“My mother died. Then I got married. I couldn’t find the cause that would sweep me off my feet.”
“Because you only love yourself.”
“How did you know?” she said, mockingly. “Actually, I love my body.”
“I’m being serious. You only take. I challenge you to recall one time that you gave.”
She smiled and gestured with her chin at the couch, saying, “Lots of times. With you, for example.”
“With me you took without giving,” I said.
She stood up and walked over to me, then sat on my lap.
“Don’t you want to give me something before you travel?”
She looked appealing, her face flushed with emotion. I put my arm around her waist and she leaned against my chest.
“I didn’t finish telling you what Adnan told me,” she said. “He is prepared to take a risk on your behalf. Because of the promise he gave you. But in this situation, you will have to relinquish all your rights.”
“Is that all?”
“No. There’s another idea. There is a Swiss company that is interested in publishing the book.”
“In Arabic?”
“Of course.”
“I didn’t know the Swiss read Arabic.”
“We will distribute it to Arab readers.”
“In Switzerland?”
“No, dummy. Use your brain. The book didn’t leave a single Arab regime unscathed. And then there’s the sex in it. What is the only place where it can be distributed without restrictions?”
“Lebanon,” I volunteered.
“Lebanon isn’t a distribution center. It’s only a production center. There isn’t a publisher in his right mind who would think of relying on Lebanese readers alone. Only one place can easily print and distribute the book.”
“Where?” I asked, puzzled.
“I didn’t think you were this stupid. Israel, of course. There are more than one and a quarter million Palestinians thirsting to read something in Arabic.”
I lit a new cigarette and noticed my hand was steady.
“Write us a letter authorizing us to act on your behalf,” she went on. “We’ll take care of the whole thing. It will be a lucrative deal, and you’ll be able to get some of the advance before you leave.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“Are you paying in cash or in kind?” I asked.
She slapped my chest playfully. “You’re terrible!” she said. “You don’t deserve to be treated nicely.”
She leaned over me and put her cheek up against mine.
“You know, you haven’t slept with me yet,” she whispered in English.
I placed my palm on the triangular opening of her sweater, and ran my hand up her neck, up to her clavicle. My fingers probed the base of her neck, and I felt her skin.
“Do you like my neck?” she whispered.
She pushed her head back to give me an opportunity to admire her neck, and I put my fingers around it.
She closed her eyes and a purple tinge appeared on the skin of her neck, spreading to her chin and cheeks. The place where I touched her neck was soft and tender, and I gently pressed on it.
“Hey,” she said in a faint voice. “You’re hurting me.”
I suddenly sensed that I was fully erect. Without letting go of her neck, I undid my pants with one hand, and pushed her clothes to the side. Then I leaned on top of her and raised my right hand to her neck. I clutched it between my fingers while thrusting into her body.
A mysterious glow burned in the space of the room, coursing through my body and my entire being. My fingers continued to press on her neck muscles and their bulging veins, while my body moved on top of her.
Her face began to contort with pain. Her lips slackened into a moan, and her neck and face turned red. But I paid no mind. The fire was lit before me. My semen was welling up inside me and was on the point of bursting out and gushing forth. Every squeeze of my fingers on her neck became a step toward the edge of the pitch-black abyss, where the exploding volcano was, and absolute ecstasy.
Chapter 27
I didn’t choke her, and I didn’t have my orgasm. She gathered her strength and roughly pushed me off her. She was able to free her neck from my fingers. She jumped up and stared at me in alarm, while I collapsed into my chair, breathing heavily, my limbs quivering.
She raised her hands to her neck and moved her lips, but her voice was stuck in her throat. Without caring about her appearance, she grabbed her coat and bag, and hurried to the apartment door. She opened it and rushed outside.
I listened to her footsteps on the stairs. Then I slowly got up, adjusted my clothes, walked to the door and closed it.
The sun had set, and it had grown dark more quickly than usual. I turned the light on in the living room. I walked to the library and picked up a bottle of whiskey. I wrenched off the cap and took a swig directly from the bottle.
I looked for the pack of cigarettes, and found it on the floor beside the chair. I lit a cigarette with trembling fingers and sat back down.
I smoked the cigarette down to the end and stubbed it out in the ashtray. Then I walked to my room and brought my carry-on and suitcase out to the living room. I picked up the envelope that held my manuscript and put it back in the secret compartment in my suitcase.
I felt surprisingly cold and put on my jacket. I took a mouthful from the whiskey bottle. I looked at my watch, then lit a cigarette and went back to my seat.
After a while I heard a car horn, and I walked over to the balcony. I found a taxi in front of the building. I closed the balcony door, and checked to make sure I had my passport and plane ticket in my pocket. Then I slung the carry-on over my shoulder and picked up my suitcase. I cast a final glance around the apartment, then turned out the light and left.
Glossary
al-Amal: Newspaper belonging to the Phalangist Party.
al-As’ad, Kamil (1932–2010): Shiite Lebanese politician from a powerful family in Lebanon’s south. He served as speaker of the Lebanese parliament several times, including from 1970 to 1984.
al-Atrash, Sultan Pasha (1891–1982): Spiritual and political leader of the Druze tribes of Jebel Druze in southern Syria. Leader of a Druze revolt against the French in 1925.
Ali Pasha, Muhammad (r.1805–48): An Albanian soldier who came to power in Egypt in the wake of Napoleon’s invasion and expulsion. Although nominally a viceroy of the Ottoman sultan, he became powerful enough to invade the Middle East, occupying Lebanon and parts of Syria. He is known as a reforming ruler who set Egypt on an early path to modernity.
al-Manfaluti, Mustafa Lutfi (1876–1924): Egyptian author of essays and sentimental short stories.
Amal militia: Armed Shia faction in the Lebanese Civil War, which grew out of the earlier Movement of the Dispossessed founded by the Shii Imam al-Sadr.
Arab Deterrent Forces: Peacekeeping forces sponsored by Arab League countries that were deployed across Lebanon starting in November, 1976. Their purpose was to take over peacekeeping duties from the Syrian Army, although Syria continued to provide the majority of ADF troops in Lebanon.
Bamahaneh: The official, semi-independent magazine of the Israeli Defense Forces.
bey: A term of respect, originally Turkish, roughly equivalent to “lord”. Frequently used to refer to dignitaries and men of high position in the Ottoman Empire, but now mostly obsolete and old-fashioned-sounding in the Arab world. “Ya bey” is used when addressing someone directly as a bey.
blue bone: Slang derogatory term for a Christian.
Capucci, Hilarion (1922–) Greek Catholic bishop born in Aleppo. An outspoken supporter of Palestinian rights and an opponent of Israel.
Chamoun, Camille (1900–87): President of Lebanon from 1952 to 1958, when his illegal attempt to secure himself another presidential term led to a brief civil war, a deployment of American Marines, and his eventual removal from office. In 1975, the grant of exclusive fishing rights off Sidon made to a private company he heade
d, a move that was strongly protested by local (mostly Muslim) fishermen, was one of the catalysts for the outbreak of the civil war a few months later. He was a founder of the National Liberal Party, which was part of the rightist, Christian-dominated Lebanese Front.
Darwish, Sayed (1892–1923): Egyptian composer widely considered the father of popular music in the Arab world.
Deir Yassin: Name of a Palestinian village near Jerusalem where 107 Palestinian Arab inhabitants were massacred by the radical Israeli paramilitary group Irgun in 1948.
Deuxième Bureau: The Lebanese government’s bureau of military intelligence.
Druze: A secretive Muslim sect which traditionally has been considered heretical by other Muslim groups. The Druze, under the leadership of Kamal Jumblatt, generally allied with the leftist Lebanese National Forces (LNF) during the civil war.
Eddé: Raymond (1913–2000): Moderate Maronite leader.
Fairuz (1935–): Professional name of a Lebanese singer beloved across the Arab world.
Fatah: A Palestinian nationalist group founded by Yasser Arafat in 1959, which soon joined the PLO, and eventually came to dominate it.
fedayeen: Literally, “those who sacrifice” or “those who redeem”. A term that came to mean Palestinian militants and unofficial fighters.
Feisal (Emir Feisal bin Hussein bin Ali bin al-Hashimi) (1883–1933): Oldest son of the sharif of Mecca and a leader of the Arab Revolt against Ottoman rule during World War One. After the war, the Emir Feisal was the king of the short-lived Arab Kingdom of Syria, before becoming the first king of the newly established monarchy of Iraq from 1921 until his death twelve years later.
fellah(a): Egyptian term for the traditional peasant class in rural Egypt along the Nile.
Frangieh, Suleiman (1910–92): Maronite politician and head of a powerful clan from Zgharta near Tripoli. President of Lebanon 1970–76.
Gemayel, Bashir (1947–82): Youngest son of Maronite leader Pierre Gemayel, and militia commander of the rightist, Christian Lebanese National Forces during the civil war.
Gemayel, Pierre (1902–84): Founder of the Phalangist Party and patriarch of the Gemayel clan, one of the strongest Maronite clans during the civil war.
ghutra: A white cotton headdress generally worn by men from the Gulf countries. Can be worn with or without the black cord known as the ’iqal.
Green Line: The dividing line (drawn as a green line on maps) separating West and East Beirut, strongholds of the Muslim and Christian sides in the civil war.
Guardians of the Cedars: Strongly anti-Palestinian, Lebanese ultra-nationalist militia.
Gur, Mordechai (1930–1995): Israeli general and politician who served as chief of staff of the Israeli Defense Forces from 1974 to 1978.
Habash, George (1926–2008): A Palestinian militant and leader of the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine, a Marxist organization that rivaled the PLO and was more closely allied with the Soviet Union.
Haddad, Saad (1936–84): Defecting Lebanese military officer who formed the South Lebanon Army to defend Christian enclaves in southern Lebanon and collaborated closely with Israel.
Hamra Street: Name of a popular commercial street in West Beirut, known for its restaurants and cafés. Also refers to the surrounding neighborhood.
hatta: A checkered Palestinian scarf (usually red or black against a white background). Can be worn on the head or around the neck. Partly because Yasser Arafat was rarely seen without it, it became associated with the Palestinian resistance movement.
Imam Musa al-Sadr (1928–78): Born in Qom, Iran. Radical religious leader of Lebanon’s downtrodden Shii community. In 1973, he founded the Movement of the Dispossessed, which claimed to represent all the underprivileged of Lebanon, not just Shiis.
Iyad, Abu: The name most commonly used by Salah Khalaf (1936–91), Fatah’s second-in-command and head of its intelligence wing.
Jumblatt, Kamal (1917–77): Radical Druze leader who founded the leftist Progressive Socialist Party. A fervent Arab nationalist, he was a vocal leader of the Muslim/leftist front during the civil war.
Karami, Rashid (1921–87): Sunni Lebanese political leader from Tripoli who served as prime minister several times from the 1950s until his assassination in 1987.
lebneh: A tangy yogurt cheese eaten as an appetizer or spread.
Maronites: A Lebanese Christian sect in communion with the Roman Catholic Church. The “informal agreement” that has organized Lebanese politics since the country’s independence guarantees that the president of Lebanon is always a Maronite.
Martyrs’ Square: A well-known square in central Beirut, Sahat al-Shohada, named for sixteen Arab nationalists hanged there by Ottoman authorities during World War One.
Maslakh-Karantina (the “Slaughterhouse-Quarantine” district): Adjoining urban neighborhoods in East Beirut near the port that by the 1970s had become overcrowded slums. Populated mainly by poor Shiis, Kurds, Armenians and Palestinians, it was controlled by the PLO. Most notorious as the site of a massacre of its inhabitants committed on January 18, 1976 by Christian militias as part of their drive to consolidate control over East Beirut.
Mourabitoun (‘‘the Sentinels’’): A Nasserist organization founded in the 1950s, which was revived during the lead-up to the civil war and which allied with other leftist militias in West Beirut.
Movement of the Dispossessed: See Amal militia.
Nasser, Gamal Abdel (1918–70): Fiery, charismatic president of the Republic of Egypt from 1954 until his death in 1970. As the foremost champion of Arab nationalism and a vocal proponent of Arab unity, Nasser was an inspiring political leader for a generation of Arabs in newly independent nations of the Arab world in the 1950s and 1960s. He enacted sweeping nationalization programs and ran a repressive regime domestically.
Phalangist Party: A right-wing Christian party (and militia) founded in 1937 by Pierre Gemayel. Dominated by the Gemayel clan, the Phalangists became a major force on the Christian side during the civil war, and strenuously opposed the Palestinian presence in Lebanon.
Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine (PFLP): Soviet-backed Marxist–Leninist Palestinian resistance group founded and led by George Habash. At the time, the second largest organization in the PLO after Fatah.
Ravagers: An Israeli term for Palestinian militants.
Saad, Maaruf (1910–1975): A popular Sunni politician from Sidon who was allied with the Lebanese left and with Nasserism. He championed local opposition to the monopolistic privileges granted to Camille Chamoun’s Protein Company. In late February 1975, he was shot – possibly by a Lebanese Army sniper – during a protest and died a few weeks later. His death became a rallying cry for the Lebanese left and Palestinians opposed to the Lebanese government, and was one of the triggers for the outbreak of civil war that spring.
Sahat al-Burj Square: Sahat al-Burj, meaning “Tower Square”, was a central square named for its clock-tower. It was later renamed Martyrs’ Square, but the neighborhood around it was notorious for brothels.
Sa’iqa: A Palestinian militia led by Zuhayr Muhsin formed and controlled by Syria’s Baathist regime.
Salam, Sa’ib (1905–2000): Sunni Lebanese political leader who served as prime minister several times from the 1950s to 1972. During the civil war, he was a major ally of the Saudis in Lebanon.
Sentinels: See Mourabitoun.
Syrian Social Nationalist Party (SSNP): A proto-fascist political party founded in 1932 explicitly modeled on European fascist groups, and promoting a national identity encompassing much of the territory historically known as Syria.
tarbush: The fez. Round red cap with a flat top commonly worn by men in the Middle East in the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries.
Tigers: Short for “Tigers of the Liberals” (Numur al-Ahrar), they were a militia linked to the National Liberal Party, part of the rightist, Christian Lebanese National Forces coalition during the civil war.
zaatar: Arabic for ‘‘oregano’’. Al
so the name given to a spice mix used to flavor bread or olive oil.
Acknowledgments
Behind every book there are always other books, and people other than the author.
Whether through practical assistance or moral support, this book owes its existence to my wife, as well as Ra’uf Mas’ad, Mohi al-Labad and Muhammad Berrada.
As for the books, they are: Lebanon’s War, edited by Galal Mahmud and photographed by Abd al-Razzaq al-Said, who lost his life while doing his job following the Israeli destruction of West Beirut in 1982 (Dar al-Masarra, 1977); Diaries of the Lebanese War (Center for Planning Affiliated with the Palestinian Liberation Organization, 1977); The Lebanese Crisis, by a group of scholars (The Arab League Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization, 1978); The Great Bloodletting of Lebanon, by Sami Mansur (Cairo Arab Center, 1981); Tell Zaatar (Palestinian Women’s Union, 1977); The Litani Operation, by Ashraf Elias Shufani (Occupied Palestine magazine, 1978); The Tragedy of Lebanon, by Jonathan Randal (Hogarth Press, 1983); Autumn of Fury, by Muhammad Hasanayn Haykal (Beirut, 1983); The War and the Experience of the Lebanese National Movement, by Muhsin Ibrahim (Beirut al-Masaa, 1983); articles by Bakr al-Sharqawi in the magazine Ruz al-Yusuf, 1976, and articles by ’Isam Sharih in the magazine al-Duha, 1982; Capucci, by Haydar Haydar (Ibn Rushd, 1978); Good Morning, Nation! by Ra’uf Mas’ad (Matbu’at al-Qahira, 1983); People Under Siege, by Mahjub Umar (Dar al-Arabi, 1983); Pages from the Boy’s Workbook, by Hani Fahas (Dar al-Kalima, 1979); Beirut’s Nightmares, by Ghada Samman; Zahra’s Story, by Hanan al-Shaykh; Little Mountain, by Elias Khoury; and “Beirut – Up From the Rubble,” by William S. Ellis with photographs by Steve McCurry, National Geographic, February, 1983.
And thanks to my friends who were kind enough to read the manuscript and offer their opinions on it: Saad al-Din Hasan, Ghanim Bibi, Nadia Muhammad Yusuf, Yusra Nasrallah, as well as others whom circumstances do not allow me to name.
Sonallah Ibrahim, December 1983
Translator’s Afterword
It has been a privilege to translate Sonallah Ibrahim’s Beirut, Beirut, not only because it is a powerful work by a major author, but because it successfully blurs the genres of journalism and fiction, blending the rigor of the former with the narrative demands of the latter. Is this a work of fiction with a heavy dose of names and facts? Or is it a history lesson (like Antoinette’s film) in the guise of a novel? Either way we view Beirut, Beirut, it is obvious that Ibrahim’s own journalism background informs his approach to fiction, as it does in his other novels. As Robyn Creswell has pointed out in a 2013 profile of Sonallah Ibrahim in the New Yorker, “Ibrahim’s fictions are full of real or invented documents. They stick out of the surrounding text like exposed structural beams, as if he were purposefully drawing our attention to the archival labor involved in writing.”
Beirut, Beirut Page 27
