“I see,” said the employer. “I understand, and hope your daughter is feeling better very soon.” The words were spoken kindly enough, so why did they sound so judgmental?
“I’m sorry,” the prince continued. “I really was starting to enjoy the assignment. Perhaps whoever takes over would like to use some of my notes….”
“That won’t be necessary,” the employer replied. “But thank you.” And the prince realized he was dismissed. His face burned as he left.
“Come with me,” he said to his daughter, and they left the building. He was profoundly happy to be out of there. He mused that to try and build a career while raising children was just setting oneself up for failure. With a shock he realized that that was precisely what his wife always said.
“We are going to play a game,” he told his daughter, putting the miserable experience behind him. “You are going to pretend that I am the sick child and you are the mother.”
His daughter giggled. “Why are we going to do that?” she asked.
He could hardly explain to her that it was because he hadn’t the faintest idea of what her mother did with her while she was sick, so he said, “Because it will be fun.” And as it turned out this was a sufficient explanation for a small child.
“Okay,” she agreed easily.
And so the prince spent the rest of the day learning how to care for a sick little girl.
At about this time Princess Femina was arriving at the destination of her errand for the foreman. She entered a tidy office where she was greeted by a woman with a pinched face. The woman looked at her as if to say, “What now?”
“I have a message for you,” Princess Femina explained, handing the woman the missive and then plopping down into a nearby chair. Perhaps she could strike up a conversation with the woman, and thereby delay her return to the work site. She watched as the woman read the message.
“Great,” said the woman with annoyance.
“Bad news?” Princess Femina asked her.
The woman looked up with annoyance. “I hardly think it is any concern of yours,” she said snappishly.
Princess Femina was instantly offended. “Well!” she exclaimed. “There is no need to be such a bitch about it. I was just trying to be friendly.”
The woman glared at her.
As unpleasant as the woman was, Princess Femina loathed the thought of going back to the wretched work site. Still, it was terribly discomforting to be stared at with such open disdain. At length Princess Femina got up and left the woman alone.
Several hours later, just when Princess Femina thought the day could not get more unpleasant there arrived to the work site a man she recognized as her husband’s employer. And he was heading straight for her.
“What did you say to Ms. Hardgrave?” he asked without preamble.
“Who?” replied Princess Femina.
“My secretary,” said the employer.
“I hardly said a word to her,” replied Princess Femina. “She was so unpleasant I was obliged to leave there as quickly as possible.”
“Well, she has filed a complaint against you and the company,” said the employer. “And she has left the office, claiming abuse and harassment.”
“What?” exclaimed Princess Femina. “Why that—!” She tried to pull down the sense of rage and injustice that was rising within her, and added more calmly, “She was rude and unprofessional and I told her so. That is all.”
“I know that Ms. Hardgrave can be extremely difficult to work with,” said her husband’s employer. “But need I remind you that since the king’s decrees about women’s rights, as encouraged by his daughters and your own wife in particular, we are obliged do as they wish and pretend that everything is fine.”
“I don’t believe that!” she said, even more outraged than before. It was as shocking as if he had told her that she had two heads. Was that really how the men of the kingdom viewed women? Was all of their deference merely pretended, in an effort to patronize them as if they were spoiled children?
“Enough with the jokes,” said the prince’s employer. “You more than anybody else know how to keep your opinions to yourself, being married as you are, so why in god’s name would you have said such a thing to Ms. Hardgrave?”
“I said it because it was the truth,” raged Princess Femina. “And I will smash that bitch in two if she does not admit it.”
The prince’s employer stared at him in horror. “Are you ill?” he asked. “Perhaps you have gone mad?”
Princess Femina felt sick. “I must speak to the king,” she said.
It was very late when Princess Femina finally arrived home, thanking heaven her father, the king, had been able to clear up the horrible mess with Ms. Hardgrave. It had been difficult convincing her father that it was really her in her husband’s body, and even more difficult to explain the encounter with Ms. Hardgrave. What would have happened to her—or her husband rather—if she had not been the king’s daughter? She was so tired and hungry…she had never before felt so hungry…and she dropped herself down on her favorite lounge chair. Her eyes drooped as she dozed off to sleep.
“You’re here,” she heard her own voice say.
“Mmm,” she murmured.
“I don’t suppose you remembered that it was your turn to provide dinner?”
She wondered suddenly how it was possible that he had not strangled her. She felt him collapse next to her on the divan. She looked up to see her own face staring exhaustedly back at hers. She laughed. “You, too?” she asked.
“Let’s just say I got a new perspective on things today,” he told her.
“Me, too,” she admitted.
But neither one elaborated.
“I’m starving and I did not even think to bring dinner,” she admitted.
“I figured you would be tired and hungry so I made dinner. I was only teasing you a minute ago.”
“Really?” she asked.
“Well, as it turned out I spent the day at home nursing the little one, so…”
“Is she in bed?”
“Yes.”
Princess Femina stared at her own face, searching for her husband somewhere in the expression. She wondered if she would have made dinner for him had she been inside her body today. It was amazing how satisfying it was to be treated with kindness after such a trying day.
“Thank you,” she said, meaning it.
He smiled. How nice it was to be appreciated! His day had been difficult and emotionally exhausting but he realized this was what made it all worthwhile. He wondered if he had ever remembered to thank his wife for all the times she had pulled herself away from her daily interests to care for their child and provide him with a warm inviting home and a delicious dinner. Perhaps she would not feel the need to point these things out so often if he would show a little appreciation.
Pulling herself up with difficulty, Princess Femina went into the kitchen and ate like a horse. It was incredible to be able to eat without a thought to her weight. She spied her husband eating with equal relish and raised her eyebrows.
“You are not planning to eat all that, are you?” she asked him.
He laughed, and then forced a serious face. Imitating her as well as he was able, he said with mock severity, “Just what are you implying?”
She laughed. “I am not insulting you…or me…I’m merely trying to keep from becoming a blimp.”
“You could never be that,” he told her.
“Yes, well, that is nice of you, but if you eat all that I will leave you in my body until you lose the weight.”
“Okay, okay,” he agreed, pushing away the plate. He could not live with that for all the food in the kingdom. “You know,” he said after a moment, “it must really be awful to have to watch everything you eat.”
“Well, women generally gain weight faster than men for some reason,” she told him. She forgot to add that in his case it might be that he was burning more calories, too.
She ate to her satis
faction and then pushed her plate away.
“I’m going to bed,” she announced.
“Me, too,” said the prince.
She went to their bedroom and took off her clothes with her husband following the same routine behind her. She looked up suddenly and caught sight of her former body, fully stripped. She suddenly felt a dizzying surge as she became almost immediately aroused. The feeling was overpowering. “Oh, my!” she exclaimed.
The prince looked up and noticed her predicament. But to his surprise, there was no immediate surge of anything happening in the body he inhabited. There were some confusing emotions and very mild sensations, but other than that he might have been dead below the waist. In spite of this, he was curious.
“We’ll never get another chance to see how it feels from the other side,” he told her.
“I agree,” she said. She, too, was curious, but more than that the body she possessed was taking over everything, forcing her to move toward the naked body that stood before her.
They went to the bed. The prince lay down and she heard him laugh nervously. “I’m not sure I’m operating this body correctly,” he admitted. “Is there a button you push or something?”
But the princess was too preoccupied to explain anything to him about how her body worked. She could feel the blood rushing into her lower body and she suddenly found that she cared very little about anything else. She mounted her former body and thrust herself instinctively inside; once, twice and the third time she cried out as a searing rush of heat surged through her and she felt the hot liquid shoot through the shaft. “Oh, my god,” she said.
“What the—!” she heard her husband gasp. “Well, my dear, I do think you’ve made a new record for me.”
“I couldn’t help it,” she said, trying to recover. Now she wanted to sleep.
“Uh, actually, you can help it,” he corrected her. “But now if you would be so kind as to tell me how this body works so I can have some enjoyment, too.”
She groaned. It was only fair, she supposed. She leaned up on one elbow. “Open your legs,” she told him. He obeyed and at last he felt some twinges of excitement. They were infinitely more subtle than what he was used to, though. It suddenly occurred to him that these sensations would need to be encouraged and stroked so they could build into something larger, unlike his own arousal, which came on like an eruption that needed to be contained.
Princess Femina settled between her husband’s open legs and stared with new perspective at her private area. How lovely it appeared to male eyes! It reminded her of an exotic flower, whose scented blossoms curled forth to entice its prey in closer, tempting him to delve between the delicate petals for the promise of nectar. She stared at it for several moments, causing the prince to feel more twinges of excitement and a meandering yearning for more. The sight of his wife from within his eyes, staring at her own body with such desire, conjured thoughts of fancy that sent waves of pleasure and anticipation through him.
The princess suddenly moved out of her stupor to tentatively place her tongue on the soft pink flesh that was so very familiar and unfamiliar all at the same time. The smell of her was earthy and sweet, and the taste was imperceptible. Overall, her first impression was that the experience was much like a kiss. The fleshy pink slit reminded her of lips, soft and moist, and the flavor and feel was not dissimilar to the inside of a mouth. She could faintly taste the flavor of her husband, and she recalled with a start that it had been her who had put him there. But alas, she knew her body well, and after a moment or two of getting used to it from this vantage point, she immediately wriggled her tongue up above the slit to where the little pleasure bump resided. She flicked over it expertly with her tongue.
“Hell!” exclaimed her husband in surprise. She did not allow him time to recover, assailing him instead with a steady onslaught of flicks from her tongue, in just the manner that she knew her body liked best. She was well aware that her woman’s body would need continuous stimulation in order to reach satisfaction, so she set out to provide just that. She could feel the body she inhabited becoming aroused again, seemingly of its own accord, and she marveled at the ease with which it functioned. She tried to remain focused on her husband though, hoping to give him the opportunity to see what this experience felt like for a woman.
“It’s as if you’ve done this before,” he murmured.
She realized that this idea probably excited him, and she knew from her own experience that a little bit of fantasy went a long way in helping a woman achieve satisfaction so, in order to help him along, she asked in between licks, “Would you like to see my face buried between a woman’s legs like this?”
“Yes,” he admitted.
“Licking another woman like this?” she asked, twirling her tongue masterfully up and around the pleasure area.
“Yes,” he moaned again, breathing heavily.
“And touching her like this?” she asked, slipping a finger inside as she continued to massage the pleasure spot with the tip of her tongue. He was very close, she knew, but if he lost concentration it could all vanish. Impatience came over her for him to hurry it up and she suddenly realized how odd women must seem to men. Men probably thought women were just being difficult, intentionally prolonging the experience in order to gain control or extra attention when, in fact, they had to work very hard to achieve satisfaction. On the contrary, men seemed to have to work to keep from reaching it. How strange it all was!
“Yes,” her husband was saying. “Yes, yes.”
She worked her tongue vigorously and slipped another finger in. She marveled at how soft the inside of her body felt to a man’s finger. “It might be your tongue I’m using,” she told him, “but it is me doing the licking.”
“Yes,” he moaned.
“It’s me doing the fingering,” she added. She used her lips and tongue as she spoke to keep up the steady prodding.
“Yes.”
“It’s me who is giving your woman’s body pleasure.” She continued in earnest, stimulating her husband’s mind, as well as the body he inhabited. Finally she felt the telltale shudder and she smiled with satisfaction. Now that her task was done she wanted once again to feel that exquisite release from her husband’s body. No wonder men wanted sex all the time when it all happened so easily!
She rose up and slipped inside her woman’s body once more. This time it felt infinitely better, softer and readier, and she even got a few more than three strokes in before her man’s body erupted in delightful pleasure.
“I can’t believe how easy it is for you,” she murmured after.
“I can’t believe how hard it is for you,” he admitted.
She wanted to sleep. “Mmm.”
But he, for reasons he could not fathom, needed something more. He snuggled up against her, wanting to talk or to touch. “Honey…” he grumbled.
“What?” she said with exasperation.
“I just thought we could snuggle,” he said.
“Snuggle?” she asked. Suddenly she sat bolt upright in bed.
“What is it?” he asked.
But she was laughing. “Of course you want to snuggle,” she laughed. “You want to talk, and cuddle and be close, correct?”
“Well…would that be so bad?”
“Yes, actually,” she said. “I’m tired. But seriously, is this how it always feels afterward? I have no desire whatsoever to even kiss you now.”
This time he laughed. “That does sound about right.”
“But we often cuddle together after sex,” she objected.
“Well, yes,” he agreed.
“Do you hate it?” she asked him, mortified.
“No!”
“But you obviously don’t need it,” she said.
He could not lie; she was literally feeling what he felt. “I don’t need it as you need it,” he amended.
“Then why do you do it?” she asked.
“To please you,” he explained.
“Oh, god,” s
he moaned.
“No, wait. Hear me out,” he said. “A man needs to be needed. That fulfills his needs. When you need me to hold you, for example, my doing so serves a need in me to please and comfort you. A man wants to believe he is solving problems. Do you see?”
“Sort of,” she said. “But why don’t you need it?”
“I don’t know that, but I do know that it has nothing to do with my love for you.”
“You know,” she said, musing, “I think this was the best thing that the wizardess could have done for us.”
“I agree,” he said.
“I’m not going to take advantage of you anymore,” she promised.
“I’m not going to take advantage of you, either,” he said.
“Even though the sex is easier I don’t want to be a man,” she said emphatically.
“I don’t want to be a woman.”
“Well, if you’ll be quiet and let us get some sleep, morning will come faster.”
They both laughed before drifting off to sleep.
And needless to say, Princess Femina and her husband faced the rest of their lives together with a new awareness of the other, ending not only the saga of the worn shoes for the princess but also the discontent she had felt about being a woman, wife and mother.
PRINCESS HYGENIA
P RINCESS H YGENIA SWALLOWED THE LAST BITE OF HER LUNCH AND immediately got up to start collecting the dirty dishes into an organized pile.
“That was delicious,” her husband said, rising from the table and taking her into his arms. He leaned closer to kiss her.
“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” she replied, turning her head quickly away to prevent his lips touching hers. “We had better get this mess cleared away before the wizardess comes,” she added to explain her avoidance of his kiss. It seemed that she was always looking for reasons to evade his caresses, even when she craved them. It was all so horribly awkward. And yet, how could she help it? He had just eaten a hearty lunch and the thought of tasting it, second-hand, from his lips nauseated her. But it was always the same, no matter what time of day; there was something she could detect on him that repelled her senses and made it impossible for her to enjoy the taste of him. In fact, she had never tasted him at all; for it seemed to her that he carried with him, at all times, a hint of something else, something musty or, even when he cleansed his teeth—which he did hurriedly and without any real purpose—there still lingered that certain staleness, only now it was mixed with the horrible taste of tooth cleanser. That was almost worse than if he had not bothered at all.
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