“They want me to carry their embryos for them?” I can’t believe what I’m hearing.
“Yes. They can clone their cells, but they cannot have the embryos grow in the labs. They have tried it, but it fails every time. They need a host for them. Which is where you come in. Your nervous and immune systems, your chromosomes and things I don’t understand about your genetics, must be what they’ve been waiting for all this time.”
“That’s why they didn’t want to risk killing me.”
“Kill you? They don’t want to kill you. They have been trying to make you for many years. They are getting old. You are the only hope for their species.”
“They just want to use me for breeding?”
“Yes. And now that they know that it can be done, they will do it again and again. All they need is your number, so they know what specimen you are, then will replicate it. They will mutate every little girl the same way. Most of them will die. If we hadn’t erased your data, they would already know.”
I instinctively reach for the tattoo on the back of my neck. This is far worse than anything I could have imagined.
“Do you understand how important it is that you stay safe?” Wudak asks. “A lot of children will suffer if you’re caught, not just you.”
“And those creatures will cover your earth like a plague,” Gritu says, “It will be their planet and then they will eliminate human and Sliman alike.”
“If they never find you, they will eventually die out,” Wudak says. “They left their planet because they thought the atmosphere was what was weakening them, because they destroyed it somehow. But now every planet they have invaded rejects them after a few years. They can live long lives, at least three centuries, but they’re running out of time.”
“Where are you going to take me?”
“We have an underground base. You can stay there until you’re strong enough to fight them. We’ll train you, we’ll show you what you can do with the sensory receptor device. We’ll serve you and we’ll be loyal to you throughout this entire war. In exchange, we want our freedom and Omicron 5.”
It’s a fair request. Between Doc and me we could probably do it.
“We don’t get separated,” Damian says. “The Saviors stay together.”
“We understand. You can all join us,” Wudak says with his head lowered. “You will be safe and you can enjoy all that we have to offer.”
* * *
It is decided that we will go with the Sliman. When they return in two days, they will lead us to their underground base. We will have to travel through our very own woods to get there. It will not only be a journey into the future, it will also be a trip through our past.
Finn sits next to me on the riverside. Our feet are dipped in the cool water. It’s a small river, more like a creek actually, but there’s plenty of small fish in it and they tickle our toes.
“I don’t know how I’m going to tell Shy Boy that we’re going,” I say.
“He will be fine,” Finn says. “He’ll spend more time with his own kind, that’s good for him.”
“Pip will miss him.”
“We’re doing this for him as well. For every living thing that ever had to suffer at the hands of the aliens.”
I kick my feet in the water. The water splashes on our legs and laps.
“Do you see me differently now?” I ask without looking at him.
“Differently how?”
“Now that you know I’m part alien.”
“You silly girl,” he says and hugs me. “We all are.”
I look at his dark hair, his bluish green eyes and the love I feel for him almost takes my breath away. I could kiss him, I could let him know that I am his now and forever, but it’s probably too late for things like that, or maybe too soon. The truth is I don’t know what Finn wants. I could ask him but I am afraid to lose the thing we have already.
Yet, it feels like it would be the right thing if Finn and I ended up together. Everybody seems to think so according to Tilly. We know each other so well, we share so much love and trust, and there have been a few, fleeting moments when I felt him moving closer to me. I felt as though these same questions were about to form on his lips, but we are either interrupted or one of us chickens out.
Maybe it would be better to wait until the situation with the Sliman is sorted out. I don’t know if that matters. Is there ever going to be an absolutely appropriate time for such a risky conversation?
Besides, according to the movies I’ve seen in Lost Town, there’s no need for conversation. A moment will arise that overwhelms us and our lonely hearts will melt into a kiss. Or something like that. So far, no signs show that Finn is looking for that moment with me. Damian surely does. His signs have all the subtlety of a sledgehammer.
I take my feet out of the water and escape his embrace.
“What’s up?” Finn says.
“Nothing, I forgot I told Pip I would be back by now,” I say as I put my boots on.
“Okay. I’ll come with you.”
“No. I want to walk back alone. I need time to think. I haven’t come to terms with my alien genetics.” That’s not the truth and I hate lying to Finn. Truth is I want to walk Damian out of my mind if I have to walk for three straight days.
Finn lies down on the riverbank and closes his eyes. I wonder what thoughts occupy his mind. Or maybe he’s not thinking at all. Maybe he’s connecting with the roots of his being as he has told me before. He is so peaceful and in touch with himself, I feel envious.
I kneel down next to his right ear. “Finn, you’re the man every girl dreams about in the old stories,” I whisper out of the blue before I walk away.
7
Tilly hands out cookies from a straw basket. There are vanilla, sugar and raspberry varieties. She is turning out to be quite the baker since she became Biscuit’s apprentice.
It’s late afternoon and the breeze gently rustles the branches over our heads. We are gathered to honor the siblings that we will never see again. It was Pip’s idea and all the girls agreed to participate wholeheartedly. We’ve spent the last hour talking about the ones we’ve lost. We’ve mentioned details of our everyday lives at the breeding villages and shared certain memories for the first time.
Scout is the only one who grew up without siblings but she had friends at the village that she misses. Tilly had two younger brothers. Nya had an older brother and a younger sister. Zoe had three sisters, all of them older than her. Zoe has no hope of ever finding any of them, unless maybe in a breeding village and in that case they would barely remember her.
We sit in the shade of the fir trees and we eat our cookies slowly to savor the flavors and textures. Nya has to keep her injured leg stretched out to let it heal. She makes loud noises as she chews to show her satisfaction. It is an act but it’s fun to hear her try so hard. Scout raises her hand.
“Go on,” Zoe says. She has been appointed the moderator of the conversation so we don’t all talk at the same time.
“Is it okay to gossip?” Scout says.
“What do you mean? Who can we gossip about? We’re all here,” Zoe says.
“I don’t know, the guys maybe. Or the Sliman,” Scout says.
“I don’t want to talk about the Sliman, yikes,” Tilly says.
“We could gossip about ourselves,” Pip offers.
“Gossip isn’t gossip if the gossiped about person is present when the gossiping is taking place,” Nya says.
“What?” Pip says staring at Nya.
“Ok, that’s enough,” Zoe says. “Scout, since it was your idea, you go first. I don’t care what it’s about, just start.”
I can’t help but notice that Scout is a bit too excited about this. She puts her entire body behind her words as she spits them out. “Biscuit has been visiting our tent a lot to talk to Tilly. Sometimes they disappear together.”
“Hey!” Tilly protests, “that’s not gossiping, that’s telling!”
“Is that it?” I sa
y.
“Well, the way you say it, it’s like you expected something earth-shattering,” Scout scolds me.
“The way I see it, everybody knows about that already.”
“What does everyone know, Freya?” Tilly asks.
“That you and Biscuit are love birds,” Nya jumps in.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Tilly commands.
“Tilly,” I say, “you can relax, we’re glad you have something cooking with Biscuit.”
The girls all laugh and Tilly smiles as she blushes. “Very funny, Tick,” she says to me. “At least I’m not the one with a cute nickname.”
Now it’s my turn to blush. All the other girls are enjoying this gathering more than Tilly and I.
“Neither of you have to be so secretive about it,” Scout says. “I just thought you can save a lot of energy if you put it out in the open.”
“It’s okay to have secrets,” Pip says. “Especially in a family.”
“I don’t have any secrets,” I tell them, “You all know that I am an alien bride. What else is there to hide?”
I meant this as a joke, but judging from the girls’ faces… Not a joke.
“And really,” I try again to lighten the mood, “we should not tease Tilly. She likes to be the one doing the teasing.”
The other girls smile again, but Pip seems concerned about my first statement. I have to remember she is very new to the free world. She takes everything literally. She hasn’t been exposed to books or movies. She hasn’t been a part of the endless conversations we’ve had around our fires. I can’t throw complex situations and emotions around she doesn’t understand.
“It’s true, I like to tease. But always in good spirit,” Tilly says
“You are probably one of the nicest people in the history of the world, Tilly,” Zoe says. “You make everyone smile.”
Tilly makes a decision. “I like Biscuit and I trust you with this information. Don’t make me regret it,” she says.
“Finally,” Scout says. “That’s what I was hoping for. You don’t have to play hide-and-seek with us.”
I think that’s the end of that conversation but I’m wrong. It doesn’t come from Pip like I feared. It comes from Tilly. “Maybe you would like to trust us with the same kind of information, Freya,” she says.
I shake my head in panic.
“Yes, it’s about time,” Scout chips in. “Tell us.”
“There’s nothing to tell,” I say. “We’ve talked about this, Tilly.”
“I didn’t believe you then and I don’t believe you now,” she says.
“Do we have to spell it out for you?” Zoe teases me.
“Zoe, come on, you too?” I scold her.
“Why not me? I can tease same as everyone else.”
“So I see. Are you done yet?” I don’t know the way out of this. I’ve seen them ambush aliens and now they are ambushing me.
“Hmm, let’s see. No, not quite,” she says. “Oh Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo?”
Nya bends her face at that. “I think they are less Romeo and Juliet and more Heathcliff and Cathy.”
I am not enjoying this.
“Anthony and Cleopatra,” Tilly suggests.
Pip is confused, but adds, “Finn and Freya.”
The aliens will not have a chance with these girls after them.
“What do they mean exactly, Freya?” she says. “Didn’t they know Finn is your best friend?”
“Of course, they know. They are just playing a game.”
I know how to answer Pip, but not the other girls. I will sound stupid defending myself. Or should I even try? They could be right after all.
“Didn’t all those people die miserable deaths?” I ask. It’s the best I can do.
“I like Theo,” Nya confesses.
Thank you, Nya, I think. The newness of what she has said turns the attention away from me in an instant.
“You like Theo?” Zoe asks suspicious of Nya’s declaration.
“I don’t even know why. He’s kind of cute, I guess,” Nya says and starts nibbling on a cookie.
“Now wait a moment, you can’t just throw a thing like that and then act like it’s the most normal thing in the world,” Zoe says.
“Do you like him, too?” Nya says.
“That’s not it. Well, of course I like him, I care for him, but not like that. I just don’t want you to make a fool out of him.”
“Good. He’s too young for you,” Nya says through bouts of loud chewing.
Zoe is about to say something when we hear a rustling sound in the nearby trees. The sound stops almost immediately but when it starts again, it has moved closer.
“What is that?” Tilly wonders.
“Shy Boy,” Pip says and it’s the first time I hear her say his name.
“Your chimp?” Zoe asks me.
“He’s not ours but yes,” I say. Then I turn to Pip. “We have to say goodbye.”
Pip nods and a sweet sorrow overtakes the smile on her face.
We excuse ourselves to find Shy Boy. He sits at the root of his favorite tree, the tree where we first met him. We give him our cookies and he chuckles at the sight of them. He eats fast and when he’s done, he offers us a handful of berries.
“Yum, Shy Boy, where did you get those? Those are good,” I say.
“They are delicious,” Pip says.
Shy Boy is startled. He has never heard Pip talk before. Not in full sentences. Not intentionally. He walks around her sniffing the air, trying to figure out what is different about her. Then he bares his upper teeth and makes some shrilling sounds.
“Stop going around, you’re making me dizzy,” Pip says laughing. Shy Boy sits on the ground with a heavy thud and Pip climbs on his lap.
“We have to tell you something, Shy Boy,” I start.
He turns his face to me and my heart breaks. I don’t know how I’m going to tell him that we’re probably never going to see him again.
“We have to go,” Pip says.
“Yes, and we will not be back for a very long time. Maybe never,” I say.
Shy Boy stays silent. Then he starts picking at Pip’s hair.
“No, Shy Boy. You can’t make this go away. Pip and I have to go. We will be in danger if we stay. You will be safe with your friends.” I speak slowly looking into his eyes. Shy Boy can understand a good three hundred words by my calculations. I know he understands “go” and “danger”. I know he can follow short sentences. His face grows sad and he starts whimpering.
“It will be fine,” I say. “You will have fun here. We will try to come back. We will miss you.”
I run my fingers through the black fur on his back. I scratch his head and I kiss his face. I will miss him but maybe it’s better for him not to be near us. We are wanted and we will be hunted, but he is free to roam the forest.
Shy Boy hides his face in his hands when Zoe, Tilly, Nya and Scout show up. They’ve been curious about Shy Boy for some time now and it’s their last chance to interact with him.
Shy Boy trusts Pip and me completely and he has warmed up to Finn but he is reluctant to open up with a whole bunch of us.
“Silly thing,” Zoe says. “Closing your eyes won’t make us go away.”
Shy Boy peeks at her through an opening between his fingers.
“It’s okay,” Pip reassures him. “Those are our friends. They want to say goodbye, too.”
“Can I touch him?” Tilly asks and I hold Shy Boy’s hand out for her to make the initial contact.
He doesn’t pull away which surprises me at first but when I let go of his hand, he immediately panics. When I hold him, he feels more at ease with humans. Maybe we would both have been better off if we hadn’t met at all. My eyes well up and I realize it’s time to let go.
I pat his head while the girls hug him and say goodbye.
Then it’s Pip’s turn. “Goodbye, Shy Boy,” she says. “I will never forget you. I will come back for you with Freya
and Finn and we will be a family again.”
“Goodbye, Shy Boy,” I whisper. “You will always be in my heart.”
* * *
We walk back to the camp with our heads hung and our hearts sunk. We can feel the finality of what lays ahead for us. Pip and I have bonded with Shy Boy, but all of us have sensed his disappointment and sadness. We are leaving a whole bright world behind us to move down into a dark dungeon.
Finn and Theo walk toward us. Tilly reaches over and pinches Nya’s arm. Nya screeches and drops her crutch. Zoe gets it for her and shushes Tilly.
“Are you guys doing okay?” Finn asks as he hurries to help Nya.
“Sure, we’re fine. Where are you going?” Zoe says.
“Looking for you,” Theo says. “We thought you might like to go to the training ring before we pack everything up.”
“Okay, yes, we’re in,” Zoe says. Our final day of training here in the mountain camp. It’s anyone’s guess when it will be safe for us to come and live out in the open again. If it will ever be safe once the drones are here. My responsibility suddenly feels a thousand times heavier.
“We said goodbye to Shy Boy,” I say to Finn. I want to dive into his arms and cry, but we are not alone.
“You have him in your heart and he has you in his,” Finn says. “You can carry each other wherever you go.”
“I wish I had your faith in things.”
“All you have to do is decide to have it,” he explains.
“Is life really so easy for you?” I say. Sometimes he eludes me.
“What are you two talking about?” Tilly asks.
“Shy Boy,” I reply but then I see that her question was a pretext. Her eyes point towards Nya and Theo who are walking next to each other. Theo’s arm wraps around her waist to support her. Nya doesn’t waste her time once she has made up her mind.
“What are we looking at?” Finn asks following my gaze.
“Nothing that would interest you,” I say with mixed feelings. Is he blind to the concept of love or is he just blind to seeing me as a woman?
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