by Holly May
Hearing that voice just behind him, he tried not to flinch. Gathering his breath, he turned around. Faye stared up at him, her green eyes wide. Not much older than him, Faye was slim, her brown hair perfectly styled and as always, she brandished a bright pair of heels. Orange, this time.
He forced a smile. Just because she once insulted him directly because of his prominent position in New York didn’t mean he wouldn’t be polite.
“Faye. I’m on my way back to the ranch. Don’t have time to stop and chat, sorry.”
“Yes, yes, I know you’ve been very busy getting up to speed for the big opening.” Faye smiled broadly. “You’ve got a photographer there. Rachel Mills, am I right?”
He paused, surprised. “Do you know her?”
“I know of her. Actually, many of us do. When you were busy out of town, her family got a bad name around here. Best keep an eye on her.”
Now she was going to insult Rachel. Just what he needed. He felt his upper lip curl. “Look, it’s not my concern what reputation she has. She’s proven herself to be a good woman. If you’ll excuse me, I need to get going.”
He walked off before she could get another word in. This was why he chose to stay within Mountainbrook, he didn’t need the small talk many occupied themselves with. Despite what Faye had said, he wouldn’t think badly of Rachel or her family. Still, it bothered him that the woman knew about Rachel working for him. He’d tried to keep that under wraps.
Rachel’s past and whatever happened with her family wasn’t of any concern. He didn’t judge her, well, he’d been too harsh when he said he had his reservations because of her trespassing.
He didn’t mean it that way. And all this time he’d been tearing himself up mentally trying to settle on some way to make it up to her.
She hadn’t taken it well; he’d noticed it in the way her eyes had widened and lost their glimmer. He needed to be more careful with his words, something he was still working on.
Gentle words bring life and health; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.
A verse from Proverbs that still held deep meaning for him. For too long, he’d talked badly of and to others. Before he was a Christian, that is. Even now, several years later, he could slip up and hurt someone.
Rachel was the last person he wanted to hurt.
Clenching the paper bag, he opened the door and climbed in, setting it aside. Today, he’d do more than his best to show Rachel how much she truly mattered.
Instead of entering the ranch house, Rachel followed the faded dirt trail embedded with hoof prints toward the stables. No doubt Jared would be there, alone. She stopped at the doorway, the scent of hay and horses thick in the air, her nose numb from the late morning’s chill.
Taking a breath, she stepped inside. She caught sight of Jared shoveling hay and even with the sound of her boots echoing, he didn’t turn around. Not until she stood a foot away from him, and Caramel snorted as if announcing her presence.
Jared finally glanced over his shoulder, surprise igniting in his eyes. “Rachel! Didn’t expect you so soon after your interview.”
“Well, I have a contract to keep. And I…need to talk to you.”
He stripped off his work gloves, exposing rough hands. “How are you feeling?”
Confused. Frustrated. She wanted to mention their kiss, but couldn’t bring herself to. It would unravel all the emotional barriers she’d built, excuses that sounded rational last night - until now.
“I’m good,” she forced out, mustering false cheer. “I think I can ride today, but I’m aware of my limits.”
He set the pitchfork down and closed the distance between them. “You got complacent. Happened to me. It took a nasty fall and a badly bruised elbow for me to realize I’m not invincible. It’s straightforward to get set in a routine, comfortable and secure, and when something like that happens, it really shakes you up.”
His admittance of failure stunned her. As she knew, he wasn’t one to admit personal weaknesses. “You continued working here, you didn’t give up.”
“I had no choice.”
“Everyone has a choice.”
He let out a sigh, shoulders sagging, highlighting his fatigue. “I didn’t mean what I said yesterday, about you leaving. I like having you here. So does my father. It’d mean a lot to both of us if you accept the job in October.”
Rachel smiled, touched by his apology. She’d understood it was a stressful situation at the time, and forgave him. “If I’m working in Spokane, I’ll consider dropping by.”
“What do I need to do to persuade you to take it?”
He stepped in close enough for her to feel the heat from his breath, and she looked up at him, taken by his imposing gaze, the utter strength visible in his body.
“I can think of one thing,” she murmured.
She searched his face. There was no sign he was affected by the cold, his skin smoothly tanned, his pearl white smile deliciously tempting. Then his kiss stole her next breath, his lips colliding with hers, firm and demanding. She was swept away by the heat of his mouth molding to hers, and retaliated gently.
Pulling away, she drew in a breath. “I’m convinced.”
“That was easy, then.”
She laughed. “Just so you know, even without the kiss, I still would’ve said yes.”
He nodded, as if understanding her implication.
“Good. I had some more tricks up my sleeve, just in case.” He winked. “Okay. Since you’re early, you can get some photos of the barn for me? This place holds a lot of memories.”
A smile came easily. She enjoyed that he’d become open and willing about her photography. “Of course.”
“Great. How’d your interview go, by the way?”
“I’ll get a call this morning. Thought I’d either stay home and worry about it, or come by and surprise you.”
“Good call.”
“I’m glad to have your support.”
His expression softened. “You have a lot more than that.”
She took him in, almost in wonder. It’s really progressed to this.
He cleared his throat, looking sheepish. “Anyway, I’ve got an idea. It’s just something to show you that I hope you’ll like. Let me sweep you off your feet, literally.”
Jared seemed full of surprises. Not that she’d complain.
“Go ahead.”
He lifted her into his arms, the bulges of his muscles pressing into her, and carried her down the centre aisle to a ladder partially concealed by a wooden beam. He lifted her up, his hands burning through her, and she grasped the sides of the ladder. After climbing up, she emerged in a small hay loft. It was quiet. Secluded. Immersing herself in the dust strewn straw, she faced Jared.
A sudden memory of Aaron’s insensitive dismissal came to mind. The moment Aaron came home during his birthday, she’d surprised him with his favorite dinner and a cake she’d labored hours to make, decorated with flowers from her mom’s florist store. She’d thrown everything she had into their relationship only to be met with reluctance.
His words came back to her. I pretended to love you.
The harsh recollection faded as she met Jared’s gaze. He wouldn’t hurt her like that. Already the difference when he touched her, kissed her, made that obvious.
The hay felt spindly and uncomfortable, which would be exacerbated the longer she sat on it. She tried to sit and flinched, sinking further into the mass of straw.
“I have some blankets in storage.” Jared reached up to a small alcove above some shelving. “I used to come out here as a kid when my parents argued. Fell asleep to the sounds of the horses. Sunlight used to stream through there and wake me up.”
Her heart raced. Hearing that glimpse of his past heightened her curiosity about him but she wasn’t certain he’d reveal more right now.
“I can see why you’d make this your hideaway. Sorry to hear about your parents, though.”
He shrugged. “They weren’t happy together. Hence the
divorce. Anyway, thought it’d be a nice view, or angle, whatever you need for photos.”
She surveyed the stalls, the horses below, and realized he was right. “It’s ideal. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Anything to make you smile.” He laid a blue woolen blanket over a hay bale and gestured for her to sit.
“You’re giving me ideas…” she joked.
He laughed. A loud whinny came from below and despite Jared being close, she stiffened.
Noticing her reaction, Jared froze. While he wanted Rachel to feel special, everything he knew she deserved to feel, now he saw through his rashness. He hesitated, feeling his face crease from disappointment. “You still aren’t comfortable around the horses, are you?”
Rachel touched his cheek. Her smooth caress felt gentle, assuring. “I don’t mind. For a moment, I forgot where we were and hesitated. That’s all. I’m fine.”
“I worry that it’ll be too much. That I’ve pushed you too much over the week.”
She sat down and chewed her bottom lip. “Jared, just to put this out there, we didn’t start off on the best of terms. I trespassed. You wanted me to come back. But I’ve overcome what I was most afraid of and despite what I said, it’s not a mistake. Everything I’ve shared with you…I acted the way I did because it all means a lot to me.”
He lowered his gaze and chose to sit next to her. For Rachel to forgive his arrogance and see it as a blessing, he felt a rush of admiration for her. She was open to him about her feelings, encouraging him to do the same, but he knew she had to be wary of the barn, the horses. He’d overstepped in some aspects.
“I was being unfair.” Thinking of how she wanted to leave, something that bothered him more than he’d liked, he pointed out, “Anyway, yesterday you said you deserved the charges.”
He’d been pondering what Faye had mentioned at the market. Surely not everyone perceived her badly?
Rachel brushed back her hair. “You may not believe me, but trespassing’s my only offense.”
“I believe that.” He didn’t hesitate.
He couldn’t associate her with the initial image of a wanton, careless woman with a criminal record and bad intentions. The stereotype that Faye attempted to portray her as. How irrational he’d been to assume, even briefly, that Rachel resembled Tania. He wouldn’t be winning any awards for restraint, because piece by piece, she had broken down the wall he’d erected, and when he looked into her eyes, he felt a foreign rush of emotion sear from deep within.
“You really believe me, just like that?” She frowned.
He swallowed, trying to keep his thoughts in line. “Yeah. I take you for your word. You didn’t lie to me when we met. I don’t expect you ever would.”
“That’s...very noble of you. I can’t help think the worst of others sometimes. Especially when it comes to my sister, my mom, and how they were treated. Nothing got any better.”
“I can imagine. People like you keep my faith in humanity.”
Her blue eyes widened, but still shone softly. “I trespassed, and you still think highly of me?”
“Sure. You had many chances to screw me over, but you didn’t. I gave you a chance and you amaze me with what you’ve done. How you’ve changed my life.”
Rachel flinched, yet held his gaze. “Would you still feel that way if you knew about the Mills? What people have said about us?”
“I wouldn’t listen to anyone other than you.”
“Okay. Thank you.” She lowered her head into her hands before straightening. “Megan, my sister, her fiancé Matt dabbled in white collar crimes across the country. She ended up in court accused of aiding him but wasn’t found guilty. The amount of times her name featured in the news, the few court appearances…it hurt my parents badly.”
Jared leaned closer and she stayed still. He brushed a thumb across her soft lips. She obviously loved her family wholeheartedly, something he couldn’t relate to and had struggled with even with God’s help.
Yet now he understood her occasionally erratic behavior. She’d been nervous that he would place charges all this time, and with utter foolishness, he realized the way he’d been yesterday hadn’t made it any easier for her. No wonder she looked hurt. She obviously thought he didn’t want her around when all he’d tried to say was that he was being guarded for a reason.
“I’m sorry I even made the comment about taking you to court. I never would. You have my word.”
Tears threatened to come forth as Rachel thought of the attentiveness and consideration he’d displayed. He was protective, strong and devoted. He’d be the ideal man to spend a lifetime with. Just not hers.
He lowered his head, his breath intermingling with hers as his lips traced the seam of her own. She lingered in the kiss before backing away. “As I said, I felt like I deserved it.”
“Do you regret it?”
“No. Otherwise we wouldn’t have met.”
He grinned. “Good answer.”
“I guess I still feel guilty about it, of course. I damaged your fence. I put cattle at risk.”
“Sorry, I actually meant to see to it before you turned up. I know you still feel bad about it. I’ve forgiven you. What you’ve done by being in my life has far outweighed a broken fence.”
Rachel nodded slowly, accepting his words. And she felt that bright spark within her again, the consistent faith she thought she’d lost had been renewed.
Looking into his eyes with newfound confidence, she murmured, “Likewise. Maybe we could take a walk, get some fresh air?”
“Yeah. Come up here anytime you want to take photos. No need to ask permission.”
She shuffled past him and made her way down the ladder. It creaked beneath her feet and she hit the ground, Jared joining her soon after.
“I won’t pass photos by you, I’ll be busy selecting the right ones for October, but I’d still really like your opinion.”
“Happy to do that.” Jared adjusted his Stetson, gesturing for her to follow him out of the stables. They wandered the grounds in silence for a few minutes, watching the rising sun coloring the sky.
He cleared his throat. “I’ve worked for three years running this ranch, taking on all the responsibilities that weren’t intended to be mine. I haven’t delayed them for anyone in a long time.”
She got the feeling he was confiding in her as a way to apologize for his inhibition. She swallowed, noticing pain crease his face. Pain that echoed within her from knowing they’d found each other at the wrong time.
“Jared...”
He raised his chin. “First thing my father said to me when I came here was that if I didn’t pull my weight, he wouldn’t consider me worthy of the Weston name.”
Shock overcame her. “But you’re his son!”
“I was adopted when I was seven.” His lips thinned, a sudden vulnerability on full display. “My biological parents were drug users, so I have no intentions of getting in touch with them. Their mistreatment led to me being dumped in foster care. I didn’t have to wait long to be taken in, but those months of being an orphan, my future in turmoil, left a mark. My foster mother was infertile, so she couldn’t have children even though she wanted to. As for my dad, his love for the ranch, and God, meant more.”
Hence the arguments he’d mentioned and the tension between the two of them. It all made sense. She stepped in front of him, placing her hands on his chest, needing to feel him. “Oh, Jared. I can’t imagine any father mistreating his son, adopted or not. The whole situation would’ve been frustrating for all of you.”
“It was.” His jaw clenched. “I’ve worked tirelessly to gain his approval, for him to acknowledge what I’ve sacrificed but it seems only by taking ownership of the ranch will he be happy. He wants me to stay, but I’ve arranged to return to New York.”
The animosity in his voice surprised her. “Why? You regret being here?”
“No, but time hasn’t lessened my desire to return to New York. Don’t get me wrong, I love worki
ng here.” He folded his arms. “But when I was in the orphanage, I had a dream of making it big as a financial investor. It was all that drove me during that time. The opportunity’s still open for me, and it’s exactly what I prayed for.”
She couldn’t doubt how much he loved ranch work, but the distance with his father tainted it. An outlook she now knew stemmed from his forlorn past. He’d endured a difficult upbringing, but it was nothing that couldn’t be overcome.
“Your father loves you, I’ve seen it. And you’ve done so much for Mountainbrook. What if you’re making the wrong choice?”
“You seem so intent on getting me to stay. Why?” His blue eyes were gentle, also sharp.
Because I have feelings for you. But she didn’t think that would be enough to convince him, not yet.
“I’ve followed my passions my whole life. I don’t like seeing you deny yours. I think you’re more zealous about the ranch than you let yourself believe.”
Jared smiled. “Yeah, guess I am. But sometimes sacrifices have to be made. You live with a full heart. I’ve lived with restraints, expectations and disappointment and I learned to lock my heart away long ago.” He let out a breath. “Rachel, it won’t end the way you hope. I’m leaving. All my father wants is for me to give up my life for this place.”
Stubborn man. “He wants you to be happy. Don’t torture yourself over the past. It’s there to make you better, not bitter.”
“Spoken from experience?”
She smiled tightly, feeling his chest rise and fall beneath her hands, overcome by sympathy. “It’s what my mom used to say. It was her way to cope before she found my dad.”
“There’s some wisdom to it.” He removed his Stetson and ran a hand through his hair. “I’ve been against the renovations, the conversion to a dude ranch, because I worry about him. He’s a changed man after the accident. He’s not as bad as he used to be but I worry how he’ll handle it. He’s still my father, if not by blood.”
Rachel nodded. She knew not to ask him to stay. He’d obviously made his decision, yet her heart ached for them - Jared was tormented over the need to impress his foster father while being blind to how Derek cared for him. He sought a love that he also closed himself off from, a love that he’d find so easily once he opened his heart.
