seen. If hell was a real place with these types of burns given as punishment, then I could understand why so many people chose to live a moral, upstanding life.
Christ.
Fortunately, we’d been on the stairway when Molly had gone through the front window with Anna. If I hadn’t known they’d gotten out safely this whole time, I’d have likely lost my mind.
