Down, down, down into the empty abyss of sleep.
Chapter Ten
Thalia’s head was pounding, and she could feel the draw towards consciousness beckoning her like warning bells – but it seemed far away. It was like she was trapped in quicksand, her brain and her body seemed too slow to respond. Unable to pull her out of the thick depths of sleep. She thought she heard a voice above her, saying her name, but it was gone, and so was she. Back under, away from the sound, down, down, down.
What had happened?
Trying to think was like trying to get a car in gear without using the clutch.
She had been running. With Katherine. Then – fuck, what had happened? An accident? She remembered a scream. Was someone hurt?
Her body rang like a gong. All the internal alarms going off at once, and she finally broke the surface of her consciousness.
She immediately regretted it.
She was nauseous. Her head felt like it was stuffed with sawdust and cotton. Her throat was dry and she tried to swallow but there was nothing there. Someone was touching her, brushing her hair out of her face. James? She forced her eyes open even though they felt glued shut.
Dark hair, blue-gray eyes, a serious mouth.
No. Oh God, oh God, oh God.
“Marcus?” Thalia croaked out his name and clenched her eyes shut, trying to turn her head away from his touch. Even that small movement made the pounding in her temples worse.
“Hi, Thalia.” His voice. Fuck, it was actually his voice. Nightmare. Must be a nightmare.
Fear was coiling in her stomach, making the nausea worse. He cupped her cheek in his hand and she tried to swat his hand away, but her body’s response had a lag and he simply ignored the weak attempt.
“Wake up. Come on, you’ve been asleep all day.” His voice was closer, and she could sense him leaning over her. She hadn’t had a nightmare like this in months, and she’d never had one where she could barely move. Thalia felt him kiss her forehead and she jerked back from him, the barest hint of motor skills returning as adrenaline started to flow. He even smelled like Marcus. How the fuck did she even remember what he smelled like? When she pried her eyes open again his expression was thunderous and she felt panic seize her chest. “Thalia.” It was him. It was actually him. She shoved herself away awkwardly, which made the room spin and she thought she might be sick. That was when she realized she was on a bed. Naked. She was fucking naked, with Marcus, on a bed.
How the fuck did this happen?
Thalia whimpered, wanting to blink away the image of him sitting next to her. When he reached for her she lunged off the bed and managed to land gracelessly on a concrete floor on her knees. Her legs wouldn’t obey her brain’s command to stand up, and the floor seemed to be moving like ocean waves under her. She crawled forward, but she heard the bed creak as he stood up and she turned so she could see him. She couldn’t take her eyes off him as she slid back on shaky arms and legs, pushing herself backwards. If he wasn’t going to disappear like the nightmare he was supposed to be, she needed to know where he was.
“That looked like it hurt.” Marcus took a step towards her, sighing like someone might when dealing with a petulant child.
“Do-” her voice cracked, her mouth was so dry. Why was everything so fucking hard? Her mouth, her voice, her brain, her muscles – nothing was responding right. “Don’t come near me.” Her voice was raspy, and he ignored her and reached for her.
Adrenaline flooded her and she somehow got to her feet, swaying violently back from his hand until she stumbled backwards into a wall. Her eyes scanned the room. Concrete walls, concrete floor, tiles in the ceiling.
But, there was a door.
She went for it, but he was on her as soon as her hand brushed the industrial metal. His arms wrapped tight around her and she lost it. She screamed and kicked, finally nailing his shin sharply with her heel. He grunted and then he had his hand in her hair. “Stop it! Stop it right now, Thalia. Don’t make me hurt you.” His voice was rough in her ear, and she felt the tears hot on her cheeks. It couldn’t be Marcus, it couldn’t be. Marcus was history, Marcus was just a nightmare now. One she didn’t even have as often anymore. He was the bogeyman. He couldn’t be real. Couldn’t be here. Couldn’t be touching her. His arms relaxed slightly and one of his hands trailed down her side, his face burying into her neck as he spoke, “Good girl. God, Thalia... you feel so good in my arms.”
Thalia had stilled in his grip, and she could feel his bare chest against her back. He was hard, his erection pressing through his military style pants, the same ones he’d worn around her before. All pockets and black on black hardware. “Let go of me.” Even with her voice cracking she put all her strength behind the demand – it came out like a plea anyway.
“I want us to talk. Will you behave?” Marcus’ voice was poisoned honey. He could pretend to be nice, he’d always been good at pretending to be nice. But he wasn’t nice, he was a psychopath. All the hours Thalia had spent talking to Ailsa flooded her, and she could feel herself rising towards panic. She needed his hands off her. He raised his voice, “Thalia! Will you behave?”
A quick nod and he let go. She stumbled forward without the support of his arms, catching herself on the wall because her legs were like Bambi’s, unsteady and wobbling.
“The drugs should be wearing off soon. Can we sit down? You’re not good enough to stand yet.” Marcus was gesturing towards the bed like some gracious fucking host.
“You drugged me?” Thalia crossed her arms over her chest, pressing her thighs together to try and hide herself. She tried to remember what had happened, but it was blank. Nothing after the steady crunch of frost as they ran, the early morning light bouncing off the snow – there was nothing. Disbelief shook her, tears stinging her eyes as her situation began to sink in. “You fucking kidnapped me? Again?!”
“Thalia.” He said her name and she pushed a hand into her hair, clenching her fist as she tried to maintain control over the horrible tide of panic inside her. She started shaking her head, tears streaking her cheeks as he sighed from a few steps away.
“Oh my God! What the FUCK, Marcus?!” She screeched the words at him, glancing at him before the sight of him became too much. His dark hair was longer now. Messy. He looked thinner, but it made the sharp contours of his muscles stand out in relief. Her memory of what he looked like had blurred over time and she hated that he was still so fucking attractive. It was a mask. The worst kind of mask that hid the truth of who he was, that made people look at him differently. The mask that had made her trust him, to not think twice those times he had walked her to her car at work. Nausea washed over her again and she felt faint for a second.
“You’re going to hurt yourself trying to walk around. Come sit down and we will talk.” Marcus continued pointing at the bed, and when Thalia didn’t move she watched his anger spike and then recede as he took a deep, slow breath.
“We’re not talking. We’re not doing anything. Let me go, Marcus. Right now. Let me out of here.” Thalia looked at the door again, the gears in her brain slowly coming online.
“No. Now come over -”
“LET ME OUT, MARCUS!” Thalia screamed and Marcus was suddenly in her face. His fists tight at his sides as he gritted his teeth. She flinched, expecting him to hit her, but it didn’t come. He dropped his eyes from her and she could see him holding himself back. It was almost scarier than him actually touching her.
“It’s okay, Thalia. I get it. I know you’ll take some time to adjust, but that’s fine. You’re back with me now, and everything is going to be fine.” He was crazy. Marcus was fucking crazy. Thalia felt a hysterical whimper rise in her chest as she looked at him again.
“Everything is not fine, and it’s not going to be fine, Marcus. Take me back! I don’t know what sick fucking fantasy you have about this but I am not going to be -” He backhanded her mid-rant and pain burst in white light across her cheekbone.
There was a beat of si
lence and then Marcus shouted, “FUCK. God dammit, Thalia! Stop it, just stop pushing me!” His voice was razor edged, and she took a few shaky steps back from him. Taking a deep breath she held onto her strength through her wobbling legs and her fuzzy head, she wasn’t going to cry even though it hurt. She wasn’t that weak, terrified girl that Marcus had ripped out of a stairwell. He was standing a few feet away from her, rubbing his hands over his face, “Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hit you, Thalia. You just have to stop pushing me. Please come sit down so you don’t fall over.”
“I don’t want to sit down. Just take me back, Marcus. Please. I have a life! I have a life, a good life, you can’t do this to me again! You got what you wanted, he paid you for me, I’m not yours to -” Thalia was trying to speak calmly, to reach some logical side of him, but it didn’t work. He slammed his fist into the door and she jumped, pressing herself into the corner as he growled and paced back towards the metal framed bed – the only piece of furniture in the small room.
“God dammit! I love you, Thalia, can’t you fucking see that? I’ve been miserable without you. I should have never let you go. I should have never let Anthony even arrange the fucking party!” He let out a yell of frustration, and looked at her with a tormented expression. If it had been anyone else on the planet she might have felt something like pity, or concern, but it wasn’t possible with him.
“This isn’t love, Marcus.” She shook her head slowly, speaking quietly as if it could keep his rage in check.
“This is love. This is the kind of love that asshole could never show you. I would give you anything, Thalia. I can make you happy, I can.” Marcus groaned, taking a half-step towards her before he stopped himself.
“Then give me my freedom.” Thalia pointed at the door, “Let me go. You want to prove you love me? Then let me out of here.”
“I can’t give you that! Anything else, ask me for anything else. But you have to remember – I need you to remember what we had. If you’ll just fucking remember you’ll understand! I need you to fucking understand!” Marcus was bordering on hysteria when he finally stopped talking, his arms held wide like what he was saying was an obvious fact.
There was no brimming realization inside her, no sudden discovery at being in his presence. How could he even expect those things? There was only anger simmering inside her. This was unfair. No. More than unfair, this was evil. What could she have possibly done to deserve this? Just as her life was falling in to place, her whole world rounding out with James, and friends, and a great job, and a future – for the universe to let Marcus find her? In fucking New York? On the other side of the fucking country from where he’d kept her? She felt cursed.
“Please, just try to remember, to understand why we’re meant for each other.” Marcus’ voice was a quiet rumble, and she snapped.
“THERE’S NOTHING TO UNDERSTAND MARCUS!” She slid down the wall, choking back the urge to sob. “Don’t you see that? Don’t you see that there is no happy ending?! People like you don’t get a happy ending! You don’t!”
“We can have one if you’ll just fucking listen to me!” He shouted at her.
“I don’t want to listen to you! I don’t want to even look at you! I want to go home to James, dammit! I love HIM! I am never going to fucking love you, Marcus!” The second the words were out of her mouth she knew she’d gone too far. He was across the space between them in an instant, dragging her up from the floor to slam her back against the wall.
“Shut up, Thalia!” His fingers wrapped around her throat and squeezed. She dug her nails into his wrists as panic squeezed her rapidly emptying lungs. “You are MINE and you’re ruining everything.” Marcus shouted inches from her face, his fingers were bruising her throat as he pulled her forward and slammed her head back hard enough to make lights flash behind her eyes. He was angry, that was obvious, but the strange tone in his voice could have been some other desperate emotion.
She didn’t care.
Thalia felt her nails break skin, and she pressed harder. This time she wasn’t afraid to fight him, but her vision was fuzzing on the edges, spots dancing. He growled and released her throat, breaking her grip on his wrists with no effort. She immediately tried to shove him back, coughing on her breaths as she moved to bring her knee up between his legs, but he was quick and her movements were still sluggish. In an instant she was flipped chest first against the wall, her bare skin chilled by the concrete. She tried to push back from the wall but he wouldn’t let her. His hands pinned her wrists painfully above her head and he pressed himself against her, his weight holding her there.
The reminder of the first time he’d hurt her in the stairwell wasn’t lost on her as she screamed in frustration. Hating herself for her weakness, for the complete uselessness of her fight. He growled and started shouting in her ear.
“All I wanted was to talk, Thalia! Just to fucking talk, but you don’t even have the courtesy to give me that. Even after all I did to get you back! After the money I’ve spent, the time I’ve spent so that I wouldn’t lose you. I never gave up, Thalia, not in all this time! Not on what we could be.” His mouth was against her neck, and he inhaled deeply against her hair. Was he seriously smelling her? A shudder moved through her and she tugged hard against his grip on her wrists but he only squeezed them harder. With a groan he yelled at her again, “Why are you fighting me?! We had something, something real. We did. Why won’t you just admit it?!” He took a shaky breath as if forcing himself to calm down. “It’s okay, I’m just going to have to remind you of why we were perfect together, of why you need me.” Marcus’ voice rumbled in her ear and she pressed her thighs together as she felt his knee trying to push her legs apart.
“I do not need you, Marcus! I’m never going to need you! I’m NOT yours!” She spat out the words, even as a sour fear filled her stomach.
He grabbed her hair and dragged her back from the wall, her weak legs stumbling. “Yes. You are and you do, Thalia. You just need a reminder.” Marcus pulled her towards the bed and fear washed over her like an ice bath.
“Don’t! PLEASE! Don’t do this, Marcus!” She shoved at his chest as he pushed her onto the bed, and he shushed her. He leaned over her and she tried to slap him but he caught her wrist easily. Too fast she was pinned beneath him, her wrists gathered above her head as he held her thighs apart by digging his knees in. She could feel his weight bruising her as he worked at his pants.
“You need me. You always did. I showed you what you liked, I was the only one who knew what you liked, and I can remind you again. Just relax, stop fighting me, and you’ll see what I mean. You’ll understand.” Marcus kept one hand on her wrists as he shifted his pants down his hips.
She released a frustrated scream, before babbling, “Please! Please, don’t do this. You don’t have to do this, we can talk. We can fucking talk! I’ll talk to you! I’ll talk to you about anything, just please...” Thalia was begging, arching her back to try and free her hands. Her thighs were aching from the pressure of his weight on them, his knees pushing them wider until tears choked her.
“Shh, it’s okay, you’ll remember what we have. Stop fighting so hard.” Marcus was insane. He pushed his boxers out of the way and she watched his cock spring up between them. Panic grabbed her, she couldn’t let this happen, not again.
“NO! No, Marcus, no!” She pleaded, shaking her head before she forced her eyes above her to the metal bars of the headboard of the bed. His fingers swept up her cleft and she was relieved that she wasn’t wet. It didn’t deter him though, he forced a finger inside her and she whimpered, biting her lip hard.
“I know the drugs are messing with you, Thalia. It’s okay...” He sounded like he was talking to someone else, someone not begging him to stop, someone not fighting him. His thumb rolled over her clit and her hips bucked involuntarily as he plucked the bundle of nerves. After a few minutes she could feel the wetness gathering, his shallow thrusts joined by a second finger as he brushed kisses across her shoulde
r.
“Don’t do this. Please don’t do this. Dammit, I’m begging you!” Thalia’s voice was weak as her body betrayed her. Ailsa had told her it was biology, well, fuck biology.
“That’s it, Thalia.” He groaned above her as he slid his fingers in deep a few times, her pussy responding regardless of her pleas. The heat was a distant sensation inside her, the tension of his tight circles on her clit pushed away in her mind. He finally removed his fingers and she sighed in relief for a moment until she saw him slip them into his mouth and groan. “I have missed you so much,” he whispered, and Thalia tried to twist away when she felt him lower his hips, but he held her thighs open for him.
“No, no, no, Marcus -” She whimpered as he thrust inside her, it hurt, and his moan above her made her stomach flip. He drew back and pushed forward further, and she felt the tears slipping out, pooling at her temples as they found her hair.
How had he even found her? It had been almost a year. Why did he even still care? How could this even be happening?
He thrust hard, and her hips twitched with the urge to respond. “God, Thalia, you’re perfect.” He dropped his weight over her, his hips swinging back and slamming forward hard enough to rock the bed against the wall behind her. He stretched her, filled her, and her body betrayed her because it wanted more. Her body reacted to being restrained, to the heavy weight above her, to the hard cock inside her, the ache in her thighs and her wrists. She had to stop this. But she couldn’t move, his fingers were digging painfully into her wrists to hold them above her, and each thrust was a dangerous ember inside her, looking for the first opportunity to catch fire.
Salvaged by Love (Thalia Book 3) (The Thalia Series) Page 16
