by Ravenna Tate
She nodded.
“We could show Brian’s MRI to ten neurosurgeons, and not one of them would give us the exact same opinion, other than it was the brain bleed that led to Brian’s death. Plus, exposure. It was cold that week.”
That sucked, but she had to live with it for now.
“What else do you need from my client?” asked Lenore, addressing Annie.
“Just her signature.” Annie pulled Rosanna’s phone, wallet, and keys from a bag and slid a piece of paper and a pen over. After Rosanna signed it, she asked Lenore about the other frat members on the video.
“They can’t prosecute them. Even Mike. The statute of limitations has passed. And I am sorry for that. I’d love nothing more than to nail them each to the wall.”
So would I.
“What about you?” She glanced up at Houston. “Will you lose your job?”
Ty cleared his throat. “No, he will not.”
“Where is the flash drive now?”
“Locked up in evidence,” said Annie. “It will stay with the file on this case.” She glanced toward Lenore. “Unless you plan to file an objection of some type?”
“Can’t think of any reason why we’d want it. As long as it stays locked up, and access to it is restricted, Rosanna’s rights and her privacy will be protected.”
“Well I’m not okay with it,” said Rosanna. “Can’t you just trash it?”
“I wish we could,” said Annie. “But it stays with the file. And, look at it this way. It proves your story is true.”
Why did everyone keep saying that, as if she’d make up a horrible tale like that? Even so, the idea of that recording hitting the Internet made her want to puke. It’s probably best she didn’t remember she had it, or it would have been gone by now.
Annie cut her gaze toward Ty for a quick second. “And, if this helps at all, I echo your attorney’s sentiments. I wish we could nail those bastards to the wall.”
“Thank you, Annie. That means a lot to me.”
“I’ll drive you home,” said Lenore.
Houston caught Rosanna eye. “I’ll be over later, babe.”
“Okay.” She wanted desperately to kiss him, but not under these circumstances.
On the way back to her apartment, Rosanna asked Lenore how long she and Emily had known each other.
“She’s my sister.”
“You’re kidding.” Emily was a hands-off supervisor. She was rarely in the office, but always available by cell or IM if something came up that Rosanna couldn’t go to anyone else with. But since she was also a very private person, Rosanna knew very little about her personal life.
“Not at all. We even went to the same law school, but she graduated four years ahead of me.”
“That’s awesome.”
“Oh, and don’t worry about paying for this. I’m doing it pro bono as a favor to Emily.”
“I’m glad you brought that up because I was wondering how I’d afford you, and was embarrassed to say anything.”
“Emily said you were very bright. One of the most intelligent people she’s ever met.”
She did? “Thank you.”
“She also wonders why you never went to law school. She said you know as much about the law as most of the attorneys there.”
“Houston has asked me the same thing several times.”
“So? Why haven’t you? The firm would pay for it.”
“I know.”
“What’s stopping you, Rosanna?”
“Until Monday, the missing pieces of my life were stopping me. I never felt whole. I lived in fear some terrible memory would return one day, and my life would fall apart.”
Lenore was silent for a few moments. “You know, I have to tell you that if I’d gone through something like that, I have no idea how I’d deal with it. Seems to me you’re not only intelligent, but incredibly brave.”
“Thank you for saying so. I only hope the guilt subsides one day.”
“Wish I could help you with that.”
“JoElle, Dr. Thompson, that is, will help me. She’s an amazing therapist.”
“If you become an attorney one day, you could work with victims like yourself. Imagine how much insight you could provide, having gone through this.”
“What a fantastic idea.” Rosanna smiled. The excitement coursing through her was the same she’d felt when she first decided to become a paralegal. Why couldn’t she do that? Like Lenore said, the firm would pay for it. And now that she knew how her supervisor felt about her potential, it seemed the perfect course.
The idea of turning what Mike and Brian had put her through into something positive appealed to her. And perhaps in doing so, the guilt she felt would be appeased in the process. She couldn’t wait to tell Houston about this conversation, and get his perspective.
Chapter Twenty-Three
That night, Houston lay in Rosanna’s bed, listening to her plans to go to law school, and one day work with victims like herself. He thought it was perfect for her. Now if only he could get the rest of his day off his mind.
After facing down what he’d covered up with respect to Rosanna, and then helping Annie fish a six-year-old girl’s body out of a local creek this afternoon, all Houston had wanted to do was hold Rosanna in his arms.
The six-year-old had been missing for four days. Houston remembered seeing the breaking news story on TV, and had read late last night online about yet another community search. This afternoon, a parent had called their precinct with grim news. Seems a group of local kids had gone walking after school on the railroad tracks that ran past the creek for several miles. They reported seeing what they swore was a body floating, and unfortunately, they’d been right.
“Hey, you okay?” She rose up onto her elbow and glanced down at him, her beautiful face filled with concern.
“Yeah. Just thinking about a case.”
When Houston sat up, she did the same, crossing her legs. God, she had beautiful legs. Long and lean, they glowed soft and golden in the dim light she’d left on. They hadn’t made love in days, but he understood why. She had things on her mind that weren’t going to disappear overnight, if ever.
“I’m only sorry I couldn’t be there with you the whole time you were in that cell.”
“I am, too, but it turned out all right.”
For you. He immediately felt horrible that such a thought could rise up directed toward her. His possible future suspension, or worse, wasn’t her doing. He was the one who had chosen not to go to Ty as soon as he suspected Rosanna was the girl Jessica, Hollee, and Gareth had described. Not only had he withheld that information for weeks, but once he became certain of it, he’d sat in on Rosanna’s therapy without the department’s knowledge or sanction.
If she hadn’t found that flash drive, they would have nothing to use. He was certain that high-priced attorney they’d sent would file a motion to have the records from the hypnosis session thrown out. And because Houston had not mirandized Rosanna, the attorney would have won the motion.
“Houston? What is it?”
“Sorry, babe. Been a long day for both of us.”
“I know.” She took his hands, and he drew strength from their warmth. Her smile was the most perfect thing he’d seen all day. “When will you know what happens to you?”
“A few days.”
“That must make it hard to work in the meantime.”
“Yeah, but there’s plenty to keep me busy.” He reached out to stroke her face with one finger. “There is one other thing I’m certain of at this moment.”
“And what might that be?”
“You.”
“Houston, I wasn’t sure we’d survive this.”
“Are you sure now?”
“Honestly? No.”
That shouldn’t have come as a surprise, but hearing her voice it out loud was as painful as if she’d punched him. “Tell me what I need to do. I can’t lose you.”
“I need time.”
“We have a
ll the time in the world, Rosanna.”
“It may take all the time in the world for me to come to terms with what happened that night.”
There was no worse feeling in the world than being unable to help the person you loved. He had pushed her into seeking out JoElle. If he’d never done that, she’d have lived without the memories ever resurfacing. Not quite true…
They had already begun trying to poke through after he told her about the case. Would they have stayed buried if she’d never heard those few details he gave her? No one could answer that question.
“We should get some sleep,” she said as she lay down and snuggled against his body. Houston missed making love with her, but it seemed liked the crassest thing in the world to ask now. He’d have to deal with it. Her mental health was more important than his rutting hormones.
****
The next two days were long and emotional for Rosanna. Not being at work, with nothing to focus on all day except her own thoughts and the crushing guilt, had left her drained. She vacillated between wanting to call Houston and tell him it was over, to begging him to take her away someplace where no one had ever heard of Brian Wayside.
Both days, she saw JoElle. Intellectually, Rosanna knew in time the therapy would help, but her life was still in limbo. She may have recalled nearly every detail of the year she had suppressed, but all doing so had done was produce a host of unresolved issues, including her relationship with Houston.
“Tell me why you believe your relationship with him may be over?”
“I don’t know.”
“Rosanna, that’s a copout.”
“Nice pun.”
The quip earned a rare chuckle from JoElle. “Unintentional, I assure you.”
It was an easy answer, but she hadn’t said it out loud yet because she already knew where the conversation would lead. But that’s why she was here, so she might as well get it out in the open and be done with it. “I no longer believe I deserve him.”
“Because you blame Brian’s death on the fact you didn’t call the police when he fell and wasn’t moving.”
“Yes.”
“Has Houston given you any indication he feels the same way?”
“No. Not even close.” She knew he had wanted to have sex the past few nights, but was too much a gentleman to ask. She had wanted to as well, but was purposely avoiding being intimate with him, thinking it would make this easier. It had not even come close to doing so.
“Have you told him you feel this way?”
“No. He’ll only tell me the same thing you’re saying. That Brian’s death was an accident. That I, too, was a victim, and was likely still in shock, which is why I walked away and drove home. And afterward spent a year suppressing my memories of that party and the next morning.”
“And yet you feel that because those memories are now back, you should deny your feelings for this man. They haven’t changed, correct?”
“Not a bit.”
“Why, then, do you assume his have toward you?”
“I know they haven’t.”
“Does he blame you for Brian’s death?”
“Of course not.”
“Does he blame you for his decision not to tell his Commander that he’d put two and two together?”
“He doesn’t blame me for anything having to do with the outcome of those decisions.”
“So why are you blaming yourself for both that, and for Brian’s death?”
Why, indeed? “It’s the only way I can make sense of it.”
“Rosanna, sometimes horrible things happen, and there isn’t always a person to blame. Brian made bad choices, long before that party. Mike made bad choices, and although you said it was because of Brian’s influence, consider that Mike was already old enough to understand the consequences of his actions. He treated you in the cruelest way possible. He showed no love, no respect, and no care toward you that night.”
“He was drunk.”
“Not drunk enough to call and text you for a long time afterward, begging your forgiveness. He knew what he’d done was wrong. There was no memory loss on his part.”
“That’s true.”
“I’m betting if you were able to speak with him now, you’d find out that he still recalls every painful detail of that night, and of the way he treated you. I’m betting he wishes he could take it back.”
“I guess I hadn’t thought about any of this from his point of view.”
“And as for Brian, no disrespect to the dead, but he was no saint, either. You weren’t the first young woman that young man forced himself on.”
“No, I don’t believe I was.” But I was the last…
“His death was tragic. I won’t try to convince you otherwise. But not even the police blame you for it.”
“How do I stop doing it? How do I turn that off in my mind?”
“Time and patience. Also, we can try hypnosis again. I can use the same technique we use when we help clients stop smoking or make healthier food choices.”
“How does it work that way?”
“We essentially train your brain to think of those memories in a different way. A post-hypnotic suggestion, telling your mind that although Brian’s death was a horrible incident, it was not your doing.”
“Isn’t that cheating?”
“No more so than using it to try to kick a highly addictive habit like smoking is cheating, or using it to make healthier choices in what we eat.”
“So if we do this, I won’t blame myself any longer for Brian’s death? I won’t believe I don’t deserve Houston?”
“We may need more than one session, but yes. I believe we can use a post-hypnotic suggestion to ease your mind of the guilt you feel over Brian’s death, and over whatever discipline Houston may receive at work.”
“May I have a few moments to think about it?”
“Of course.” JoElle rose. “I have a few phone calls to return. Are you okay with me leaving you here to think it through?”
“Yes. Thank you.” As soon as JoElle was gone, Rosanna texted Houston and told him what JoElle wanted to do. While she waited for his reply, she almost laughed at herself. The fact that the first thing she’d done was to seek his advice on this next step proved how much she still wanted to be with him, didn’t it?
Babe, you do whatever you and JoElle think will work. I love you.
A huge smile spread across her face as Rosanna read the text. These weren’t the words of a man who blamed her for any of this, including his own predicament. This man loved her, and would stand by her no matter the outcome of this. She’d be a fool not to take this chance, and she’d be a bigger fool to let Houston go. He was the man she’d been waiting for.
Not only had he unlocked the person hiding inside her mind, but he’d helped to free her from the past, and had given her a new direction for her future. She loved him with her entire heart and soul, and it was time she made sure he knew that.
Chapter Twenty-Four
“I recommended charges be filed against you.”
Facing Ty this way, and having to stand there and put on a neutral face, was the last thing Houston wanted to do. The man was insufferable when he knew he was in the right.
“But the Deputy Chief disagreed. He said you came forward when you had credible information, although he does agree with me that you had no business being in that hypnosis session with Rosanna.”
The relief coursing through Houston’s body wasn’t something he could hide. Not only for him, but for Rosanna. “I understand, sir.”
Ty’s gaze softened, but only a tiny bit. “I’m sure you’re relieved they decided not to prosecute her.”
“Very.” That was an understatement.
“There’s no point in doing so. A jury would never convict her after seeing the video on the flash drive, or hearing testimony from the witnesses you and Annie re-interviewed. Plus, there’s no one left to come to Brian Wayside’s defense except his father, who from what I’m told, has pret
ty much gone off the grid. He might not want to relive it all over again.”
“That’s sad.”
“Yes. But what happened to Rosanna is, too.”
“It’s horrible.” Houston hadn’t watched the video on the flash drive, and he never planned to. “Thank you for acknowledging that, sir.”
The look Ty gave him was almost sympathetic. “Don’t think that because I agree your girlfriend went through hell at the hands of Wayside and others that I’m condoning your actions. You still have a written warning on file from me.”
“I understand, sir.” That, he could deal with. “I wish we could find Mike Rowland, though. I have a few things to say to him.”
Ty gave him a look of incredulity. “Cassidy, are your brain cells no longer working properly? Don’t even think about doing that, or I swear this time I will make sure you’re brought up on charges.”
Houston grunted in response, and kept his gaze off Ty for right now. He knew his Commander was right, but was it fair that Mike had never been held accountable for what he’d done to Rosanna?
“For now, you and Annie are back together as partners. Don’t make me regret not fighting for a suspension, Cassidy.”
“I won’t, sir. Thank you.”
As soon as he and Annie were out of the building and riding to where a witness on a new case awaited, Houston asked if things were okay between them. As much as Annie annoyed the shit out of him on the best of days, it would suck to work with a partner who now hated his guts or had no respect left for him.
“Of course, Cassidy. We’re fine. How is Rosanna?”
“You know something, I think you have a soft spot in there somewhere.”
“Fuck you.”
He couldn’t help laughing. “Good to have you back, Annie. I just wish I knew where Mike was. He should be held accountable.”
“Don’t go there.”
“Ty said the same thing.”
“Seriously, Houston, don’t do it. You’ll be suspended or worse. I doubt he’s ever rid himself of the guilt.”
“Yeah. Probably not.”
“How is Rosanna?” Annie repeated.
