I'd set Tanis down in front of the deep pool, rubbing my shoulders and glancing around the forest.
Because of the wind it was pretty loud, noises every direction. I wanted Tanis to hurry because now that I was away from Ikovos the irrational fears of my nightmare were beginning to take root. Unfortunately after a few sips Tanis jumped head-long into the spring, swimming about playfully. He looked like a mini sea otter.
I smiled at it, but tried to urge him out. “Okay, come on Tanis. We gotta get back.”
He just ducked further until I furrowed.
“Alright, two minutes.”
The wind flared up again and I looked out ahead. Then I rubbed my arms and stood up, turning around to stretch my legs a bit.
As soon as I did a body hit me.
It took me a second to realize who it was, but the scent . . . I didn't realize he had such a particular smell. It was rich, spicy, and it made my skin flush even before I consciously recognized it.
My head was pulled to his neck and his arms wrapped securely around my body, fingers barely grazing my lower back.
“Don't ever do that again,” said Jaden. His hold tightened as he did, breath hitting my ear and causing a significant shudder.
I could barely retain a gasp of emotion.
“What are you doing here?”
I knew I should pull back, but the idea of letting him go now, when I’d thought I’d never see him again. I moaned, just slightly, then buried my face a little deeper into his neck. Neither were intentional.
He didn’t back away. He only gripped me harder.
“That's a really stupid question.” His lips were closer, another shiver ran down my neck and through to the base of my spine.
Please. Don’t do this to me, Jaden.
I stiffened and pushed away from him till there was a good foot between us. Bad idea, now I could see his eyes. His eyes were worse, much worse.
“It's not a stupid question,” I forced, defensively.”How did you find out?”
This was good. Back away, no more touching, no more feeling.
“Does it matter?” he asked, darkening, as if he were hurt. “I can't believe you didn't tell me.”
“You wouldn't have let me go,” I pointed out.
“With you I never seem to have much say in the matter, anyways,” he scoffed, throwing out a hand. I couldn't tell whether he was kidding, or honestly irritated by the fact.
My chest lifted. It was getting cold again.
“So you're not going to make me go back?” I asked it carefully, moving backwards again and a bit to the right so I wouldn't end up falling into the pond.
He spread his arms out. “Does it look like I am?”
He was definitely irritated by this fact. More so than made sense me to me. I mean, I know Ikovos said he would be angry, but if he wasn't making us go back . . . what did he have to be mad about? My brow knit with another confused thought.
“Why are you here then?”
“What are you talking about?” he asked, narrowing immediately. His face was incredulous, bewildered even.
My eyes tightened. What was I talking about? He was the one not making sense.
“I just don't understand,” I started. “It's a two day trip, and you've, you've got the patrols and the fighting. I know that there are attacks all the time, things won’t be as safe if you're not there . . . I just don’t understand why you came all this way.”
A good argument, I was making perfect sense.
“You think any of that matters in comparison?” he countered. Brows lifting above smoldering eyes.
My body rushed just at the way he said it, at the way he was looking at me. I swallowed hard, backing up till my feet hit the wall, hands flattening against it. “Compar—” I gulped “—comparison to what?”
He was five feet away. He hadn't moved forward since I'd begun backing up. He stood rigid and his eyes were slanted at me, shrouded as usual beneath the dark layers. They tightened just a fraction, as if they were searching my face for some missing piece of information.
“Are you really this dense?” he asked.
My head shook slightly, not-conceiving, hands still braced against the rock.
His gaze set fiercely, and he started moving towards me. I tried to form a question as to what he was doing. Soon he was so close I had to close my eyes.
And then kissed me.
My chest hurt and my blood rushed. I know my brow must have been dipping substantially in confusion.
Just when I thought I might die, he pressed even harder, wrapping one hand behind my back and pulling me against him. I couldn’t help but sink into it this time, tingling all over, my toes doing an uncontrollable pointy thing.
When he finally released I still had my eyes closed. I could feel his heart pounding heavily past mine, which was a feat. Somehow my hand gotten up to his chest though.
“Do you understand why I came now?” The voice made my head swim. Clear and uninhibited. I knew I wouldn’t survive opening my eyes.
My head bobbed. “Mm-hmm.” Then shook because this still didn't feel possible to me. “Mnm-mm . . .” My fingers were absently tracing the grooves beneath his shirt.
I felt the breath of a smile then, maybe at the fact that I still hadn't opened my eyes.
“Need more convincing?” he asked wryly.
All I got out was a prohibiting moan. I wouldn't survive more convincing.
He laughed slightly again. “Well, if you just keep standing there with your eyes closed like that I'm not going to be able to resist myself.”
The knots in my stomach tightened further.
Oh, dear, goodness. This isn’t happening.
I tried to take a breath, then ducked my head back a bit and looked up fuzzily.
He was smirking, one brow raised. But his eyes. . . . I was sure they were the same ones that I was constantly trying to steal a glance at . . . but the way they were resting on me now made it hard to believe.
I stifled another gasp with a bite to my lip. This was followed by an immeasurable pause.
“Umm . . . did you just?”
“Kiss you.” he finished.
I swallowed, lifting my free hand with a pointed finger. “Because . . .”
“I love you,” he clarified, matter-of-factly.
Another shivering breath escaped me. “Oh . . .” Black spots blurred my vision. I pursed my lips, brow furrowed, gaze fixed to his chest. I would have thought that this would feel like a dream, but it didn't, not with him so close.
My eyes turned back up to him. “Aren't you going to ask me how I feel?”
His lips tightened immediately, as if he were trying very hard to hold back a smile. “I hate to tell you this honey, but you’re a little obvious.”
Honey, he called me honey. My eyes lulled with uncontrollable delight. Then I blinked them clear.
“Obvious?”
“Well, I’m also very perceptive if that makes you feel better,” he allowed, mouth tipping. Then he brought a finger up to my face, tracing my bottom lip.
I could hardly breathe.
“You’re perfect at everything,” I managed.
He laughed at this, then continued with his finger till my skin, head to toe, was covered in goose bumps.
“You can’t keep doing that,” I breathed, reaching a hand up to stop him.
He simply readjusted his position unfazed, lacing his fingers through mine. “Okay.” Then he smiled again, warmer this time.
I should have been wondering why he was . . . in love with me, but . . . Wait, why wasn’t I wondering that?
I braved meeting his eyes. “I don’t understand. . . .”
“What’s that?” he asked, moving his gaze to my hand.
“Well . . .” I swallowed. “What. Why. How. When? . . . Why?”
He looked back at me with a smirk. “Umm—”
“You’re so much better than me.”
“Not in my opinion.”
“That
doesn’t mean it isn’t true.”
“It might as well.”
“No, it doesn—” my brows knit “—wait, maybe it does. . . .”
He laughed heartily.
“You never talk to me,” I presented.
He smiled, amused, but curious. “What does that have to do with anything?”
“Well, when you lo . . . when you like someone, shouldn’t you talk to them a lot?”
“It’s love. And, no, not necessarily.”
I furrowed, attempting to ignore the way his fingers were shifting around mine. “You’re sort of mean to me.”
He smiled, then swiveled his eyes around in consideration. “. . . Yeah . . . what’s your point?”
“What?”
“You lost me, baby.”
Baby. I moaned. Oh, that was unfair, now I’ve completely lost my train of thought. I knew there were more reasons. . . .
There was a long pause in which he waited patiently.
“I drive you crazy.” I pointed out, freshly confused.
He raised a devilish brow, then tightened his grip on my back. “Well, obviously.”
“Jaden.”
“If you insist on being stupid, I’m going to go with the ‘more convincing’ idea.”
I met his eyes hard then. And what I saw stopped me solid.
It didn’t matter how little sense it made that he could possibly be in love with me. With the way he was looking at me it was undeniable. He just . . . was.
I suddenly felt deeply angry with him.
“You took too long,” I said, brow narrowed lamely.
He laughed. “Well, we sort of got interrupted. . . . Plus, I didn’t think you didn’t know.” He brought my hand up to his lips. I could feel his warm breath, nice against the cold.
“I’m dense remember.”
He smiled, then kissed it. “I’ll try to be more transparent in the future.”
Somehow I didn’t see that happening . . . I nodded anyways, biting into my lip.
Then it got quiet and he lifted his brows like he just might kiss me again. Before he could, a wet ball of fur hopped onto his shoulder, causing him to back up and release my body.
Tanis squeaked twice and Jaden eyed him derisively. Then I reached for him with a short laugh. He was soaked and must have been very cold. I enclosed him in my hands, holding him tight against my stomach to warm him.
“Thanks a lot,” said Jaden.
I checked back up at the boy. He was giving Tanis a resentful expression. I pursed my lips, then lifted the little guy up, making a small hole and peeking inside.
“He’s cold,” I defended.
“He sabotaged me,” countered Jaden, features narrowed.
I smiled, meeting his eyes till he gave me look that made my blood quicken. Then I searched around, lightening, aware once more of my surroundings. The trees, the wind, the silver sky . . . it all looked different though, very, very different.
“Uh-oh,” I said, halting in my excitement. I’d just remembered something.
“What?” asked Jaden. I noticed now that he was wearing an all black outfit. Dark leather pants. Dark cloth shirt. Leather jacket over that.
“Ikovos,” I explained, turning towards the path. “I told him I’d be right back, he’s gonna be—”
“I already ran into him,” said Jaden. “He knows I’m with you.”
I settled. “Oh. . . .”
He was smirking.
“Did you kill him?”
His brow furrowed. “Would have. . . . I was a little preoccupied.” He looked at me in that way again, and my knees got all shaky. We had moved away from the rock. I was closer to the path.
“I guess I’m not in trouble any more, right?” I asked it with a sugary-sweet smile. He was narrowed at first, then it disappeared completely with a head shake.
He laughed. “That’s so wrong.”
Tanis wiggled in my grasp. I tried to maintain my innocence by tightening my lips against a smile. Then a shiver took me, cold wind flaring up. He didn’t miss a beat, stepping forward and wrapping his arm around my body. We started walking.
I thought of all the things I’d like to say or ask, like how long he’d felt this way, why in the world he did, what was going to happen now, oh, that was the big one. But we were going to run into Ikovos any second and I already didn’t know how I was going to handle the situation.
When I saw him up ahead, I pointed a loose finger and looked over to Jaden. The dazzlingly gorgeous boy, that had all the more affect at such a close proximity, simply smirked knowingly, leaned down to kiss the top of my head, then released his arm, putting a slight space between us.
My skin felt hot. He could have left off the head kissing part.
I didn’t have time to compose myself before Ikovos looked towards us. He eyed me, then Jaden. We both walked up slowly, me going to lean back against the rock Ikovos was sitting on. Jaden sat across from us.
I cleared my throat, continuing to stroke Tanis, then turned up.
Ikovos grinned immediately at my face.
“Jeez, what’d you do to her, Jaden?” he asked, looking to the dark-haired boy.
I blushed. Jaden sent rock flying at his head. He ducked it easily, lips drawn and looking to me.
“And he's not even angry anymore.”
That's why he just threw a rock at you? But when I checked over, a smile was leaking through the obviously forced glare. It made me warm thoroughly.
“I should be.”
“Hey, I didn't know you were back,” defended Ikovos, meeting his eyes then gesturing over. “She's the one that lied.”
“Traitor!” I yelled, disbelievingly.
His face scrunched, head shaking. “Not really, he won't get mad at you.”
I flushed again, eyes dropping. Then I looked over at Jaden. He was shaking his head down and chuckling softly.
I guess Ikovos was right. I looked at the light-haired boy and he pointed haughtily. My eyes narrowed once, then I walked over to grab my jacket.
“Whatever, doesn't matter,” said Jaden in a rush. “What exactly is it that you guys are doing here?”
I slipped Tanis into the inner pocket, then shrugged it on. My skin was all tingly and numb from the recent ordeal.
“You didn't know before you came?” asked Ikovos.
I turned back in time to see Jaden crossing his arms.
“I heard about it,” he said. “It just doesn't make any sense to me.” Then his gaze moved over to me, lingeringly.
I cleared my throat and headed back.
“How did you know where to come anyways?” asked Ikovos.
“Master Thoran.” Jaden shrugged.
Both of us shot up instantly.
“He knew?” I questioned.
Jaden just smirked at me.
“He told you?” added Ikovos incredulously.
“Getting information works better when you don't have obvious intentions of using it to disobey the person,” said Jaden, tilting his head.
Ikovos lifting his brows in realization. “Then he let you come?” It was more of a statement.
“He knew I would go after you guys anyways.”
I hummed with a thrill at the words. I knew they were talking, and I knew this was all important stuff. But all I could focus on for any surmount of time was that the picturesque boy sitting on the rock five feet away had just told me he loved me.
Had he? . . . I wasn’t dreaming it up was I? . . .
Ikovos shrugged. “He should have known we would have either way too.”
“I think he did . . . ,” said Jaden, face fixed off in thought. Then it turned grim and he looked at me.
We were all quiet until Ikovos leaned forward. “He did talk about the Gaeln with me there . . . he could be torn between what's best for the order and what's safe for . . .”
He stopped.
Then Jaden hopped up, confidently. “That's why I'm here. Nothing stands a chance against three artisans.”
<
br /> I narrowed down. Ikovos exhaled knowingly.
“What?” asked Jaden.
Ikovos took a breath. “She hasn't been able to do anything since the attacks.”
I frowned, but when I looked up Jaden's mouth was tipped ruefully.
“Well, I can fix that up,” he said, then he walked towards me.
I warmed at just the thought of it. If this actually worked though, I was going to have to admit to the fact that I was completely dependent on him for everything.
A loud strike of thunder interrupted him. We all looked up.
“We may want to try and reach the summit before this gets any worse,” noted Ikovos.
“How much further is it?” asked Jaden.
Good thing Ikovos climbed that tree. The wind blew up fiercely.
“Twenty minutes,” answered Ikovos.
Jaden nodded. Then the other boy hopped off the rock, going to grab the packs. I held Jaden's eyes for a moment, then went to grab my own bag. He stopped me, stepping forward and grabbing my hand.
Okay. I hadn’t dreamt it.
“Don't be brave,” he said, tone serious.
My stomach twisted. “That's interesting advice.”
He gave me a “you-know-what-I-mean” look . . . And I did. Then he lifted my hands up to kiss them and went to help Ikovos get the bags.
My breath shook as the thunder rumbled again. I straightened up.
Twenty minutes . . . then all of this would be over, everyone would be safe. Just twenty minutes.
~ ~ ~
Chapter 20
Sacrifice
THE STORM WORSENED as we made our way to the top. My mind was scattered. The Gaeln, the mission, the boys back home, and Jaden. . . . He stayed close as we walked up to the top. I started to remember my dream at one point and I wished I had told him about it. Though just the memory of him socking Sylvanus made me feel safer. I also wished that he had gotten to help me conjure a flame, but we were in too much of a rush . . . there would be time for that later.
The sky was darker with clouds when we reached the top. The scene was breathtaking. As soon as the trees broke, the ground leveled out to a peak of flat, smooth, rock - with not so much as a plant across it. It was higher than any of the surrounding mountains, maybe a hundred feet in diameter.
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