I try pushing against the cloud but when my mind touches it, I feel intense anger. That anger seeps through my mind, and all the fears and aggravation I have escape. The two threads that were untied entwine around the black and golden knot. The threads don’t knot back up but they don’t stand alone anymore.
I almost had it. I was halfway there. I jump to my feet and scream. “Dammit!” I throw a couple of sea shells out into the water, releasing my anger.
“Everything okay?” Coy’s voice carries through the night as he walks toward me. I tense up even more. I half expected someone would probably come see what all the commotion was about. I just didn’t consider it might be him.
“No,” my voice is barely a whisper as defeat claims me. What was keeping me from unraveling those last two strands? It has to be the darkness that was mingled with them but what was it?
Coy wraps his hands around my waist, resting his chin on my shoulder. “What happened?”
I close my eyes, “The Elders think that I can match Cerelia’s power if I can balance my power. The problem is that I can’t.”
“Why not?” His voice is a soft whisper next to my ear.
I try feeling comfort in his embrace but there’s nothing.
“I don’t know. There’s something blocking me. I’m going to have to figure out what it is. Maybe the Elders or Danika will know.” I try to extract myself from his embrace but he only grabs me tighter and tries to turn me toward him. “Coy, don’t,” I say, as I shrug him off.
“Baby, it’s going to be okay?” I turn and look at him. Did he really just call me ‘baby’? My heart breaks at how hard he’s trying. I guess it’s time to break his heart too.
“No, it’s not.” Sighing, I continue, “Coy we need to talk. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and after talking with Natahala, I think it’s best if we quit pretending to be in this…relationship.” I hold my breath as I wait for him to answer me.
Coy takes a step back stunned, “Pretending? Who the hell’s been pretending, Racquel? I sure haven’t. I’ve been trying.”
“That’s the point. I may not have much experience, but we aren’t supposed to be trying this early in a relationship.” My eyes start to sting from the tears building up. I never wanted to hurt him, never.
“Our relationship’s different, it’s more complicated. I’m human, you’re a Shadow being, of course it’s going to be hard.” He tries reaching out for me but I take a step back, shaking my head. Coy drops his hands down to his side, defeated. “You said you talked to Natahala?”
I nod my head.
“Please, tell me all about what the heartless, soulless, Queen of the Damned, had to say about our relationship?” Tears start to build in Coy’s eyes, making them gleam in the moon light.
I have to make him understand what’s going on. “Did you know that when a Vampire feeds they can feel their prey’s emotions if they don’t block them off?” I’m sure he doesn’t since it seems that most Vampires turn their feelings off.
“I never felt anything like what we had with those monsters.”
“That’s what I’m saying. That’s because they were blocking the feelings. I didn’t know that either. Natahala said that simple emotions can be intensified. They can become distorted into something they’re not.” I want to reach out to Coy but that would only make this worse.
“So you’re telling me that what I feel for you isn’t real?” Anger gleams in Coy’s eyes. He steps toward me, grabbing me by the arms. “What I felt for you and still feel for you is real and I’m not going to let some heartless creature interfere with that.” He tries pulling me in for a kiss but I slip from his grasp.
“This isn’t just because of what Natahala said.” I keep backing away from Coy as tears brim in my eyes. “I’m sorry, I never wanted to hurt you but we can’t do this anymore.”
“Why? You can’t just end this without giving me a better explanation.” The hurt in his voice is shattering. Coy peers down at the ground, he’s no longer able to look at me.
What do I say? If I mention the strain between us, he will just try and convince me to keep trying. He’ll remind me that a lot has happened in the last month to build tension between us. But that really isn’t it. I can’t be with Coy when all I can think about is Micah. I still don’t know if anything will ever become of Micah and me but I can’t stay with Coy while I’m focused on another guy. That’s like mentally cheating on someone.
“I just think Natahala was right. I haven’t felt as close to you since the last time I bit you. I care about you, a lot.” That earned me a sad grunt. “Whether you believe it or not, I do. I just think that we are better as friends. And if you really thought about it and looked back, maybe you would too. Think about it, Coy. Did you want to kiss me or be with me before I bit you?”
Coy lets out a strangled laugh, “I can’t believe you’re doing this.” It doesn’t slip my notice that he didn’t answer my question. Coy turns away and heads back toward the Coven. After taking a few steps, he stops and turns around. “I guess everyone is right, you are a cold monster.”
My chest tightens, hurt by his remark, even more as tears spill down my face. I guess I deserve his anger. I never should have let this relationship continue as long as it has. I should have ended things with him when we got back from the Covenant. Instead, I dragged him along, letting him think things were okay. This is all on me.
Coy starts walking away again. I should just let him leave and find him later, once he cooled off. That would probably be the best thing but I don’t like leaving things open like this. “Coy wait, let’s talk about this. I still want to be friends.”
Coy turns back with disbelief written all over his face. “Are you serious? Friends? I have news for you, Racquel. You had me as a friend, the most caring and loving kind anyone could ever hope for, but you pushed that away. I don’t know what I expected, really. That’s all you’ve ever done, push people away. I’m surprised Addie’s still around.” He shakes his head as he glares at me. “No. I will never be your friend and once I have my brother back, we are going to get as far away from you monsters as we can.” Coy’s chest is rising hard and fast. He has his hands tight at his sides as he tries reeling in his emotions.
Stop, Racquel, just stop. Don’t let your anger get to you too. I try coaching my building anger away but it doesn’t work. “I guess you forgot.”
Coy frowns. “Forgot what?”
I take a step toward him, not that it makes the distance any closer. “That your brother is now a monster too. You’ll never escape your nightmares.”
Coy just stands there and stares at me. We face off with silent anger. Then he turns his back and tops over the beach, disappearing into the darkness. Once he’s gone, my anger recedes and I collapse in the sand. Why did I do that? I just wanted to break things off cleanly.
I sit there silently shaking. My body fights to breathe, but the weight on my chest feels too heavy. If I don’t find my balance, then Cerelia will start her destruction tomorrow night. With the fresh pain of the fight between me and Coy, I just feel like curling in on myself and disappearing.
I look up to the twinkling bright sky. The same thought that always seems to cross my mind when things get tough, pops up again. Just go. Take off. They can handle Cerelia on their own. It’s not like a mess like you can really be any help. I consider that thought for maybe, oh, two seconds. No. I can’t do that. Even if I’m not able to reach my full potential, I still have to try to stop the doom coming our way.
I curl up in the fetal position, holding my legs tightly to my chest. Maybe I’m wrong. If breaking up with Coy was the right thing to do, why do I hurt this bad? I knew it would suck but I didn’t know it would suck this bad. I continue to cry and think about my decision. Before long, I drift off into darkness.
~
When I wake up it’s completely dark. Where did the moon go? I look around and realize I’m in a dream. I can still feel my body but it’s in a quiet state
of sleep. I start searching for Micah; at least I hope this is a Micah dream.
Then a foggy figure appears. It’s blurry but I can see Micah’s features well enough. I can’t help the bubble of relief and happiness that overtakes me. “Micah?”
“Racquel, listen to me.” This is how it always is with Micah. No warm greetings or how are you doing, just dire messages that he tells me with urgency, before vanishing. Apparently Coy isn’t the only one fooling himself. “I want you to keep my brother safe. Do not allow him to come along tomorrow. Promise me.”
“How do you know that we are coming tomorrow?”
“Cerelia knows. I don’t know how, but she does.” Micah looks around anxiously. I guess staying with Cerelia would make anyone jumpy, although I don’t know what there’s to be afraid of here. It’s just me and him. Maybe that’s the problem.
“How are you able to keep appearing to me?”
“It’s hard to explain.” Micah steps closer to me, cupping my face with his transparent hands. I’m surprised by his gesture. Usually he keeps his distance and tells me what he needs before disappearing. I don’t feel his touch but I close my eyes anyway. I imagine his hands holding me, calming the storm that is always brewing inside me. “Please keep Coy safe tomorrow.”
I open my eyes and look at his face. There’s no color to his eyes or skin. He’s all gray and transparent. I picture his warm green eyes looking at me instead of the cold colorless ones piercing me right now. “I don’t know if he will listen to me. I hurt him pretty bad.”
“I felt your distress. Was it because of my brother? What did he do?” Micah runs his hands through my hair, which doesn’t move. I don’t know what brought out his caring nature but I like it.
“He didn’t do anything. It was my fault.” I don’t really want to get into the mess I made with his brother. I was afraid of what he would think of me. “It’s just-”
Micah steps back with panic on his face. He’s looking down at the floor with concentration. Is he listening to something going on back where his body is? In a panic he looks at me as he backs away. “You have to go Racquel, now. Wake up, they’re coming.”
“Who’s coming?”
Micah doesn’t answer me, he just disappears into a thin line of mist. I’m pulled back into my body in a rush and jump up, holding my pain-filled chest and try to shake off my sleep filled haze. What did Micah mean? Who was coming?
As if in answer, a scream pierces through the night air. It’s coming from the direction of the Coven. I start running up the beach and see smoke coming from some of the houses. As I get closer, I see people running everywhere. I head straight for Alanis’s house. I see Ethan, who is in the process of shifting, along with Evan, Eric, and Trent.
The black wolf—Ethan— towers over the smaller grey wolf, which is Evan. The grey wolf is the size of any normal wild wolf. Ethan, however, is much bigger. Fully-formed Lycans are huge. In human form, most Lycans are muscular and tall. In their wolf form, they’re even bigger. Ethan is probably around six and a half feet tall. In his wolf form, he’s around the same height but hundreds of pounds heavier.
The two wolves split off in a run. The black panther, Trent, and the grizzly bear, Eric, run off in different directions as well. They have their destinations, I have mine. I continue on toward Alanis’ house. Smoke is rising all around but the biggest threat comes from her house.
I’m almost there when a hideous-looking creature jumps out in front of me. Its skin is blistered with what appears to be burns. Its wolf tail wags from side-to-side as it snaps its turtle-like jaws.
No mistaking it, the Chimeras are attacking us.
Chapter Thirteen
Turtle Jaws lunges for me but I avoid his grasp and kick him in the back. He hits face first on the ground. He jumps back up, swiveling around to face me. A loud growl escapes between his snapping turtle jaws. He tries rushing me again but I grab his arm, twisting it behind his back. My hands burn from touching him but I ignore the pain.
I keep his arm pinned with my right hand as I try reaching around with my other hand to grab his face. My grip on his arm loosens, giving him the opportunity to jerk hard to the left. I let go and search for something to impale him with, but there’s nothing but useless twigs on the ground.
Turtle Jaws comes for me again, grabbing my face with his hands. My skin heats up and starts to burn from his touch. I shove him back then kick him square in the chest. He lands with a thud on his back.
I rush him this time, grabbing his head again even though it’s going to burn me. I try twisting his head around but before I’m able to snap his neck, I’m thrown off him and shoved against a tree behind me. The force of the impact knocks the wind out of me. I take in a shaky breath as rage roars through my body.
I can feel my eyes glowing, the scene around me is now bright as day instead of a mild dark. My fangs extend, and I look down to see my hand extending into large claws. My fingernails extend out to sharp points, while the little black hairs on the back of my hands grow a little longer. I have just enough time to think, what the crap, before I’m rushing Turtle Jaws and his new side-kick, another Chimera who decided to crash the party.
I twirl and lash at them with my claws, slicing into and through their skins with sickening ease. Without blinking, I grab Turtle Jaw and snap his neck like a twig. I turn to face his buddy—a creature who looks like a walking iguana with a human face. I slowly start advancing on him.
After a quick glance at his fallen comrade, Iguana Boy turns and runs the other way.
But he doesn’t make it very far. I push my body up into an arching jump to close the thirty foot distance. I land on his back and with a force I didn’t know I had, I twist his neck so hard I decapitate him. Without pausing to feel the shock of what I just did, I start searching for my next victim.
I cover my ears as a piercing scream fills the air. Circling, I try to find the one screaming. There, in front of Alanis’s house, stands a Chimera with its head held back, screaming into the night. She lowers her head to look at me. This Chimera is normal in appearance. No disfigurations. A small gust of wind whips her blonde hair around her face.
I start running toward her, ready to wipe that pretty smirk off her face. I’m almost upon her when I’m thrown back by a burst of power. The red-colored energy slams me back to the ground, pinning me so I can’t move. The girl sways her hips as she slowly sashays her way toward me. Then she straddles me and looks down, shaking her head. “I thought there was supposed to be something special about you.” She pauses for a brief moment, before continuing. “Doesn’t appear that way.”
I try getting up but I can’t. A small circle of red power radiates around the girl, keeping me pinned in place.
The girl smiles wickedly as fangs extend over her lower lip. I notice her eyes are pure black, just like a Vampire’s, but with small specks of red in them. Just like Micah’s. She squats down, hissing at me. I hiss right back at her. Never have I hissed like a snake before but it comes instinctively in response to her.
She inches her way forward but is thrown back. A blue light of power spreads through the yard as the twisted Vampire screams out in pain. Filek and Laveda have their hands outstretched, pushing vamp girl back. Vamp girl wraps herself in a protective red shield as she hisses at them. Chimeras run through her power shield and place their hands on her. The Vampire chants something and before disappearing, she manages a small taunting smile as she fixes me with her dead eyes.
“Wait until tomorrow,” she says, then they disappear, leaving a ring of black smoke behind.
After watching them leave, I flop back down on my back, taking a deep breath. I can feel my fangs recede and my eyes tamp down to a low glow. I glance around and see people running with buckets of water, hoses, and whatever else will hold water.
Groaning, I stand up, feeling a little woozy. My hands and face are tingling from the burns Turtle Jaw gave me. I start walking to help fight the fires when a splitting pain tears throu
gh my head. I reach up, grabbing my head. Like that will stop the pain.
A vision engulfs me. Micah and Cerelia are standing on a stone ledge, looking down at the subjects below. Micah has his head down but Cerelia is laughing, her blood-red lips are twisted into an evil grin.
A group is spread out before them, dressed in black cloaks with hoods. They turn up vials filled with a red liquid, and as they drink the liquid, the air around them turns crimson red. Cerelia’s power is fed by the crowd. She too becomes encased in a red mist that’s connected to the mass of red in front of her.
The red mist dies down and the group raises their hoods. Their red-flecked eyes are focused on something behind them. They start running toward the unseen threat. The scene changes, and I see the black-cloaked figures fighting against other Shadows. Blood spills all over the ground as bodies fall.
I see myself running through the bloodshed, making my way to Cerelia. She’s still standing on the stone ledge, with Micah by her side. He never moves as I advance on them. I jerk as Cerelia stretches out her arm, picking me up. She twirls me in the air like the wind plays with a leaf, then she slams me down into a steel bar, impaling me. My body goes limp and Cerelia doubles over with laughter. Micah just stands there with his head down, never once does he look up.
The vision swirls away as pain shoots through my body. My body sways from side-to-side as I try to get my bearings, but I fail. I hear someone yell my name and before I hit the ground strong arms catch me. I look up to see Filek, and grab hold of his forearm. I can taste blood in my mouth as I try strangling out words, “Cerelia-blood.” Then my body goes slack and I fade out of consciousness and into darkness.
~
I open my eyes to see a bamboo fan circulating at a medium speed. I recognize the interior of the hut I’m staying in. Danika, Meira, and Addie are all sitting in the corner. Morning light is seeping in through the open door. The sound of waves crashing into the beach echoes through the room. It’s all too peaceful, considering the crap everyone just went through.
Blood Burdens (The Shadow World) Page 18
