by Leela Ash
The project suddenly took on a crushing weight, and Layne felt her breath quicken as her chest became tight with anxiety. There were so many steps to take and not very many chances for her to take them. They would have to leave as soon as possible, and that meant her comfortable little life with Jax would soon be uprooted once again. She wasn’t going to take no for an answer. And all that Jax would say was no. So she just wasn’t going to ask.
A muffled cry of pleasure reached their bedroom and Layne sighed. Apparently Sam was coping with their plan about as well as she was. Layne had taken Sam aside right before it was time for her to go to bed and they both silently agreed that this was going to be their last night at the homestead without any useful supplies. As her doctor, Sam wouldn’t let Layne do anything too strenuous just within a matter of months, and it was already risky enough as it was. But they would have to get to it now before it was too late.
Layne wanted to turn to Jax. She wanted to kiss his sleeping face and trace the peaceful lines of his mouth. But if she faced him before she left that night, she knew she wouldn’t be able to stomach the thought of leaving him. There was nothing she would be able to do to convince him that she was capable of handling this adventure on her own. Although it broke her heart to leave him, there was no other option if she was going to protect her family.
***
A few hours later, Layne would have guessed it was about three in the morning judging by the time that the world she once knew used to keep, there came a quiet rap on the door. Layne slipped out of bed and dressed quickly, careful not to wake Jax or make too much noise. She sat down at her desk for a moment, her legs feeling like jelly, and scribbled a quick note.
We’re off to save the world.
Layne had to bite back a startling wave of nausea before she rose again. She reached into the open closet and grabbed the bag she had stuffed full of her supplies and a change of clothes. Finally, she took a deep breath and opened the bedroom door.
The house was dark, and she could hear the gentle snoring of Tobi in the other room. Layne wrung her hands nervously and stood facing Sam, whose rich brown skin was lined with wrinkles of worry that weren’t usually there.
“Let’s get the hell out of here,” Sam whispered grimly.
Layne put her hand on Sam’s shoulder and they slipped out the back door, as quietly as possible. Layne had considered taking the rifle with them, but she didn’t want to leave Jax and Tobi defenseless in the house. Instead, she had made sure to pocket her slingshot and a few of the sharpest knives that they had, and she knew that Sam had an arsenal of her own that they could work with if the need ever arose.
A shiver of dread snaked up Layne’s spine. It was an odd feeling to be heading out into the most dangerous territories. They had been safe for so long that she had fooled herself into thinking that danger wouldn’t be able to follow them anymore. But that wasn’t true. Although she had come to believe that Jax would always be there for her no matter what, there was the disconcerting fact to consider that she was only able to believe that because they had gotten so spoiled. Layne was taking their time together for granted. She had no idea when the shit was going to hit the fan, and if she knew anything about the new world they were living in, it was that shit hit the fan exactly when you least expected it. Nothing went wrong until you were exactly the most vulnerable that you were ever going to be.
“You okay?” Sam whispered, glancing over at Layne. They hadn’t made it out of the garden yet, and already it was clear that they were both having second thoughts.
Layne wanted to answer but she didn’t have any words for what she was feeling. Her mouth felt dry and clammy and she swallowed hard, wondering if they were making the biggest mistake of their lives. Maybe it would be all right. Maybe the baby would grow up healthy and strong with an immunity that it received from both of its parents. They could just go back in the house like nothing had ever happened and the world would be all right.
But that wasn’t a guarantee. And they had a chance to make sure that the future was guaranteed.
“You know where the camp is?” Layne finally asked.
Sam nodded.
“I have my compass and the map I made while we were living in Hex. Some of those guys were batshit crazy, but they were good at scavenging and holding onto the important things. I know I ended up losing track of a lot of that stuff just trying to survive.”
Layne knew all too well exactly what Sam meant. When the virus first swept across the world, she had been part of a tribe of doctors and scientists that swore they would be the hand of God working among men to cure them of the virus. She had put serious thought and consideration into how the virus worked and sat beside some brilliant minds working in an attempt to collect the proper knowledge that would be necessary in saving the world.
But one by one, the brilliant minds fell prey to the sick world around them. They were either driven crazy by their own obsession to find a cure that seemed further and further away from them, or they were killed outright by the violence of the apocalyptic disasters befalling the nation. Soon, the only people left were those who had joined the group as a way to assuage their guilt or pretend that they had more knowledge and use than they really had. Most of them were posers and fakes, only pretending to care when all they wanted was prestige from the few remaining people left on Earth.
Layne hoped with all she had that the tribe they were seeking out would be different and none were pretentious, thoughtless morons. They had surely disbanded by then, she thought to herself. Layne hadn’t been able to tolerate their bullshit. Not after one of them had almost gotten everybody in their tribe killed just to try to prove a point.
“Layne?”
Sam’s voice broke into her thoughts and Layne looked over at her friend, unable to hide her frustration any longer. She had told Sam a little bit about those people, and what had happened to drive her away. But the rest was just too infuriating. To humiliating. She hadn’t even told the whole story to Jax.
“Do you need some water?”
Sam pulled out her thermos and offered it to Layne.
“You don’t have to baby me just because I’m pregnant,” Layne grumbled. Thinking about her past always put her in a bad mood. She patted her abdomen. She had recently begun to show. Would the baby be a boy or a girl?
Layne cut off the thought. She couldn’t let herself think carelessly about a future she didn’t know was even certain.
“I’m not babying you, I was just being friendly.” Sam sighed, taking a long swig of her water. Layne wanted to apologize, but she was too tired. They had to get as far as they possibly could on foot before Jax found out they were gone. As soon as he knew they were missing, he would try to track them down and he would just get himself into trouble.
“Maybe we should have told them what we were doing. And why,” Layne said.
A pained sigh escaped Sam’s lips and Layne turned her eyes on her friend. They had both been tortured about the choice for days on end. Every time they met up to talk about finding a cure, they also talked about how it might make their partners feel if they were involved in the conversation. Both Layne and Sam had agreed that Jax and Tobi had suffered enough loss for a lifetime, and talking about a cure at this point would seem like too little, too late. It might even cause them to fall into a depression if they were reminded too often of the pain that had been needlessly inflicted onto their lives because of the virus.
“I just don’t think that if we let them in on it, that the conversation would have gotten this far,” Sam said quietly. “Tobi and I are really close. I love her. So don’t get me wrong. But if she doesn’t understand something, she just dismisses it. And she isn’t a scientific thinker. She’s hands on, you know? A builder. She would blow it all off and make us feel like we were crazy for hoping or wanting to try.”
“I feel terrible,” Layne admitted. “I can’t believe I just left him like that.”
“I know. I feel that way too.” Sam s
ighed, looking down at the dark ground in front of them. “But if we told them, it would have been one conversation. And yeah, maybe they would have been like, ‘sounds cool’, but it would be in a ‘that could never happen’ kind of way.”
“I just wish we could have done more to prepare them for us leaving. You know they’re going to do something stupid.”
“I left Tobi instructions. I told her not to follow us under any circumstances.”
“Do you really think that they’ll listen to a note?” Layne scoffed. Jax was one of the most single-minded men she had ever met in her entire life. He was stubborn like a mule, and when he had his mind set on something, that was exactly how it was going to be. Although it could be sexy sometimes, there were other times it could be maddening. Right now, Layne couldn’t tell which one it was. She only hoped that she wouldn’t be causing him any trouble.
“It’s better than nothing. If they think we’re kidnapped or something, they’re definitely going to come out looking for us, full force with their fists swinging. Tobi’s a brute.”
Sam laughed fondly and Layne couldn’t help but join her. She could see why Tobi was Jax’s best friend. They were both stubborn asses, but loyal to a fault and ready and willing to jump in and lend a hand however they could. They were simple in a way, affectionate, kind, and never two faced about anything. Brutal honesty was their forte. People like Layne and Sam, however, were a little bit more complicated. They were quiet, reserved, and analytical. So busy observing and storing little factoids and tidbits away that they weren’t always completely open and honest about how they were feeling or what they were thinking. They were scientists.
“Anyway, we’re going to get that equipment, and we’re going to save that baby. I have faith and confidence in my calculations.”
“I have faith in them, too. I’ve never seen anything so close to a cure.”
“Well,” Sam warned. “It’s just a theory. We have to get the equipment to find out whether or not it will actually work. But that’s not the part I’m most worried about.”
Layne’s heart jumped to her throat. The tone of Sam’s voice was a little bit ominous.
“What are you the most worried about?”
Sam hesitated for a moment before finally answering.
“There’s no easy or fun way to say this, and I already know how you feel about this,” she said, avoiding Layne’s eyes. “We’re going to have to mingle with the infected.”
Chapter Seven
Jax awoke the next morning and stretched, surprised to find that Layne had already woken up. She had been staying in bed later and later lately, probably because of those journals she was working on until all hours of the night. He admired her tenacity, but it was still a little bit lonely when she was going about her day on her own during the hours he was either busy or asleep.
Layne was probably out with Sam, talking about some scientific theory or another that he had never heard anything about while he was listening to his friends joking about sex in his woodworking classes. It had been a stroke of good luck to find such a compatible friend for Layne. Especially when they needed a doctor the most. He would be so lost if anything ever happened to her.
“Good morning,” Jax said, smiling at Tobi as he passed her to head into the kitchen. But Tobi wasn’t smiling back at him. She was staring down at a white piece of paper in her hands. It looked like one from Sam’s extensive medical journals.
“Is something wrong?” he asked, walking toward Tobi.
Tobi shook her head in disbelief, handing the paper to Jax. She wanted to speak, but didn’t seem capable of getting the words out. For Tobi, that meant that there must be a big problem.
Jax took the paper from her trembling hands and read over it quickly. He was sure that his brain wasn’t processing the information correctly. It couldn’t be. So he re-read it, a little bit slower this time.
“What does this mean?” Jax asked, handing the paper back to her and taking a step backward. He squeezed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and index finger, staggering toward his bedroom.
“Layne?” Jax bellowed.
Tobi was still sitting on the floor in a stunned silence as Jax tore through the house, shouting Layne’s name. Finally, he found the little note on the desk that she had left him and gripped it tightly, slinking down beside Tobi and dropping it on the floor between them.
“They’re gone…”
Tobi nodded, her eyes wild and full of a grief that Jax hadn’t seen in them since she got news that her sister had been killed by a rival tribe.
“You know what? Fuck this. We’re going to go find them. If they don’t want to get themselves killed out there, they should have asked us for help. Did they think we were that useless?”
Tobi finally spoke up.
“Damn it. The note says they were afraid if we left, the people from Hex would get us. And we need to protect the resources here at the homestead while they go off on this ridiculous wild goose chase. What the fuck.”
“No way. My – Layne is pregnant. I’m not just going to sit here and let her go fucking around with Sam. Maybe if it was with you, but Sam?”
“What are you trying to say, Jax?” Tobi growled, standing up and glaring down at him. “Sam can take care of herself!”
“You’re stronger than she is! You’re a better fighter. Make a better body guard.”
“Not since I got shot,” Tobi reminded him.
Tobi’s ex, Kelsey, had found their settlement when he had led Sam and Tobi to Layne to make sure that if she was sick or pregnant, she would have a doctor to help her along the way. Kelsey had brought henchmen along with her and it had resulted in two bodies being buried outside of the garden. But it had also resulted in severe nerve damage. Tobi’s left arm was almost useless. She was still going through rigorous physical therapy, a regimen that had been prescribed, and usually enforced, by Sam.
“Well that might be true. And I know that Layne is tough and fast and bright…and so is Sam. They’re both all of those things. But Layne is pregnant and Sam doesn’t strike me as the kind who would take a life. She’s the kind who saves them. Right? Isn’t that what you love about her?”
Tobi’s anger seemed to melt away. Without it, she looked too vulnerable, and Jax sighed, wishing that things could go back to the way they were when he had woken up the day before. Tobi and Sam entwined together on their makeshift bed in the living room. Layne walking moodily throughout the house, checking on things that weren’t out of place and scribbling in her notebook.
“Sam says there’s a chance that they can set things right. What do you think she means by that?”
“I don’t know,” Jax sighed, looking down at the note in Layne’s flowing script. “I don’t know but I wish like hell they would have said something instead of going off and doing something reckless. You know I have to stop them.”
“Then I’m going with you.”
“Somebody needs to stay here to take care of Gilly.”
“Why can’t she just come along?”
“Tobi…”
“But what if they’re right?” Tobi mumbled, almost so quietly that Jax couldn’t hear her. “What if they’re really going to save the world?”
Jax and Tobi sat numbly on the floor as the situation truly began to sink in. The women they loved were gone, and the only way to bring them back would be to put their lives at risk and go find them.
***
Layne woke up with a start, and the sickening guilt she felt from leaving Jax behind the night before was the first thing she became aware of. Sam was already awake, stirring a small pot of beans over a crackling fire.
“Morning,” Sam said. “There’s some water beside you.”
Layne didn’t snap at her this time and took a long, deep swig of water. It helped her fight back some of the nausea she was suffering from her guilt, but it wasn’t enough to make her forget their situation. But she and Sam were determined, and nothing would get in their way. She
would turn as vicious as need be to protect herself and the baby.
“That smells good,” Layne said quietly. She felt bad for being so impatient with Sam. She owed everything to Sam. If it weren’t for her, they never would have cracked the code and embarked upon this ridiculous adventure.
“I’m surprised you can think about eating,” Sam said, laughing wryly.
“Well, it comes and goes,” Layne said. “Right now I happen to be craving whatever it is you’re cooking.”
Sam grinned and brought a bowl of food over to Layne. They ate quietly before packing up camp and heading out on the trail. It was nice having a traveling companion. They slept in shifts and kept an eye on each other. Layne hadn’t had that luxury when she had scavenged for the baby’s things. It had nearly cost her her life. Fortunately, she had survived and was able to get an adorable puppy out of it too.
She was starting to make peace with the fact that she had left Jax behind. It was nice to remember that she could take care of herself, without needing him or anybody else. Still, it was a relief that Sam was along for the ride. Together, they would get their goal accomplished, no matter what.
Chapter Eight
