by E. L. Todd
“Almost five years now.”
“And what made you pursue that business?”
I shrugged. “It’s difficult for women to find quality underwear.”
“Uh, have you heard of Victoria’s Secret?” he asked, his eyebrows raised.
“But that’s mass-produced stuff. The products I sell are direct from the designer, and they’re specifically made for every body type. With popular stores, they expect every single woman to fit into one design…which isn’t possible. When you come into my shop, you work with me on a personal level so you get a much better experience. Besides, a lot of women are self-conscious about wearing lingerie, and I boost their ego a bit.” After my husband told me he preferred men, I needed an ego boost too. Wearing lingerie helped with that—and so did Jax.
He listened to every word I said, a handsome smile on his face.
“What?”
“You’re cute.”
“Cute?” I asked.
“Yeah. It’s obvious you love what you do. Running a business isn’t easy, especially a small boutique place like that. But if you’ve been in business for so long, you obviously have loyal customers. They must like you as much as your lingerie.”
Now that I had given Jax a chance, I saw the sexy qualities underneath his sexy exterior. He was charming, sweet, and attentive. “Well, thanks…” I looked down and picked up a few fries before I placed them in my mouth. “What kind of business are you in?” I’d never planned to ask him because he was obviously wealthy. Rich people didn’t usually like to be asked how they earned their living. But it would be even more awkward if I never asked.
“Real estate.”
That was too vague of a response. I wasn’t sure what he meant, but I didn’t want to press him on it. That could mean he invested in real estate, or maybe he was just a real estate agent. “Do you enjoy that?”
“I love it. I love finding people the right home. It’s rewarding and exciting.”
So he was a real estate agent. To live in a big house like that, he had to be one of the best in the area. “Well, whenever I’m ready to buy a house, maybe you could help me out.”
“I’d love to. Instead of giving me a commission, you could give me something else.” He sent me a quick wink.
I was pinching my pennies so I could afford to move out of the apartment across the hall from my ex, so I would take any discount I could find. “You’ve got a deal. So, how long has your sister been living with you?”
He released a quiet sigh, like the question stirred up resentment. “Too long. She’s been living with me on and off for a few years now. She’s much younger than me, so she stayed with me while she went to college. Now that she’s getting married, she and her fiancé are moving in to a place in my neighborhood, but it’s not ready yet. That means I’m stuck with her until I hand her off to her husband.” He spoke about her like she was a pain, but in my limited interaction with her, she seemed really sweet, so I doubted he disliked her that much.
“Do your parents live in another state?” I kept eating, interested in the way he discussed his relationship with his sister. As an only child, I couldn’t relate to that situation at all. I’d always been alone.
“No.” He suddenly grew quiet and cleared his throat. “They passed away almost ten years ago.” He shifted his gaze down and looked at his fries before he placed a few into his mouth. He brushed it off like it was nothing, but his eyes held a moment of sadness. Whenever he smiled, he looked even more handsome. But when he frowned, he seemed empty. “Car accident. Drunk driver.”
“I’m so sorry…” My hand immediately darted across the table and rested on his. My heart broke for his parents, people I didn’t even know. Losing one parent must have been hard enough, but losing two was unbearable. It resonated with me down to my core, stirred up heartbreak that I tried to forget. I’d never had parents either, so I knew his pain—all too well.
“Thank you.” He didn’t pull his hand away from mine. “I was in my early twenties, and Sasha was still in high school. I became her guardian, and she lived with me through college. After she graduated, she moved out for a short time, but rent became too much and she didn’t like living alone, so she came back.”
“That’s really sweet of you.”
He pulled his hand away and shrugged it off. “She’s my sister, so I didn’t mind. But I’m glad to have my space once she gets married. Her fiancé is a good guy, so that’s a relief. I’m happy to hand her off to him.”
“You sound like her father.”
He shrugged. “I kinda am, honestly.” He picked at a few more fries before he lifted his gaze to look into mine. “I didn’t mean to bring down the energy. Tell me something about yourself.”
He’d shown a side to himself that I didn’t know existed. When I saw him walk into my lingerie shop, I’d just assumed he was a playboy who got whatever he wanted. As I peeled back the layers, I realized I was completely wrong. This man was kind, compassionate, and loving. “I lost my parents too…” It was easier than the whole truth.
He stilled at my words, his eyes softening into a deep look of sadness.
“And I know exactly how you feel.”
Colton placed the chips and salsa on the coffee table, along with a bowl of pretzels. It seemed like he was having a small get-together rather than inviting his brother to live with him for a few weeks.
“Trying to make a good impression?” I teased.
He handed me a cold beer before he twisted off the cap of his own. “I haven’t seen him in three years. If we don’t have anything to say, at least we can eat to make it less awkward.” He grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. “What game do you think he’d want to see?”
“Depends. What kind of sports does he like?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. I think anything.”
“Well, the Trail Blazers are playing the Rockets right now.”
“Alright.” He started flipping through the channels. “What channel is that…?”
How did I not know he was gay? “ESPN.”
He kept hitting the button on the remote, flipping through reruns of Seinfeld and Friends. “That doesn’t help me. Give me a number.”
“Oh my god.” I snatched the remote from his hand and hit the guide button. “Look, the name of the station is to the left. All you have to do is scroll down until you find it. And then, boom.” I hit the button, and then the game was on. “You can pass the bar, but you don’t know how to use the TV.”
“I’m sorry I don’t have the ESPN channel memorized like you,” he said as he rolled his eyes.
“Well, if you want to impress Aaron or anyone else, you should try to get this down.”
“What makes you assume he even likes sports?”
Sometimes I worried Colton wouldn’t survive out there in the real world. “You met him at a sports bar…”
“Well, I was there too, and I don’t like sports.”
“If your brother is a fan, then you’re going to have to learn if you want him to be comfortable here for a few weeks.”
“When I tell him I’m gay, I’m sure that will lower his expectations for his visit.” He sat back in the cushions and took a big drink. “Man, I’m so nervous. Finn has won like a million medals for his service, and he’s such a…macho man. He might storm out once I tell him.” He rubbed his fingers across his forehead as he massaged the muscles around his eyebrows.
“That doesn’t matter. He’s your brother—your blood. Don’t assume he’s going to judge you.”
“Well, most people do judge me.” He sat up and set his beer on the table. “Do you know how many people have given me shit for leaving you? Like, I’m a superfreak for not being attracted to you?”
“Well…” I pointed to myself, trying to break the tension with a joke. “Look at me.”
Thankfully, it worked, and a smile spread across his face.
“Your brother loves you, Colton. He wouldn’t have asked to stay here unless he wanted to be here.
You being gay isn’t going to change anything.”
“I really hope you’re right.”
“If he gives you a hard time about it, I’ll set him straight. You’ve always got me in your corner.”
“Thank god,” he said. “I wouldn’t be able to survive without you.” His sincerity always touched me because he was so honest about it. He still relied on me the way I relied on him.
“And I wouldn’t be able to survive without you.”
Before I finished taking another sip of my beer, a knock sounded on the door.
Colton tensed in trepidation all over again, his shoulders straightening in fear and his eyes widening to the size of marbles. “Shit, that’s him.”
“Don’t act surprised. You knew he was coming.”
He stood up and smoothed out the front of his t-shirt, not that his brother would care how he was dressed. He fixed his hair too, like he was nervous to meet the Queen of England instead of his own flesh and blood.
“Jesus, stop being dramatic.” I grabbed his elbow and walked to the door with him. “You’re overreacting. So just chill out and be yourself. Even if he has a problem with it, that’s his prerogative, not yours.”
“Yeah, okay.” He took a deep breath before he opened the door.
Finn stood on the threshold with two heavy bags over his shoulders. He was taller than Colton, with arms thick like tree trunks. Cords of veins ran from his biceps down to the tops of his hands. His sun-kissed skin suggested he spent more time outdoors than indoors.
He was not what I was expecting.
Rugged, tough, and dangerously handsome, Finn had the hardest jawline I’d ever seen. As if someone placed a knife to his throat and chiseled out his perfection, he was carved from marble. His chin was blanketed with a layer of hair from not shaving, the shadow adding to his rough exterior. The only soft aspect of his appearance was his eyes.
Crystal blue.
They examined his brother from behind a façade of mystery. Shifting back and forth slightly, he studied his flesh and blood like he was taking in his features. He wore a gray t-shirt that fit snugly over his thick arms and shoulders, and the way the fabric stretched over his huge chest made it look like a second skin. The clothing stuck against his stomach like a curtain clinging to the wall, and a faint outline of his eight-pack was noticeable. His dark jeans hung low on his hips, and his muscled thighs stretched out the fabric of his jeans. Even though his luggage must have been heavy, he didn’t sway under the weight.
It didn’t affect him at all.
One of his most prominent characteristics was his tattoos. Black ink stretched up and down his arms, various images woven together into a single canvas. There were numbers, pictures, bullets, and countries permanently written into his skin, like his body carried the story of his life in the military.
Colton seemed just as surprised by his brother’s appearance because he still didn’t speak.
I was frozen to the spot, shocked that this undeniably sexy man could be related to Colton. Colton was a beautiful man too, but he was much softer than his brother. His skin was fairer, and while he worked out, he wasn’t bursting with strength the way his brother was. Just from examining Finn’s facial features, I could tell his personality was nothing like Colton’s.
He was hard, cold, and blunt.
The silence didn’t affect Finn at all. He seemed to thrive on it, holding his brother’s gaze like he refused to speak first. His eyes were the same color as Colton’s, but since his other features were so strongly different, they didn’t look anything alike.
Colton finally found his footing. “Wow…you look big.”
Finn finally relaxed his aggressive expression, letting a ghost of a smile enter his lips. He wasn’t warm or welcoming like his brother, and that was the extent of his affection. “Nice to see you too, Colt.”
“Let me take one of your bags.” Colton pulled one off Finn’s shoulder and nearly fell to the ground under the weight. “Do you have rockets in there?”
Finn picked it up again and placed it back over his shoulder, unaffected by the weight. “Something like that.” When Colton and I stepped out of the way, Finn walked inside. He set his bags down against the wall away from the living room.
Colton knew his brother better than I did, but he seemed shocked by his transformation. “What are they feeding you over there? A cow a day?”
Finn turned back around, and this time, his eyes settled on me. Clear as a summer day, his blue eyes hinted at a beautiful sky right at noon. His gaze drilled into mine harder than a jackhammer, and he seemed to see all my secrets with just a single look. He examined me with the same intensity that he looked at his brother, but my silent interrogation seemed even more intimate. He stepped closer to me, his heavy footfalls audible on the hardwood floor. “Finn.” He extended his hand to shake mine, his eyes still glued to my face. “This moment is five years in the making.”
His hand lingered between us, but I didn’t take it. A strong instinct was telling me to keep my hand away, not to touch his large hand and feel that warm skin. His persona unnerved me in ways I couldn’t explain. A handshake felt too intimate, even though it was a common gesture between strangers.
He kept his hand extended, his gaze unreadable as he waited for my reciprocation.
I glanced at his hand again, seeing the ink that made it all the way to his wrist. My confidence had returned in the last two weeks, but now that I was standing in front of this tattooed behemoth, all of that growth had gone out the window. I finally placed my hand in his, dwarfed by his size and power, and we shook hands. “Pepper.” This was Colton’s flesh and blood, and I expected to connect with him instantly just the way I had with his parents. I expected to make a joke and hug him, but instead, I felt ice-cold and searing hot at the same time. “It’s great to finally meet you.”
He finished the handshake but continued to grip my palm, holding all the weight so I could relax in his embrace. What felt like an eternity passed, and he didn’t blink that entire time. I felt like I was a target and he was a sniper, studying my behavior so when he pulled the trigger, he wouldn’t miss. His gaze wasn’t threatening, but it was so intense that it felt like a stampede right into my private thoughts. “I’m sorry I missed the wedding.”
“Oh…don’t worry about it.” It didn’t matter anyway. We didn’t even last three years before we signed our divorce papers. My wedding was the happiest day of my life, but now it was the most ignorant day of my life. Finn didn’t miss anything, except the beginning of a marriage that was never meant to last.
He finally released my hand, and when he did, it was as cold as the first day of winter.
Colton watched the entire exchange but didn’t seem alarmed by it. He must not have picked up on the intense feelings in my chest, the strange sensation that was coursing through my blood. I couldn’t tell if I was afraid of Finn, aroused by him, or something else entirely. “Let me show you your room,” Colton said.
Finn didn’t greet him with a handshake or a hug. He didn’t seem like the affectionate type, not one to walk into a room and greet everyone he knew warmly. He didn’t seem like an asshole, but he didn’t seem hospitable either. “Couch is fine, man.”
“I have a guest room,” Colton answered. “No point in wasting it.”
“In that case…” He picked up both of his bags and followed his brother down the hallway.
Now that I had a second to myself, I could recover from what I’d just experienced. It was spiritual, packed with mild adrenaline, and it made me feel so many things at once that I wasn’t entirely sure what I felt at all.
Finn didn’t drink beer.
He drank scotch—a lot of it.
He didn’t touch the snacks Colton put on the table, and most of the time, he directed his stare to the basketball game on the TV. Colton and I finished our beers in about half an hour, but Finn had three glasses of scotch—and seemed unaffected by it. He turned back to his brother but didn’t say anythin
g, preferring silence over conversation.
He was definitely the strong and silent type.
He made me uneasy, but I couldn’t put my thumb on why. He was confident in his skin, confident in awkward silence. He stepped into a room with his brother and a stranger but still retained all the power.
Colton attempted to make conversation. “How does it feel to be back?”
Finn swirled his drink slightly before he took a drink. “Not sure yet.”
We both waited for him to elaborate, but nothing was forthcoming.
“Are you home for good?” Colton asked.
“My service is finished.” He set the glass back on the table, making sure it sat on a coaster even though Colton didn’t care if he used one or not. “I’m a civilian now.”
Maybe Colton was right. Finn might not be as open-minded as I thought. He was so tough and cold that he might not accept the truth.
Colton nodded but exhausted his attempt at making conversation.
So I tried. “Colton mentioned you have a job lined up. Where will you be working?” I had no idea what he did in the military, so I didn’t know what kind of skills he had. Veterans were usually desirable in the workforce, so he probably had an easy time finding work.
He turned his gaze on me—and that intensity was back. “Johns Hopkins.”
“The hospital?” I asked, unable to keep the surprise out of my voice.
Finn gave a slight nod. “The ER.”
“Are you a medic? A nurse?” Maybe that was his discipline, treating soldiers on the battlefield. It would explain why he was so withdrawn, after all the things he must have seen.
“Physician.” He took another drink of his scotch, nearly finishing his third glass.
“Oh, that’s great.” So his job was even more stressful than I assumed.
“Mom mentioned you were getting your medical license in the military,” Colton said. “That’s awesome.”
“My training is a little different from traditional education.” He held the glass between his large hands, shifting it back and forth. “I specialize in procedures in the field, working with whatever I have at the time. Mainly traumas. Johns Hopkins offered me a position in their emergency department when I left the service.”
