“Shut up,” I whispered while grabbing him and slowly piercing his throat with the knife. “Do as I say and walk to the sound of my voice until I say stop.” About a half mile down, there was new construction and a manmade hole was in the middle of a dirt pile.
“Let me go,” he begged again.
“No; you have a taste for young girls. Did you give your victims mercy? How many?” I asked.
“What?”
“Tell me how many there were. I’m not going to ask you again,” I assured him.
“Twenty-two,” he said while peeing in his pants.
“Did you kill anyone?” I asked.
“No, I swear. Please, let me go,” he begged again.
His face was covered in blood. I took the torch out of my backpack and lit his body up with it. He fell to the ground. With my black gloves on, I rolled his body into the hole.
Knowing George he would still be up. I made it just in time to watch old episodes of Saturday Night Live with him. Fera greeted me at the door.
“Hey, baby,” I said after picking her up and petting her.
“What did you get from the store?” George asked.
“I got a few things for myself but I picked up Ben & Jerry’s crème brûlée ice cream, your favorite. I noticed you were out of it,” I said while taking it out of the plastic grocery bag.
“It’s just what I’m in the mood for. Thank you, Angela,” he replied.
“You’re most certainly welcome,” I said, handing him a bowl of ice cream and a spoon.
Little moments as these I hoped George wouldn’t forget. Time likes these I needed to cherish the most.
Chapter 23
Business
“I was pondering whether we should recruit new girls,” Heather suggested while she was using the elliptical machine at the gym.
“I don’t know. More people mean more money coming out of our pockets. Plus, you and I have hearts. Heather, I refuse to be in this business longer than I need to. Our distorted vision of helping people will make us want to stay longer in this tangled web of providing pleasure,” I replied before taking a sip of my bottled water and wiping off the sweat on my face with a hand towel.
“Come on, just think about it. I met these girls at the nail salon. They’re students just trying to make extra money. Besides, I don’t need them to actually have sex with clients,” she said.
“What else would you have them do?” I questioned.
“Maybe just have them for dating services only. We could make it clear with the clients: no extras. I’m sure Jacob wouldn’t mind finding a few nice gentlemen to escort them on the dates. Of course, the client will not know or realize someone is watching from afar.”
“We are still putting out more. This time, we will be spending more money on security expenses. Besides, we haven’t reached our goal for a down payment on a building. We are so close, though,” I added.
“Well, I’m just trying to appeal to the fellow consumer.”
“How old are these girls?” I asked.
“They told me eighteen and nineteen. My gut tells me they’re probably fifteen and sixteen trying to explore a new adventure,” she said.
“No one under the age of eighteen will work for us!” I screamed.
“Angela, what the hell is wrong with you? Keep your voice down,” Angela requested.
“Young girls have no idea what they want. They are so impressionable at their ages,” I said, shaking my head, in tears.
“Angela, what happened to you—”
“Don’t!” I warned, cutting her off.
“Who hurt you as a young girl, or maybe a little girl?”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said.
“Angela, at times you have dozed off asleep at the so-called desk in Jacob’s house. I have heard your ramblings of the ‘no’s’ and the ‘stops.’ Plus, I will never forget your whimpering cries in the night,” she explained.
“I gotta go. See you tonight,” I said before grabbing my towel. The room was spinning because I had not eaten anything. My hands were shaking. After I got outside of the building, I started taking deep breaths. I ran to the car to pop a pill.
Chapter 24
Changes
I was staring at myself in the mirror. Now, I realized what it meant when a woman said she had bags under her eyes. I hadn’t slept in days. The nightmares were increasing. My back was against the wall to seek treatment. Maybe the psychiatrist could help me. Having anxiety attacks shouldn’t have been an addition to my lifestyle.
The shrink wanted me to face my fears. To be honest, I was too petrified to uncover what lay deep in my mind, heart, and soul.
Today was moving day for George and the animals. Between two farmers, the animals were divided up. George could buy a small townhouse with the profit that he made. He tried to offer me some money but I declined. The way I saw it, he and Joyce saved me. The least I could do was take care of him.
George had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. Looking back, I did remember some minor incidents. On a Sunday afternoon, George couldn’t remember his way home after leaving a church service, and a few times he forgot to feed the pigs and chickens. I had noticed that his new medication only slowed down the progression of the disease. It would be heart wrenching if one day he simply didn’t recognize my face or little Fera’s face anymore.
Since Heather could handle a night without me, I stayed with George in his new apartment. To his face, I acted like I was so happy for the new change. Deep down, my heart longed for the way things were growing up. Joyce would have never agreed to leave the farm. She would have continued to work until the day her body wouldn’t let her anymore. Still, the adult in me understood that George deserved to be happy.
Chapter 25
Road Trip
I was heading down I-95 to Charlotte, North Carolina to visit with Maureen’s family. I didn’t come empty-handed. I baked a raspberry tart. Joyce always taught me ladies must always bring a gift when being invited to someone’s home as a guest. When I was young girl, she and I would have our very own tea parties. There, she would teach me the proper etiquette at the dinner table. It took many pleadings, but, eventually, Joyce would let me start wearing her hats to the table and getting dressed up. I loved pretending with her that she was the queen of Suffolk and I was the upcoming princess being groomed to one day have her throne.
Two exits away from my destination, I stopped at a nearby rest stop to use the bathroom. It was a quaint rest stop with picnic tables and a small convenience store set up around it. As I got out of the car, I noticed my tire was flat. Damn it. I didn’t want to be late to Maureen’s house.
“I can fix it. Do you have a spare?” a gentleman asked, approaching me and pointing to the tire.
“Yes, it’s in the trunk.” I nodded.
“Give me a few minutes and I can get you on your way, young lady. I have four daughters. My middle one is probably around the same age as you. If they were in some kind of distress, I would want a kind-hearted man to help them too. In fact, I’m waiting on two of my daughters and my wife to come out of the bathroom, now,” he explained.
“Thank you. I’m Angela, by the way,” I said.
“My name is Norman,” he replied as we shook hands.
After making small talk with Norman for a few minutes, his family came out of the bathroom. His family was so nice and warm to me. His daughters were lucky to have them as parents.
Years ago, I revealed to Joyce that I was curious about my father. She mentioned to me he would have been proud of me. Maybe he was looking down from heaven watching over me. As memories play back in my mind, Joyce did drop hints of the truth.
“Thank you. I really appreciate your help,” I said and got back into the car to pull off.
An hour later and with one more exit to go, I thought I heard state police sirens.
“Ma’am, I need your license and registration,” the state trooper ordered me after I sl
owly rolled down the window.
“Yes,” I agreed, handing over what he had requested. The car was beginning to spin slightly. My body temperature began to rise.
“Ma’am, your state inspection sticker has expired. It’s only been seven days so I’m going to let you go. Also, you were not wearing your seat belt,” he explained.
After he finished talking, I revealed to him my matching plum-colored bra and panty set. I started to unbutton my petite polo shirt. I unclipped my bra in the front. The woods were right behind us. I quickly ran into the woods. He followed me. I quickly took off my jeans. He unbuttoned his belt to take down his pants. He ran his fingers from my neck all the way down to my feet. His tongue began playing with my left nipple. He picked me up to ride me against the tree.
“Harder,” I demanded.
It was over before it began. It was the best quickie I’ve ever had. I came so fast and so did he.
“Wow,” he said, watching me adjust my clothes to a decent manner.
“Have a nice day,” I said, heading to the car, and then pulled off.
I had finally reached Maureen’s house.
“Please come in,” Maureen greeted me at the door. Thankfully, the events of the day didn’t throw me up off schedule.
“May I use your bathroom?” I asked while handing her the tart that I had prepared. I wanted to wash my face and freshen up before meeting the rest of her family. Baby wipes and travel-size soap, washcloths and deodorant did wonders for me.
“Of course you can. Go straight down the hall then make a left,” she explained.
When I went to use the bathroom, all I could think about was my mother and how Maureen would ask me more questions about a woman who was a monster. She longed to understand our mother even more. I couldn’t give her the answers she wanted to hear.
“You can do this,” I said before looking in the mirror at myself, taking a deep breath, and stepping out of the bathroom, heading toward the living room.
“Who is this lovely little lady?” I asked, giving Maureen’s daughter a hug.
“My name is Jade,” she said.
“My name is Jordan,” her son said. I gave him a hug as well.
“Well, it’s nice to meet the both of you,” I replied.
“Angela, this is my husband, Tom,” Maureen said. I shook his hand.
“This is a real treat for you to visit us,” he added.
“Thank you. The road trip was nice coming up.”
“You didn’t tell me that you were a baker. I can’t wait to cut into that tart you made,” Maureen said.
“My paternal grandmother taught me how to cook, bake, fry, and sew,” I said. We all started laughing.
“Well, dinner is ready,” Maureen announced.
“I’m hungry,” Jade said, running to the table. We were all seated.
“Lord, let us give thanks for this meal and please bless the hands that prepared it. We are truly glad to have Maureen and Angela united. In Jesus’ name, we pray,” Tom said.
“Amen,” everyone said in unison.
Maureen had made pork loin with roasted vegetables and mashed potatoes. I was glad because I needed something hearty on my stomach. I hadn’t really eaten all day.
After dinner, I helped Maureen with the dishes. Afterward, we went and sat down in her study to talk. “Thank you for inviting me to dinner. You have a lovely family and home,” I said.
“You’re welcome. I’m hoping you can come more often. So who has Fera? You could have brought her with you,” she added.
“She is with one of my friends. I didn’t bring her because I didn’t know how your family would feel about a dog running around the house. “
“The kids have been begging Tom and me for a dog. The next time you make it this way, please bring Fera so we can get some practice time in.” She giggled.
“I will,” I agreed.
“So, Miss College Graduate, what are your plans?” Maureen asked.
“I’m still figuring that part of my life out. A degree in biology can steer you in so many different directions. Right now, I’m doing an internship at a clinical research lab.”
“Do you like it?”
“I love it. I wish the lab department would create a position for me.”
“Determination and hard work met with the right opportunity and timing will land you the job you want,” she suggested.
“The powers that be there know I’m striving toward that goal,” I said.
“Do you have any pictures of her?” she asked, quickly changing the subject.
It felt as though a knife had cut through the conversation. Based on her tone, I could tell she wanted to drill me with questions probably as soon as I handed her the tart. The few times I had talked to Maureen on the phone I never allowed her to ask me questions about our mother. I wanted to answer them in person, one time and one time only.
“No, I only left with the clothes on my back the night that I killed her.”
“Where did you live?”
“We lived in a tiny apartment in Norfolk. I don’t ever remember having furniture except a kitchen table. Anything valuable she would just sell for drugs. “
“What was her drug of choice?”
“Crack, and if she scraped up enough money, it was heroin.”
“Did she ever use drugs in front of you?”
“Yes, plenty of times. She was proud of it. Drugs were the only things that made her happy.”
“Did she ever show you any kind of affection or love?”
“No. When she was there she either ignored or yelled at me. There was no in-between. She left me alone, a lot. At times, I was left overnight, too,” I explained.
Maureen began to cry. “I just still can’t believe this,” she said.
“Maureen, I know it’s a lot for you. Deep down, you were looking for maybe some kind of angelic mother, but that simply wasn’t the case.”
“Have you been back to the apartment?” she asked.
“No,” I said, shaking my head.
“How was childhood after?”
“It was wonderful. My grandparents loved and nurtured me. I still think of my grandmother every day.”
“How is your grandfather doing?” she inquired. I had already shared with her that George had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.
“I haven’t talked to him much, these days.”
“Why? I thought you two were so close.”
“We are close. Lately, he has been so busy. The assisted-living home offers a lot of activities for the residents.”
“That’s a good thing,” she commented.
“Yes, it is.”
“May I make a suggestion? I will tread lightly.”
“Yes, you may,” I said.
“Go over there and surprise him with dinner.”
“I have done so, but he wasn’t home so I just left fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and turnip greens on the counter for him.”
“That was nice of you. I’m sure he appreciated it. What about our maternal grandparents? Where are they?” she asked, shifting the conversation again.
“I don’t know,” I said, shrugging my shoulders.
“Angela, are you all right? Your forehead is sweating.”
“I’m just a little hot. Do you mind getting me a glass of water?”
“No. I will be right back,” she said, leaving the room.
Just in case I couldn’t get through the conversation, I placed an Ativan pill in my pocket. I quickly popped it in my mouth.
“Here is your glass of water. Also, I cut two slices of the raspberry tart with a scoop of vanilla bean ice cream,” she explained, handing it to me.
“Thank you.”
For the next few hours, we finally talked about Maureen and her life. She wanted me to meet her adoptive parents. I agreed to it for her. It took a lot for me to go back in time to answer her questions honestly and wholeheartedly. I looked forward to the next trip.
Chapter 26
<
br /> Unleash
“What a day!” I said after walking into my apartment. Fera immediately ran up to me. She wanted to be picked up.
“Hey, you,” Heather said after turning around in the chair to face my direction.
“Thank you for keeping on her for me,” I said.
“No problem. I already fed and walked her. I have only been here for a few hours. I have been online searching for graduate schools,” she expressed.
“Did you see any schools that you may be interested in?”
“No, I haven’t yet. Wouldn’t it be grand to find a school that offered scholarships? My student loans, now, are already kicking me in the butt.”
“Heather, one thing I know about you is that you are definitely not a quitter. If there’s something you want you go after it. Keep searching; you will find something,” I assured her, giving her a pat on the shoulder.
“You’re right. Speaking of something I want, there’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about,” she said.
“I’m all ears,” I said, sitting down on the couch. She sat down next to me and began crying. I had never seen Heather cry at all, even when we were all hauled off to jail. “What’s wrong?”
“Angela, do you believe in love at first sight?”
“No, not really. Love grows over time. I do believe two people can have chemistry or a spark in their first encounter together.”
“I believe in love at first sight.”
“So tell me, who’s the guy?” I asked eagerly.
“You’re assuming it’s a guy. Angela, it’s you who I have always loved. Since the first time I saw you in class, I gave you my heart. I’m in love with you,” she explained, placing her hand on my thigh, and then reached over to kiss me.
I quickly turned my head and moved over to give me more space between us. “Heather, I can’t do this. I had no idea you felt this way.”
“I’ve been hiding it for years. Only Adrianna, one of the girls who used to work at Pearl, confronted me about it. That day, I couldn’t stop staring at you,” she whimpered.
“You are one of my best friends. I love you like a sister. I want to continue only a friendship with you, but is that something you can handle?”
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