* * *
Anna, Gwen and Daisy take the three birds, wiping them with a cloth.
* * *
ANNA (CONT’D): Now, fetch the serving dish.
Which Daisy does. Anna arranges the birds, with bits of parsley and cress covering their wounds.
* * *
ANNA (CONT’D): What’s the matter with that?
DAISY: Are you sure? Shouldn’t we tell?
MRS PATMORE: Certainly not.
Thomas has just arrived with a tray of dirty crockery.
THOMAS: Is the remove ready to go up?
Anna sets the plate of broken birds on the tray.
ANNA: Here we are. Daisy, give him a hand with the vegetables.
DAISY: They’re up in the servery. In the warmer.
Thomas and Daisy leave the others alone.
GWEN: Well, I’m glad I don’t have to eat them.
MRS PATMORE: What the eye don’t see, the heart won’t grieve over.
The three mangled birds are carried along the passage.
43 INT. DINING ROOM. DOWNTON. NIGHT.
The same birds are carved and almost eaten. William clears the plates, one by one. Mary is between Matthew and Sir Anthony, who has Cora on his left and Edith opposite.
STRALLAN: Hmm, there’s no doubt about it. The next few years in farming are going to be about mechanisation. That’s the test and we’re going to have to meet it.
Mary is day-dreaming and so fails to respond.
STRALLAN (CONT’D): Don’t you agree, Lady Mary?
MARY: Yes, of course, Sir Anthony. I’m sure I do.
She leans over to Matthew who is talking to his other side.
MARY (CONT’D): Are we ever going to be allowed to turn?
EDITH: Sir Anthony, it must be so hard to meet the challenge of the future, and yet be fair to your employees.
She has spoken across the table, putting her neighbour out.
STRALLAN: This is the point, precisely. We can’t fight progress, but we must find ways to soften the blow.
EDITH: I should love to see one of the new harvesters, if you would ever let me. We don’t have one here.
STRALLAN: I should be delighted.
During this, Carson has filled their glasses and William has supplied them with pudding plates. William goes out.
44 INT. SERVERY. NIGHT.
Mrs Patmore is there as William comes in. Thomas is waiting while Anna is loading a tray with dirty crockery.
WILLIAM: I hope they find that snuff box. What happens if they don’t?
THOMAS: They’ll organise a search, won’t they? I wouldn’t be Mr Bates. Not for all the tea in China.
ANNA: Wouldn’t you, Thomas? I dare say he feels just the same about you.
But he smirks towards the door and when Anna walks out with her tray, she sees O’Brien hovering there.
ANNA (CONT’D): What’s the matter with you?
O’BRIEN: Nothing.
But she is giggling as she hurries away. Inside the pantry, each footman carries a large meringue on a round tray, complete with spoon and fork. Carson looks round the door.
CARSON: Ready?
Mrs Patmore steps forward with a bowl of sugar and a spoon.
MRS PATMORE: Just a minute.
She sprinkles each pudding liberally.
MRS PATMORE (CONT’D): I don’t like to put it on earlier. It sinks in and spoils the effect.
She steps back and the men walk in.
45 INT. DINING ROOM. DOWNTON. NIGHT.
Thomas and William start at opposite ends, on opposite sides. Thomas serves first Cora, then Strallan. As he takes a spoonful, Cora turns to speak to Strallan, obliging the guests round the table to finish their conversations and turn to their other neighbour, which in a fragmented way they gradually do, some more reluctant than others. Mary turns to Matthew as she helps herself, after Strallan.
MARY: Mama has released me, thank God.*
MATTHEW: Sir Anthony seems nice enough.
MARY: If you want to talk farming and foxes by the hour.
Matthew nods. They’re getting on well and he’s glad.
MATTHEW: I’m rather looking forward to the flower show tomorrow.
MARY: Where Mr Molesley’s roses will turn everybody’s heads. But if you tell Granny I said so, I’ll denounce you as a liar.
MATTHEW: I wouldn’t dare. I’ll leave that to my fearless mother.
She laughs. They are flirting, whether they know it or not.
MARY: How were the cottages?
MATTHEW: They’re coming on wonderfully. I’d love to show you.
During this William and Thomas have reached the end. No one has eaten, but now Cora lifts her fork. Strallan sees his hostess has technically started and takes a forkful.
STRALLAN: Obviously, it’s an act of faith at this stage—Good God!
He has shouted, silencing the table.
STRALLAN (CONT’D): Ugh!
He lifts his napkin and spits his mouthful into it.
ROBERT: What on earth?
At last, Strallan remembers himself.
STRALLAN: I do apologise, Lady Grantham. But I had a mouthful of salt.
CORA: What?
Carefully, she tastes some of the pudding.
CORA (CONT’D): Everyone! Put down your forks! Carson, remove this and bring some fruit, bring cheese, bring anything to take this taste away! Sir Anthony, I am so sorry.
Up and down the table, there are different reactions.
ROBERT: Fains I be Mrs Patmore’s kitchen maid when the news gets out.
SYBIL: Poor girl. We ought to send in a rescue party.
Edith is still making headway with Sir Anthony.
EDITH: You must think us very disorganised.
STRALLAN: Not at all. These things happen.
But the surprising response is that of Mary and Matthew. In the middle of all this, they catch each other’s eye and burst into unstoppable giggles, with Mary clutching Matthew’s arm in her struggle to control herself, and stifling her laughter with her napkin.
46 INT. SERVANTS’ HALL. NIGHT.
By contrast, Mrs Patmore is sobbing into a handkerchief. Thomas and William are not there. The others watch.
ANNA: Come on. It’s not that bad. Nobody’s died.
MRS PATMORE: I don’t understand it! It must have been that Daisy! She’s muddled everything up before now!
DAISY: But I never—
A sign from Carson silences her.
CARSON: Don’t worry, Daisy. You’re not in the line of fire, here.
MRS PATMORE: I know that pudding! I chose it ‘cos I know it!
MRS HUGHES: Which is why you wouldn’t let her ladyship have the pudding she wanted. Because you didn’t know it.
MRS PATMORE: Exactly!
Mrs Hughes glances at Carson. At this, Mrs Patmore suddenly realises she’s made a troubling admission and subsides.
MRS PATMORE (CONT’D): I don’t see how it happened.
She weeps again, as Carson catches Bates’s eye and inclines his head towards the door. Bates nods and stands.
BATES: Come on, everyone. Let’s give Mrs Patmore some space to breathe.
He starts to send them out as he looks at Anna.
BATES (CONT’D): You, too.
ANNA: I don’t think I should leave her.
BATES: Yes, you should. Leave her to Mr Carson. He knows what he’s doing.
They go, and the cook and butler are alone together. Carson kneels and puts some coal on the fire.
MRS PATMORE: Don’t do that. Get William or the hall boy to do it. It’s beneath your dignity.
CARSON: It won’t kill me. Now …
He sits opposite her, on the other side of the fire. After a moment, he takes her hand and pats it.
CARSON (CONT’D): All in your own good time, I think you’ve got something to tell me.
Mrs Patmore looks at him. It’s true. She has.*
47 INT. KITCHEN PASSAGE. NIGHT.
Outside the room, the other s
ervants loiter. Anna makes a sign to Bates. They draw apart.
ANNA (V.O): I think I know where that snuff box is.
BATES: Where?
ANNA: Hidden in your room.
For a moment, he is stunned with disappointment.
BATES: You don’t think—
ANNA: ‘Course I don’t, you silly beggar.
BATES: Then …?
ANNA: I bet Thomas’d like it, if they took you for a thief.
The penny drops.
BATES: Yes. I expect he would.
ANNA: Go upstairs now and find it. And when you have, you can choose whether to put it in Thomas’s room. Or give it to me, and I’ll slip it into Miss O’Brien’s.
BATES: You naughty girl.
ANNA: Fight fire with fire. That’s what my Mum says.
Which makes him smile, even while he is in peril.
END OF ACT TWO
ACT THREE
48 INT. DRAWING ROOM. DOWNTON. NIGHT.
Thomas leads the ladies into the drawing room.
SYBIL: Poor Mrs Patmore. Do you think you should go and see her?
CORA: Tomorrow. She needs time to recover her nerves. I knew there was something going on.
EDITH: It seems hard that poor Sir Anthony had to pay the price.
MARY: Good God!
Mary does an imitation of Strallan which makes Sybil laugh.
EDITH: As for your giggling like a ridiculous schoolgirl with Cousin Matthew! It was pathetic.
MARY: Poor Edith. I am sorry Matthew’s proved a disappointment to you.
EDITH: Who says he has?
MARY: Matthew. He told me. Oh, sorry. Wasn’t I supposed to know?
This is infuriating to Edith, which Cora sees.
CORA: You were very helpful, Edith, looking after Sir Anthony like that. You saved the day.
EDITH: I enjoyed it. We seemed to have a lot to talk about.
She casts a rather superior look at Mary, who makes a face and comes closer as they start to hiss at each other.
MARY: Spare me your boasting, please.
EDITH: Now who’s jealous?
MARY: Jealous? Do you think I couldn’t have that old booby if I wanted him?
EDITH: Even you can’t take every prize.
MARY: Is that a challenge?
EDITH: If you like.
49 INT. SERVANTS’ HALL. NIGHT.
Carson is listening to Mrs Patmore. She is still crying, but she is calmer now, and more tragic for it.
* * *
MRS PATMORE: I’ve known it for a while now. At first, I thought it might pass, you know. Like an headache or an earache. But I know it won’t.
CARSON: And it’s getting worse?
MRS PATMORE: Oh, yes. I could almost manage for a long time. Knowing the kitchen and where everything was kept. Even with that fool girl.
* * *
CARSON: I think you might owe Daisy an apology.
This is a hard one to swallow.
MRS PATMORE: Maybe. I’ve had a lot to put up with, I can tell you.
Carson chooses to ignore this.
CARSON: And you’ve not been to a doctor?
MRS PATMORE: I don’t need a doctor to tell me I’m going blind.*
She looks at him, her eyes filling again.
MRS PATMORE (CONT’D): A blind cook, Mr Carson. What a joke. Whoever heard of such a thing? A blind cook.
She makes to laugh a little at this absurdity. But Carson only takes her hand in both of his, and squeezes it.
50 INT. HALL. DOWNTON. NIGHT.
Robert leads the men out of the dining room.
ROBERT: I hope our salty pudding didn’t spoil the evening for you.
MATTHEW: On the contrary.
ROBERT: I’m glad you and Mary are getting along.
Matthew smiles but does not comment.
ROBERT (CONT’D): There’s no reason why you can’t be friends.
MATTHEW: No. No reason at all.
Something in his tone emboldens Robert.
ROBERT: I don’t suppose there’s any chance that you could sort of … start again?
MATTHEW: Life is full of surprises.
With a laugh, Robert walks through the drawing room doors which have been opened by Thomas, leaving Matthew to follow, side by side, with Strallan and the other guests.
51 INT. DRAWING ROOM. DOWNTON. NIGHT.
Mary and Edith look up as the men enter. With an openly competitive glance at her sister, Edith attempts to catch Strallan’s eye, but Mary sets off. From Matthew’s point of view, he sees Mary coming across the room towards him, with a warm smile.
MARY: I’ve been waiting for you. I’ve found a book on the table over here and I think it’s just the thing to catch your interest.
MATTHEW: Really? I was only—
But she has gone to the side of Sir Anthony Strallan and slipped her arm through his, leading him over to the central table.
MARY: Well, I was looking in the library and I …
Matthew, left stranded, is completely flummoxed. He stops. Edith glances at him and then goes herself to the table, to talk to Sir Anthony.
EDITH: I was very taken by what you were saying over dinner about the way we …
But Strallan is not listening. He is entirely engrossed.
STRALLAN: You’re so right, Lady Mary. How clever you are. This is exactly what we have to be aware of.
As he speaks, Mary glances triumphantly across at her sister, who drops back. Mary turns to Strallan.
Edith joins Matthew, still standing immobile. She is furious.
EDITH: It seems we have both been thrown over for a bigger prize.
Matthew does not answer, but then the clock chimes.
MATTHEW: Heavens, is that the time?
EDITH: You’re not going?
MATTHEW: The truth is my head’s splitting. I don’t want to spoil the party so I’ll slip away. Will you make my excuses to your parents?
He walks towards the door giving a swift order to William to come and let him out. Across the room, Mary looks up and sees Matthew leaving. She realises what she’s done.
MARY: Excuse me Sir Anthony.
Mary follows Matthew out of the room, all of which is observed by Robert.
52 INT. HALL. DOWNTON. NIGHT.
Mary arrives just as William is shutting the main door.
MARY: Has Mr Crawley left?
WILLIAM: Yes, m’lady.
MARY: But what about the car? Branson can’t have brought it round so quickly.
WILLIAM: He said he’d rather walk, m’lady.
* * *
MARY: It’s very windy.
WILLIAM: He mentioned he had a headache. That the wind would blow it away.
* * *
MARY: Thank you.
William gives a slight bow and returns to the drawing room. Mary hovers, glancing out of the window at the receding figure. The truth is, she doesn’t know what she wants.
53 INT. DRAWING ROOM. DOWNTON. NIGHT.
ROBERT: Mary can be such a child.
CORA: What do you mean, darling?
ROBERT: She thinks if you put a toy down, it’ll still be sitting there when you want to play with it again.
CORA: What are you talking about?
ROBERT: Never mind.
He reaches down and strokes her cheek, which pleases her.
54 INT. SERVANTS’ HALL. NIGHT.
They are all in there when Carson walks by.
ANNA: Mr Carson?
He stops and comes to the door.
ANNA (CONT’D): We were wondering about that snuff box. Has it turned up yet?
CARSON: I’m afraid not.
Thomas and O’Brien share a smirking glance. But they do not see the look that Anna gives Bates.
BATES: Well, I think we should have a search.
THOMAS: What?
BATES: It doesn’t do to leave these things too long.
ANNA: Mr Carson can search the men’s rooms and Mrs Hughes the women’s.
ANNA (CONT’D): And it should be right away, now we’ve talked of it. So no one has a chance to hide the box. Don’t you agree, Mr Carson?
CARSON: Well … perhaps it’s for best. Although I’m sure I won’t find anything. I’ll fetch Mrs Hughes.
He walks out of the room and the others stare at each other. Then Thomas stands, followed by O’Brien.
THOMAS: I think I’ll just …
O’BRIEN: I’d better check it’s tidy.
They hurry out. Leaving Bates and Anna laughing to the bewilderment of the rest of the staff.
55 INT. BACK STAIRS. NIGHT.
Thomas and O’Brien race upstairs.
THOMAS: The bastard’s hidden it in my room or yours.
O’BRIEN: Why did I ever listen to you in the first place?
Which seems unjust.
56 INT. MAIDS’ PASSAGE. NIGHT.
Mrs Hughes emerges from Gwen’s and Anna’s room. They stand in the doorway watching as she progresses to the next.
MRS HUGHES: Miss O’Brien?
She pushes open the door to find the room in complete chaos. O’Brien stands in the middle of a stripped bed, with boxes and drawers and clothes all over the place.
MRS HUGHES (CONT’D): My, my. You have been busy.
57 INT. HALL. CRAWLEY HOUSE. NIGHT.
Matthew takes off his coat. Isobel comes out of a door.
ISOBEL: I was expecting you later than this. I’ll tell Molesley to lock up.
MATTHEW: Thanks. Goodnight, Mother.
He kisses her and starts up the stairs.
ISOBEL: How was the evening? Did you enjoy yourself?
MATTHEW: Quite. The thing is, for a moment I thought—
He stops, smiling down at his mother who looks up at him.
MATTHEW (CONT’D): Never mind what I thought. I was wrong. Goodnight.
Downton Abbey Script Book Season 1 Page 23
