by John Popper
I don’t recall any strategy because when you truly decide you want someone, your self is revealed and strategy becomes far too stagnant for something that rings throughout your core so truthfully. I said yes in my heart and began to talk to her, and before the night was over I would steal a kiss—a respectful kiss but a real passionate kiss because I wanted one from her, and that was simply that. I also made sure to get her contact info, and with each step of the process I would say yes.
We were both involved with other people and did our best to respect those relationships, but we were instantly drawn to each other, and as I said yes, as I came to know your mother, I came to see what an amazing and passionate mind and heart had befallen me. She was so much younger than me, and her innocence in some of life’s adventures seemed to need me. But the innocence in me could immediately realize and value the wisdom she’d garnered at so tender an age.
She knew of hearts and of love’s purpose as it spoke to me . . . and we were off and running. I truly feel that it was she who began to make my life matter to me again, even before that night in Atlanta when I was gigging with a local band and she, having seen us the night before in Alabama, really wanted to go see Willie Nelson play at the “enormo-dome” there. We knew Mickey (Willie’s harp player), and he got her into the show. When she met back up at my gig afterward, she waited for me to finish, and we went back to our room and conceived you.
So an automatic take-away here is that should you ever get the opportunity to see the Red Headed Stranger, please bring contraception (because apparently it only takes one out of every couple). Actually, take several forms of contraception because your mom was on the pill and Shotgun Willie don’t mess around!
So there we were, less than a year into our relationship and pregnant with you! Bear in mind, we had just decided to get a dog (Trigger), and you were a total surprise. Yes, we both freaked, but we very quickly knew we wanted you so bad, like the sun wants light! We were already becoming a family, and off we went. We said yes to you, and every yes we’ve said has saved us in this, our newest chapter of this life we are living.
So it certainly seems time to pen a book of my life before I met you or your mom, partly because I’m finally starting to get to an age when my memory is starting to fade and I want to recount as accurately as possible these events I befell, now that I no longer live them with the same daily determination. I am now dedicated to a very new priority, one I hope I can deserve. I also craft this little tome to help understand how I got here as well as perhaps gain any catharsis in the retrospect at their recounting.
A great deal of this book was taken from my journal entries that I kept dutifully from around 1990 to 1999. Then I would recall the tale through my current eyes to allow the forty-eight-year-old man to reconcile with the determined young lad in his twenties. I hope I was sincere in that attempt and not just burying bodies (metaphorically as far as you know).
Which reminds me: all recounts in this book are not to be taken as factual or legally binding. They are merely my interpretations and embellishments for entertainment value. I try to be fair, but my brain always makes shit up to tell a tale and sell a nifty book. Perhaps I just don’t want you to judge me—and perhaps you will and I should be judged—but my intention is for you to have gotten to know me well enough to make up your own informed mind (the rest of the readership will have to risk this uninformed, but they are paying me, so . . .). I hope you can know what it felt like. I must say the hardest part of writing this book was finishing it.
I often found myself telling the same story or mentioning it to Dean, my co-author, as we’d go through his edits only to have the story in question appear in the next line. I think I just wanted to keep reliving it, as the first telling brought so much back. Dean was great at keeping track of my tangential ramblings to give them form, and he even kept my subject-changing and time-jumping through my various yarns as accurate as we could (without disintegrating into pure non sequitur, of course). We felt that there was value in that tactic of yarn-spinning.
Retrospect does really tend to offer insight, and Dean had a great gift throughout this whole project for letting me shine where I shone best, and this wouldn’t be possible without him. I hope the reader can keep track. The only section of the book I did not go over with Dean Budnick and the process we came to rely on is this very dedication . . .
And it is at this point that I put down this rather longwinded dedication I’ve been working on for the past two days and drive your mother to the hospital to give birth to you. So to be continued and see you soon!
November 23, 2015, 11:15ish pm PST
Oh my god, we just had you!
Call your mother! Call your mother! Call your mother!
Eleven hours and no drugs the whole time, she was such a champ. I cut your little cord after I got you both to the hospital (an hour away) in only thirty-five minutes. That Mercedes still moves!
You are so beautiful! Pulling you from your mother’s nether regions has to be one of the most significant moments of my life! Well done, kiddo!
Anyway, I will wrap this up, my darling daughter, by telling you three true things that every father would want his daughter to know:
First, I am an undefeated thumb wrestler—righty, lefty, doubles . . . it doesn’t matter. Well, I have lost on a rare occasion or two, but in the no-holds-barred underworld atmosphere of freestyle full-on thumb wrestling, you can’t count on fair rulings or equal footing—or, rather, thumbing—every time. But suffice it to say, I would roam the Earth searching for a warrior to best me and never could. Concert promoters would bet money on me, though I was in it for the love and grace of the sport. One night I beat both Goldberg and Hulk Hogan (though, to be fair, Goldberg had just “real” wrestled five guys and was rather tired, and Hulk just kinda didn’t wanna be standing there anymore and gave me the win). The moral? If you choose a ridiculous enough thing to be great at, you can rule at it (see harmonicas).
Second, I have pulled many four-leaf clovers—and even a five-leafer when needed. I guess I only tell you that because I want you to know they are out there. So look for them whenever possible if it isn’t too much of a stretch.
Finally, I hear music in my head all the time. Like a punch-drunk fighter, I can’t tell if I have played too many gigs and it’s stuck in my head or if it’s the reason I’ve played so many, but if you notice your dear old dad seeming distracted or as though listening to something else, I can only tell you that life all around us has music in it, and once you learn to speak or hear it, it cannot be ignored. I only hope that has been a good thing as I have decided to see it—or, rather, hear it—and I thank you for any patience you might require. I also thank you for showing me that love is a breathing two-way communicative conduit that started instantly when I saw that confused face first emerge, and the instant we started that conversation, love became the most important thing.
We are embarking on a grand adventure, you and I. This book is what I was doing while waiting for you. Enjoy it!
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
John Popper thanks: My family, parents, siblings, cousins, uncles, nieces and nephews (especially Petra and Jeff), Trigger, Blues Traveler (Brendan, Chan, Tad, Ben, and Bobby), Duskray Troubadours, Brothers Keeper, John Popper Project featuring DJ Logic band, the Zygote band, Wasabi, the Dogs, and Dean Budnick.
Management: Lani Sarem, Seth Yudof and everyone at UD Factory, Charles Attal, Mat Whittington, Dave Geller, Meghan Allen, Scott McGhee, Doc McGhee, Susan Banks, Dave Frey, Debi Burdick, Pete Malkin, Adam Schneider, Dave Graham, Bill Graham, Tom Gruber, Dave Precheur, Scott Patterson, Lance Matthews, and Chris Davies.
Agents: Jeffrey Hasson, Keith Sarkisian, and Chip Hooper.
Elliot Groffman and Janine Small, Scott Padell, Sharon Kimball, and everyone at Padell Business management,
Stu Fine, Al Cafaro, Al Marks, Patrick Clifford, Tim Lipsky, Pablo Pascal, and every record label I’ve ever belonged to and the people who have worked with me at t
hose labels.
Producers: Mark Needham, Sam Hollander, Craig Street, Jono Manson, Dave Bianco, Jay Bennett, Don Gehman, Terry Manning, Trina Shoemaker, Matt Wallace, Mike Barbiero, Steve Thompson, James Leroy Wilson, Rich Vink, Dave Swanson, Jim Gaines, and Justin Niebank
Teachers: Arne Lawrence, Chico Hamilton, Bernard Purdie, Anthony Biancosino, Marylou Huchet, Joan Katz, Linda Smith. Larry Manceer, Jeff Hooker, Mr. Sutherland, Mr. Deeks, Mrs. Lesson, Mrs. Miles, Dr. Kimberly, Father Coleman, and all other teachers who have helped me despite myself.
Oscar Arrandondo, Raul Flores, Marty Sheridan, Daryl David Pearsall, Jodie Platz, and any other security I’ve had the honor to work with over the years.
All bands I’ve had the pleasure of serving with on the various H.O.R.D.E. tours and the other package tours we’ve done.
Larry Bloch, Pete Shapiro, Adolph Dutell, Tom Hosier, Jason Rosen, and Daniel Kellison.
David Letterman, Howard Stern, Conan O’Brien, Jimmy Fallon, Jimmy Kimmel, Adam Carolla, Jay Leno, Dennis Miller, Jon Stewart, and every cast and crew of Saturday Night Live.
Greg Perloff, Nick Clainos, the Barsotti Brothers, Nigel and Kaaran James, every single member of every crew I’ve ever worked with from day one (even the shitty ones)—there are too many of you to name, and you and I both know what I’ve put you through, I couldn’t ask for more.
Everyone in the Air Force Reserve, USO, and all branches of military who I had the honor of serving with in my various adventures overseas.
Literary agent Zach Schisgal, Ben Schafer, and everyone at Da Capo.
All friends, exes, and impactful characters—if you mattered to me, you mattered in this book and I want to thank you. And if the editors yanked you out of this book, you may still matter to me, so feel free to confer if you have questions.
And last but not least, all fans and audience members. I’m blown away by your interest, and you have all my love and faith.
Dean Budnick thanks: First and foremost, Mr. John Popper. During our final session John explained that he was getting tired of hearing himself share anecdotes. I never did. Those calls from the road and at home were quality entertainment no matter how ragged the voice on the other end of the line might have sounded.
Jordan Popper, for her steady presence and welcome perspective, and Eloise Popper, the ruler of the roost.
While charting the story of John and Jordan’s romance and marriage, I celebrated my own twentieth wedding anniversary, so I salute Leanne Barrett for her good taste and good humor.
My children maintained interest and tolerance throughout the process. I am ever amazed by Caroline, who squirms a bit at the title, and Quinn (be sure to download Penguin Zoom and the latest games from Eleet Studios).
My parents have always been supportive, as they were once again, even providing some cover guidance over Thanksgiving dinner.
Speaking of that cover, it was a scramble to land the perfect image, so I extend my gratitude to Amanda Peacock for delivering the photo John envisioned. Deepest appreciation to the effort put in by many photographers and interested parties, including Eric Brodsky, AJ Genovesi, Andrew Schuman, Stewart O’Shields, Patrick Stevens, Danny Clinch, Jay Blakesberg, Stuart Levine, Michael Weintrob, Dino Perrucci, John Patrick Gatta, Vernon Webb, Marc Millman, Andrew Blackstein, Erik Kabik, and Dave Precheur.
Thanks as well to everyone at Relix, from publisher and friend Peter Shapiro on through Mike Greenhaus, Rachel Seiden Baron, Rob Slater, Matt Inman, Sam D’Arcangelo, Brian Stollery, Brad Tucker, Chris Mocharla, Kristen DeTroia, Amy Jacques, Lilli Friedman, Olivia Millman, Colby Casoria, Angela Ribbler, Jonny Pepperman, Nikki Wiesenberg, Steve Grybowski, Wayan Zoey, Andy Turnbull, Deb Schuler, and the crew.
I am thrilled that Zach Schisgal served as our agent on this book and that he sold it to Ben Schafer at Da Capo, where I had once hoped Ticket Masters would land. Lori Hobkirk, Josephine Moore, Lissa Warren, and Fred Francis have aided and abetted.
The process of looking back to the late 1980s, when I first saw John and Blues Traveler, sparked me to revisit that era of the Grateful Dead and led to my novel Might as Well (due out right around now). Thanks to Paul Lucas for connecting me with Tyson Cornell and Rare Bird Lit during the process of completing this book.
All of which brings me back around to John Popper, the man so nice I thanked him twice. Hail fellow well met (and in overalls, no less).
INDEX
A&M Records, 86–92, 154–158, 211–212, 222
Abilene’s, 43–44, 49
abortion, 279–280
addictions, 141–142, 144, 203, 217
Adolph, 67–68
ads, music in, 161
Afghanistan, 283, 284
Ain’t Mozart, 43
“Ain’t That Life” (Popper), 35
Allen, Johnny, 43, 44
“All in the Groove” (Blues Traveler), 91–92
“All I Wanna Do” (Crow), 131
Allman, Gregg, 89–91, 101, 102
Allman Brothers Band, 100–102, 131
Alpert, Herb, 92
alpine slides, 112
Amber, 238
Amsterdam, 240–241
Anastasio, Trey, 93, 94–97, 124, 128
“And So It Goes” (Popper), 36
angioplasty, 202, 212
apocalypse, 251
appearance, 141–43, 287
appetites, 205, 216–217
Apple, Fiona, 228–229
Aquarium Rescue Unit, 123, 125, 127
arrests, 248–249
Attal, Charles, 260, 262, 265
audience. See also fans
captivating, 6–7, 52
reading, 53–54
Austin, Texas, 219
authority, 13
Authority, The, 47
autobiographical songwriting, 168–169
Aykroyd, Dan, 18, 149, 194–195
Azaria, Hank, 50–51
B-52s, 82
back slappers, 170
bagpipes, 108–110
balloon, 136–137
Bank, Susan, 292–293
barbecue, 215
Barbiero, Michael, 155, 156–157
Barenaked Ladies, 139, 161
Barr, Roseanne, 191, 194, 231, 279
Barron, Chris, 24–25, 30–31, 45, 57, 125, 242–243, 263
¡Bastardos! (Blues Traveler), 222, 256–257
Beauford, Carter, 200
Beavers, Aaron, 263
bebop, 41, 52–53
Beck, Glenn, 273
bedpan, 114–115
beer ads, 133, 161
Beggerman Thief, 19
Bela Fleck and the Flecktones, 124, 127
Bell, John, 124
Bengal tiger, 222–223
Bennett, Jay, 257
Betts, Dickey, 100–101, 131, 245, 246
Bianco, Dave, 258
Biancosino, Anthony, 12–14, 28, 37
Birch, Thora, 173
Black Cat Jam, 34, 37
black cat New Year’s Eve ritual, 164–166, 198
Black Crowes, 133, 229–230
Blaine, David, 228
Blair Witch Project, 138
Bleecker, Marcus, 259
Bloch, Larry, 68
Blow Up the Moon (Blues Traveler), 264, 266
Blue, Sugar, 2, 20, 23, 197
Blues Band, 29–34, 36–38
Blues Brothers, 7, 18, 149–150, 195
Blues Brothers 2000, 194, 195
Blues Traveler
adds new members, 218–219
beginnings of, 28–34, 36–38
early years of, 42–43, 44
evolution of, 73–74
gigs in New York, 65–69, 71, 72
identities of, 305–306
management of, 75–85
moves to New York, 48–54
New York apartments of, 54–58
operational changes in, 220–221
pools funds, 58–59
Blues Traveler (Blues Traveler), 87–88, 160
Bonfiglio, Robert, 21
Bon Jovi, Jon, 294
Bosnia, 283, 285
Bridge (Blues Traveler), 219, 222, 255–256
Broken Lizard, 181
Brooklyn Bowl, 303–304
Brothers Keeper, 300–301
Brown, James, 130
Brown, Tom, 7, 149
Brown, Zac, 309
Bulls, 171–172, 188–189
Burbridge, Oteil, 201, 218
Burger King, 128, 144
Buscaglia, Billy, 45
Buscaglia, Robert, 45
Bush, George W., 180, 294
“But Anyway” (Blues Traveler), 91, 153, 196
Butterfield, Paul, 18, 34
BuzzFeed, 278–279
C3, 257, 260, 262–263, 265
cabaret licenses, 51–52
Cafaro, Al, 157, 158, 276
Caitlin, 239
California, 253
Canada, Popper smuggles handgun into, 246–247
cannon, 250–251
cap pistol, 248–249
car accidents, 118–119
“Cara Let the Moon” (Blues Traveler), 263–264
Carolina, 235
“Carolina Blues” (Blues Traveler), 222, 235
Carolla, Adam, 176
Carvey, Dana, 151
CBGB’s, 66
Celebrity Deathmatch, 227–228
cello, 7
cerebral palsy, Popper sings to children with, 138
Challenger disaster, 35
chaperone, on USO Tour, 285–286
cheerleaders, 238, 284, 287–288
Chicago Bulls, 171–172, 188–189
children, 299
“Christmas” (Popper and Anastasio), 97–99
chromatic harmonicas, 182
cigarettes, 214–215
Claire, 235
Clapton, Eric, 291
Clifford, Patrick, 221
Clifford Ball, 124
Clinton, Bill, 289, 291, 292, 293–294
Clinton, Chelsea, 138
Clinton, Hillary, 291, 294–295
clothing, 142–144
cocaine, 75, 205
cockroaches, 56–57
comedy, 7
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