by Bonni Sansom
"How do you know? I mean, you said yourself, you have memory problems."
"I feel it. I had to see you. I had to tell you how I felt. I might not remember everything that happened between us, but I do know we're supposed to be together."
"Yeah, you say that now, but you might change your mind. I'm almost positive there's a little something that might make you rethink things."
"Dammit, Laine, what's it going to take for you to get it? I don't think I'm a man that begs, so I won't, but there is nothing in the world that could make me change my mind."
She turned sideways and pulled her gown tight. "Yeah? What about this? I'm pregnant."
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
He just stood there staring at her baby bump. She let go of her gown, a little self-conscious. She wanted to run down the hall and slam her door.
"Laine? Why didn't you tell me? I've been out of the hospital a long time. Why didn't you come to me?" He sat down on the sectional and dropped his head in his hands.
She hated seeing the hurt on his face, but she had her reasons and she assured herself they were valid. She took a step forward and stopped. "I ... I didn't know what to say. You told me to go. What was I supposed to do?" She felt the weight of the situation dragging her down to sit next to him. They were a hairsbreadth apart. Her hand itched to touch him, to feel the warmth of his skin. To feel the touch she so desperately yearned for. She'd waited for this moment for five months and now that it was here, she didn't know how to handle it. Her insecurities flooded her, leaving her a tangled mess inside.
His head popped up. "You were supposed to tell me. It's my baby. I remember the conversation in the truck now. I know why I got hit. I was coming after you."
A single tear slid silently down her cheek. Her chin wobbled with anguish and the knot in her throat would surely suffocate her. The images of his broken body lying in the road were fresh and new again. How could she not have told him? He was right, along with everyone else. "You ... were," she managed to say. She swiped the tear away and cleared her throat, trying to dislodge the lump. "I panicked. I didn't, no, I ... couldn't, trust another man."
He didn't turn to look at her when he said in a soft spoken voice, "Yes, you could. I wouldn't hurt you Laine, not ever." He heaved a sigh and turned to her. "I might not be rich and run in the same circles, but I love you. Isn't that enough?"
She flinched at that statement. Did he believe this was about money? "Kyle, I don't give a rat's ass about money or status."
"Well, then what's the damn problem?" He threw his hands up.
She scooted over away from him. She hadn't seen him angry and explosive at her before. "The problem is I've been left at the altar before." There, deal with that.
His face relaxed. "Why didn't you tell me? I might not have pushed." He held his hand up to his forehead and squeezed his eyes shut. "Damn, my head hurts."
She fluttered her hands, toward him. "Do we need to call the doctor? What can I do? Are you okay? Tell me and I'll do whatever you need." She dropped to her knees in front of him trying to help him. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I got you hurt. Please, Kyle, tell me what to do?"
He opened his eyes and smiled. "Now that's more like it. I love seeing you on your knees in front of me."
She slapped him on the knee and tried to get up. "You bastard, I thought something was wrong."
"My head really does hurt, but it's nothing a couple of pills can't fix. He reached out to help her up and she swatted his hand away. "Don't do that, let me help you."
She put her hand in his as he pulled her up to the couch. "Thank you. It's getting hard to move." Just then the baby kicked, giving her a start. She held her hand to the spot she felt the kick and smiled. "He's feisty today."
Kyle's eyes went wide. "It's a boy? I'm going to have a son?" He smiled and reached out to her belly. "May I?"
"Yes, I'm having a boy." She took his hand, placing it on the spot where she felt the kick. His hand felt strong and familiar to her. She could feel the heat of his hand through her nightgown. She moaned soft and low, wanting more of his touches. The baby kicked as his hand pressed firm against her. God help her, she was getting turned on.
"I felt him, baby, I felt him kick." She watched as he smiled like a kid on Christmas morning. She missed his smile, his touch, his smell, his everything. Hadn't she been secretly wishing for this day? Hadn't she wanted another chance with Kyle? Yes and yes. She wanted him like there was no tomorrow. She wanted all of him. But could she trust him to be there?
"Kyle, what are we doing? I mean, I want to believe that you'll be there, but after what I've been through, I just don't trust anyone. David left me standing there in front of everyone and I can't go through it again."
"That's right, I remember the name David. Why in the hell would he leave you standing there alone? I'm grateful he did, but I can't imagine why."
She laughed without humor. "You should remember that name, he was your doctor."
"Your David is Dr. Gross?" His brows reached his hairline.
"Yep, he's the one and the same."
He laughed and she smacked him on the arm. "What's so funny? I don't think there's anything funny about being humiliated."
He grew serious. "There is nothing funny about that, but he seems to be a bit light in the loafers to me. I just can't see the two of you together."
She sighed. "You have no idea how accurate you are."
He chuckled. "Are you serious? Then why did he ask you to marry him?"
"He said because our families expected it and I imagine he's not out yet. So please keep this to yourself. He's a good man, just not the man for me."
"You're damn right. I'm the man for you." He pointed at his chest with his thumb.
"Kyle, I just don't know. Everything has changed and I can't lose you twice. We haven't even known each other that long. So, what happens when I'm not fun anymore and I get bitchy?"
"We'll deal with it. I'm not always a bed of roses myself. We all have bad days, babe, but I'll always love you."
"Yeah, but how do you know you love me?"
"I know, because everything changed when I met you. My life had a different meaning, a purpose larger than myself. And I fought like hell to get back to you." He leaned in and kissed her forehead, while caressing her belly with his hand.
That innocent little kiss had her burning inside. Yearning to be touched as she had been, to make love with the man she loved. "Kyle, I ... I need you." She leaned in to kiss him and he backed away. Immediately she recoiled, humiliated.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa ... " he grabbed her, pulling her back to him, "I want to kiss you, more than you could possibly know, but you threw up and I would like it if you brushed your teeth first." He smiled and pulled her closer to him. She clamped her mouth shut and relaxed against him.
"Sorry, I forgot. I throw up so often I don't even think about it anymore."
He frowned. "Has it been that rough on you?"
She nodded her head. "Yes, he's a bit tough on mommy. He won't even let me eat chocolate." She exaggerated a frown.
He chuckled. "Well, we'll just have to find some other way to keep you happy."
She glanced up, looking him in the eyes. "I like the sound of that."
"Yeah, I do too. I thought for a while there I might have turned gay after knocking myself on the noggin. Every woman that came near me didn't do a thing for me, not even a semi-erection, but you ... " he glanced down to his crotch, showing a large erection through his jeans, "sweetheart, have an immediate effect on me." He swept a stray strand of hair away from her cheek, tucking it behind her ear. "Why don't you go brush up, then we can remedy my little problem."
She scoffed, "It's anything but a little problem."
She started to rise and he held her still, concern on his face. "It is okay for us to have sex, isn't it?"
She giggled. "Yes, it's fine. Just don't lie on the baby too much or he'll be all over my bladder. I already have to pee every five minutes anyway."
He squeezed her hand. "You know that I'm going to be here all the way now. I'm going to be a dad, and I intend to be there for my son and his mother."
She froze. Oh shit.
Was he proposing, or just saying he'd be there, like, as in, come over and visit? "What does that mean exactly?" She sat back down.
"It means, I'll be here, with you and ... " he hesitated, "what's his name going to be?"
"I was going to name him Kyle, after his daddy." She rubbed her belly and cradled her bump in her hands.
"Okay, I'm going to be here for Kyle and you. I like the name Kyle. Kyle Alexander Logan Jr. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" He nodded quickly and smiled.
He seemed so content, but she still didn't know his intentions. Did he mean here in her house? It wasn't as though she didn't have room, but she didn't know if living together would be such a great idea either. She loved him, she knew she did, but what if after living together, he didn't want to stick it out. She didn't think she could handle losing him twice.
"Laine? What's rolling around in that pretty little head of yours?"
She hesitated. "N-nothing, I'm just tired that's all."
"Okay, well, this I know I shouldn't believe. What are you fretting over?"
"I don't know, I'm just concerned about how our relationship will impact little Kyle."
"What does that mean?" He scrunched his brows together.
"Didn't you want me to go brush my teeth?" She pulled her arm from his grip, and headed toward her room. Kyle quickly followed suit.
"Laine, honey, please tell me what's bothering you." He snagged her shoulder and turned her to face him. "We can't keep things from each other. Not if you expect this to work."
"And what is this, Kyle? What are we doing? Because we were just having sex, but now things are so complicated. We weren't expecting a baby and now there is one. It's just that my life is such a mess right now and I don't know if I can handle much more."
He framed her face with his hands. "That's the point. You don't have to handle things alone anymore. I'm here now."
"Here in what way? Do you mean here in my house?"
"Yes, here in your house. I want to be a proper dad to my son and a proper man to you."
"Don't you think we should talk about this?"
"We just did. I'm going to be here and you're going to have help with little Kyle."
"I would love help. I have no idea what I'm doing when it comes to babies, but don't you think we're moving a bit fast?"
"No, I don't. I've made up my mind. I'll be here if you'll have me."
Pause.
"I ... I guess so. I'll need you to help out, so, yes."
Yes, she wanted to have him here to sleep with every night and wake up to every morning. She still had reservations about whether or not he would stay for the long haul. She thought about David and all of the grief she went through, but finally she knew for a fact it wasn't her fault they didn't get married. That changed things. She could picture her and Kyle standing together at the altar, pledging their love to one another. She could see the champagne colors flowing all around them. Candles and bunting, flowers and other decorations adorning an arch they would stand under, reciting their vows. Her wedding, the way it should be. She smiled at the thought. The only problem is, he hasn't asked her to marry him yet. Maybe she should propose. It was the modern thing to do.
He snickered. "I know you have those wheels turning in your head, so tell me what's going on."
"Nothing much, I'm just excited about making love to you. I've missed you."
He kissed her cheek. "Lead the way, sugar."
She turned in the direction of her bedroom and grabbed his hand pulling him along. "Come on, it's this way."
"You weren't kidding about being excited." He moved quickly keeping pace with her.
She turned her head. "You're damn right I wasn't."
They reached her bedroom and he waited while she went to the bathroom to brush. When she came out, he was already naked lying on her bed. Damn, his body was amazing. His chiseled physique was astonishing. His ropey arms would hold her so tight. His soft masculine lips gave her gooseflesh just thinking about them kissing her body. He was absolute perfection come to life. No longer was he broken and battered, but a healthy virile man. Her man.
His erection thick and long was rigid against his belly. He stroked it up and down as she approached the bed. She could see the tiny bead of pre-come in the slit. Her mouth watered to taste it. His salty-sweet taste would burst on her tongue.
"I have something I need you to take care of." He stroked himself again, giving an "mmm," of satisfaction. "You're a bit overdressed. Take off that gown and let me see that gorgeous body."
"It's not so gorgeous anymore." She crossed her arms, grabbed the hem, and yanked it over her head. A bit self-conscious with the gown gone she covered herself with her hands.
He frowned. "Don't hide yourself from me baby. I love your body like this. Our child has made you more beautiful than ever." His hot palm rubbed across her belly, making her quiver. She could feel her damp need between her legs. She remembered masturbating in the bathtub and blushed.
"Don't be embarrassed. I love you just the way you are."
She crawled on the bed. "I'm not embarrassed, I'm horny. It's a side effect of pregnancy, so it's a good thing you showed up when you did."
He pulled her head down for a possessive, demanding, curl-your-toes-and-make-you-cream, kind of kiss. God, she had missed him.
Their tongues danced together in a sensual duel, igniting a fire inside her. She reached down and stroked him from root to tip, while she kissed him senseless.
He broke the kiss. "Damn, baby, I love the way you touch me." He closed his eyes and pumped in time with her strokes up and down his cock.
She licked his flat nipple as she fondled his balls in her hand. She wanted to please him.
"How should we do this? I don't want to hurt you or the baby." He looked a bit stressed, like he wasn't the, 'in control' Kyle she'd always known. He had always taken her in hand and commanded her body, but now he seemed apprehensive. She decided to take matters into her own hands, quite literally. She reached down using two fingers to rub her clit while the other flicked her nipple. "Mmm, this feels good, Kyle."
Kyle was on top of her in a nanosecond. "Don't stop touching yourself. I want you to come for me." He put his head down between her legs, licking her seam. She was ready. He could taste her arousal on his tongue. He licked his lips. "Now this, I remember." He opened her delicate tissue, exposing her little hole and lapped her juice up like a starving man. His tongue fucked her in and out, eliciting tiny whimpers from her. He wanted to see her face, but the baby bump was in the way. He watched her fingers make swirling patterns on her clit and swore under his breath. Damn, she's sexy. He licked her fingers. "Let me take over, babe." He moved up and licked her hard nubbin with the flat of his tongue. He had to hold her hips just to keep her still. She writhed in his hands, seeking more pleasure. Pleasure he was willing to give. This was his dream every night since he'd been home. The dream he couldn't quite remember, but haunted him relentlessly.
"Mmm, that feels so good. Whatever you do, don't stop." She rolled her hips in time with his strokes, making little mewling sounds that were torturing him.
He needed her hands on him, her lips, that velvety wet tongue licking his cock, sucking, taking him all the way in. He wanted to love her with his body and soul, to show her through pleasure, how much he cared. She was his goddess, his life, hopefully his wife.
He hummed, vibrating his tongue directly on her clit. She squealed and shattered in his hands. He lapped greedily at her juice, taking in her very essence.
She tried slamming her knees shut as he continued his sensual assault on her pussy, making her squeal again.
"Please, sir, I need you inside me now."
"Sir. Damn, I love that." He came up on his knees, spread her creamy white legs further apart, and
dipped in one excruciating inch at a time. He felt the little aftershocks of her orgasm, massaging his cock, pulling him closer than he wanted to be to his own orgasm. He tried thinking of other things to keep his mind occupied. The foot bone's connected to the leg bone. The leg bone's connected to my cock. Ah shit, I'm gonna come.
His pumps became shallow and uneven rubbing against her clit with each stroke. He watched her eyes making sure he didn't hurt her, but rather gave her pleasure. His balls were slapping her ass with every thrust. He felt the telltale tingle in his spine, his balls drew up and he pumped two more times and came inside her, calling her name.
He fell on his elbows keeping his weight off of her, and then rolled to his side, pulling her into him. He placed his hand on her belly, feeling a small movement. His son was growing in her womb, and he couldn't be happier. Now all he had to do was get his mama to agree to marry him. He had an idea, but he would have to hurry before they closed. He had to go get her the ultimate gift.
"Babe? Are you awake?"
"Mm hmm, but just barely. That was exactly what I needed. I'm going to need it again after my nap." She snuggled her butt into him, causing him another erection. What he wouldn't give to take her again right now, but he needed to go.
"I need to go, so take a nap and I'll be back before you know it."
She stiffened. "Go? Why do you need to go? I just got you back and you're leaving me already? What, you just needed a fuck to hold you over?"
He cupped her chin in his hand and turned her head. "I'm not leaving you ever again and no, I didn't need a fuck. I needed to make love to you. And I just need to go out for a bit."
"Okay, but you better come back. I mean it. I can't go through losing you again. Jeff kept me away from you, so please don't tell him we're together."
"What do you mean he kept you away from me?" Anger hot and red burned inside him.
"He wouldn't let me come and see you in the hospital. He blamed me for you being in there, so he had me banned. I wanted to be there for you, so I snuck in and that's when you told me to go away." She was rigid and trying to pull away from him.
