As we sat there trying to make sense of things, Zeke suddenly started yelling at Randall.
“This is your fault! If you hadn’t lied none of this would have happened. The lie you told made him collapse. If he hadn’t been in the hospital, his dad wouldn’t have even met me. I wouldn’t have gotten shot and Jazz would be here now. I hope you are satisfied.”
“I know I was wrong, but I don’t feel bad that Jazz is gone. You deserve better than that common street thug! After all of this time I thought I was over my feelings for you, but I was wrong. When I saw you again, I realized I am still in love with you and I am not apologizing for that, not to you Alton, not to anyone.”
“Randall you keep saying I deserve better than Jazz. What makes you think Jazz isn’t the best? You don’t even know him obviously my criteria are different from yours. Money doesn’t make someone the best; it’s what’s in their heart. Jazz has more heart than anyone I’ve ever been with.” Zeke said.
“Zeke you can’t tell me that you don’t feel anything for me. If I had pushed harder, I could have had you that night a few weeks ago.”
“Randall I had a teenage crush on you years ago but I am grown now. I no longer hold the infatuated notions of an immature teenager. You stepped back into my life as a high-powered, rich attorney and expected me to gasp and swoon and I didn’t. After 8 years I wouldn’t expect you to flip over me either.”
“So now we get to the real issue. You are still mad at me for leaving for law school.” Randall responded to Zeke.
They were talking over my head because none of it was making sense. I just stayed quiet and figured I’d eventually find out what the hell was going on.
“Randall please do us all a favor and get over yourself!”
“Why would he be mad at you for that Randall, you were doing you?” I asked confusedly.
“When I went to law school I didn’t come to town as often to see him. I used to come all the time just to see Zeke, you just didn’t know about it.”
“You did that after I told you not to? This is exactly why. Because of what is happening right now.”
“No Alton I would just come hang out with him because I knew he liked me and I liked him too..”
“It’s so nice how you both chose what was best for me without ever consulting me.”
“Zeke, I knew the Randall you didn’t. You would have ended up getting hurt in the long run. He was a straight up ho.” I said.
Zeke said he was going in his room to “reflect” on the situation with Jazz. Randall had to go back to court. I stayed with Zeke and told Randall I’d call Rachel to come pick me up. I know I can’t protect Zeke from the world but I think I do a pretty good job.
Nadiah
After 6 months I finally accepted the reality that Alton had moved on. It was time for me to get out and mingle. I went out to Club Zero to dance a little, flirt a little, drink a little, and do a little of whatever else I wanted to. It didn’t take long for someone to approach me. A slight wiggle of my hips and a sensuous lick of my lips was all it took to make men flock to me like bees to nectar. As I stood at the bar bobbing my head to the music, a man walked up behind me and pressed his hand against the small of my back.
“Excuse me, may I buy you a drink? What’ll you have?”
“A cosmopolitan please. Thank you. I’m Nadiah and you are?”
“Oh everybody calls me Anthony.”
Most men that come up to me in a bar are usually so obnoxious that they turn me off as soon as they open their mouth. Things were different with this man. His good looks didn’t hurt his case a bit. I could sense an air of aggression in him. He had a natural ability to take command of a situation, which was an instant turn on. Alton could assert that type of control when he needed to but it wasn’t something that was normal. Alton was just too easy going for me. I appreciate a power struggle for control between a man and woman.
“I noticed you when you walked in. I was hoping you would take a seat here so I could at least buy you a drink.”
“Oh?”
“It’s the truth. You are one of the finest…. No “THE” finest woman in here.”
“Thanks. You are quite handsome yourself.”
“So tell me what a woman as beautiful as you is doing out by herself on a Saturday?”
“You know I could ask you the same question. Why is such a handsome man as you out by himself tonight?”
“That’s fair. I am just getting back into the dating scene after a divorce.”
“I can relate. I am a recent divorcee as well.”
“I see, well let’s make a pact to avoid discussing our exes.”
“I can do that easily.”
After the initial banter he escorted me out to the dance floor. He moved his body rhythmically to the music. He had a sexy natural rhythm in the way he moved. When a slow song came on he firmly grabbed my hand and placed his arm around my waist. He was aggressive but gentle at the same time. As some of the other couples around us substituted dry humping for dancing my new suitor remained respectful. I found myself really drawn to this man more and more.
“What do you say we get out of here and get a bite to eat?”
"Sounds good to me.”
His presence commanded attention wherever he went. I was very attracted to the strength he radiated. From his style, his sexy stroll, even the sexy way he licked his lips when he spoke, I loved it all. He didn’t handle me as if I were a fragile piece of china. He wasn’t rough, but he wasn’t too soft either. He was aggressively gentle. We clicked instantly and things took off at jet speed.
It happened so quickly between us I didn’t have time for fear or doubts to kick in. I think what I appreciated more than anything was that he did not pressure me to have sex. I found that a refreshing change from my usual experiences when I decided to start dating again. We were so much alike it was scary. Neither of us were particularly romantic either.
After dinner one Friday night Anthony said he needed to talk to me about something on his mind.
“Nadiah I never thought we would end up getting so close so fast. I do think we need to discuss what we are looking for.”
“I agree.”
“As you know I was married. I never liked being single. When I date it is always with the intention of finding something long term.”
“Well, as you know I was married too, but it isn’t my intention to jump out of one marriage into another one.”
“So are you saying you want to see other people?”
“No, I like what we have and I like you.”
“So I guess what I am trying to ask is if we can be exclusive with each other and just see how it works out?”
“Well Ant I think that is the obvious next step don’t you?”
“I do I was just hoping you would too.”
“Well good then it’s settled.”
I was happy that he brought up the topic because I had been thinking about it but didn’t want to seem needy. Things happened fast but it felt right. Happiness has always proven to be a fleeting emotion with me. I had no reason to expect this time to be any different. It had been too perfect and I expected something bad to happen, but nothing did. Fate threw a curveball the day after we had made our relationship official. I received a call on my cell phone and the voice on the other end caught me by surprise since I hadn’t spoken to her in months.
“Hello?”
“Hey Nadiah do you know who this is?”
“Yes of course I know. How have you been?”
“Miserable without you.”
“Oh really? I couldn’t tell since I haven’t heard from you in forever.”
“Because you said you never wanted to talk to me again and I was trying to respect that but I couldn’t take it any longer.”
“Well I’ve moved on to someone else. You missed your chance.”
“Since when has that stopped you? You know what we had is once in a lifetime. Did I mean anything at all to you?”
“Did I mean anything to you Ingrid? Other than a meal ticket, that is? You thought you were going to really have a windfall by being with me after I left Alton. That’s why you fought so hard to get me to leave him. That makes me feel like you only wanted me for the money.”
“That’s not true and you know it.”
“Ingrid I am less of a fool than you think I am. You can keep doing what you have been doing for the past 6 months without me. Lose my number too. Keep doing you. You had dollar signs in your eyes. I was nothing but a cash cow to you. Well no one uses me, especially not a dyke, so step off.”
“I’m not Alton, you better watch how you talk to me.”
“Or what? You certainly won’t whip my ass.”
“You sure this is how you want to leave things?”
“Yep.”
“I can show you better than I can tell you.”
“Whatever bitch. Goodbye!”
“You’ll be sorry Nadiah I promise you!”
“I’m sorry already!” I yelled as I quickly pressed my end key and turned my phone off.
Fifteen
Ezekiel Nelson
Six months after Jazz walked out of my life I was still just as depressed as I was when he left. I felt guilty about talking Alton’s ear off because he was in a new relationship with Rachel. I handled my grief the best I could by myself. I was so upset with Randall I told him that I hated him and never wanted to see him again. Randall didn’t take my words to heart and I was so glad he didn’t because he became my rock.
After seeing how heartbroken I was he really understood that I honestly loved Jazz. It was even harder to get over because a lot of Jazz’s things were still there. Many nights I would grab a shirt he’d worn, place it to my face, and inhale his scent as I cried myself to sleep longing for him. As time went on the wound didn’t heal it just went numb as I grew accustomed to the pain. I’d vowed to never allow a man to get to me like Jamal had. I knew I needed to deal with my feelings before trying to move on to another relationship. Randall respected that I needed time and didn’t try to move me along faster than I could go. At least with Jamal I had a reason to be angry and I left him. Jazz left me and it left me more confused than angry.
I’d held on to the dream of Jazz coming back long enough. It was time to reacquaint myself with the world. I’d made the decision to pull out of my self-imposed rut, when I was smacked in the face by reality. Randall was in town and on his way to my house from the airport. I tightened up my fade, shaved, and hopped in the shower to be ready when he got there. We had plans to go to dinner when he got to my house.
As I stood in my mirror going over my goatee and checking my appearance one last time, my doorbell rang. At the very moment I opened the door I heard Jazz’s voice loud and clear on the radio, totally catching me off guard. When the hook of the song came I thought I would just die. As the words of the hook played through my stereo speakers my eyes filled with tears.
“You are my everything, my everything is you. This love I have will always be true.” The voice sang.
Those words took me back to a place I was fighting so hard to move past.
“What’s wrong Zeke?” Randall asked.
I couldn’t respond. I just looked at him and shook my head.
Randall listened to the song closely and when the hook came the second time, he looked at me.
“That’s you isn’t it? On the radio?”
“Yes, I did the hook for Jazz. I remember singing the lyrics with my all because I really felt them.”
Just as I answered Randall’s question the DJ said the name of the artist as the song came to an end.
“That’s the hot new jam by new hip hop sensation, Slade featuring Zeke Nelson. Slade is in the studio with us to talk about the new song and take some questions. The lines are open, so give us a call at …” The DJ said.
“So Slade what’s up man? This new song is fire! It seemed to just blow up overnight. Did you think it would catch on this fast?”
“I thought it was hot and I just prayed that the people would think so too. I am definitely shocked and happy the song is doing so well. I wanna also say thanks for having me on the show today man.”
“A lot of people can relate to this song, which talks about how you sometimes have to leave the person you love. Is there a personal basis for the song?”
“There is. It was the inspiration for the song. I had to let my baby go and I regret it but felt I had no choice. It hurts everyday too.”
“Well sometimes heartbreak can lead to some of the best songs. I’m sure some of our listeners wanna know if this means you are back on the market?”
“Well right now I am single but I am just concentrating on my music and giving myself a break from the love thing. That’s not to say if I meet the right person I’ll just pass em by.”
“You heard it from the man himself ladies. So if you want to get at this brother then call in and let him know. So Slade if that special someone who inspired the song is listening what would you say?”
“Oh wow there is so much I would say. I can’t just pour my heart out right now but I’d definitely say I love you baby, I miss you, and I’m going crazy without you.”
“Aww, you heard him ladies he even has a sensitive side. It sounds like there is some unfinished business there though.”
“You’re still in love with him huh?” Randall asked me.
I tried to answer Randall’s question but only tears came out. He placed his arms around me and tried to comfort me. The truth was, no one could comfort me. The void Jazz left was not just in my heart, it was in my soul. Jazz and I knew each other so well. I felt like he somehow knew I was listening. It’s weird the way we were so connected, but we were. Whenever something happened to one of us, the other could feel it instantly.
After hearing the song and the interview I wasn’t in the mood to go out but I forced myself to go anyway. I was due to be in California in 2 days. I thought how blessed I was and that I should have been on cloud 9, but instead I was depressed over something I obviously couldn’t change.
“Randall I haven’t told anyone but Alton, but you know the movie I’m going to be in?”
“Yeah, what’s new with that?”
“I am going to Cali on Saturday. I have some promotional events to attend and then shooting starts next Wednesday.”
“That’s great. Are you excited?”
“I am not as excited as I should be.”
“It’s Jazz isn’t it?”
“I can’t get over him Randall.”
Randall didn’t respond he just held me tighter. I ended up crying myself to sleep in his arms.
Jazz
With a hit song in heavy rotation on the radio, I should have been the happiest man on the planet. I finally managed to get thoughts of Zeke down to about 100 times a day instead of the 1000 times I thought about him at first. Since Marlena’s label was making money from my single, I thought I was in the clear until she flipped back into Cougar mode. She requested me to be at her house at 7 P.M. on a Friday night. Although I resented it with every fiber of my being, I went to Marlena’s house. The closer I got the angrier I got, but figured if I just gave her what she wanted she would fall back. As I stood at the door waiting for her to answer, the thought of what I was about to do replayed over and over in my mind. I had second thoughts and started to walk away when she opened the door.
“Well Hello! I know you weren’t about to leave? Come on in.”
My body tensed as I followed her into the house.
“Would you like a drink?”
“No thanks.”
“Relax will you?”
“Don’t tell me to relax. You are despicable.”
“And what am I doing?”
“Holding my career hostage and requiring sex as the ransom.”
“Oh grow up.” She flippantly replied.
“You know Marlena I could have dealt with you threatening me. Zeke didn’t deserve for you drag
him into this. I’m only trying to protect him.”
“What does he have that makes people so crazy about him? I swear if I hear his name again I’m gonna go crazy!”
“Let’s get it over with already.”
“I wish you would loosen up a little.” She said.
“I’m not down with this. I hate ever meeting you. Now, let’s get this over with.”
“Follow me.”
She took me by the hand to lead me to her bedroom. I snatched my hand away.
“I can walk you don’t have to lead me.”
When we got to the bedroom I didn’t waste any time. I undressed unceremoniously. As she undressed, I looked away and stroked myself to get hard, betraying my true feelings. Her attempts at seduction were a waste of time. She walked up to me and started to kiss my neck, still determined.
“Please don’t.” I said, pushing her away.
Just having her so close to me made my erection die.
“Let me make this clear. I am only a dick to you. That’s what you want and that’s all you get. I got it hard it’s up to you to keep it that way.” I said.
She straddled my body and lowered herself down. As much as I hated to admit it she did have a nice body. Once I was able to view her as a body without a head then I was cool. I lay there motionless as she used me like a workhorse. Her moans and cries were like grinding salt in an open wound. I hated that she got so much pleasure from it.
“Damn will she finish already?” I thought to myself. As the minutes ticked by, it dawned on me that she was in control of her own pleasure. I was just lying there doing nothing.
“She can keep this going forever. I’m gonna get this over with.” I thought to myself.
Without warning, I grabbed her around the waist and flipped her over. She wanted it so I decided to give it to her and put my all into it. I knew she would try to play it off when I hit the spot, but I brought my A game. After a few deep, circular thrusts, her body tightened up. I grabbed her right leg and pushed it up onto my shoulder and went for the gold. I tapped that ass with no mercy. My frustration over the situation fueled my strokes. She moaned loudly as sweat poured from my body onto hers. Finally she latched onto me and locked her body around mine.
Get Somebody New Page 22
