“Very good.”
“Oops, I need to say amen or something, don’t I? Sorry, Lord, I’m new at this. Amen.”
Rayna hugged her. “I’m so happy for you.”
“The next step is to find a church home.” Clay patted her arm. “You can still go to church with Rayna and me Sunday.”
“I will. I promise.”
“While y’all were praying, the doctor came out. Wyatt’s fine.” Clay winked.
“Oh thank goodness.” Kendra covered her face with her hands.
“How about we take you home?” Rayna put her arm around her shoulders.
“Thanks, but I’d like to stay with Wyatt. You two go, and I’ll see you Sunday. Maybe Wyatt will come, too.”
❧
“That was awesome.” Clay turned out of the hospital lot.
“It was. God is awesome.” Rayna blew out a satisfied sigh. “All the time Gabby and I spent witnessing to Kendra, she never showed the slightest interest. In fact, at times, she got downright mad at us.”
“But you kept at it. And all that time, God was tenderizing her heart. You won her over to Christ.”
“I’ve never done that before. It felt great.”
“Don’t you think if God can turn someone like Kendra around, He could work things out for two people meant to be together?”
fifteen
“Please don’t.” A lump lodged in Rayna’s throat.
“You talk about how stubborn I am. But you’re one of the orneriest fillies I’ve ever known.”
She put her finger against his lips, wishing she could silence him with a kiss instead. “I don’t want to fight with you. Let’s just pray about us. Okay?”
He nodded. “I’ll pick you up for church Sunday.”
“You roped me into that one, didn’t you?”
“That’s what you gotta do with ornery fillies sometimes. Besides, Mama’s throwing Lacie a baby shower that afternoon and wants you to help.”
“Anything for Lacie.” Roped her right into spending half the day with him.
❧
In the kitchen, Rayna and Durlene stirred and baked while the men took charge of decorating the great room.
“It was nice meeting your friends this morning.” Durlene dropped a spoon in the soapy-water-filled sink. “Clay said she got saved recently.”
“I was surprised to find them ready and waiting when we arrived to pick them up. I thought she might chicken out, and I didn’t think Wyatt would come.” Had Wyatt spent the night with Kendra? Even if he had, God would convict Kendra on the changes needed in her life.
“I saw Brother Timothy talking with her after the service.”
“Wyatt looked bored and out of place despite Clay’s attempts at conversation.”
“Maybe he’ll come around. At least he heard the Gospel.”
The door opened.
“Hey, I’m making a mess.” Clay leaned against the door facing with a roll of tangled baby-blue crepe paper in each hand. “Maybe you can help.”
“Rayna, I think the decorations need a woman’s touch.” Durlene stirred strawberries into the fruit salad.
Everyone must be in on the conspiracy to inflict Clay on her peace of mind. Rayna snatched one of the rolls from him and headed to the next room.
“Hey, what did I do?”
“You exist.”
“You know, if you’d quit being so stubborn, my existing could be a good thing.”
“Here. Tape this in that corner over there.”
He climbed the step stool and followed her directions.
Backing away from him, she rotated the crepe paper. Ten minutes later, crisscrossed, curling streamers lined the ceiling.
“How’d you do that?”
Rayna shrugged and headed back toward the kitchen, but Clay blocked her path.
“What are you doing?”
“Trying to convince you we should be together.”
His head lowered toward hers.
Turn away. But she couldn’t will herself to do it.
Their lips met and a longing for life with him as his wife filled her soul.
“Hey.” Ty’s voice echoed down the hall.
They sprang apart.
“Our guest of honor has arrived.”
Rayna took a quivery breath.
Ty opened the door and ushered Lacie inside. “Aren’t you a pretty little mama.”
“Thanks.” Lacie positively glowed, though sadness lurked in her eyes. “Ooh, the decorations are pretty. Y’all shouldn’t have gone to such trouble.”
“Rayna whipped it together in minutes. How you feelin’?” Clay gave her a warm hug.
“Good. Really good.”
“You’re almost there.”
“I want you to be there when he’s born.”
While Clay coughed, frowned, and muttered, Rayna tried to contain her laughter.
“I don’t mean in my room. In the waiting room.”
Clay mopped his forehead. “Just try to keep me away.”
“We’d better git, son. More ladies’ll be showing up anytime, and your mama said we had to skedaddle.”
“Let’s go make sure she doesn’t need any more manpower; then we’ll head out the back.”
The two men disappeared down the hall, so similar in carriage, except for Ty’s limp. Clay could be in the same condition in a few more years. A chill crawled over her skin.
“He gives you the shivers, huh?” Lacie nudged her with an elbow. “You need to marry him, you know?”
Rayna closed her eyes.
“I’d like to see y’all happy, and the only way that will happen is if you quit fighting it. Wouldn’t you rather have however much time you can get with the man you love than nothing?”
“But I don’t want to end up. . .”
“Like me? I know. But I’d rather have the memories with Mel and this little treasure.” Lacie rubbed her stomach. “I think somebody’s here.”
Rayna looked out the window to see shower guests arriving and hurried to perform her hostess duties.
❧
A blessed day. Gabby and Adam’s wedding day. Rayna waited in the back of the church with her friend. A stab of envy tightened her stomach. Over the years, she’d attended numerous weddings, but never before had she wished it were her own. With Clay.
The music began. “Ready?” she whispered.
Gabby giggled. “Way past.”
Ushers pulled the double doors open, and Rayna, wearing yellow poof, stutter-stepped down the aisle. The pale color sapped her complexion. The ruffles and lace itched. The result: she was one big splotchy bridesmaid. If only she hadn’t scratched at the neckline, her sensitive skin wouldn’t have responded with hives. But it didn’t matter anyway. Today was Gabby and Adam’s day.
Halfway down the aisle, she saw him. Her rhythm faltered for a moment. Pasting a smile on her face, she stared straight ahead, thankful when she passed him.
She took her place at the front of the sanctuary and, careful to keep her gaze away from the guests, watched Kendra approach. A new Kendra. The jet-black hair with burgundy highlights had softened to a lovely, natural golden brown. The “Wedding March” punctuated the silence, and everyone stood as Gabby made her way down the aisle.
Adam couldn’t take his eyes off his bride.
Rayna stole a quick glance. Her gaze met Clay’s, then darted away.
Gabby’s father, his features taut with emotion, performed his duty and took his seat.
The ceremony got under way. Rayna didn’t hear anything the pastor said, not even any of the vows.
Kendra’s finger dug into the middle of her back. “The ring,” she whispered.
Rayna slid Adam’s wedding band off her thumb just as Gabby turned to claim it.
After the couple exchanged rings, a love song played while they lit the unity candle. Closing her eyes, Rayna tried not to imagine her and Clay standing there gazing at each other.
At the close of the ceremony, the wedding
party stood in the lobby as well-wishers hugged the happy couple. Clay advanced through the line. Typical black jeans, boots, and a tuxedo jacket. And typically, he looked great.
As he hugged Gabby, Rayna made a run for it and hid in a classroom.
❧
As guests filtered into the fellowship hall and the wedding party went back to the sanctuary for pictures, Clay turned to leave. He’d hoped to speak with Rayna. To be close to her, get a whiff of her maddening perfume, but she’d disappeared.
Her head popped out of a doorway.
He backed into an alcove, hoping she hadn’t seen him.
Seconds later, she hurried toward the sanctuary.
“There you are.”
She skidded to a halt with a little yelp.
“Sorry. I always seem to scare the wits out of you.”
She turned toward him. Angry welts covered her face, shoulders, and arms.
He ran his fingertips over her cheek. “Hey, are you okay? Are you allergic to something?”
Her throat muscles constricted. “Lace makes me itch, and sometimes when I scratch, I get hives.”
“Why didn’t you tell Gabby when she picked it out?”
“It’s her wedding day. She ought to be able to have her bridesmaids wear goofy dresses if she wants. Besides, I didn’t think I’d break out over it. How bad is it?”
“Don’t worry. You’re still beautiful. Gabby was looking for you. I think they’re taking pictures.”
“Once they get a look at me, they may decide against it.”
“It probably won’t show. And even if it does, you already stole the bride’s thunder by showing up.” He traced her jawline. “I wish. . .”
“I’d better go.” Gathering her skirts, she charged toward the sanctuary.
❧
By the following Saturday night, Rayna’s hives had subsided. Each jolt the bareback horse inflicted on Clay forced her fingertips deeper into the well-worn knees of her jeans. Her knuckles turned white and she dug her long, perfectly manicured nails farther into her flesh.
Eight long seconds and it ended. Her self-torture eased. Clay successfully dismounted the horse and climbed the arena fence. Both knees stung with the prickling sensation of scrapes. Long, slow breaths. Try to relax.
How could a city girl, who adored everything that glittered, fall in love with a cowboy who swaggered into her world only seven months ago? Now here she sat at the Fort Worth Stockyards on unyielding aluminum seats. She must be crazy. Lacie’s words had echoed in her head for weeks. “You’re missing out on time with the man you love.” Adam’s wedding had only driven home the truth. Without Clay, her life was empty.
God had brought the perfect man into her life. A man who made her long for home and family. And she’d spent the last few months pushing him away. Because of fear.
“I thought that was you, Rayna. Long time, no see. At the arena, I mean.”
She knew the voice, even before shielding her eyes to look up at its owner. Creating a halo effect, Lacie’s bleached blond hair reflected the harsh rays of the fluorescent lights. Rayna jumped to her feet, throwing her arms around her very pregnant friend.
“Are you and Clay back tog—?”
“No. I only came for support.”
“You should have let me know you were coming. I just happened to see you.”
“I honestly didn’t know I was until yesterday. I guess I missed the smell of manure.” Rayna scrunched her nose.
“Such ambience.” Lacie laughed. “But I don’t think that’s what you missed. Clay’s in the lead. Only one more competition tonight.”
The coming event turned Rayna’s blood cold.
The smells, the sights, the sounds. Some of it had grown on her, especially the man who had drawn her here tonight. “Let’s get something to drink.”
Lacie agreed, and they stood then slowly made their way down the steps. “Does Clay know you’re here?”
“No. I didn’t want to sidetrack him, so I waited until things got under way. I got here in time to see the calf roping.” It seemed so cruel to throw the helpless animals down and hog-tie them. Despite Clay’s insistence that the calves weren’t hurt, Rayna had never been convinced.
“Clay doesn’t compete in steer roping anymore. He didn’t think it was right to find a new partner.” Sadness glowed in Lacie’s eyes. “So what have you been doing with yourself?”
“Same old, same old. Working and more working. We just wrapped up a big ad campaign for Total Workout. It’s a new exercise clothing line.”
“Now let’s not beat around the bush. This is Lacie you’re talking to. He misses you. It broke Clay’s heart when things didn’t work out between you two. Broke your heart, too. You know it, and I know it.”
She couldn’t come up with an answer for that one and changed the subject. “You look good.”
“You’re surprised I’m here.” Slim shoulders shrugged. “It still feels odd not to be, and since Clay’s dedicated his season to Mel, I try to support him. And besides, being here, it always makes me feel closer to Mel.” She ran her hand over her swollen abdomen.
“Only a matter of days to go.”
“I can’t wait.” Lacie’s eyes glistened. “I just wish. . .”
The teenage boy at the concession stand took their order.
Lacie pulled herself together to relay the latest rodeo news, and Rayna’s mind wandered back to her first glimpse of the cowboy who had stolen her heart so completely.
“Ma’am. Ma’am!” The boy held a wax-coated paper cup toward her.
“Sorry.” She took the iced tea, a taste she’d developed from spending time at the ranch. After paying, she and Lacie turned back toward the arena.
“Are you gonna stick around after the competition tonight? He’d love to see you. And the way you were straining your eyes earlier, you’d love a closer look at him as well.”
“Ladies and Gentlemen,” the announcer’s voice boomed over the loudspeaker, “and now for our final event of the evening, the bull-riding competition.” He named the lineup.
Rayna took several deep, cleansing breaths, trying not to listen. She gulped the iced tea, but too late, she heard Clay’s name. He’d ride third. At least this sense of dread wouldn’t last the entire event.
“We’d better get back. I still cross all my digits when Clay rides, and that takes a few minutes, especially since I can’t see my toes.” Lacie smiled and linked her arm through Rayna’s. “We just have to place him in God’s hands.”
Unwanted visions and memories threatened to surface. Rayna stopped. “You go on. I can’t watch.”
“You’re staying out here?”
In the lobby with no visibility. Just the way Rayna wanted it. Listening to the events unfold would be bad enough.
Her stomach knotted, her mouth went dry, and bile rose to the back of her throat. Unable to form words, she nodded.
“You sure? Wouldn’t you rather sit with me?”
Swallowing hard, Rayna forced the bitter taste down. “I can’t. I’ll be fine right here.”
“Okay, but don’t you leave without saying good-bye.” With a shrug, Lacie hugged Rayna. “And even after we say good-bye, let’s not be strangers. You call me.”
“I will.” Rayna managed a smile.
“And remember what I said about Clay. He really misses you.” Lacie wagged a crimson fingernail. Another quick hug, and she walked away.
Clay’s ride would be over soon. She’d never promised to stay, only that she’d call.
Oh why had she come? Because she couldn’t stay away. Mel’s death, Lacie’s loneliness, her parents’ happiness, and Adam’s wedding had all ganged up on her. She wanted to wring out whatever time she could have with Clay.
Previous rides Rayna witnessed played over in her memory until the announcer’s voice lassoed her back to the present.
“Next up, Clay Warren riding Rage.”
sixteen
Rayna gasped.
“Yes,
Ladies and Gentlemen, the same bull that almost sent Clay Warren to meet his Maker a few months ago. That’s the luck of the draw.”
She couldn’t stay, not even just to listen. Gasping and stumbling, Rayna bolted for the door. April’s warm evening air smothered her chest, driving the breath from her lungs.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, the moment we’ve all been waiting for. Can Clay Warren tame Rage? Will it be man or beast in this raging rematch?”
Only yards from her car, she stopped. Throughout every fiber of her being, she yearned to flee but couldn’t. Not until she knew whether or not he’d be okay. She pulled out her inhaler, took two puffs, and made a mad dash across the parking lot.
Back to the arena. She had to get inside to see. See the man she loved more than life. The man she had to have, rodeo or not.
The guard scanned her ticket stub and let her pass.
She gasped for breath. A vise tightened around her heart as she hurried through the lobby. Clay tossed about like a rag doll. Each jolt sent a shock wave through his entire body. Time stood still. Surely the clock had malfunctioned.
In Your hands, Lord. His life, our love, our future. In Your hands. The pressure in her chest eased. A sense of peace flowed over her.
The buzzer sounded, and she exhaled.
Clay nimbly jumped from Rage’s back and the barrel man ran to divert the rust-colored bull’s attention. Both men made it to safety. The bullfighters teased and coaxed until the bull exited the arena.
Her breath came more easily. The constriction of her chest eased as she bolted toward the cowboy-congested bucking chutes. Clay perched on the fence with his back toward her as a rock song blared from the speakers.
Unconcerned with onlookers, she cupped her hands around her mouth and screamed his name. “Clay!”
He turned and searched the crowd.
Waving both arms in the air, she called again, “Clay!”
He saw her then. Disbelief played across his handsome features, and he squinted as if not trusting his eyesight. He smiled. His green eyes brightened as he jumped from his perch atop the fence and ran toward her.
Rodeo Dust Page 16
