He crossed his arms and scoffed, looking very much like a stubborn three-year-old. “Like I'm going to teach you.”
My body faltered. That one stung. I doubt he knew how much, but it didn't matter now.
My body stilled. “Fine,” I said calmly. “I’ll just get Holdan to show me.”
His return expression was hard and cold. I doubted I even touched a nerve. It only made me angrier.
Then, in perfect unison, we both pushed off from the table. I started walking towards the doorway. To my surprise, and great annoyance, he was next to me in seconds. My brow furrowed when I remembered it was the only exit.
“Couldn't you have waited a few seconds for me to go?” I asked exasperatedly.
“Why should I have to wait? I've been here longer.”
I rolled my eyes. “Why doesn't that attitude surprise me.”
We hit the doorway at the same time. I managed to slip in ahead of him, but he knew where he was going better and took off immediately towards the right . . . the way I needed to go, in fact the only way I knew to lead anywhere. Still, I marched off just as purposefully to the left. And, without a single glance back, turned into the small passage.
~ ~ ~
Chapter 9
Naive
AFTER A FEW unfamiliar corridors the anger was still roiling inside of me. At this point about fifty percent of it was directed at Jaden, the other at myself. I knew I should appreciate it while I could, because soon it would be about ninety/ten with me on the faulty side.
I turned down another hall. Really none of it was my fault, as soon as I'd seen him I'd warned him not to push me today. My face flushed freshly hot with a mix of anger and embarrassment. I was squeezing my hand into a tight fist when I realized someone was coming down the hall in the opposite direction. I glanced over once, then cut my eyes downward. Whoever it was had their head buried in a book, walking very slowly. Hopefully too preoccupied to notice me.
Slowing down just enough so he wouldn't be alerted, I spared one more glance as I was about to pass him. This one stopped me.
“Ikovos?” I mumbled.
He looked up, stopping instantly. It was definitely him. The clothes were the same, the hair was the same, the face was the same . . . but the glasses?
He smiled. “Oh, hi, Evelyn.”
I cleared my throat. My responding hi came out fumbled.
With open book still resting in one hand his eyebrows scrunched. “What are you doing here?”
As I tried to blink my mind clear of the bespectacled boy so that I could answer his question, the reason I was ‘back here’ came pouring into my head. My jaw tightened. I couldn't even force a smile as I answered. “Just looking around,” I said.
He smiled. “Well, were you lost? . . . Because you look a little flustered.”
I didn't have to feel how hot my face was at this point. I shook my head strictly. “Oh, no. That's from something else.”
He cocked his head waiting and I was instantly angry at myself for the small allowance.
“Fever,” I explained.
He looked perplexed, but then his eyes widened. “Oh, that's why you never came to dinner then?”
I suddenly remembered standing him up last night, but, furious or not, I couldn't bring myself to lie about it. “No. . . .” I made an innocent face. “I sort of fell asleep.”
“Oh.” He considered it. “Well, that's probably good if you're feeling sick.”
With undo ferocity I nodded in agreement. “So, what are you doing?” I asked.
He closed the book then and gestured down the hall. “Actually I was about to go pack some food and try to run into you for lunch.”
“Pack?” I questioned.
“Yeah, that's why I wanted to see you. I'm on guard duty tonight so I'm gonna be gone till tomorrow.”
On a normal day, I could smile, wish him a good time, then mope inwardly once he left. But I wasn't feeling normal today. I was feeling like I didn't want to stay in the same building as meanie all night.
“Oh, cool, I'll go with you then.”
He laughed once then looked back to see my still straight face. “Wait, you're serious?” I tried to hold the face. “Wow. When you're not being ridiculously shy, you're kind of presumptuous.”
I allowed a wince, but my resolve to go with him was clouding out all fears of inconveniencing and rejection that I would normally be feeling.
He grinned in a way that, if I did have any buried fears, they dissipated. “Well, of course I'd love you to come. But . . . I'm not sure what the Master's would say. . . .”
“Oh . . . , I replied, straightening slightly. Somehow the mention, mixed with the glasses . . . it just made him look different, older? Not that that should matter. . . .
I shook my head clear, visibly, unlike my usual imperceptible nod. At this point Ikovos must have thought I'd lost it. The look on his face matched this assumption.
“We can ask them though,” he clarified, eyeing me worriedly.
I smiled now, trying to relieve his concern. “That would be great.”
He nodded repeatedly, like I needed reassuring.
“Okay, well, let's go grab some food first, then we can go find them.”
He gestured to move ahead, but my body froze. I did not want to go back that way, any way that meant going closer to Jaden.
“Actually I just finished eating. Why don't I go talk to Cornelius while you get lunch?”
He considered this, and for a moment I thought he was going to adjust his glasses, he hadn't thus far, but his hand went on further to scratch the back of his head. “I guess that works,” he said. “Are you sure though? The Masters can be a little scary when discussing certain topics.”
I gulped at the prospect of Thoran, but Cornelius would be okay.
I nodded and he raised an eyebrow. “Well, you're braver than me,” he said. I gave him a thanks-a-lot face and his grin grew as he threw an arm down the hall. “I just saw him a minute ago. Just go right into the next corridor, then left, and it should be on the fourth door on your right.”
I looked off. “Right, left, right.”
He nodded.
“Okay, then. . . .” I was unsure at this stage how to do the goodbye thing. Hug? Handshake? The numerous options had me growing in insecurity as the seconds of staring at each other ticked by. Eventually I just walked off, cursing myself when I had to turn back. “Wait, Ikovos?”
He was standing in the same spot. “Yes?”
“Where should I meet you? After I'm done.”
He smiled and shook his head. “Just head back to the study. We'll leave from there.”
I nodded, a little confused by the manner of his reaction. “Okay. Bye.” I said, then walked off quickly. After turning right into the next corridor, I paused.
The morning, thus far, had been much too full of a high level and wide variety of emotions. Excitement, rage, shock . . . too many to name. I rubbed a hand over my face. Is it always going to be like this?
Not tonight, I thought. Tonight would, or, rather, if I was lucky, could, be a small break. Just me and Ikovos. I frowned. I don't know if that would be much of a break from the emotional stuff, but at least the variety would be lessened.
With fresh determination to spend the evening out. I marched down the hall, turned left, then counted, one, two, three, fou— was it four or five? I took a brave breath and peaked around the corner into the fourth room.
At first I was happy to see Cornelius sitting inside. But then I saw the other people, and then they all saw me . . . then I wasn't so happy anymore.
Clearing my throat I straightened into the doorway with a smile and a wave. “Hi,” I said.
They all stared back. Cornelius in sweet surprise. Sophie with soft patience. And Thoran . . . Thoran with a dark, incredulous, questioning, glare.
All this vanished into smiles in a matter of seconds, with Cornelius beginning the chain. “Oh. Hello, my dear.”
I smiled again
. . . and waved again . . . then I was at a loss. Why did I come here again?
Thoran interrupted the question. “Well, don't by timid, girl. Come in.”
Sophie slapped his leg and Cornelius eyed him, but I was quicker than them both, swiftly obeying his command to enter. Past the small circle of chairs and couches they were sitting in, the room opened up into a cozy, well-decorated, den-like area. A fireplace blazed in the far wall, green of course. There was one average-sized window, and I think in the whole lodge I hadn't seen as many adornments as the number that occupied this room: paintings, oil lamps, tapestries, statues.
Some quiet muttering brought me back to the three adults. Thoran was eyeing the other two placidly. Then he looked to me calmly.
“How was your morning?” Cornelius interrupted with a smile.
I tried to mirror him. “Good . . . and you? Or, you guys?”
Sophie answered first. “Good.”
Thoran nodded.
Cornelius echoed the first reply.
Before the awkward silence could overtake the room, Sophie raised a hand. “Oh, I have to tell you. . . .” I raised my eyebrows and smiled, trying to look attentive as possible. “I'm not going to be leaving tonight after all, so I don't need you to set out the food.”
I nodded. “Oh. Okay.” Until then I had forgotten about helping out tonight, it was good she said something first, because I would have felt horrible if I'd asked to leave without mentioning that.
Oh right, leaving. That's why I'm here.
With what seemed like unnaturally acute timing, Thoran looked at me and asked, “So is there something we can help you with?” His voice was softer now, lighter. In fact I noticed that his entire appearance seemed more polished than it had since I'd met him. His hair was combed, his clothes matching. Hands clean, even the scruff covering his face appeared trimmed.
I took a breath before answering. “Actually I wanted to . . . well, I was really just going to ask Cornelius, but . . . ,” my gaze wandered a bit, “Ikovos was going to the gate tonight and I thought, I thought it would be a good chance for me to see what it's like so that I could do it in the future, if you needed. So, I wanted to see if I could—” I looked back at him, and his stare, in fact the entire situation, reminded me of someone else “—do that.” My finish was unnecessarily emphasized. They didn't seem to notice though, even as my jaw clenched into determination.
Thoran looked over at Cornelius. When my eyes fell on Sophie she smiled sweetly, but gave no response. Obviously it was not her decision.
My fingers twisted between each other as I waited.
Finally Thoran turned back, smiling warmly. “That sounds like a fine plan.”
My breath released and I took a step towards the door. He stopped me.
“Just make sure to keep what we talked about in mind, alright?”
Inwardly my eyes went wide, but I think outwardly I kept it together. “Yes, of course. Definitely.”
He smirked then, as did Cornelius and Sophie.
“Well,” I said, stepping back, “I'll let you guys get back to it.” They all nodded as I inched further. “Thanks again, Thor, err . . . Master Thoran.” With that I backed as quickly as I could out the room.
I might have spent the walk to the study trying to sort out some aspects of my buzzing mind. Unfortunately, my thoughts were kept busy trying to find the correct route.
Though I would have bet money there was a quicker way back, I grudgingly took the route past the cafeteria, not stopping to glance around once until I was back in the study. There I walked over to the couch, plopped down, and told myself to relax.
It might have worked if I hadn't opened my eyes to see brilliant, orange, flames on the table ahead of me. I narrowed my eyes at if for a moment, then stood up and looked around the room. When I saw a small, tin crate I picked it up and duly dropped it over the small fire on the table. With that I stood up straight and crossed my arms proudly.
Wait, it can't get any oxygen like that. . . . Do magic fires need oxygen?
I chewed nervously on a fingernail for not even two seconds before racing down and lifting a corner to check beneath. It was fine of course, blazing brightly. I set the edge back down and rolled my eyes thoroughly at myself.
Okay, Evelyn, change your clothes. Pack what you need. Before I did either of these things I ended up setting a book under one edge of the crate, just in case the no oxygen thing eventually became a problem.
Now I was left staring at my contraption, freshly changed, hair clipped back, small pack of overnight necessities resting beside me. I strummed a finger against my leg a few times, then the table, then I leaned down to peak under the box to make sure the flame was alright. Constant as always. I let out a sigh that flicked it slightly when I heard a knock at the door.
I leaned straight instantly. “Come in,” I said, clearing my throat.
He did. It was Ikovos, carrying a good-sized pack and, thank goodness, with no glasses anywhere in sight. He grinned and I returned the gesture, excitement setting in with the promise of a relaxing night.
“Did you have any luck with Cornelius?” he asked.
I shook my head. “No. I had some with Cornelius, Sophie, and Thoran though.”
He winced. “That sounds like fun. . . .”
I waved a carefree hand. “It wasn't so bad . . . you're definitely right about Sophie by the way.”
He cocked his head. “What about her?”
“You don't remember . . . ?”
He was drawing a blank.
“The first day I got here you told me you thought she was involved with more than just cooking and cleaning. . . .”
He nodded. “Oh, yeah, yeah. . . . Wow, you remembered that?”
I gave him half a smile. “At that point it wasn't every day I had a non-related boy talking to me about anything.”
He leaned to one side. “But now you have them by the dozens . . . it's a wonder you hear anything I say.”
I shook my head, releasing the coy semblance. “Don't worry, you sort of stand out.”
We both smiled for a moment then he moved forward with a skeptical look on his face. “Ah . . . Evelyn?”
“Yes?” I replied pleasantly.
He pointed to his left. “Why is there a crate over the fire?”
I looked at the table and my eyes widened. “Oh! Umm . . . it was bright last night, so I just . . . covered it up.”
“Ah,” he said, pursing his lips. “You should tell Jaden about that, just ask him to chill out when it gets dark.”
Faced plainly with the fact that Jaden directly controlled my daily light source was a little odd. It wasn't really something I'd considered, and definitely not one I wanted to now.
“That's alright,” I said, touching a finger to the box. “This works fine.”
He made one more dubious look at the contraption then shrugged. “Well, are you ready to get out of here then?”
I jumped up, brightening immediately. “Most definitely.”
He adjusted his pack. “And the Master's gave their all clear, right?”
I nodded, picking my pack up simultaneously.
As he opened the door for me he shook his head. “I don't know how you do that.”
I laughed shortly as I walked through the door ahead of him.
For the rest of the trek out the lodge I tried to convince him that I really didn't do anything, and they had just said yes right away, but he wouldn't believe me.
His head went back and forth once again as we ambled along the path. “You're not going to convince me. There’s too much about yourself that you don't see.”
I shook my head. On this subject I had little trouble with certainty. “That's a bold claim for someone who's only known me for a week.”
He put up a finger. “No, it's just a sign that you're really missing something if someone that's only been around you a handful of times can see it.”
I narrowed my eyes. His point wasn't very arguable. But r
eally I was okay with letting it go. I was walking proof of the truth. You wouldn't need to argue with someone that was trying to tell you the sky was green, just look up and the truth of it is evident.
“Whatever, Ikovos,” I sighed.
He stuck out an accusing finger. “Aha. Gotcha! And you know what else you don't see . . .” Okay, now this is a problem. When you let the guy that thinks the sky is green think he's right, so he decides he can share his other opinions with you. “—Why are you always complaining that you're hair isn't nice?” Alright. Wasn’t expecting that . . . “I've seen people with bad hair, and I've been waiting six days now for things to take a turn for the worst. But every morning it's looked fine.”
Surprised as I was by the strange topic, the flaw in reason was too off to ignore. I scoffed. “You're just being ridiculous now. Everyone knows I have crazy hair, everyone has always said that I have crazy hair.”
Our speed quickened as we continued through a clearer area.
“Oh, right,” he snorted sarcastically, “those perfectly sane people in Tiver. I'd trust their opinion.”
I furrowed. “Not just them!”
He eyed me. “Who else then?”
I looked ahead. I'm sure if I had been anywhere besides Tiver my entire life I would have been teeming with examples.
My finger popped up suddenly, and with an ‘aha!’ quality I declared proudly: “Jaded did.”
Ikovos slowed, looking at me curiously. I was immediately sorry for the mention. “Jaden told you that you had bad hair?”
I shook my head quickly. “No . . . ,” I hoped that would be the end of it, from Ikovos’s perplexed face I knew it wouldn't, “. . . he just said it was crazy. . . .”
I couldn't keep out the tinge of insecurity, but tried to lighten things with a smile. Ikovos wasn't lightening.
“When did he say this to you?”
I waved my hands exaggeratedly, trying to shake off the whole issue. “It really doesn't matter. Let's talk about something else.”
He looked ahead, straightening. “Fine . . . I'll just ask him about it.”
My eyes widened and I stopped completely. “Ikovos, you can't!”
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