by Katee Robert
Tristan wasn’t a romantic man. Wining and dining and pretty words were all just a different kind of lying, and he saw no benefit in stringing willing partners along. If he had a heart, it beat for one woman alone. He just never thought he’d get this close to her again.
Her hands fell to his pants, and he suddenly knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that if he fucked her on this table it would rock both their worlds right down to the core. Afterward, she’d shut him out. For good this time. Amarante could abide by no weakness, and letting him close enough to strike reeked of weakness. She’d assume Zhao would take advantage of it, would use her soft feelings for Tristan to attempt to manipulate her into doing what he wanted. She knew better than to make that mistake.
He wouldn’t give her time to close the door on them completely.
Tristan pulled away. Amarante barely got a sound of protest out before he flipped her around and planted her hands on the table. “Not yet.”
“If you don’t—”
“Shhh.” He undid the front of her slacks. “Let me take the edge off.”
Her breath hissed out and she arched her hips, but he knew better than to overwhelm her completely. She cursed. “Either touch me or take off your pants.”
“I’m going to touch you, Te.” He had to close his eyes to keep control as he slipped a hand beneath her lace panties. Wet. She was so fucking wet just from that kiss. He traced her opening with a single finger. “Let me in.”
She widened her stance, and he thanked whatever had caused her to decide on loose fitting pants today. Tristan planted his free hand next to hers on the table and pressed himself against the back of her body. Their layers of clothing had felt like too much when her mouth was on his, but now he wasn’t sure if it would be enough to keep him on the straight and narrow.
Play the long game, asshole. A little pain now; a whole lot of pleasure later.
He slid a single finger into her and cursed. “Fuck, Te. You’re so goddamn tight.” Just pumping his finger slowly into her was enough to have him flashing back to that first night they spent together, when their friendship had crossed the line into something else. Fumbling in the dark like the pair of virgins they were. All awkward enthusiasm and whispered words he couldn’t handle thinking about, even now.
Promises neither one of them kept.
He worked a second finger into her. The desire to tease this out, to keep her poised on the edge for as long as he could so this wouldn’t end, nearly overwhelmed him. He pressed the heel of his hand against her clit. “I’ve got you.”
“No, you don’t.” Her hips bucked and a ragged cry slipped from her lips as she ground down on his hand, fucking his fingers. He tried to pull back but it was too late. Amarante came with a soft sound that was almost a sob. Her knees buckled, and he barely caught her around the waist in time to keep her off the floor.
Even knowing better, Tristan set her on the table and kissed her again. She allowed it for one second, two, three. On the fourth, she gently pushed him away. “This was a mistake.”
“No, it wasn’t.”
Amarante moved off the table and wobbled a little bit, but the scathing look she sent his way kept him from trying to touch her again. She fastened her pants quickly. “If he thinks this will smooth the way and make me more agreeable, he’s picked the wrong angle.”
He gritted his teeth, hating that she threw her father between them like a bomb. “He doesn’t know I’m here.”
“Tristan.” She looked away and then back at him. “Respect me enough not to lie to me. You are his man, through and through. You know it. I know it. You do nothing without his command.”
It was tempting to tell her exactly what would happen to him if Zhao found out about this little interlude, about Tristan’s plans for Amarante. He knew better, though. Either she wouldn’t believe him, or she’d use that information to further her own goals for being here. Amarante might be Tristan’s priority at this point, but he knew better than to expect the same from her.
He’d always come second to her.
He cleared his throat and adjusted his cock in his pants. “What you’re4 planning won’t work. Zhao is too well protected.”
Amarante smoothed her hair back into place. If not for the flush staining her cheeks, he’d almost be able to believe that she hadn’t just come apart in his arms. She moved to the door. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Yes, she did. But he dropped it all the same. “Te.”
She stopped with her hand on the doorknob. “Yes?”
“No matter what you think, it’s not over between us.”
“Yes, Tristan. It is.” She walked out the door without looking back.
Chapter 7
Amarante barely kept it together long enough to make it back to her room. She half expected Tristan to follow, had almost relished the idea of going another round with him. Fighting or fucking. That kind of thing was more up her sister’s alley than Amarante’s. She didn’t lose control. She couldn’t afford to, not with all the responsibilities weighing on her shoulders.
From the moment she and her siblings purchased the Island of Ys and built the resort from the ground up, she’d known that hers was not a position that meant giving in to impulses. Too much rode on her words and actions. Over the years, there had been plenty of men—and no small number of women—who looked at Death and thought a place in her bed would secure them the kind of power they craved. She never took any of them up on their offers. She couldn’t afford for them to be right, for their presence and the potential pleasure they offered to cloud her mind, to muddy her plan.
Cora was the only exception, but she’d long since proven that she had no interest in the Horsemen outside of Amarante’s friendship. Just like Amarante had proven that she enjoyed Cora’s company, not her identity as Lust, one of the Virtuous Sins. Even then, they held themselves at a certain distance.
Less than twenty-four hours in the Warren and she had to admit that her paranoia that kept everyone away had a basis in truth. Two kisses. One orgasm. That was all it took for her to start softening toward Tristan. For her to start craving him.
She hadn’t wanted to stop. Not last night and not today. She couldn’t trust herself around him, and that was a massive complication because if the meeting today was any indication, Zhao intended to keep his right-hand man close. Maybe this whole thing really was part of the underhanded negotiations. She couldn’t be sure, couldn’t afford to take anything for granted.
Amarante walked to the table that held the phone and stared at it. Calling Kenzie right now would be a mistake, but for the first time in years, she didn’t know what to do. She’d have an easier time if Tristan was attempting to kill her. That Amarante knew how to deal with. But his overwhelming words and the way he touched her, kissed her, made her come? No, she had no framework for this.
She never expected to come face to face with him again. Not really. They parted ways on poor terms, and Amarante had no interest in her father before discovering that he was the one who funded and ran Camp Bueller. No doubt he had some other camp set up even now since Bueller was abandoned sometime after Amarante and her siblings escaped it. Zhao was evil in human form.
She was Death.
One breath. Another. Another. Inhale and exhale until her thoughts stopped their frantic circling. She could handle anything he threw at her. She already had. This thing with Tristan was no different. It was simply a matter of approaching things from a logical perspective. Line up the evidence, consider her options, and then act decisively.
First, she needed more information.
With that decided, Amarante didn’t hesitate to pick up the phone. She dialed Kenzie’s number and listened to it ring. Her sister hadn’t gotten many words in edgewise on the last call, but without their brothers interrupting, no doubt she’d have plenty to say. Best to let her get it out and then cut through the rage with a few cold words.
But when Kenzie answered, she sounded calm and pleas
ant. “You know, you’ve really pissed off a lot of people with this little stunt, Amarante.”
Flying to certain death was hardly a stunt, especially when done to protect them, but she clenched her jaw and kept the comment internal. “I need your help.”
A significant pause. “Why do I suspect that you’re not calling to request my delightful presence to back you up?”
“Because I’m not.” Having her siblings in the Warren would just give Zhao more targets. If he truly wanted her back in the fold, he wouldn’t hesitate to remove Luca and Kenzie. They weren’t blood, and that was obviously all that mattered to Zhao if he thought something as mundane as genetic ties would cause her to forgive and forget all his many sins.
More, if Amarante managed to complete her goal in killing him, she would be the only one here to suffer the consequences. The reason the Warren was so effective, beyond the obvious, was because a breaking of the rules went all the way to the top. If one of your staff broke the rules, the person they answered to was punished as well as the person they answered to, assuming they were on the property. Nicholai and his people were unrelenting, which meant they didn’t have to enact that threat often. If the others were here when she acted, there was a very large chance they would see the same consequences she would.
She had no intention of dying, but she couldn’t risk their lives on her gamble.
Finally, Kenzie sighed. “Luca and Ryu are half a second from planning an assault on the Warren. You could have played this a hundred different ways, all of which were better options.”
“No, I couldn’t.” Not with the time she had, not with the threat rising against them the closer they came to the truth. Amarante replayed Kenzie’s words in her head. “You’re not participating in the plans?”
“Why did you call?”
She could press, could ask what Kenzie was avoiding telling her, but digging the truth out of her sister before Kenzie was ready to talk represented an impossible task. “I… need some advice.” Her sister gasped and she straightened. “What’s wrong?”
“The honorable Amarante needs advice? I’m shocked. Shocked, I tell you.”
She closed her eyes and tried to exhale through the adrenaline surge. Damn it, she should have known Kenzie would play this up for all it was worth. She would have known if she was thinking clearly. “Get it all out of your system now so you can focus.”
“Oh, I’m focused like a laser. What’s this about? You’ve never come to me for advice before.”
“Yes, I have.”
Kenzie laughed a little. “No, Te, you haven’t. We might plan together as a group, but you always plot your own course and the rest of us fall into line because you’re brilliant and most of the time you’re right. Not this time, of course, but I’d be lying if I said your track record was anything less than stellar.”
That warmed her while simultaneously making her feel like shit. Life was complicated. “I value your opinions. All of you.”
“I never said you didn’t. You just steamroll right over us when it suits you.” Kenzie cleared her throat. “Look, I’m not trying to read you the riot act. We’re in this place because you’re a badass bitch who will cut her way through anything that rises up against us, and you taught us to survive. I’m still going to kick your ass for pulling this bullshit, but I’m not surprised by it the same way the boys are. If I’d been thinking clearly when all the stuff with Ryu went down, I would have realized this would be your play.”
Amarante wouldn’t apologize for doing what needed to be done. Not even to Kenzie. Not when it would keep them safe from the thing that haunted their shared past. Vengeance and justice may be two sides to the same coin, but they both demanded the same price.
Zhao’s head on a platter, his empire burned to ash and scattered to the wind.
She had the strongest urge to hang up and end this conversation before she admitted how far out of her control this situation had become. Amarante muscled down the impulse. She was as good as she was because she knew her limits. This thing with Tristan was a limit, a blind spot she couldn’t afford to ignore. “I have a problem.”
“A problem I can help you with. I got it. Stop stalling and tell me what’s going on.”
She took a deep breath. “Do you remember the first few years when we were in the city after we got out?” No need to name the place they escaped. “All those times I disappeared?”
“Sure. Most of the time you came back with food or whatever we needed.”
Yes, because Tristan had taught her how to pick pockets and a hundred little tricks to make people ignore her so she could do what it took to survive. She pressed her lips together. Admitting this felt like admitting a deep, dark sin, but Kenzie couldn’t give her the appropriate advice without all the information. “I met someone. He helped me, helped us. We were… friends.”
Silence for several long moments. “Okay,” Kenzie said slowly. “This is a weird secret and also feels really big. Why didn’t you tell us?”
“Because he was mine. He made me feel… not normal, exactly, but as close as I had ever come to it.” Selfish, maybe, but she’d spent so many years committing acts no child should know about, let alone participate in. And when they finally escaped, she had the others to care for. Luca had only been twelve, and Kenzie not much older. At seventeen, Amarante was not prepared for the realities of flying below the radar and staying alive. Tristan had helped.
“I get that in a weird way, I guess.” A sound like she gave herself a shake. “Okay, so this guy was a friend and helped you.”
To tell the rest or not? She shook her head. She’d gone too far to back out now. “We were friends, and then we were more.”
Kenzie’s shocked gasp nearly made her laugh. Her sister recovered fast, though. “Does anyone else know about this?”
“I think Luca suspects that there was something else going on.” He’d found her right after Tristan had left for good, when the weight of the future had taken her to her knees. Neither of them had spoken about it since. “But no, not really.”
“Wait a minute, why are you telling me about this now?” She didn’t give her a chance to answer, barreling on in the way that only Kenzie could. “Holy shit, is it Nicholai?”
“What? No. No.” She braced herself. “It’s Tristan. Zhao Fai’s right hand man.”
Silence for a beat. Two. “No fucking shit?” Kenzie whispered. “What are the odds of that?”
She’d had weeks to think about it since discovering the identity of the mystery person they’d spent so much of their lives hunting. Since realizing her father was responsible. “Pretty good considering I don’t think Zhao ever lost track of us.” She hadn’t thought too much about the coincidence of Tristan getting placement with her father at the time, had been too caught up in the betrayal of his choice and then in pursuing her own goals while determined not to think about him.
“He snatched up the guy you had feelings for.” Kenzie still sounded shell-shocked. “I mean, it’s barely a blip on the evil scale considering the other shit he’s responsible for, but that’s still fucked up.”
“Yes.”
“And now Tristan is part of said evil empire. Fuck, Te, that’s really shitty. I’m sorry.”
If only it ended there. She swallowed hard. “He’s here. Tristan.”
“Of course he is. It’s a brilliant play to undermine you, trotting out the guy you had feelings for that he stole. He should know better, though.”
She appreciated Kenzie’s faith in her, even if it was misplaced. “I wasn’t prepared. I thought I was, but he’s already making me crazy. Every time I turn around, he’s there and it feels like he’s beneath my skin. I… Kenzie, I’m losing control.”
“You’ve only been there like twenty-four hours.”
“That’s exactly my point.” She couldn’t make herself get into the details of what happened a short time ago in that board room, not when her body still felt pliant and buzzed from the orgasm. Pliant and buzz
ed and aching for more. “I’m not certain I can hold out indefinitely.”
Just like that, the shock was gone from Kenzie’s voice and she was all business. “Have you kissed him?”
“Yes.”
“More?”
“Yes.” It felt like setting down a burden she’d carried for days to admit as much. She leaned against the table and took a slow breath. “I want more.”
“Of course you want more. I would say fuck someone else immediately, but we both know you won’t. Even your thing with Cora is too controlled to hold up against what he’s bringing to the table.”
The thought of having sex with someone else—even Cora—didn’t hold a candle to the temptation Tristan offered . She closed her eyes. “I don’t understand why it’s him.”
“Honey, it sounds like he was really, really important to you at one point. You aren’t a person who can just turn something like that off, no matter how many years you spent apart. Unresolved feelings only get more complicated with time. Ask me how I know.” Kenzie had just dealt with a vaguely similar situation when her one night stand from years before showed up and refused to leave until she gave him a chance. That had worked out, but it didn’t mean a damn thing. Liam wasn’t working for the enemy. He hasn’t chosen the enemy over Kenzie. “We don’t get a choice in who we respond to.” Kenzie cleared her throat. “How can I help?”
Even talking this much has helped. Not with a plan for the future, but to let her draw in her first full breath since she walked into the Warren and saw Tristan. “I can’t control myself when I’m around him.”
“Okay, two questions.”
She braced herself. “All right.”
“Do your feelings for Tristan affect how you plan to move forward with Zhao?”
That was easy. “No. Not in the least.” She would not be turned from her course of action.
