Still Go Crazy (Swoon Series Book 5)

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Still Go Crazy (Swoon Series Book 5) Page 10

by J. H. Croix


  I squeezed her hand and took an opportunity. “Go ahead and be pissed off.”

  When I glanced sideways, Grace rolled her eyes so hard they were at risk of rolling out of the sockets.

  “I’m obviously no expert on headaches, but after being with my father through his diagnosis, I know doctors tend to rule out all kinds of things before they settle on anything. Do you know what they’ve ruled out so far?”

  “They were checking for allergies at my first appointment. I’m told that migraines are not all that unusual. I guess because a history of mild seizures runs in my father’s family, they want to do some tests for that. Even though I’ve never had a seizure in my life.”

  “Your mom mentioned that.”

  “Shocking,” Grace said, her tone dry as chalk.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Grace

  The nurse leaned over me, placing a blanket over my legs. “I need a blanket for this?” I asked.

  She smiled as she looked up and pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. “Well, if you’re not cold yet, you will be. These rooms are freezing.”

  “Oh, okay. How long will this take?”

  Turning away, she tapped on a few keys on the laptop on a rolling computer stand with a stool attached. With her eyes on the screen, she replied, “It depends.”

  “Will I be able to get my results today?”

  She looked my way finally. “If Dr. Canton is available when we’re done, yes.”

  “You won’t be able to tell me?”

  Her mouth twisted to the side. “Sorry, but no. We’re not supposed to interpret the results.”

  “Even if you have an opinion?”

  She smiled. “Even if I have an opinion.”

  I took a deep breath, letting it out with a sigh. “I sure hope Dr. Canton is available.”

  “She’s definitely here, and she told us to come get her when we’re done. The only thing that might interfere is if an emergency comes up. That’s why we can’t make any promises.”

  She leaned her hips against the stool, her eyes looking to the clock situated above the door, almost in line with my feet where I lay on the cool table. Angling my head back, I eyed the round tube I was about to enter.

  I was starting to fret inside, worrying that Boone had somewhere he needed to be. I hadn’t even thought to ask him if he needed to go to work or had anywhere else to be. Rolling my head to the side, I asked the nurse, “Is it possible somebody could check with my friend? I just realized that I don’t know if he needs to be back at a certain time, and I have no idea how long this might take.”

  “Of course. I’ll go check with the receptionist right now.”

  “That’d be great. Thanks.”

  After she disappeared from the room, my mind started to squirrel about, grabbing little things to be anxious about, like whether I’d remembered to schedule Wayne’s annual vet appointment. That was a better option than worrying about brain cancer. I refused to vocalize that fear out loud out of superstition that would make it come to fruition.

  My mind spun to the drive here with Boone. After his cautious questions, I turned the radio up and told him I wanted to be distracted. He went along with it, even belting out one of our old favorite songs with me.

  I was smiling to myself when the nurse returned. “I spoke to him personally because the receptionist was on the phone. He said to stop worrying about it, he can wait as long as you need him to wait. And honey,” she said, her brows hitching up, “your boyfriend is definitely easy on the eyes.”

  I opened my mouth to explain he wasn’t exactly my boyfriend, but thought better of it. I didn’t need to be getting into details about Boone right before I had my head examined. Literally.

  “He is pretty handsome, huh?”

  “Oh yes. But better than that, he clearly cares about you. He’s all worried.”

  My heart skipped a few beats, and I felt a smile blooming straight from the center of my chest. Boone was stripping away all of my defenses, and most of me wanted to just tumble into it. And yet, it made me so nervous. He had panicked once before and look how that went.

  Fortunately, or not, the door swung open, and a man entered the room. He wore a white coat with short dark hair trimmed close to his head. The nurse gestured to him. “This is Dan. He’s our MRI tech.”

  Dan was way too cheerful for my mood, casting a blinding smile in my direction. His teeth were perfectly straight and extremely white. “You must be Grace,” he began. “How are you feeling today?”

  “Fine,” I replied. “Can we just do this?”

  I heard the nurse snort slightly, but she bit back a laugh, turning to look at the computer screen.

  “We sure can. All right, I’m sure Sally already reviewed everything, but we’re going to slide you into the MRI. You’ll hear some clicking sounds while the machine does its work.”

  I nodded. “Yep, she told me everything.”

  Cheerful Dan nodded and got to work. Once I was in there, the rhythmic pinging sounded as described. I was relieved the nurse had gotten me a blanket. It was a bit chilly in there. Afterward, I walked down the hallway, and Sally assured me Dr. Canton would be checking with me shortly.

  Walking out into the waiting area, my eyes landed on Boone. He might as well have been an actual magnet for me. The moment I saw him with a magazine in his lap as he flipped through the pages with one hand, my heart practically started cheering, each beat an enthusiastic clap.

  As though Boone sensed I was there, his head lifted, and his eyes locked with mine from across the room. No matter how many times I tried to tell myself I’d gotten over Boone, I so totally hadn’t. The instant our eyes met, the rest of the room fell away. It didn’t matter that this was a crowded waiting area in a medical clinic. It didn’t matter that there was a baby crying in the corner with a mother rocking her and trying to shush her. It didn’t matter that there was an elderly couple complaining about how long the wait was for their appointment.

  The only thing that mattered was Boone. His brown eyes held mine, and he set the magazine aside, standing when I stopped in front of him. He reached for my hand, catching one in his.

  “Babe, you’re freezing,” he said.

  Before I realized what was happening, he folded me into his arms. He was warm and strong and smelled clean, like fresh laundry and soap. A hint of his musky scent broke through, and I tucked my head against his shoulder, just breathing him in.

  “It was cold in there,” I murmured into his chest.

  “Grace?” a voice called from the front of the waiting area.

  Boone loosened his arms as I turned to look over my shoulder. The doctor stood there, smiling, her eyes bouncing curiously from me to Boone and back.

  This was only my second appointment, but I had instantly discovered I didn’t like being here alone. My tendency to ruminate didn’t help matters at all.

  “Want to come back with me?” I asked as I peered up at him.

  “You sure?” His familiar gaze searched mine. It was almost laughable now how hard I had worked to completely ignore him for close to a year. I could be stubborn.

  “I’m sure.”

  Boone’s hand slid down my spine in a warm pass, coming to rest at the curve of my waist. For a moment, I was stuck in place. Which made no sense. I mean, we were in a doctor’s office for crying out loud. With an audience.

  It felt so good to have Boone right here with his arm encompassing me just enough to keep me in the orbit of us. Back when we had been together before, Boone had always been an affectionate guy, pretty handsy in fact. More than once, we’d gotten caught making out by my parents, or his mother. Nothing too scandalous, just kisses. Boone always took it in stride and even tolerated my father’s lectures.

  “You ready?” His question came right by my ear, his voice low.

  The sound of his gruff voice and the soft feathering of his breath just beside my neck sent a hot shiver chasing down that side of my body and goosebumps prickling
over the surface of my skin.

  “Oh! Yes.” With a little nudge of his palm, I began walking quickly across the room.

  Dr. Canton’s curious eyes flicked from me to Boone when we reached her. “Come on back,” she said with a smile as she held the door and gestured us through.

  Moments later, we were in her office. Looking at me, she said, “I presume you’re comfortable having him present.”

  “Oh yes. This is Boone. Boone Reeves.”

  Dr. Canton smiled politely at Boone. “Nice to meet you.” Looking back in my direction, she added, “All I have is good news.”

  My stomach still churned, and I managed to nod. “Okay?”

  “We’ve ruled out all potential significant concerns. I think it’s one of two things. You could simply be susceptible to migraines. That happens. It’s unfortunate, and they’re miserable, but that may be all it is.”

  Impatient, I jumped in. “Well, what’s the other thing?”

  “I’m recommending you have a chat with your OB/GYN. You’re taking oral contraceptives, correct?”

  I felt suddenly self-conscious. I mean, here we were discussing my birth control. With the doctor. In front of Boone.

  “Um, yes.”

  “Well, a potential side effect of some oral contraceptives is migraines.”

  Staring at her, my mouth fell open. “Do you mean I can’t take birth control?”

  Dr. Canton shook her head. “No. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m suggesting you talk with your OB/GYN and try a different variation. There are many options, including an IUD, the shot, and more. I’m suggesting this because, if that’s the cause, your OB/GYN will be able to help narrow it down.”

  “Okay. Is there anything else I should do today?”

  Dr. Canton smiled. “Nope. I’ve sent over your information to her. She’ll have what we’ve already ruled out and the history of migraines you reported, and so on. I’d recommend you schedule to see her as soon as possible.”

  At that moment, Dr. Canton’s pager beeped, and she glanced at it where it sat on the counter beside her. “I need to go, my next appointment is here.” As I stood, she reached out and squeezed my shoulder lightly. Her gaze shifted to Boone. “Very nice to meet you, Boone.” She held out her hand, and he shook it quickly.

  A few minutes later, we were walking outside, and Boone’s hand was warm on my back. Once I was seated in the passenger seat, and he started the truck, I let out a big sigh. “Well, that sucks.”

  “It doesn’t suck,” he replied, his eyes wide as he glanced in my direction before backing out of the parking space. “They ruled out all the scary stuff. That’s fucking awesome.”

  Staring at him, the tension I hadn’t realized I’d been holding in a tight ball in my chest loosened and unspooled. “I guess you’re right. But I wanted an answer. Something definitive.”

  Boone looked my way again and nodded. “I get it. Maybe you’re not that relieved, but I am. In fact, I think we should get lunch to celebrate.”

  “Do you need to get back for work?

  The steering wheel slid under his hand as he turned out of the parking space. “No. I’m not on call today. What about you?”

  “I actually don’t have to work tonight.”

  “Then, let’s eat,” he said with a slow smile.

  A few hours later, I sat in the truck beside Boone, my body fairly humming with need. All we’d done was have lunch and run some errands afterwards. That’s it.

  Yet, sitting across from Boone at the deli and staring into his brown gaze had left me all hot and bothered. I’d never have thought I could stay all twisted up and needy inside for hours, but that’s what happened. I was coming to discover that all it took was being near Boone to make me half lose my mind.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Boone

  At some point along the drive back to Stolen Hearts Valley, I glanced sideways. Grace’s head was thrown back in a laugh. I wanted to freeze-frame that moment.

  During the years my father had been sick, I’d learned how to compartmentalize. That ability served me well as a first responder. I could set my feelings aside, almost like putting them on a shelf to deal with when I had more emotional stamina.

  I hadn’t realized I’d been doing that very thing ever since I’d overheard the conversation between Grace and the receptionist, weeks ago now at the doctor’s office. Although that interaction had served as the flashpoint to get me to finally stop giving Grace space—and for that, I would be forever grateful—I hadn’t even allowed myself to contemplate how much concern I was holding clenched tightly inside.

  Between the vagueness of the situation and the night I saw her with that migraine, my worry would’ve torn me apart if I’d let myself focus on it. Instead, I had tucked it away. The relief of hearing from her doctor that all the worst options were ruled out was immense.

  The drive back to Stolen Hearts Valley was reminiscent of days gone by between us. Grace wasn’t holding that cold distance in front of her like a shield; we didn’t have lingering worry rumbling under the surface of every moment. Instead, Grace belted out songs with me and laughed.

  By the time we exited off the highway onto the winding road that led us to Stolen Hearts Valley, a light, icy cold drizzle had started to fall. Grace commented, “We need to get takeout pizza and have a fire when we get back.”

  “I’m in.”

  For an instant, I wanted to point out that it felt like old times. But I sensed that labeling it, identifying it out loud, might make Grace skittish. She was skittish by nature and even more so than she’d ever been before.

  The massive misunderstanding with the way things played out between us before certainly didn’t help matters, and I knew it.

  “Anybody actually deliver pizza?” I asked as I turned onto the exit off the highway and came to a careful stop at the intersection.

  Grace rolled her head sideways on the seat. She had kicked her shoes off, and her feet were resting on the dashboard, her striped socks barely visible in the almost darkness. “Uh-huh,” she said, nodding as she lifted a hand to catch a lock of her hair and twirl it around her finger.

  “Well, that’s new.”

  “You’ve been here almost a year, Boone. How do you not know we can get delivery?”

  I got lost for a minute staring into Grace’s smoke silver eyes. When she arched a brow in question, I gave myself a mental shake. “I don’t know. I usually just grab something at the deli at the grocery store.”

  My heart pumped hard and fast in my chest as Grace held my gaze, lifting her chin slightly. “It’s rainy and cold, and I don’t want to be out. Get us home, and I’ll order pizza once we’re there.”

  “Bossy much?” I teased.

  She laughed. “Yes. Now drive.”

  Joy sent my pulse racing. Looking back toward the road, the sound of my blinker echoed in the cab of my truck during a gap between songs. It wasn’t that I didn’t know what I wanted. I knew exactly what I wanted.

  Grace. And the chance to get it right this time.

  Despite that certainty, it felt as if there was so much happening under the surface. Like this. How could it feel so meaningful to get pizza?

  Grace’s resistance to me had been so powerful, I felt as if I were trying to adjust the speed, shifting gears to make sure everything ran smoothly.

  Once we exited off the highway, the winding roads were icy. I drove carefully, far too aware of how treacherous a rainy night on slick roads in these mountains could lead to disaster. The rain picked up, coming down in sheets, blurring my view with the windshield wipers barely able to keep pace by the time I pulled up in front of the duplex. Leaning back between the seats, I grabbed my rain jacket and handed it to Grace.

  “Do you have another one?” she asked immediately when she looked over at me, her voice almost drowned out by the rain pounding on the roof of my truck.

  I shook my head. “Don’t worry about it. It’s maybe ten steps. I can handle it.”


  Grace rolled her eyes, not even bothering to put the raincoat on. She lifted it over her head as she leaped out of the truck and dashed to the doorstep. I was right behind her, and we stopped under the small overhang that protected the main entrance. When I looked down to find Grace’s upturned face, her eyes sparkling and her lips pink, I didn’t even think.

  Bending low, I caught her chin with my hand and kissed her, savoring the sweet little hitch that came from the back of her throat. Her skin was damp and cool, but her lips were warm. Angling my head to the side, I let my tongue tease against hers. For just a moment, I forgot where we were. When she flexed into me and shivered slightly, awareness broke through the haze of need and emotion clouding my thoughts, and I broke away.

  After fumbling with the keys, somehow we managed to get through the door and up the stairs. Once we reached the landing, I glanced down. “Your place or mine?”

  “Mine,” she said with a slow smile that never failed to elicit a hard kick of my heart. “I have to feed Wayne.”

  “I didn’t want to assume.”

  Grace stilled for a moment, one hand curled on the doorknob as she looked up at me. I didn’t know what thoughts passed through her mind, but after a beat, she nodded.

  Once we were inside, I watched as she fussed over Wayne and got him fresh water and food. She’d handed me the rain jacket, which I shook off in the entryway. Toeing off my boots, I placed them by the door where she left her shoes.

  My entire body felt tight. Need had its claws deep in me, and timing had nothing to say about this. I felt as if the guardrails I’d tried so valiantly to hold in place had fallen, and we were careening off the tracks.

  Grace turned, her eyes catching mine as I walked toward where she stood by the kitchen window. The air felt electric—loaded and heavy—the way it felt when thunder was rumbling and lightning was about to strike. The rain poured down outside, a cacophony of raindrops striking the roof.

  She took several steps in my direction as I closed the distance between us. We stopped, maybe a foot between us, beside the small island that separated the living room from the kitchen.

 

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