It was hard enough being a young female lawyer in Manhattan without having your clerks and interns… even the firm’s partners wondering what might be wrong with you.
She’d taken the dumping pretty well, Alice thought. In public at least. No emotional scenes. No bawling out her woes in the break room. Her caseload had even increased. The only person in the public eye who’d been privy to even the tiniest emotional break had been the girl at Starbucks who served her that first Pumpkin Spice Latte of the season two months ago. She’d met Justin in the line waiting for one four years before.
“On your left.”
An octogenarian couple shuffled slowly along, hand in hand. What would it be like to find a love like that? To still want to hold hands and be together after so many years? Would she ever know? Would she ever have the chance?
Could she ever take the chance again?
She’d hidden her upset from the world these past months. The only person who’d really seen firsthand how devastated she’d been had been her grandmother. Thank God for Gran. Her wise words and comforting presence had taken away much of the sting from her heart. It was, Gran explained, the Chanler pride that was harder to overcome.
Gran’s solution was to find another man. Not to throw her achievement in her fiancé’s face, but to heal herself from the inside out. Fill her up so fully she didn’t have time to think about it.
Like it was just that easy.
“On your left.”
The lone man ahead didn’t even look back as most people did. He just shifted to the right and kept trudging along. Since the path ahead was clear, Alice swerved farther to the left as a courtesy to pass him… and nearly had her arm wrenched from its socket when Nanny stopped unexpectedly. The sudden stop of the upper half of her body took her feet out from under her. She spun about and stumbled back, landing on her knee and hand hard.
A combination of a grunt and moan escaped her along with a muttered curse. She’d hit so hard her earbuds had popped right out of her ears and were now swinging like a pair of out of sync pendulums. Alice started to push herself to her feet.
“I’ve got you.” Strong male hands finished the job for her, lifting her upright as if she weighed nothing and setting her back on her feet. “Are you hurt?”
It wasn’t the words but the voice that caught her interest. Deep and rich, tinged with just a hint of an Irish accent. It was at once both soothing and alluring. The face that went with it was just as enticing. He was probably in his mid-thirties. Rugged, his square jaw darkened by a few day’s growth of beard and with a nose that might have been broken a time or two. He was gorgeous but it was his eyes that held her attention. Eyes as blue as the winter sky, pale and… well, not icy exactly, but barren, as if one were on a frozen tundra incapable a supporting life. Desolate. Sad.
She was staring and she knew it, but the contrast between them and his dark eyelashes and thick dark brows was so mesmerizing, she couldn’t look away. Nor could she catch her breath. It was because she’d been running, she told herself. There could be no other reason.
“Are you hurt?” he asked once more.
“Uh, no.” Forcing her gaze away, she brushed the tiny pebbles embedded in the gloves away and shook her head. “No, I’m fine. Thanks.”
“That’s a big dog for such a tiny woman.”
“I get that a lot.” She shot Nanny a look of reprimand. “Normally, she’s very well behaved. She’s never done that before. I can’t imagine what’s gotten into her.”
Nanny was ignoring her glare and straining against the leash as if she were trying to get closer to nothing at all. Her tail wagged merrily as if she’d caught sight or scent of a squirrel. Glancing back up at the man, Alice’s breath caught at the back of her throat, but she managed to clear it away. “Anyway, thanks again.”
“No problem.”
Turning, Alice tugged on Nanny’s leash but to her surprise, the dog plopped her butt down and refused to move. As the man had said, she was a big dog and Alice wasn’t much past five feet tall. If the dog didn’t want to move, she couldn’t physically force her.
“Nanny! Come!”
The dog looked back at Alice beseechingly but didn’t budge. She just sat there wagging her tail.
“Well-behaved, huh?”
There was some humor in that honeyed burr now, but she didn’t dare a look to see how it was reflected in those fascinating eyes.
“Nanny!” There was more than a hint of warning in her tone and with a high-pitched whine, the dog reluctantly got to her feet and returned to her side.
Triumphant, she slid him one last glance and resumed her course, pushing her earbuds back into her ears before picking up speed. The path curved ahead around the Lake and she looked back. He was still watching her. Just before a stand of trees took him out of sight, he lifted a hand in farewell.
Chapter 2
“Gran,” she called, pulling her key from the lock in a practiced move as she pushed the door open of her Upper West Side apartment. “I’m back.”
“Did you have a nice run, dear?” Gran was in her rocking chair as usual, staring out the windows looking east out over Central Park.
“I might’ve if Nanny hadn’t gotten all crazy and come to a dead stop in the middle of the trail.” Alice pulled off her gloves, checking her hands for any abrasions before tugging off her beanie and slipping off her hoodie. With the early December weather holding in the mid-forties, it was all the extra layers she’d needed. “You should’ve seen it, Gran. She yanked me right off my feet.”
“That’s not at all like her.” Gran held out her hand to Nanny, who gave her a sniff before dropping down at her feet.
“I know, right?”
“Anything exciting happen while you were out?”
Alice pulled a bottle of water out of the fridge and took a long drink, thinking about her answer. It’d been the first jolt of real attraction she’d felt for a man in more than six months, but she didn’t want to mention it. Not because she didn’t want to tell her grandmother. She told Gran everything. But for some reason, she didn’t want to share that moment. Not just yet. It was too fresh and new. “No.”
Gran sighed as if she were disappointed. “I was just hoping… Alice dear, you really need to start getting out more.”
Again? “I was just out, Gran,” she pointed out. Dropping down into a chair opposite her grandmother’s rocker, she slid off her running shoes and lifted the leg of her pants to examine her knee. A bit of a scrape and a little blood, but nothing too bad. Luckily it hadn’t torn her favorite running pants.
“Not running. But out. You need to start seeing people again. Your friends,” she clarified before Alice could argue. “Not clients. Not coworkers. Not just faces you pass on the streets. I worry about you, dear.”
“I know you do, but I’ve told you a thousand times, there’s nothing to worry about. I had lunch with Chloe just the other day…”—more like a week ago—“…and remember I went to the movies with Benny and Laura last week.”
“Two weeks ago,” Gran pointed out. “You can’t keep pulling away from them. From life like this.”
Alice pulled a face after looking away from the older woman, of course. There were some things one just didn’t do to their grandmother and one was make a nasty face. “I’m fine.”
Gran snorted at that. Just as she did every other of the thousand times Alice insisted she was fine. “You should get out. It’s Christmas.”
“Christmas is still weeks away. Besides, you know how I hate to leave you here all alone.”
“Marshall can come over and keep me company.
She laughed at that. “My brother acts like you’re not even here. And he never comes around any more. Besides, I am getting out. I’ve got that charity ball in a couple weeks remember? The firm bought two tables.”
“Bah, you’re only going to that because they’re making you.” Gran pushed her rocker into motion and studied Alice with her caring brown eyes until she bega
n to squirm. “You need to get out and have fun. You can’t spend the rest of your life holed up here with me, sulking.”
Alice opened her mouth to issue the expected rebuttal but bit her lip. No, she wasn’t going to do it. She wasn’t going to have another argument about the same old thing yet again. “Can we change the subject?”
“You need a man,” Gran insisted.
Those pale blue eyes popped back into her mind but she shook the vision away. “No, what I need is a break.”
Shut down, it was Gran’s turn to sulk a bit. “You could at least go out long enough to get me some of those hot roasted chestnuts they sell down on the street.”
“Chestnuts?” She laughed. “Gran, you couldn’t even eat them.”
“I like the smell,” she said defensively. “Did you know, when I was a little girl we’d play a game where we’d carve our initials into the kernels and toss them in the fire. The first one to pop would get a wish. We could play that.”
“So you can wish for me to ‘find a man’?” she asked, with a wry grin. “I know all your ploys, Gran. It won’t work.”
“Can’t blame an old woman for trying.”
Alice stood and dropped a kiss on her Gran’s forehead. “Yes, I can. I’m going to take a shower. Love you.”
“I love you, too.”
* * *
Alice draped the garment bag over her arm and pushed open the door to Macy’s. Herald Square was packed with people, which wasn’t unusual but the Christmas season brought even more people out of the woodwork. The air was filled with all the normal New York din; yells, voices, sirens and honking cars. Lots of honking cars. That’s why she didn’t drive. She didn’t want to become one of them and add to the chaos.
The air was also filled with smells, some pleasant and some not so much, but among them were the smells of hot dogs and chestnuts roasting. One reminded her she’d forgotten lunch yet again and the other of her Gran. It’d serve the old lady right if she did bring home some of the nuts. She’d only wish she could eat them despite her argument to the contrary.
“Should we get a cab and grab lunch?” Chloe asked, carrying her own load of shopping bags.
“I’d love to but I need to get back home.”
“For what?” her friend asked, pursing her lips pointedly. “Come on, Al.”
“Next time. I promise.”
“Fine, but I’ll hold you to it.”
They hugged tight. “Thanks for coming shopping with me,” Alice said, pulling away. “I love the dress.”
“I have great taste.”
Chloe went off to hail a cab and on impulse, Alice pushed her way through the crowd. She made her way to the chestnut vendor and paid far too much for the little bag. Being denied anything more than their fragrant aroma would be just the right amount of payback for Gran’s persistent meddling in Alice’s love life.
The swarm of shoppers jostled her from all sides on the congested sidewalk. Even a gorgeous Sunday during the Christmas season couldn’t have conjured such a mob on its own. What was it? Oh, everyone was trying to get a glimpse of the Macy’s holiday window. The store was famous for them, each year trying to outdo their previous display. She used to love coming to see them each year with Gran. It had been a tradition of theirs, celebrating a traditional New York Christmas: shopping together, seeing the Nutcracker, watching the tree lighting at Rockefeller center and checking out the windows. Just as Gran had done as a girl.
She hadn’t even thought to take a peek this year. The events of the last year had really ruined the season for her. Not just Justin but the loss of her parents last winter.
Maybe it was time to restart those traditions again. She could snap a picture of the display for Gran. She would love that.
It took a while to work her way to the front of the crowd. The window was lovely as usual but this one struck her harder than most. A winter wedding scene with a bride dressed in a gown of frosty snowflakes and white feathers rotating in the arms of her fairy tale prince. They glided across an icy dance floor with a white and silver backdrop of ice crystals, twinkling lights and more snowflakes.
It was magical.
A pair of red-mittened hands pressed flat on the glass next to her and Alice looked down to see a little girl pressing her freckled nose against the window. Her big blue eyes were wide with wonder. It reminded her of a time not so long ago when she’d done the same. “It’s pretty, isn’t it?”
The girl nodded silently, her auburn ponytail bouncing with the motion, and grinned up at her with a broad smile. Given the absence of several teeth, Alice figured she must be around six or seven years old. She was adorable.
They looked back through the window as one. Alice examined the finer details of the display for a few moments more before pulling her phone from her pocket and snapping a couple pictures. Then she recorded a few seconds of video so her grandmother could see how the figures moved as well.
Around them, the crowd shifted and was replaced by new sets of eyes to look with awe on the spectacle. Lingering, she looked about for the adult that should be hovering over the little girl but could see no one paying her any attention. She frowned. A crowded street in New York wasn’t the place to let your child roam free. A few minutes longer, but still no one came to fetch the girl.
“Is your mommy around?” Alice asked.
The little girl shook her head sadly and Alice felt a jolt of panic. “Your daddy?”
She nodded then, her blue eyes lighting up and she pointed to the right. Alice followed the finger with her eyes but quickly looked away when she spotted the man standing at the far edge of the window. It was the man from the park! He was wearing the same lightweight jacket he’d worn a few days before, the same beanie covering his head. Still wonderfully gorgeous. She hadn’t just imagined it the other day.
Nor had she imagined how attractive she found him.
Studying the window display, he hadn’t seen her but Alice blushed anyway. Then inwardly berated herself for it. Why? Why was she blushing? She was twenty-nine years old for crying out loud. Way beyond such adolescent behavior. Besides, she’d only sprawled like a fool at his feet. That was nothing to be embarrassed about. Right?
It had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he was dazzling. Or that she found him attractive. Any woman would as a point of simple aesthetic admiration. The same way one looked at a fine sculpture and sighed in appreciation. That was it. And it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that her breath caught again. Or that her pulse picked up just a notch. Or that her toes curled inside her boots at the sight of him.
Alice shook her head. Maybe Gran was right. She did need a man if only for one purpose. She wasn’t such a fool as to think she’d put her heart on the line again for anything more.
The little girl slipped through the space between the crowd and the window toward him. Stopping halfway, she turned back and waved at Alice to come with her but she only shook her head and gestured for her to continue.
Divorce rates may be high in America, but if he had a daughter that age, tall dark and gorgeous was probably married. It would serve nothing to encourage an attraction that couldn’t go any farther.
With a wave goodbye, Alice slipped out of the crowd and found a place at the curb to hail a taxi.
Chapter 3
Her mind refused to focus. Despite her inward reproach, she’d been as distracted as a schoolgirl doodling hearts on a notebook over her first crush. She’d been embarrassingly unproductive all week. The upside was when jogging through the park all week, the chaotic ramblings usually flitting through her mind had faded away in favor of one thought.
Him. Whoever he was.
She hadn’t seen him again, though it hadn’t stopped her from looking. Even jogging farther and longer in hopes of passing him by. What she’d do or not do if she did was still in question. He was a complication she didn’t need or want right now. Especially if he was married. Having lost a man to ‘the other woman’, she refused t
o become one.
Alice ran east into the park today. From the apartment she shared with Gran on West 72 through Strawberry Fields, she then headed east toward the Bethesda Fountain. The park was crowded today with people taking advantage of yet another mild day. Kids were playing, screams of joy echoing in her ears as she approached Pilgrim Hill. One of the best slopes in the park, it was sure to be packed on a day like this.
Nanny’s ears pricked up and she towed Alice in that direction. Letting the dog have her way, she followed along. There was a throng of children and adults at the top of the hill, waiting for their turns. Sleds from plastic discs, to inner tubes, to old school toboggans were held at the ready. To her surprise, Nanny didn’t stop there, but nose to the ground, sniffed her way through the crowd. With a yip of excitement, she surged forward dragging her owner behind.
“What the hell, Nanny!” Alice said, stumbling after the big, unruly mutt.
Nanny didn’t give an inch until she dropped down on to her haunches, nose-to-nose with a little girl. They grinned at each other as if they were old friends.
“Hello.” She flashed her gap-tooth smile at Alice.
“Well, hello again.”
“You remember me?”
“Why, of course, I do,” she assured the all-too-familiar child scratching the dog’s ears fondly with red-mittened hands. “Did you like the Macy’s window?”
“Oh, yes.” The girl nodded. “The bride was so pretty. Daddy liked the spindly snowmen in the back. Did you see them?”
“Yes, I did.” Unconsciously, Alice was already scanning the surrounding crowd lining the sloping sides of Pilgrim Hill. “Is he here with you today?”
“Yes, he’s down there watching my cousins sledding.” She pointed and Alice followed her finger. Her breath caught in her throat yet again as she saw the man leaning back against one of the trees near the top of the hill, his arms crossed over his chest.
Would she ever stop doing that at the sight of him?
Spirits of the Season: Eight Haunting Holiday Romances Page 11
