Pathological

by Jinkang Wang

  One day, Xiaoxue sat staring at a book, when suddenly she slammed it shut and said, “Mommy, I don’t dare study anymore. The more I learn, the less sure I am about science.”

  Mei Yin was interested. “Really? Why?”

  “I used to think science was all light, no shadow; that it could do anything, it was even more powerful than God. There were still flaws, tragedies, and pain in the world only because science hadn’t gone far enough yet. A day would come when human existence would be a perfect paradise. For instance, people in the future would live free from disease. Now I know that was just a fantasy.”

  “You’re right. Science will never completely eliminate disease.”

  “Science invented antibiotics—and that led to drug-resistant bacteria, which are evolving faster than humans can come up with new medicines; science eliminated smallpox—which led to a dangerous smallpox vacuum, which Zia Baj and other wicked people took advantage of; science allows even people with hereditary illnesses to live till an old age—but that just means bad genes are allowed to proliferate, setting time bombs for the future. Science invented human cloning—but if that leads to asexual reproduction, so men and women don’t love each other anymore, how awful that would be!” She sighed. “God’s got a strange personality, both kind and nasty, holding on to our ankles, pushing us two steps forward then pulling us back a step and a half.”

  Mei Yin laughed. “That’s right, he’s a true eccentric. But in the end, he’s not too bad, he still let us advance half a step.”

  “Mommy, now I’m worried for all the animals in the world, like wildebeests, lions, and dolphins.”

  “Why?”

  “They’ve evolved an equilibrium with their own pathogens, but now human beings are creating so many superpathogens, what if one of them turns out to also cause infections in wild animals? The animals would be in trouble then! They haven’t evolved to resist them, and they don’t have our modern hospitals!”

  Mei Yin smiled and nodded, but didn’t answer. These were exactly the thoughts she’d had at the age of twelve, watching the great wildebeest migration. And now she’d planted them in Xiaoxue’s consciousness too.

  “Mommy, I think your point of view is right. Humanity needs to live in harmony with nature, rather than fighting it.”

  Mei Yin thought gleefully that perhaps in a year or two, she’d be able to hang her ex-husband’s crucifix around Xiaoxue’s neck. She had no idea that in a few months’ time, Xiaoxue’s beliefs would undergo a massive reversal.

  Two months after Mei Yin was released on medical parole, Xue Yu and Xiaoxue got married. They didn’t dare delay any longer, because her pregnancy was starting to show. People were more open-minded these days, but there was still something embarrassing about being a big-bellied bride.

  The celebration combined city and country customs. They had the reception in the courtyard, which was uniquely suitable, because where could you find a courtyard big enough for thirty tables in any city these days? The dinner was catered by Nanyang’s Jinjue Hotel Restaurant, which sent two chefs and several dozen helpers. Xue Yu’s parents traveled from Wuhan, and adored Xiaoxue from their first sight of her. Such a beautiful, young, cheerful, and virtuous girl, and their son had caught her, the lucky rascal. Later on, when they learned she was giving them a grandchild, their affection knew no bounds. This was a good place to live too, not like Wuhan, where houses were all crammed together and you could hear your neighbors playing mahjong all the way across the next building. When they retired, they said, they’d come to live with them. Xiaoxue smiled and said they were very welcome, there were more than thirty rooms, plenty of space for them. The old couple were a little uneasy about Mei Yin’s status—a convict out on medical parole. But Xue Yu explained the situation to them. Mei Yin was sent to prison for her unconventional beliefs about medical science, and because she’d tried to put these beliefs into practice. He said she could be considered a “scientific political prisoner.” That set the old couple’s minds somewhat at ease.

  Xiaoxue had invited Mother Liu and Mother Chen of Nanyang’s Sacred Heart Orphanage, who showed up with all the children in tow, aged two to ten, taking up three whole tables. The kids clutched Xiaoxue’s legs and hollered, “Sister Xiaoxue, we want wedding candy,” making so much noise they sounded like a pond full of frogs. The two mothers hugged Mei Yin and Xiaoxue, weeping tears of joy. “The saying is right, happiness comes after great misfortune. Xiaoxue’s been through so much, and now you’ve finally come through the other side.”

  Of the orphans who’d been there at the same time as Xiaoxue, she’d lost touch with all except Xiaokai and Yuanyuan. Both of them had left for school, but took time off to come back. Xiaokai was embarrassed, feeling uncouth and awkward, while Xiaoxue had blossomed into beauty, graceful and elegant—a proper lady. Yuanyuan gasped. “Xiaoxue, you’re so beautiful. All those fashion magazine editors must be blind, not to put you on their covers! Did you know, Xiaokai’s had a crush on you for seven or eight years now. Even when you had your pockmarks, he still liked you. It’s a shame you lost touch for so long, and now you’ve been nabbed by Mr. Xue.”

  Xiaokai blushed. “What nonsense, Yuanyuan!”

  Yuanyuan pouted. “You told me yourself!”

  Xiaokai’s face was bright red, but he didn’t dare answer back. Moved, Xiaoxue took his hand and generously said, “Xiaokai, thank you for your affection.”

  Then Yuanyuan noticed Xiaoxue’s figure and whispered, “Pregnant?” Xiaoxue nodded shyly, and Yuanyuan rapped her on the forehead, giggling. “You don’t waste any time, do you? That’s good, I get to be an aunt soon.”

  Mayor Jin had been invited too, but didn’t show. After the scandal, the municipal government had been very cautious about Mei Yin’s company, carefully sticking to its “double negative” policy, not budging an inch either way. On one hand, they’d sent Mei Yin to prison, refusing to cut her sentence despite granting her parole, because they had to make their official stance clear to the world. On the other hand, the WHO was allowed to fund the research project, and the city adopted a don’t-ask-don’t-tell policy about the company’s illegal experiments. Jin had been promoted to mayor, and if he were seen attending the wedding of the Heavenly Corp. general manager, it would damage their carefully cultivated ambiguity. He sent a handsome gift and phoned Mei Yin. “A public servant’s life is not his own. Sister Mei, you’ll understand.”

  Mei Yin said she understood very well, and thanked him for the present.

  There was one other important guest at the wedding: Xue Yu’s uncle, Zhao Yuzhou. He’d always had time for his nephew, and naturally turned up on this occasion. According to local custom, the bride’s uncle was always the guest of honor, and had to be served well. If he wasn’t happy with his treatment, he could give everyone a hard time. But Xiaoxue had no family, so Mommy Mei represented the whole of the bride’s side. Mommy Mei teased Xue Yu, saying, “Maybe Mr. Zhao should play the part of the bride’s uncle.” Zhao Yuzhou thought his new niece was wonderful, and gave the couple a very expensive present. But he had a bone to pick with them. How could they let Mei Yin stay with them after she got out of prison? It was outrageous. She had refused to eradicate smallpox, then sneaked the virus into the orphans’ birthday cake! Yet here she was, allowed a peaceful life like some dowager. But it was his nephew’s wedding day, and he had no intention of making a scene. Fortunately, local custom dictated that the bride’s parents weren’t allowed to take part in the ceremony, so there was no danger of them locking horns. She would have a separate celebration later—traditional wedding ceremonies always culminated in games around the wedding chamber, and if the pranks got out of hand, it would be embarrassing for the bride’s parents.

  This wedding was comparatively tame, though—the guests only played a few token tricks, such as making them kiss in public, try to take bites from a suspended apple, light everyone’s cigarettes, and so on. The wedding ended early, as many of the guests, including the chefs and o
rphans, had a long drive back to Nanyang. The local guests began drifting away too, the courtyard lights went out, and all was still again. The newlyweds, Xue Yu’s parents, and Zhao Yuzhou went into the living room, where Mei Yin was waiting for them. As everyone sat, she smiled. “Now that the ceremony’s over, I have a little ritual of my own. Xue Yu, turn off the lights.”

  Xue Yu wasn’t sure what was going on, but did as he was told. Mei Yin wheeled herself out of the room, then in a moment, sailed back in with a blaze of light. Mei Yin had a tiny birthday cake on her lap, twenty-two candles flickering merrily on it. Her face bathed in the warm golden light, like a golden sculpture. She laughed. “The wedding just happened to be on Xiaoxue’s birthday. I knew everyone would be full from dinner, so I just got a little cake. We can have a bite each.”

  Xue Yu scratched his head. They’d both been so busy preparing for the wedding that they’d completely forgotten about Xiaoxue’s birthday. “I’ll need to be a better husband,” he said. “I guess mothers and daughters are always closer! Xiaoxue, make a wish.”

  Looking at her mother’s withered legs, Xiaoxue silently wished her mother better health, then blew out the candles and gave everyone a slice of cake. Mei Yin saw Zhao Yuzhou was sitting coldly to one side, and reached out to him. “Mr. Zhao, it’s been seven years since we met in America. Do you still remember that man, Zia Baj?”

  Zhao Yuzhou replied frostily, “That Afghan American scientist? I remember him.”

  “Who knows where he’s hidden himself. I keep thinking he’s vanished into some dark cave like a vampire bat, and someday he’ll fly out and start harming people again.”

  Furious, Zhao Yuzhou barked, “Why do you think so badly of him? Was it what he said that day? In my view, he was absolutely right to criticize the hypocrisy of the West, ripping open the syphilitic sores of the white people. Of course, his proposals went too far. I advised moderation to him.”

  Mei Yin stared at him, aghast. “You don’t know?” But she realized he had no idea. People only remembered the terrorists who’d appeared on TV, while Zia Baj had remained below the surface, and his name hadn’t registered with most people. “Zia Baj was behind that terrorist attack.”

  Zhao was shocked, and obviously disbelieving. Mei Yin went on. “There’s no doubt about it, I have firsthand information. I informed US Homeland Security of his links to some terrorists; they called to thank me and to say they’d confirmed my suspicions. Don’t you remember, at that meeting, Zia Baj said he was leaving America right away? He did leave that day, and then vanished, and still hasn’t been arrested.”

  Xue Yu knew who they were talking about—even Xiaoxue did too. Mei Yin had first lied about deliberately sowing smallpox in the orphanage, saying that Zia Baj must have infected her at that meeting. Even when her lie was later revealed, no one forgot his name. Xue Yu’s mother was a little embarrassed for her brother—he still obviously supported this terrorist mastermind’s opinions. And how supercilious to say he’d “advised moderation.” Zhao could only simmer in shame and rage, his face alternating white and red.

  Seeing how awkward the conversation had become, Mei Yin tried to change the subject. “Xiaoxue, your uncle’s finished his cake, get him another slice.”

  That presented Zhao with an excellent target, and he grabbed Xiaoxue’s wrist, sneering, “No, I won’t have any more. Who knows what viruses might lurk in that cake.”

  And with that, he quit the room in a huff, heading to bed. The direct reference to Mei Yin’s past “crime” left everyone uncomfortable. After a while, Mei Yin smiled. “The old man has quite a strong personality. Come on, let’s eat. More cake, anyone?”

  Xue Yu’s parents nodded like chickens pecking at grain, eager to show they weren’t worried. “Yes, let’s have another slice.” As they ate, Mei Yin said, “It’s getting late. Xue Yu and Xiaoxue must be exhausted. Let’s all get some rest.”

  By breakfast the next morning, the awkwardness of the day before had been forgotten, and only Zhao Yuzhou was still sullen. Xue Yu’s parents loved the surroundings—“like a fairy kingdom”—and decided to stay a few more days. Zhao Yuzhou was flying back to Beijing that day. After breakfast, he called his nephew into his room for a chat. A little later, Xue Yu emerged and said to Xiaoxue, “I have to see how things are going at the office. Could you take Uncle to the airport?” Then, sotto voce, he said, “Actually, he was the one who asked for you to drive him. I guess he has something to say to you.”

  Xiaoxue did as he asked. She had a good impression of the uncle, although he was a little hot tempered. He was still a very frank old man; his likes and dislikes were all heartfelt. They spoke of this and that on the way, and got to the airport very early, so they found a quiet place to sit. The uncle said, “Xiaoxue, there’s something I want to warn you about. I know you won’t listen to me, but whether or not you pay attention, I have to do my duty.”

  “Please go ahead, Uncle.”

  “You know the role Mei Yin played in that epidemic seven years ago?”

  “Yes.”

  “No, I don’t think you do. That outbreak was no accidental leak. She spread the virus on purpose.”

  “I know. Xue Yu told me.”

  The uncle was stunned. “You know? In that case, why would you . . . She killed a man. She disfigured orphans. It’s wickedness.”

  Although she’d made her peace with all this, it still made her sad to hear it said this way. She replied quietly, “I know, I know all that. The dead man was Dr. Ma, from the alleyway by the orphanage. He got sick because I went to see him. The most disfigured child in the orphanage was me. It was only a few months ago that Xue Yu brought me to Beijing for reconstructive surgery.”

  He was even more shocked, and studied her features carefully, to confirm that she had once been pockmarked. Now he was in a frenzy of rage. More things Xue Yu had kept from him. So he’d brought her to Beijing for this surgery, and hadn’t thought to visit his uncle? And he still didn’t understand: Xiaoxue ought to loathe Mei Yin. Why recognize this “mother”? Why bring her from prison to their home? Xiaoxue had pulled herself out of her sadness, and smiled. “Uncle, Mother Mei is a good person, she only did what she did out of medical principles, not to harm anyone. We all understand.”

  The uncle snorted. “I don’t understand at all! Xiaoxue, I’m advising you both to stay far away from this woman. She’s bad news. Her whole body stinks of death! Don’t think I’m simply bad-mouthing her, you have to hear this now or you might regret it later on. Remember, stay far from her, don’t let tragedy land on you both, and especially not on your child!”

  Hearing him mention the child, something clenched in Xiaoxue’s heart. She forced herself to smile. “Uncle, thank you for your concern, I’m truly grateful. And I’ll think about what you said.”

  Zhao Yuzhou knew he’d gone too far, and there was no use pressing his point. After they’d sat in silence for a while, it was time for him to go. Xiaoxue didn’t leave right away after the plane took off, but stayed in the departure lounge on her own for a long time. Of course she would never turn against Mommy Mei on his say-so, but his confident prediction of disaster—he’d sounded like a sorcerer, setting a curse—still plagued her heart.

  He’d mentioned her unborn child!

  Back home, she didn’t let her worry show. Xue Yu was back from work, and seemed as cheerful as always, joking around. When they’d retired to their room, Xue Yu asked with a laugh, “Did Uncle warn you? That we should stay away from Mother Mei? Because she’s bad luck?”

  “Yes, he did.”

  “That old busybody. Once he sets himself against someone, he never lets it go. Too bad Mother Mei got on his bad side. But to be fair, Uncle’s saying all this because of a difference in political opinions, not because of some personal grudge. You have to understand him.”

  “I do.”

  Xue Yu could tell something was troubling his wife. “What’s wrong? You seem unhappy.” He had to ask a few times before she told hi
m, “Uncle warned me that if we didn’t keep our distance from Mother Mei, disaster would fall on our son’s head. I don’t believe his nonsense, of course, but I don’t know, it just stuck with me.”

  “That old man and his inauspicious mouth. He said some bad-luck things in front of me. Now you too! We can’t let Mother Mei know about this.”

  Xiaoxue murmured, “Of course not.”

  Mother Mei only let the newlyweds rest for three days before urging Xiaoxue to start her lessons again. She said they’d already delayed seven years, there was no more time to waste. Xiaoxue was suffering from morning sickness; unable to eat, she was growing thinner by the day, and had no energy. Xue Yu was worried, and kept urging her to eat something, bringing home all kinds of fruits and foods for her to try. Mother Mei worried too, but her method was completely different. She said to Xue Yu, “Don’t bother forcing her to eat, just let nature take its course. Evolution created ‘morning sickness,’ so it must have some function. There are errors and omissions in evolution, but they’re usually small details. With something as important as reproduction, evolution usually gets it right. Scientists have hypothesized that pregnant women throw up to protect the fetus at its most vulnerable, by ensuring minimal contact with potentially dangerous foods—don’t forget, plants evolved to keep herbivores away, often by developing toxins in their fruits.”

  Xue Yu had always trusted Mother Mei, and so, though it hurt him to see his wife listless and limp, he stopped trying to make her eat. After some time, Xiaoxue noticed that Xue Yu and her mother seemed to be reaching a deeper rapport, apparently based on their continuing work. When her husband came home from work, he often went to Mommy Mei’s room first to exchange a few words with her, never very much, a few quick statements. Sometimes, she didn’t even reply, just nodded, but the depth of their shared knowledge was palpable. One day in bed, Xiaoxue mentioned this to her husband, in mock jealousy, and he replied, “What a thing to say! Mommy loves you so much, and you’re still not satisfied. I ought to be the one who is jealous!”