by Pat Simmons
She and Jeff made it across the Poplar Street Bridge into the Metro East in no time. As Shae conducted her interviews, Rahn’s “no comment” remark continued to revolve in her mind. Had he erased her completely from his memory?
The thought sparked mixed emotions. What did the man expect her to do? KMMD paid the bills and added to her social security benefits. That was my career that could’ve been damaged! she wanted to shout. He used to cherish her with his love, but now he merely added to her anxiety.
The next morning, on her day off, instead of jogging on the trail in Forest Park, Shae opted to use the gym equipment in the condo exercise room on the sixth floor. She had just returned from her workout when her phone rang.
“How do you feel about what Rahn said yesterday?” Shari asked.
Her sister’s directness never offended Shae. “I admire him. He put everything on the line to tell the truth, shaming the other wrongdoers with his confession.” She had hoped a good workout would clear her head of what Rahn had said, but Shari’s question only caused the previous day’s events to resurface.
“Or to get you back…” Shari sounded as if she was in the courtroom, prompting her on a witness stand.
I wish. Rahn had done exactly what she had suggested as far as nipping the problem in the bud before it could grow; but clearly, it had been God’s timing, not hers. “I want to reach out to him, but to say what? ‘I love you’? That sounds like a mockery, but it’s the only thing I want to say.”
Shae wandered through her condo until she finally rested on the familiar window seat in her living room overlooking Union Boulevard. She admired the foliage of the trees against the backdrop of pricey homes.
How many times had she waved good-night to Rahn from that very spot? She frowned, then blinked. Was wishful thinking causing her eyes to play tricks? What were the odds of someone besides Rahn who drove a black Audi coming to visit someone at her address? Craning her neck, she squinted to see if the driver was still inside the car.
Shari’s chatter faded as Shae’s heart pounded, wondering if Mr. Chapman would buzz her to alert her that she had a guest in the lobby. Several seconds passed, but nothing happened. She peeked out the window again. The car hadn’t moved.
She had to get downstairs. “God will work things out. I’ll call you later. Bye.” Racing into her bathroom like a madwoman, she freshened up as best she could, though she would have preferred a shower. Then she snatched the first piece of sweat-free clothing she could find from where she’d thrown it over a chair.
Getting to the lobby ASAP was her mission. She couldn’t chance a shower, coordinating an outfit, applying makeup, or making sure every strand of hair was in place. She didn’t care how she looked. Well, almost. All she wanted was Rahn’s strong arms around her; his smooth voice telling her that they could work it out.
Hopping on one foot and then the other, Shae slipped on her flats. The phone rang again. She reached for it, hoping it was Rahn. She didn’t hide her disappointment when she heard Brecee’s voice on the other line.
“You know, I was just thinking about Rahn’s ‘no comment’ from yesterday—”
“Yeah, me, too. Hold that thought. I’ll call you back.” Again Shae rushed off. She finger-combed her curls as she raced to the elevator. On the ride downstairs, she tried to tame her nerves. When the door opened, she stepped off and scanned the lobby. There were only a few residents hanging out, and there was no sign of Rahn.
She nodded at Mr. Chapman as she hurried to the front entrance. There were two vacant parking spots. The black Audi was gone. Her heart dropped. Had Rahn changed his mind? In a slow twirl, Shae retraced her steps.
“Did I have any visitors?”
Mr. Chapman shook his head as if he knew what she suspected. “For a moment, I thought that was Mr. Maxwell’s car, too. I wanted to commend him for coming forward and saying what he did.” He shrugged. “Anyway, the driver took off without ever getting out.”
There was no use denying her purpose. Embarrassed and humiliated that she had acted like a desperate woman, she thanked him, then returned to her lonely abode.
Back in her condo, Shae berated herself for her behavior. She swiped up her cordless phone and called Brecee back. “Sorry about that.”
“So, where was the fire you had to hang up on me to cover?”
“No fire.” Shae sighed and flopped into her chaise in her bedroom. “I thought I saw Rahn’s car parked down below. It was wishful thinking on my part that we could pick up where we left off—end of story.”
Brecee balked. “Right. I sense there are still a few more chapters left before you close the book on Rahn,” she stated with a yawn. “Okay, well, I need to crash, but all things work together for our good…”
Shae finished Romans 8:28 with her, but how was another broken heart for her own good? For the remainder of that day and all of the next, she didn’t leave her condo. She cleaned, did laundry, and got caught up on her social media accounts. She dared to read what viewers had said about the way her relationship with Rahn had ended.
On Facebook, Mzz Lady commented: “A woman’s got to do what a woman’s got to do. Men have to understand that!” Mzz Lady had ten likes and one share.
BradleyLookinggoodpapa wrote: “A good man is hard to find, or so women say. I think Shae should have stuck by him through thick and thin, for better or worse.”
The man’s comment had generated some backlash on his wall. Some had criticized BradleyLookinggoodpapa for quoting sacred vows that didn’t apply to any relationship but marriage.
“Humph. My point exactly,” Shae mumbled with a nod.
With more than a hundred posts, her Facebook friends seemed just as torn as she as to whether she had done the right thing. On a good note, it didn’t seem as if she had lost any ground professionally because of her decision.
Most people seemed to believe she was still a great reporter and had done what she felt she had to. Rahn’s actions also seemed to have garnered a mostly positive response. He was receiving more radio and television air time than he had for the attempted carjacking incident. Good for him.
On Twitter, Shae was surprised that #baseballandreporter was still trending with so many retweets. Some were positive. @shaecarmennews7 said: “They should find their way back to love.” Another tweet read: “They should work it out. I like both…Rahn, you see how fine Shae is, & Shae, you see that body? Doesn’t anybody believe in love anymore?” Still another tweet was touching: “Shae and Rahn were my heroes…”
“But we’re two ordinary people who were trying to find our way,” Shae whispered. A tension headache was building, so she logged off. As she lay down for a nap to rest her mind, she whispered, “Lord, what’s Your tweet?”
35
The verdict was in. The Major League Baseball Commissioner didn’t like to be made a fool of, and he had said so himself in a statement released to the media: “While I and others in the baseball league are disappointed by Mr. Rahn Maxwell’s actions, we must also commend him for coming forth and telling the truth. Despite his good intentions, Rahn did break the rules, albeit a long time ago, and he must be subject to the same penalties as anyone else…”
Fred Klass informed Rahn of the verdict. “You’re being slapped with the fines and penalties that were in place in two thousand and two, when the incident occurred, instead of the harsher ones that Cisco got hit with. That means a ten-game suspension and a five-thousand-dollar fine.”
Since the Cardinals’ season had ended and they had been eliminated from the playoffs, Rahn would be suspended for the first four games of the following season. Rahn was grateful.
He retreated to Richmond for a few days to check up on his mother. While there, he had time to reflect on the highs and lows of the past year. He missed Shae like an addiction. Her smiles, her hats, all the things they had talked about, even her urging him to go public… In the end, he’d done just that. Had that been the only purpose behind Shae’s being in his life? He ref
used to believe that.
“There you go again—drifting.” His mother had been watching him like a hawk, as if she was looking for signs of a smallpox outbreak or the side effects of an overdose on baby aspirin or something.
“How can I be drifting when my eyes are open and I’m watching ESPN?” He had stopped by to visit and helped himself to the dinner she had prepared. Now, they were relaxing in her study. She had no objection watching sports programs, stating that it was in her blood after dating and marrying an athlete.
“No, you’re staring at the TV, but I can tell by your expression that your mind is elsewhere. It looks like you have some unfinished business.” Her eyes twinkled with mischief. She made it no secret that she loved Shae. The two women had spoken only a few times before and after his mother’s health scare.
“You were stupid once. Don’t repeat it. Go after Shae’s heart with everything you’ve got.”
Am I that much of an open book? he wondered. Unfinished business meant he needed a business plan, and that was the problem. He didn’t have a plan—yet.
“Might as well listen to me.” She shrugged. “I’m the mother, and Momma knows best.”
Rahn didn’t argue. She was right. He let Eloise Maxwell have the final word.
***
A month later, Shae welcomed her family back to St. Louis. The Carmens were the best distraction. Not only had three of her stories been nominated for recognition at the annual Salute to Excellence awards gala, but someone on the committee had heard her sing the national anthem at Busch Stadium and had asked her to perform one or two selections to kick off the party following the ceremony.
Initially, Shae had declined. Her heart just wasn’t in it. But then, for some reason, she’d had a change of heart and called back. “I would like to accept, if the offer still stands.”
“Absolutely. It would be such a treat.” The organizer had sounded delighted.
She had smiled. “I have one favor to ask. Would it be all right for my sisters to accompany me?”
Once the woman had agreed, Shae had called Brecee to tell her to bring her guitar, then phoned Shari and instructed her to bring her sax. Shari had revealed a surprise of her own: Garrett would be tagging along. Finally, Shae would get to meet Shari’s Prince Charming. The only person who would be missing was Rahn. “I plan to be right there beside you,” he had once said. His words flooded her mind more and more as the ceremony drew near.
When the night of the shindig had come, Shae sighed as she spied the gown flowing from the satin hanger in her walk-in closet. She loved the chiffon fabric; she liked how the two coordinating shades of deep blue and ocean blue created an unusual, eye-catching shade.
Again she thought about Rahn’s reaction when she’d modeled it for him—which she’d done more than once, per his request. His eyes had sparked before he’d stood and walked toward her, his look of passion holding her captive, as she’d mentally counted his steps. When she’d reemerged from the fitting room dressed in her everyday clothes, she’d discovered that Rahn had already paid for the stunning piece from the Jovani collection. “I want you to turn heads when I escort you that night,” he had said.
Shaking the recollections from her mind, Shae tried to regroup. She had to get ready. Her family was waiting on her.
Not so fast. Her mind refused to comply as one more memory slipped out. She could hear Rahn’s deep voice complimenting her: “Hmm-mm. When you walk, it flows. It’s beautiful on you.”
Enough! She battled for mental dominance. If she broke down and cried, she wasn’t sure if she would be able to stop.
Shari strutted into Shae’s closet. “I would definitely wear this.” Her sister fingered the intricate silver beading that crisscrossed below her bust in a continuous loop around her waist. “Even if you didn’t pay for it.”
Shae gnawed on her lip, still undecided. “It will only make me remember how much I love him,” she admitted softly.
“You love that man, whether you put that dress on or not,” Brecee stated from her perch on Shae’s bed. “No one else will know your benefactor.” She uncrossed her legs, stood, and joined her and Shari at the mirror.
Shae was almost persuaded, but she still held back, looking for other options.
Her mother, who had been standing silently on the sidelines, came into the walk-in and hugged Shae. “It’s beautiful, and that’s probably the same beauty he saw in you. Wear the dress, or we’ll be late for this premiere St. Louis black-tie banquet you’ve been telling us about for weeks.” Then she followed Shari to the living room to join Stacy and Ted and to greet Shari’s boyfriend, Garrett, who had just arrived. He was staying at a nearby hotel.
“You heard Mother. Let’s do this thing.” Brecee fussed as Shae slipped into her gown. “Don’t mess up your hair. Do you realize the artistic skill it took to get every spiral curl in place?”
“I know. I feel like I’m wearing a cap made out of bobby pins.” Shae patted the crown of her hair—all hers, no more weaves. She liked the look of her hair piled high on her head, even though it was likely she would pay for her fashion statement with a headache the next day.
Brecee zipped up the dress as Shae admired its beauty in the wall-length mirror. It hugged the curves Rahn had raved about when Shae had said she thought she could stand to lose five or ten pounds.
Soon Shae and her family entourage traveled the short distance to the Renaissance Hotel downtown, with the men carrying the cases holding Shari and Brecee’s instruments.
Everyone attended: the local celebrities, the self-proclaimed famers, and the politically influential. It was the one day out of the year when the media was honored for its work. It wasn’t about showcasing the bad but exposing the ills of society, so that, eventually, the good could triumph.
The ambiance wowed the Carmens as they entered the ballroom. The gigantic chandeliers cast a glow of elegance throughout the large hall. An usher welcomed the group, checked their tickets, and guided them to their assigned table.
Along the way, Shae was stopped by fans and colleagues. Everyone was genuinely cordial. Some whispered their support of Shae’s decision to take a stand. Right. She nodded, not wanting to think about the love she’d found and lost.
Garrett and Ted pulled out chairs for the Carmen sisters and their mother before they took their own. Shae relaxed, if only physically, and took in the sights around her. Watching the other guests sashay through the door was like attending a fashion show. She was glad that her family had convinced her to wear the dress Rahn had bought her, even though it made her think of him. God, will I ever stop missing him? Releasing that thought, Shae concentrated on the here and now, post-Rahn Maxwell.
Glancing around the table, Shae smirked when she noticed her brother-in-law rubbing her sister’s stomach.
Ted winked. “Caught me.”
Shae shrugged. “If she’s enjoying it, don’t stop on my account,” she teased. Everyone around the table chuckled.
Next, her gaze was drawn to Shari and Garrett, who were huddled together in their own private world. This was the first time Shae had witnessed their blossoming love. The man was pure Hershey’s dark chocolate wrapped up in a Godiva wrapper. A dimpled chin gave him a boyish look when he grinned. He was handsome, but not “hold your breath and don’t blink” handsome like Rahn.
At least two out of the four Carmen sisters had found happiness. What Shae had heard was true—Shari and Garrett really did complement each other. What Shae wouldn’t give to be a fly on the wall and watch Garrett woo her sister.
With his arm poised protectively on the back of Shari’s chair, Garrett squeezed her shoulder, then kissed her cheek. “She’s beautiful, isn’t she.” It wasn’t a question.
“That she is.” Pulling her attention away from the lovebirds, Shae looked around, waving at more colleagues who were seated nearby. KMMD-TV was well represented, with ten guests each at three tables. Their presence was reassuring, considering she was one of only three African-Am
erican reporters out of a staff of twenty-five employed at the station.
Too bad people didn’t see affirmative action as an equal-opportunity mechanism. Without question, she had to work extra hard to be noticed, but praise God that she’d found favor on her job.
Shae leaned over toward her mother. “There have to be hundreds of people in here.”
“A thousand easily, sweetie.” Her mother smiled and tugged on one of the spiral curls dangling against Shae’s forehead. “You look like a princess,” she added, beaming.
On the other side of Shae, Brecee nudged her and whispered, “How is it possible for all these gorgeous men to swagger in here by themselves? Once I finish my residency, I may need to start my practice in St. Louis.”
“That would be great. I’ll help you pack. I could use some company here, and Stacy and Shari already have each other in Philly.”
“Yep, they’re taken. It’s just you and me,” Brecee mumbled as a fine brother snagged her attention.
Out of nowhere, Rahn’s “no comment” remark resurfaced. Shae’s mind dug farther in its memory bank and pulled out his plan to celebrate her victory. He had an amazing amount of faith in her abilities as a broadcast journalist, considering his fear for her safety when she was filming on location.
“Of course you’re going to win, babe. You are the best. While the weather is still warm, we could take a ride in a hot air balloon during the annual ballroom race,” he’d said, his brown eyes holding her captive as he’d apparently conjured up a celebration she would never forget. “I want to treat you to a day at the spa and then a quiet dinner, just the two of us. I know of a restaurant that will shut down for the right price and cater to the needs of my lady and me. Would you like that?”
Closing her eyes, she sighed. When would she stop hurting? She quietly sniffed. This was her night, and she had her family. The Carmens were a united front.
