by Blythe Stone
I was really glad that she’d put on a skirt this morning and not shorts.
She was still gasping and kissing my face. I could tell she was emotional. I’d given her an outlet for all that pain and frustration she’d been feeling earlier in the day. “You’re so good to me, baby,” she whispered, kissing me and adoring me fervently. This always happened when I took her like this. She was always too emotional and too grateful and it made me burst just trying to accept all that admiration and love.
“It made me happy to see you like that and like this. I’m glad you feel better.”
I stopped her kissing assault with one long kiss on her lips and then I smoothed back her hair and looked down at her with a cheesy, proud grin.
She smiled and held a hand to her forehead to try and feel grounded. “Now you can know that all I’ll be feeling in class is you for the rest of the day.”
“You say that and I get even happier- and you get to know that I’m going to be in class thinking about what I want you to do to me later.”
It was a slow, happy kind of torture and it would be delicious. Impossible to block out. I checked my phone and groaned. “We need to go if we’re gonna make it.”
“Awww,” she whined. “But I want to touch you now.” I felt her hands tugging needily at my jeans. “I was too incapacitated to reciprocate. I can’t even think when you touch me like that,” she kept whining.
“Who needs history class when your girl wants to take your pants off,” I smiled and waited. “Not me.”
Her fingers slowly tugged and I felt the button on my jeans come undone. “Come ‘ere,” she said, motioning for me to come close with one waggling finger.
I leaned in to kiss her but she pulled me down with a hand on the back of my neck and whispered. “Can I taste you?” She asked.
“If you don’t now I’ll be very sad,” I told her and kissed her cheek. “How do you want me,” I whispered.
“Take your pants off,” she said with a nod.
As I got off of her she moved back on the seat and sat up with her back against the door to just watch me. I pushed my pants and underwear off. When she saw that, she pushed her body off of the chair and rest her knees down on the floor.
“Sit,” she said, taking my hand and pulling me over to her. I had my back on the middle of the seat and I was almost sitting normally like I would if we were driving but she dipped down and placed my left leg over her shoulder and looked up. “Hold my hair,” she said.
“Okay,” I said, gathering it up and holding it in one hand. “Now what?”
“Now, just relax,” she smiled, all mischief as she dipped her head down and slowly parted my lips with her tongue not even caring to tease like she usually did.
“Fuck,” I groaned. There was no way I was going to survive this.
I felt her right hand come around my left leg so she could use it to help herself as her left hand touched down right below my abs and she dipped in to taste me again.
She was being slow but she worked up an addictive rhythm. I felt myself pushing into her and clenching, knowing when she’d taste and when she’d pull away. She was basically bathing my clit and asking me to be apart of what she was doing. I was watching her and she was hot. I tightened my hand in her hair and felt her hum an encouraging mmmm right into my sex as her tongue softly dragged.
“You taste so good,” she said, looking up at me while she licked me again.
“You look good,” I gasped out, pulling at her hair again.
She pressed harder into me, tilting her head to stare up at me and watch as she teased my clit with her tongue going faster now that she knew what I liked.
It wasn’t going to last long. She was too good and I was too ready after seeing her right before. I kept pushing my body into her and sliding down in the seat by inches. I pulled her head toward me by her hair without even recognizing I was doing it.
She let me, sinking deeper and wanting me to guide her and tell her what to do. I kept her in one place, tilting my head back as the concentrated effort of her tongue hit me. I spread my legs a little wider and she sucked my clit in between her lips and rolled it. I was gone.
I could have died right there and been happy. My hand released her and fell to my side as she kept after me until I was slack and shaking on the seat. I didn’t know if I could even move now.
She kissed up the side of my body from the crook of my knee, all the way up to the side of my breast before resting in front of me and feeling my face lovingly with her hand as she watched me try and recover.
“Perhaps we’re not meant for school,” she said, staring.
She was running her fingers down my neck slowly and teasing my skin with a long endless drag.
“Who needs to learn about British Poetry when they can do this?” She was marveling now.
“And it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you…” It was E. E. Cummings.
“School is dumb and sex is awesome. Well, sex with you is.”
I just wanted to curl up with her and sleep now.
“Mmmm,” she growled, leaning into my neck and biting it. “Your addendum is troubling.”
“What, not all people have your talents in many categories. This is just one of them.”
“Oh, but would you want me if I were talentless?” She mused.
“If you were talentless you wouldn’t be you and I wouldn’t be as enthralled as I am. You can’t take away the talent. It takes part of you away and I love all of you. Don’t make me answer existential questions after you’ve destroyed my brain.”
“Good excuse, Lockhart,” she teased, propping her head up on her hand and staring down at me with her hand tracing my waist. “You must know by now, I delight in destroying you.”
“Yes, and I get just as much enjoyment out of it as you do.”
I pulled my pants over to me. It was a little cold without them. “We’re going to have to get your car detailed,” I said. Laughing.
“We can but it’ll probably just happen again… You wanna go to class now, don’t you?” She asked. “I’ve been selfish in stealing you. My schedule’s mostly free periods and I’m ruining your academic life.”
“No, I want to take a nap with you.” I leaned onto her and closed my eyes. “I don’t care about my classes right now. I barely care at all. We’re already into Stanford and it’s not like I was ever going to beat you out for valedictorian.”
“I worked too damn hard for three whole years,” she said. “And you’re my reward. My beautiful reward.” She rolled into me and pushed her skin onto mine. I moved a bit so she could be more on top. As soon as I did, she rest her forehead in the crook of my neck and let out a sigh, holding herself to me. “I get to touch you and taste you and make you smile when you’ve had a tough day… Sometimes I’m so sure that no one is as lucky as I am.”
“Except for me,” I mumbled. “I like being your prize. It’s cute. I feel like I should pop out of a cake or something.”
“I can arrange that if you’d like,” she laughed, pressing small kisses against my neck.
“Naa, I can find a big box and it’ll be close to the same effect.”
I brushed my fingers over her chest and sighed. “I got you to make up for the horrible first seventeen years, I guess.”
We really did need to move. Go home if not to class. I just felt so comfortable and safe here with her.
“You think we should go home? What do you wanna do?”
“I think you wanted to get through this day,” she said truthfully. “Once we do it, it won’t feel so strange to do it again. Unless you’re really done with this place. I could be but my mother would prefer it if I just stuck it out and act like a stupid normal kid who didn’t know what a waste this all was. Half of my classes aren’t classes at all. It’s different for me I guess. I tried too hard and now I’ve run out of work. What do you think?”
“I guess I can finish the day. I just don’t
want you to have to go if you don’t want to. I can meet you at home if you don’t want to say. You could hang out and read or something… You know… The letter I am going to give you when we part ways. I know being here is a drag.”
“Babe, if I know you’re here, I’d rather be here. Being closer to where you are makes me feel a whole lot better. I hope that doesn’t sound strange. I’m gonna work on being more independent. I know I let myself sort of get lost too for a while back there before Napa. I know that was wrong. I’m gonna work on it.”
“It doesn’t sound strange. I just wanted you to know it was okay. I would be okay. I love knowing you’re close though.”
“Are you going to swim later?”
“No, I don’t want to and I’m going to ask to be taken out of the play. I can do something else for my grade. Our teacher will understand. He’s good about that kind of thing.”
I knew Skylar would be there. We both needed a little time right now. People would have noticed that something was off with us.
“Tell you what,” Olivia said. “I’m going to go home and we’re going to try this out. See how it goes.”
“Okay,” I nodded and looked around. “I just need to make sure I get my phone in case I need to call or vice versa.”
“If you want me here, I can stay here. It’s not hard at all,” she said. “I just think we need to try this whole being apart thing. Really being apart.”
“I love you five tons and I think you’re right. I’ll be in class and I’ve got my phone. You have lots of fun books to read and this.” I pulled the folded piece of paper out of my pocket and put it in her hand. “And then I’ll come home and we can have dinner and talk about what we did when we were… Apart.”
I really hated that word but we needed to get used to this. Part of our problem might stem from this. I didn’t know if that was true but it would be healthy to get a little space. I wanted her to have time to be Olivia and do Olivia things.
“It’s just a couple of hours,” she said, trying to soothe me. She leaned in and kissed me. “I’ll miss you terribly and it’ll probably be shit but then I’ll have you again and who knows, maybe you’ll have learned something interesting, unlike me,” she scoffed out a laugh.
“Hardly. I’ve got boring classes that I could do in my sleep except Drama and that’s going to be interesting. I’ll tell Skylar what I’m going to do and then talk to Mr. Foster.”
I squared my shoulders and pulled my tank top and hoodie back on.
“You’re right though, it will be shit and then we’ll see each other again and it will be happy. Maybe my heart will grow fonder.” I gave her a smile and a kiss before I started struggling with my jeans.
“Not gonna lie, I kinda want to stay away from you so you’ll attack me again,” she joked. It was fun to think about but I knew it wasn’t really true.
“You do that and you’ll be in for a really wild ride,” I promised. I buttoned my jeans, thankful for the huge backseat space, as I grabbed my underwear. “Here, this can be your souvenir,” I said stuffing them into her hand.
“Wow, you’re a dirty pervert,” she said, but she took them and threw them into the front where I couldn’t reach.
“Yep and don’t you forget it. One less item of clothing to take off later,” I told her, grabbing her shirt and pulling her in to kiss the hell out of her. It was always too easy to shut her up. One kiss and she was speechless.
“Love you, babe.” I opened the car door and was out like a shot, closing it fast because she wasn't exactly decent. I walked away smiling at the thought of seeing her later. We’d make it.
I swept my hair up and put it back with the hair tie I had on my wrist. My fingers still smelled of her and I knew I’d be intoxicated by what happened in the backseat of her car for the rest of the day.
Chapter 4
Olivia
That Avery Lockhart is one hell of a lay.
I felt crude now in the back of my car just thinking about how easily she could turn me into a puddle just ready to be splashed for her. I could be a soldier for her.
Ridiculous me was so ready to write that Yearbook spread now. I wouldn’t write it about all her awards or her dedication. I’d write about this, this right here, the way she took me in my backseat on lunch because I begged- and I’m a useless fool- good for nothing when she’s nowhere beside me.
This morning, I spent several periods avoiding my phone and imagining all the different ways she could be feeling. It was a waste of time and one she’d reproach me for if she really knew.
The second she grabbed me outside it was like I was found again. Without her things were muddy and then I saw her again and it was all: clear, clear, clear. Sweet shining crystal...
She took me to heaven in my back seat. It gave me the strength to suggest really being apart for the afternoon.
I’d made promises to her but I made promises to myself. This morning I felt myself breaking all my promises to me.
It’s selfish and strange but if I want this to work I have to be true to both of us. I’m scared about leaving now but I found her this morning and things were okay.
For once I hadn’t been the one to trigger Avery. That made me feel a little less responsible but it was all bad news and all a complication I wish Avery didn’t have to go through.
Some triggers never die though, I think…
I’d gotten a few books yesterday while Avery was with her parents. Some were specifically on PTSD and others dealt with sexual assault and the mental aftermath. I tried to read while she was away but I had no time.
When she got home I felt a little weepy and affected. She was going through so much. I just wanted to be her shining light. It was a complicated thing.
I adjusted my top and my skirt, looking for clues of our rendezvous and not seeing them.
Getting home was top priority. I needed to prove to us both that I could allow myself to just be me.
I crawled into the front and turned the car on.
She’d been so adorable and I still felt her everywhere, still smelt her, still tasted her on my lips.
I looked to the side of me and saw her underwear on the ground.
It made me laugh. I couldn’t take it. I leaned over and picked it up, shoving it quickly into the glove box. I pulled my phone over and sent her a text.
Olivia: Still trying to clean up your mess.
As I drove home all I could think about was the folded up letter that was burning a polite little hole in my fragile state of mind.
Avery had made a remarkable habit of sweeping me up with her words. I wasn’t sure I could survive another letter, the last one had been so eloquent. In writing she was so succinct and her word choices always breathed. Her last letter moved me to tears. Given the timing, I knew that this letter would probably do just the same. We were both too raw not to feel things so intensely.
I promised myself to at least wait until I got home. Otherwise I might not ever make it.
I stopped at a light and felt my phone buzz in my pocket.
When the light turned green I drove a little ways and turned out in the bus stop to check on her text since I knew it had to be her.
Avery: Thanks for suggesting we go to the car. You’re a genius. My mess is your mess. We’re an old married couple. I hope its okay I’m texting you since we’re trying to be all independent.
She made me laugh. She was so ridiculous. Playful texts were definitely allowed.
Olivia: I still want you in my head. You don’t have to pay attention to me but I like talking at you.
Co-dependence was strange. It made me laugh to think about us though. Avery had changed me a lot.
I put the phone down again and checked the traffic before pulling back out into the main road and continuing my drive. She’d probably text again but home was so close and I reeeally wanted to read her secret letter.
I drove quickly since there was no traffic around midday.
When I reached home I parke
d in front of the guest house and hurried inside to change. I wanted some lazy pool time with her letter and maybe a book.
As an afterthought I brought a notebook too and a pen. I wanted to try and respond. At least for my own peace of mind. Even if it was just to organize my thoughts for later. Working through things on my own made more sense than subjecting her to all my trivial shit.
I checked my phone before going out.
Avery: Yes! In your head a.k.a. The place I’d like to live. Did you read it yet?
Avery: Don’t tell me. No… tell me. Arg. Never mind. I’m ridiculous but I love you.
Olivia: You sound nervous… Should I burn it?
