“That is why she would not kiss me – for I would have known the evil taste of her kiss.”
“No,” thought I, there could not be the sweetness of Morgan’s kiss within that bitch Morganna. She could not have fooled me with her kiss – and she knew it!
Morgan was reading my every thought. I was so ashamed, for I had indeed lost my self in passion and lust – with Morganna!
“Forgive me,” I begged.
“No, brother, no, there is nothing for me to forgive...”
“Yes, I have done a terrible wrong. And for what possible reason would Morganna use her trickery to lie with me?”
Morgan, calmly, yet intently, answered: “For you to get a child upon her.”
“Oh, no! A thousand Times no! I cannot bear the thought...”
As my wits returned, Morganna’s wicked scheme became clear and dawned in perfect light upon me.
“How much a fool could I be not to realise that her meddling – her machinations – would enter into all of this somehow? How could I have been so naïve?”
But then, Morgan reminded me that in the past, Morganna had sometimes fooled even Igraine and the great Merlin.
“Her powers are enormous Arthur. And they are not used for good and righteous intent. They are for the Breaking, rarely the Making.”
I stood as if frozen…
Morgan began to slip into a Trance – right then, right there – right in front of me.
There was a glimmer in the Air, such as there is betimes on a hot Summer Day – how the Air shimmers and moves from side to side in a rippling effect... This shimmering was all around my innocent, beautiful, Morgan. I stood back with a great wonder and respect for whatever it was that she would utter, for I knew that it would be the “Voices of the Stars” who would speak through her mouth – through those beautiful lips.
The Voices spoke... and I heard them... their words branded into my heart... although they never spoke above a lulling whisper – it was as though the words came from her but were already inside my head, creating this eerie echo...
“Everything has a cost Arthur... Now you have tasted the cost of rulership. Too bad, so sad, so soon... For you have met the source of your doom... We see, in your future, many webs of treachery. Your heart, your desires, will ensnare you, Arthur. Although you will give good gifts all the Days of your life, what you gave and what was received last Night will be your strife, your greatest sorrow and the ultimate masque of your Death... Remember, Arthur – everything has a price, for everything there is a cost... ”
Chapter 11
Morgan’s Fear
Morgan
On the first Dark Moon after the Heiros Gamos, my Moon’s blood did not flow as usual but was only spotty. I gave it little thought... However, when upon the Dark Moon following the Crowning, I did not bleed, I wondered if Arthur and I had made a child. I was distressed although I knew it was completely inappropriate to not count this potential as a blessing.
I spoke with Lady Vivianne about it. I have tried never to be a hypocrite and so I told her of my fears. She, as it was her station to do, reminded me how Sacred any child born of the Fertility Rites was. Then she spoke to me as lovingly as if I were a daughter of her womb.
“Morgan you have been put into the middle of a dangerous and sorrowful intrigue. Ye, The Merlin told me of Morganna’s treachery.”
“How does he know? Arthur would never have exposed my shame to him...”
“Your shame? No my dear, Arthur would never betray you in any manner. For true, he said nothing to Gwyddion whilst he thought it was you who had come to him in the Night. You know that Arthur would protect you at all costs. But after he spoke with you upon the next morn and realised that it was Morganna who had come to him, he told The Merlin everything.”
“Everything?”
I felt my face heating... I blushed again. I could not hide my thoughts...
“Oh Gwyddion... How can I ever look into your eyes again if Arthur has told you everything of my passion in our Sacred Marriage bed?”
Vivianne looked right through me.
“No, Morgan, not everything – everything of Morganna’s treachery.”
“But still, Mother, how can I be … how can one thing be separated from the other? Is this how it will always be – that I will never be allowed my own private thoughts or feelings? Must my inner, shadow self be exposed to all just because I am the King’s sister?”
“Morgan, you are ill from worry and fear. Many Times such emotions will disrupt our body’s normal flow of Moon Blood. You must rest and relax. To this end, I relieve you of all your duties here at the Order – except for your Bee tending, for I know that their keeping is not like work to you, as they are your beloved companions. Still, I suggest that you temporarily turn most of your chores with them over to your helper Kia, so that you may spend some of your Nights away. For one entire Moon’s Dance you will rest... And then we will see what happens.
“But Morgan, my dear, just think of this: what a blessing and protection to Arthur’s Kingdom it would be if a child of his was conceived by and born of a Goddess – and this child having been conceived before what Morganna brings forth from her evil Magic!”
“Oh Lady, do you ‘See’ that Morganna is with child?”
“Do not worry about that now Morgan, just rest.”
I was not blind to the fact that she had not answered either of my questions...
“Just rest...” she had said. Reluctantly, but successfully, that was what I did.
I visited the people of the villages surrounded the Tor and even some of those across the Inland Sea. I watched them Weave their Summer baskets as adeptly as the Robins had woven their nests at Winter’s End. I gifted the folk with honey from our Bees and cheese from our dairy. They in turn invited me to eat, sing, and dance with them at their evening relaxations.
I realised that my Days in service to the Order were far different from the lives these people led. These precious Days reminded me of my childhood with my dear Mother. How I missed her now...
The villagers shared their innocent gossips with me and even told stories of legends – which had grown and, I am sure, been much embellished over the centuries – of the secret Cave whose entrance is in the bottom of the Tor. Which, they said, no one had entered since Time out of memory – for it led directly to the Underworld.
“And no one will ever enter it!” quoth they.
They continued, “There have been a few great Magicians in the long ago past who had dared to enter... but they were never seen or heard from again.
“The legends of the ‘Cave of Nodens’ say that, ‘He and his minions of the lowest levels of the Underworld had filled the Cave with Crystals, encrusting them into the walls and ceiling – as a lure to all who were bent toward temptations of riches – or were pridefully unable to resist a challenge.
“But... at its deepest, darksome recesses, just beyond the brilliant sight, is a Whirlwind – which it is said – draws the seeker ever farther within...’
“So, no one would ever dare think it worth the cost to enter, my Lady!”
I gravely agreed, all the while smiling on the inside of myself.
But then a prickling of my skin began... I felt the wooziness come upon me... Then the “Voices” spoke: “A good place to hide what must not be found. Remember this, Morgan of the Woods.”
Then all the world was back to my listless Day, and to my enjoyment of the company of the villagers.
I also drank each Day from the two Sacred Wells and asked the Spirits of the Springs to calm me and to help insure that everything “lead to a good outcome.”
On the Night of the Full Moon I lay myself across the green Star Stone atop the Tor. As I lay there my thoughts drifted into less tense regions... Whilst trying so hard to relax, I thought of many diverse things; such as the one I have written below...
Hidden away in our Order’s secret library are manuscripts designated as “Books of the Knowledge of othe
r Mystery Schools.” Many of these books and scrolls are very old and fragile, as they have been in our library since before the Time of the Roman invasion. And so, long ago, because of their great value and irreplaceability, one of the Ladies of the Lake set our scribes to the task of copying the entire library of manuscripts that we hold. This work continues to our Day.
Not long after I had attained my Enchantress status in the Order, I asked Lady Vivianne if I might have access to some of our copies of these writings. She granted permission. I cannot express what a thrill this was to me.
One whole section of our vault is a collection noted as: “The Scrolls of Khemet.” The land of Khemet, now called Aegyptos in the tongue of the Greeks – or, Ageyptus in the Roman – meaning ‘the land South of the Aegean,’ lies far to the East of Our Fair Isles.
Within the pages of these books I found diagrams and explanations of many Magical and medical techniques, along with other scientific knowledge, far advanced beyond what Western cultures now understand. Most of these had been written and copied in the Greek tongue and so was I able to read them.
I was especially interested in the books of the “House of Life of the Memphian Priesthood.” Their school and Temple, which they termed a “House of Life,” was dedicated to the teachings and disciplines of their creator God, Ptah – and of their great Lioness Goddess Sekhmet, whose name means power.
One of these is entitled: “Discipline of the Understandings of the Five Bodies of Humankind.” In this book I found detailed explanations of these five bodies.
They teach that there are ‘Light Spheres’ – in the Spirit energy fields that surround every Human, Animal, Tree, Stone, and all other living things.
The book says that every Human has five bodies – each one with its own energy ‘Light Sphere’ system. They are:
The Body of Flesh
The Body of Thoughts
The Body of Dreams
The Body of Magic
The Divine Spirit Body
Each of these bodies, in succession, is more ethereal, less knowable or controllable than the one before it.
The “Body of Flesh” is, of course, important, for it is what binds and defines us as Humans. Most people think that it is their only body.
The second is the “Thought Body.” It is the self-conscious body. This body believes itself to be the Only One. Whilst what it is, in truth, is only that part of us that “thinks.” It believes only that which it perceives – can see, hear, taste, touch, or smell... It believes that It is the whole self.
The third body is the “Dream Body.” The Dream Body is the gateway that allows entrance into our true selves. It is the Body that receives messages, Visions, and Dreams. It is the body through which the “Voices” speak. Some call the ability to know and use this third body – “Having the Sight.” Yet, Dreams come unbidden to all people.
The forth body is the “Magical Body.” It is the first one that is capable of ‘Making,’ creating, or manifesting… It can, at will, reach out into the Otherworlds to use the stuff of ‘The Making’ to effect change in the perceived reality of the world of form. This is what is called ‘the bending’ or ‘Magic.’ It gives the Adept – at their will – access to communicate with Gods, Ancestors, Spirits, Animals, Trees, Stars, Stones, Springs, and so forth...
The fifth body is the least accessible and most ethereal of all. It is the “Spiritual Body.” The “Spiritual Body,” as the old tome quotes, is the becoming. It is that which enables one to join with the Divine Ones at will or need: To walk amoung the Great Gods and Goddesses, even the Great Mother GODDESS, in the Land of Myth – in the Time of Making, when the First Word was sounded, which Time was and is the Eternal Present... Few Humans – whilst alive in flesh and bone – will ever reach the level of Enlightenment necessary to access and use the “Spiritual Body.”
I will share a Sacred Secret with you. That secret is that the Cosmic Creation did not come to be in one great event, but is continuing even unto our Day... It is becoming, and will continue to do so until the penultimate word of the Unmaking is sounded at the Time of the Great Dissolution... This Secret came to us by way of my Mother’s Ancestors.
But back to the Khemet books...
Those Adepts who have obtained the level of knowledge and competency to first be aware of, and then use, all of the five bodies, must align the energy Spheres within each of these bodies first – and then accomplish the ultimate achievement, which is to align – with each other – all of the five Bodies. This, it is said, is the state of perfect Human balance, harmony, and Spiritual ascension – from whence comes our term En-light-ened.
I have read in the old tome that the Priests of Khemet call this quality Maat... Maat is depicted in their Sacred glyphs as a woman with a Vulture feather atop her head. She is the Goddess of truth and justice. The principle of Maat, the book says, is and always has been the foundation and goal of their culture. It means, as I understand it, order – the proper way of things – of all and everything.
Theirs is an interesting philosophy...
Their true culture, it is said, has lasted, with little change, for many and more millenniums, even through Greek and early Roman domination. Their longevity speaks well for their “Maat.”
Now, it is not only the Aegyptian Priests who have sent emissaries to the Isle of Apples with ancient scrolls and books to be left safely in the Order’s keeping. The Magi of many traditions have known of and revered the Wisdom of our Order. How blessed are we to be entrusted with their precious volumes.
Perhaps it is as my Tribe’s legends tell – that one of the one hundred boats, such as that which arrived on these Fair Isles, went to Aegyptos, to bring the same Wisdoms to them... and one to... Well... or, perhaps it is simply that the Mysteries are the Mysteries and truth is truth.
It is a fact that I have heard many stories of great Christian Mystics who understand these same Truths, as well. I have wondered many Times if these Mysteries are written on the hearts of all Humans – there, awaiting our discovery.
Perhaps that is what The Merlin means when he says that “All the Gods are ONE.”
These things – which passed through my thoughts whilst lying upon the Star Stone – seemed to lighten my burdens. Then I realised that I was not resting.
“Rest?” I laughed at myself. And to my surprise that laugh, in and of itself, was very healing. It has always been hard for me to silence my thoughts, for they relentlessly roll over me as do waves upon the sea...
The next two weeks went by in pursuits of seemingly decadent pleasures.
Upon the Day that the Dark Moon would be seen – or rather not seen – in the Night Sky, I fretfully wrung my hands and generally fidgeted the hours away.
Then, blessing of all blessings – as I saw it then – it happened. My blood began to flow.
Now, it is our custom that during our Moon Blood Time, that we would go to each of the Sacred Wells to cleanse ourselves with the Holy Waters. Great jugs were left at the Springs for this very purpose. As it was my wont to do, I would scoop up a small gob of red iron soil around the Red Spring – and with this I would cover my face and hair.
Our Healers tell that the clay will draw out of ourselves sickening poisons – and will make smooth our skin – whilst nourishing our hair so that it may be lustrous and strong. It is also a symbolic Rite of banishing all painful emotions that we have held within ourselves.
Then I lay in the Sun. This I did for a long Time that Day, for it was warm and beautiful. However, it was the custom of my sisters on these occasions to spend at least the Time it took to Chant an age old round:
“Oh Lady of darksome and ancient fame
At the crossroads of the Moon we call Thy name...
Aft’ Thy bow hast flown arrows for Love’s sweet repast
And Thy deepened long shadows upon Earth hast cast...
Whence Thy quicksilver dance hast waxed and hast waned
The Magic of women can ne’er be o’er
reigned...
One Day and one half whilst Thy face ne’er shows
Black be the Sky... whence our Moon blood flows...”
We do this, not for any idea that we are “unclean” – as is the thinking of some during this very natural function of our womanly bodies – but more it was as an honouring of our feminine Magic and gifts of Motherhood. By partaking in the goodness of the Holy Waters, we are reminded that all life sprang forth from the great Cosmic Sea. In this we may share in the realization that even fresh Waters are a Sacred representation of the gifts of the Mother of all.
And so my life continued on as usual. I tended my Bees. They buzzed with me. I sang to them. And all had returned to normality.
I must admit that my personal feelings would have been devastated if I had been pregnant with Arthur’s child and had to face Gwyddion with this news. This would have embarrassed me so...
My feelings toward Gwyddion were... complicated.
A feeling of freedom had overtaken me. I once again felt the Spirit within me of the child – “Morgan of the Woods.”
Chapter 12
Of Names, Blood, and Other Topics
Vivianne, Lady of the Lake
Many people wonder how I came to have such a foreign name. They wonder because, I am – as are most of the women here at the Order – of the blood of the ancient Tribes, who lived on these, Our Fair Isles, before all others. It is obvious that we are of this blood because our skin colour is much darker than that of the Clans, Romans, or Saxons, who live about us, and we are smaller of stature.
The “Old Dark Tribes,” as they are now called, live in vast and darkling, almost impenetrable Forests, so as to keep themselves hidden away from “The Others” or “The Strangers,” who, as they see it, are invaders of their lands.
Mostly now are the Old Tribes gathered in the area known as Dumnonia, near to the craggy coast of the Western Sea. There are formed the fabled Forests whose Trees grow into beautiful, frightful, or grotesque – depending upon one’s perspective – gnarled and knotted twisted giants. From Time out of memory these Ancestor Trees have stretched their limbs higher up into the foggy Mists than the eye can see. It is perched within these boughs that most of their dwellings are found.
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