The Healing Hand

by Barbara Cartland

She had no wish for her to see the very beautiful evening gown she was wearing.

  Actually it had indeed cost what she thought was an extravagant amount of money, but it was so attractive she had felt she must put it on for the party tonight.

  Tania had good taste that she had inherited from her mother.

  The gown highlighted her figure and enhanced her own unique aura.

  It gave her in some way almost a spiritual look and yet, when she was laughing, she was the personification of youth and happiness.

  She had fortunately found a lovely cape that would go with all her gowns and would keep her warm when the night was cool.

  When she had finished dressing, Betsy exclaimed with delight,

  “You really looks lovely, miss, and there won’t be a gentleman at the party who won’t tell you so!”

  “I hope you are right, Betsy, but I expect I will have a lot of competition.”

  She was musing that if the Bracebridges were going to ask her mother’s friends to dinner, most of them would be older than her.

  Going to the door, she opened it and listened.

  She could hear her stepmother’s guests arriving and she knew that she would be in the drawing room waiting to receive them.

  When there was a short pause between arrivals, she hurried down the stairs.

  Dawson was in the hall and she whispered to him,

  “I will be in the morning room, Dawson. When I see the carriage coming for me, I will come out quickly.”

  She did not need to explain the reason that she had no wish to see her stepmother or for her stepmother to see her.

  Dawson understood perfectly,

  “Please don’t worry, Miss Tania. If the gentleman asks for you, I’ll see that the drawing room door is closed afore you comes out of the morning room.”

  Tania smiled at him.

  “Thank you, Dawson. I don’t want any trouble just before I go out for dinner.”

  “Of course not, Miss Tania. You leave it to me – ”

  It was just three minutes after half-past seven when Tania, gazing out of the window of the morning room, saw a carriage draw up outside the front door.

  Before the footman could climb down from the box, the passenger inside let himself out.

  It was Rupert.

  Tania felt a sudden leap of her heart as she ran to the door.

  As she opened it, she heard Rupert’s deep voice say,

  “I am calling for Miss Amesly.”

  “She’s ready waiting for you, sir,” replied Dawson.

  Tania, pulling her cloak around her, stepped out of the morning room.

  She ran across the hall and down the steps.

  Rupert helped her into the carriage.

  And even as they drove off another carriage came up behind them and Tania guessed that it was another of her stepmother’s friends arriving.

  She smiled at Rupert and he commented wryly,

  “I have a feeling you have escaped rather than just left!”

  “My stepmother is having a party tonight,” Tania answered demurely, “and I don’t want to be involved with her guests.”

  “You are looking so lovely,” Rupert sighed. “I wish I was taking you out alone rather than having to go to a party.”

  Tania smiled.

  “I am sure that is something I would not be allowed to do.”

  “But perhaps we can before I do go away?”

  She looked at him, her eyes opening apprehensively.

  “Go away!” she exclaimed, “do you mean to war?”

  “The reason I could not meet you earlier is because I had to see the Secretary for War and I am afraid war is inevitable, Tania, and before we go, I am afraid that I will be very busy. So it is unlikely I will be able to see as much of you as I would wish.”

  Tania drew in her breath.

  “I want to see you too,” she murmured.

  They were passing a lighted lamp as she spoke and Rupert thought her large eyes looking up into his was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen.

  “I met you by chance, Tania, and I am determined not to lose you now.”

  Tania had a strange feeling within her breast.

  It felt as if her heart was beating unrestrainedly.

  “I feel just the same, Rupert, it was such fun when we were on the ferry.”

  “I think it will always be fun when we are together, but war is war, and as you know I am a soldier.”

  “You must take very great care of yourself.”

  Rupert smiled at her and she knew, although he did not reply, he was thinking that was impossible in the face of the enemy.

  She tried to think of something she could say. Something to make him realise that she wanted him to come back to her.

  Then the horses drew up outside the Bracebridge’s house in Belgrave Square.

  There were flares blazing outside the door and two carriages were moving away ahead of them.

  “It looks as if it is going to be a big party,” Tania muttered.

  “All in your honour, Tania, and you should be flattered. I am told that the parties given by the Bracebridges are always much sought after and extremely enjoyable.”

  “Just as I was so lucky when you found me on the train, so I am lucky now we have come back to London.”

  “Then let’s hope our luck will never fail,” Rupert added as a footman opened the door of the carriage.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  The house in Belgrave Square was, as Tania had expected, large, well furnished and extremely impressive.

  Selina Bracebridge and her husband welcomed her most affectionately, and they were also delighted to see Rupert.

  “I am afraid that you have come home to very bad news,” Charles said to Rupert.

  “You are right, it is extremely bad,” agreed Rupert.

  “We are expecting Sidney Herbert later,” Charles went on, “so he will undoubtedly tell us the worst.”

  Then other guests were announced and Tania and Rupert moved away.

  Fortunately he knew many people in the room and, as their host and hostess were busy, he introduced Tania to his friends.

  They were a party of eighteen for dinner and Tania found herself sitting, not beside Rupert as she had hoped, but between two pleasant young gentlemen who paid her many compliments and made her laugh.

  They certainly added considerably to the bright and amusing atmosphere of the occasion.

  It was only after dinner that a number of older guests arrived and then Tania realised that Selina had been thoughtful enough to invite only the young for dinner.

  They congregated in the drawing room and Tania found so many of them spoke of her mother and father with affection that she felt tears coming into her eyes.

  “Your mother was the most beautiful person I have ever seen, lovely on both the outside and within,” one lady told her, “and your father was indeed one of the most popular men in the whole Social world.”

  It was exactly what Tania wanted to hear and it was marvellous to feel that her parents had not been forgotten.

  They did not dance, but Selina promised that there would be a dance another night, so the younger guests left early and then the older ones, who had either been talking or playing card games, thought it was time to leave too.

  When Tania and Rupert were about to depart, the big reception room was almost empty.

  “You must come and see me if you feel lonely or are missing your mother,” Selina told Tania. “Just run in and, if I am not here, wait until I come back.”

  “You are so kind and, as I am not welcome at home, I am afraid you may find me dropping in at any moment!”

  “That is just what I want you to do, Tania. Charles and I will be very pleased to see Rupert as well.”

  “I only hope I am able to accept your invitation,” said Rupert. “But as you know, things seem very worrying at present.”

  As he was speaking, the door opened and the butler announced,

  “Sir Si
dney Herbert, madam.”

  He strode into the room as Selina held out her arms.

  “Oh, Sidney, I am so very pleased to see you. I was afraid, as you didn’t come earlier, you could not get away.”

  “I only managed it at the last moment,” Sir Sidney responded, “and I had no wish to disappoint you and not to hear about your adventures in Germany.”

  Then he saw Rupert and beckoned him over,

  “I would like a word with you, More.”

  “I was just leaving, Sir Sidney – ”

  “Then please wait for just a moment.”

  Rupert hurried towards him and together they walked to the far end of the room and stood by the window.

  Sir Sidney was obviously telling Rupert something that was too important to be overheard by anyone else.

  Tania waited a little uncomfortably.

  She was afraid that Rupert might not be able to take her back home as she so hoped.

  Then leaving Sir Sidney he came across to her and she realised with relief that their conversation was over and they could now leave.

  They said farewell to the Bracebridges and thanked them both for a wonderful evening.

  “Come in tomorrow if you have time,” Selina said to Tania. “I have some engagements, but I will be here at teatime.”

  “I would love to, Mrs. Bracebridge, and thank you again a thousand times.”

  At the front door Rupert’s carriage was waiting for them.

  He gave the coachman his instructions after Tania had stepped in, so that she did not hear what he said.

  Then, as Rupert joined her, she felt that there was something wrong, as he did not speak.

  “What is it? What has happened?” she enquired.

  “It is as I feared, Tania, the British Government is declaring war on Russia tomorrow!”

  Tania gave a cry of alarm.

  “So what has happened?”

  “As you may not know, the Foreign Secretary sent a sharp note after the Russians sunk a Turkish Naval Squadron in the Black Sea, stating that unless they agreed to evacuate the two countries of Moldavia and Wallachia by April there would be war.”

  Tania was listening to him intently, but she could not fully understand all that Rupert was telling her.

  He continued,

  “The Russians, however, have not waited and have already said that they have no intention of complying. In consequence we and France have declared war.”

  “How can we possibly fight them, Rupert? You have already told me we are not ready and don’t have enough troops!”

  “We can only hope that with the help of France we will be able to give the Russians the lesson they richly deserve.”

  “Then it means you have to go, Rupert?”

  “Yes, I must, and our troops are not really ready for such an expedition. But it has to be done and that means I will have to leave – you.”

  The way he spoke made Tania turn to look at him.

  In the darkness of the carriage with the only light coming from the lamps they passed, it was difficult to see the expression on his face.

  Yet she knew instinctively that his vibrations, the very essence of his being, were reaching out to touch hers.

  “You must take great care of yourself, Rupert,” she whispered softly.

  “I will take care because I really want to return to you. We have only just met, Tania, but I knew as soon as I saw you that you would mean a great deal in my life and that you are so different from anyone else.”

  “Do you really feel like that?” she asked. “I think I feel the same about you – ”

  He smiled.

  “That makes things very easy, but I am not going to ask you to make any quick decision about our future.”

  Tania drew in her breath.

  “It would be most unfair and unjust to you, when I am going away for Heaven knows how long, to make you feel tied to me. If and when I return, I will say what I am longing to say to you now.”

  “Will it really be a long time?” Tania asked him in a soft hesitating little voice.

  “You know exactly what I am feeling and therefore, my darling, because I love you, I am going to say nothing more until, please God, I return.”

  Tania gasped.

  She wanted to say a thousand things to him and beg him to tell her what he meant by saying he loved her.

  But she realised he was keeping an iron control on himself and she must let him do things his way – not hers.

  “I am going to ask you just one question,” Rupert murmured after what seemed a long silence.

  “What is it?” Tania asked breathlessly

  “What do you feel about me? Just tell me the truth.”

  There was a pause and then Tania whispered,

  “I think I love you, but I am so ignorant about love. I only know that I want to be with you for always. I would have found this evening dull and empty if you had not been there.”

  “Oh, my sweet darling Tania, that is the beginning of love and there are a thousand things I can teach you later about love. Love is something I have always dreamt about, but thought would never happen to me in real life.”

  “I dreamt that you would find me, Rupert.”

  “I dreamt I would find someone perfect. Someone who would love me not for my family, nor my money – not for anything except the love that makes two people one, and enables them to be supremely happy not just for a few years but forever.”

  “That is what I want too. As I have said, I know so little about love. I have met hardly any men, having only just left school, but I have always believed that one day, like my Papa and Mama, I would find a person who would make me so happy that nothing else in the world mattered.”

  “That is exactly what we will find together, Tania, but I must, my darling one, leave you free, in case we are mistaken and you find someone else whom you love more than you love me.”

  “I am absolutely certain that will never happen and I will think of you, Rupert, and pray for you every day you are away.”

  “God knows I will need your prayers, but I feel they will give me an invisible armour that will enable me to come back to you.”

  As he spoke, he picked up her hand.

  At his touch she felt herself tremble with a strange excitement.

  “How can you possibly be so beautiful?” he asked. “As a thousand men will tell you when I am not here.”

  “If they do, I will merely wish it was you telling me and not them.”

  Almost with a cry, she asked him,

  “When will I see you again, Rupert?”

  “I would hope and pray that I will be able to see you tomorrow. But after what Sidney Herbert told me this evening, I know we will have to move to the coast where there are ships waiting to take us to the Black Sea.”

  “Tomorrow! But how can you possibly, possibly be ready by then?”

  “It seems an impossibility at present, but we have already foreseen this and therefore most of our equipment has been packed and has only to be moved to the coast.

  “It will take us a long time, perhaps over a month, to actually reach Varna on the Black sea. Of course, by that time the Russians may have taken up their positions, so we are not at all certain where we will finally land.”

  “It sounds terribly muddling and I cannot imagine why you have to go to a war that seems to be almost at the other end of the world,” Tania sighed.

  Rupert smiled.

  “That is the right way to put it, but we have, I think, to be as mobile as possible and not make rigid plans which cannot be adjusted to the circumstances.”

  He made a gesture with his hands as he added,

  “No one appears to know what is happening, except that the Russians are being horribly cruel to their Turkish prisoners of war, who fought gallantly to no avail.”

  “I am frightened for you,” murmured Tania. “Very very frightened.”

  “I have to do what is right, Tania. It is after all what I have trained fo
r and worked towards for many years. It is only because at this last moment I have found you that I so wish I could stay in England longer and tell you again and again how beautiful you are and how much I love you.”

  As he spoke, the carriage came to a standstill.

  Tania realised that having driven round Hyde Park while they had been talking, they had now stopped outside her house in Park Lane.

  The coachman opened the door.

  Tania turned to Rupert feeling tearful.

  “You really cannot leave me like this. I must say goodbye to you.”

  Rupert did not reply and, as she climbed out of the carriage, the night footman opened the front door.

  Rupert turned to his coachman,

  “Wait for me, Wilkins, I will not be long.”

  The coachman raised his hand to his hat and Rupert walked into the house beside Tania.

  There were only a few lights left on in the hall and they made for the drawing room.

  For a second Tania was afraid that her stepmother’s guests had not left and she would be still there.

  They went into the drawing room and then Rupert closed the door.

  They were in complete darkness with the exception of the moonlight coming in through one window, where the curtain must have been left undrawn by mistake.

  It was letting in a silver light that touched the floor. For a moment they stood close to each other.

  Then slowly, as if he had no wish to frighten her or to spoil the magic that was enveloping them both, Rupert drew Tania close into his arms.

  “I love you, Tania,” he breathed. “Try to remember me, and, as you said, pray for me every day. I will dream of you every single night I am away – ”

  Then he was kissing her.

  Kissing her at first gently as if not to frighten her. He felt her body melting into his and then her lips became responsive as his kisses became more possessive.

  He kissed her and went on kissing her.

  Tania felt as if they were part of the moonlight and he was carrying her up into the sky and they were dancing amongst the stars.

  Then, without another word, he released her, opened the door and hurried out into the hall.

  He closed the door behind him leaving her standing in the drawing room.

  She heard his footsteps until there was the sound of the front door closing behind him.