Reckless Abandon

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Reckless Abandon Page 9

by J N Owens


  I sit there, just staring at her. I can’t figure out what is wrong with this woman, why does she just keep blurting these things out to me? First the wife, now Sara. She has diarrhea of the mouth. This woman cannot stop telling me everything. Like fucking everything. I wonder how long I can sit here and let her tell me all of his secrets. But how much do I really want to know? Can I really trust what this crazy woman tells me? She has not proven to be the soundest of minds. Oh what the hell, lets see what she has to say.

  “So, Sara lived with him?” she doesn’t turn to look at me or anything, just keeps going.

  “Yes, for almost a year. Her and that boy of hers. She claimed to not know who or where the father was, so she enjoyed playing family with Scott. He took care of them. From what I understand she didn’t take it well when he broke things off.” That would explain why he was at a children’s hospital, something I have never even asked him. Why have I never asked him that? Because I’m a stupid girl, who apparently is controlled by her hormones.

  “I can see that happening, Scott is a pretty special person. So, what else happened?”

  “Nothing really. I only met her a few times. We spent Christmas down there last year with them. That was the last time I saw her. Next thing I knew he was telling me about you. And I have to say I am beyond thrilled. You are smart and really have your head on straight.”

  Ha, yeah, my head is not on straight. I have fucked this whole thing up. Who is this guy? And why have I not asked the right questions? How can I be so stupid?

  “Well, thank you, that makes me really happy to hear you say that.” I am biting back my anger and a little fear at this point. I need to get out of here. I am not exactly sure what is going on, but something isn’t right. I don’t know if this woman knows she has let me in on his secrets and basically told me her son is a liar or if she is just oblivious to everything around her. I’m ready to get home so I can think and get my head on straight. “Um Judy, if you will excuse me, I’m going to head upstairs and start packing. I need to shower, and I think Scott wanted to get on the road today.”

  “Oh, I thought y’all weren’t leaving till tomorrow.”

  “Oh well he had mentioned going back a little early.” She looks like she may cry.

  “Oh, of course, I understand. This weekend has been a little strained. I hope next time will be better. Maybe we can get out and do something. I’ll make plans.”

  “That will be wonderful. Thank you for everything Judy. You have been great.”

  I make my way upstairs and start packing. Scott comes in not too long after me. He stops in the doorway watching my mad dash at packing. His eyes follow me around the room for about a minute then he stops me. “What are you doing?”

  “I’m packing. What does it look like? We are leaving. Now!”

  “What are you talking about? We aren’t going back until Tuesday or Wednesday. I told you that.” I stop and stare at him, locking eyes with him. I’m trying to reign in the fury that is boiling deep down. And the fear, the fear is at the top. I don’t know what he is capable of, but I’m so damn angry.

  “I’m not staying here another day. Do you understand me? Your mother has freaked the fuck out on me. I think I witnessed her nervous breakdown. She has in less than 2 days told me that you were married and that you lied to me about Sara. I. AM. GOING. THE. FUCK. HOME. NOW.” I have started shaking and tears are running down my face. It’s all just too much.

  “OK, let’s go.” He walks further into the room and helps me throw everything into the suitcases and then grabs them. He starts to head out of the room and then stops. He turns to me and just wraps his arms around me pulling me in close. I’m still crying as he runs his hands up and down my back, kissing me on top of my head.

  “I’m sorry. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. I wanted us to have a nice weekend away. I promise I will make it up to you.” He pulls away then leans in and presses a soft kiss to my lips.

  I nod because I don’t know what to say. So, I just stand there nodding my head like an idiot. He takes my hand in one hand and the suitcases in another and leads me out the door. He says nothing to his parents, just walks out the door. We get in his truck and start the long drive back.

  8

  Finley

  The drive home is miserable. I try to sleep the whole way just to avoid having to talk to Scott. When I’m not sleeping, I put my headphones in and work on my charts. We pull up at my house and I basically jump out of the truck, running into my house. I tell Scott I’m exhausted and need to rest before going back to work. He asks to come in, but I tell him no. I need to think. I need to figure out what I want to do. I have no idea what I even believe anymore. His mother is obviously a nut case. But what she said seems true. It made a lot of sense and it all fits. I’m just exhausted by all this drama. I feel like he is lying to me about basically everything. I am just so confused.

  Okay. I know he showed me that letter to prove he was being honest about the whole job thing, but now part of me is still questioning him. And then he was straight up honest about the whole marriage thing, or at least he seemed honest, but he still hid it from me. But then there is the whole Sara thing. Oh, and what the fuck is with him just disappearing for the entire day? I see changes in him, in his attitude and how he reacts to certain things. I try to tell myself that it’s just the fact that people are questioning him, but I really don’t think that’s it. It may be true that I have never been in a real relationship before, but I’m pretty sure it’s still just basic etiquette to tell the person you are fucking on the regular and say you love the truth.

  I have to talk this out and try to get a clear head about it, so

  I decide to ask my sisters to come over and have a girl’s night. They come over Wednesday and we cook dinner together. We make some homemade crawfish etouffee, sit around eating and drinking margaritas. I tell them everything that is on my mind and how I feel about it all. I let them know exactly what I’m concerned about and what I think about it all. Of course, Layla isn’t shy at all about what she thinks.

  “I told you from day one I thought he was a shady motherfucker. He was too smooth, and he doesn’t like answering questions about himself. I don’t like him. I don’t like the way he does that little chuckle laugh after he says something, like you know he is serious, but he wants you to think he is joking. He is a condescending asshole. I say kick his ass to the curb. I’ll do it for you.” I roll my eyes. She is always dramatic.

  I look to Emory.

  “Well, I don’t know. I haven’t been around him a lot. Have you asked him? I mean have you sat down and talked to him about your concerns?”

  “No, I mean we asked him about the whole job thing that Sunday, remember. And he took me to his house.”

  * * *

  “Yeah we know, and he fucked your brains out apparently because now you don’t remember that he is a liar liar pants on fire,” Layla interrupts.

  “Oh my god Layla shut up. Before that happened. He showed me the governor’s letter. He showed me the proof of that, but now, I don’t know what to think.”

  “But what about the girl calling?”

  “Oh, about that, so he said she wasn’t anyone. They were just friends and he helped her out. But his mom seems to be suffering with diarrhea of the mouth because she wouldn’t shut up about anything. She told me over the weekend that Scott was married, and then told me that this Sara girl lived with Scott up until he met me.”

  “What? Are your serious right now?” Emory is sitting up straight now.

  “Yes, I was in shock. That’s why we came back early. He admitted to being married. Said he didn’t consider it a real marriage because they never lived together or whatever. Some bullshit like that. I don’t know. He never said anything about the Sara thing except she stayed with him and had a drug problem. No mention of the kid or anything. Now, he keeps apologizing and texts me that he wants to make up the weekend to me.”

  “This is crazy. I would walk
away now before you get in too far,” Layla says with a troubled look on her face.

  “I agree. There is something shady going on. I don’t trust him, and I haven’t ever really met him.” Emory isn’t one to judge unfairly, so this is making me think.

  “Come on guys, everyone deserves a chance to explain. I have to at least let him explain the Sara thing. I never even heard him out about it. Or am I crazy? You know I’ve never been in a relationship before. Isn’t this how these things work? But I feel like it shouldn’t be this hard.”

  “Seriously? No, It shouldn’t be this hard. You can’t be this naïve. Come on sis. What reasonable explanation can there be? Why would his mother say those things if it wasn’t true? She liked you. She wouldn’t be trying to get rid of you.” Emory is looking at me with her big sad eyes.

  “Well not necessarily. She could have been pretending to like you, making it seem like she was just giving you all this information about Scott innocently, when really, she was just sabotaging you and him. I mean I don’t really understand that kind of thing, but people do that shit. You said it yourself, the bitch was crazy. I don’t think he deserves your time, but there also maybe another explanation, if you want me to be reasonable.” Layla deadpans, rolling her eyes with the last part, as she pops a piece of popcorn I her mouth.

  “You’re right, both of you. I’m such an idiot. An idiot that has been fooled by a nice ass, pretty eyes, and great sex. Gah, this sucks.” I fall back onto the couch putting a pillow over my face to hide my shame.

  “Get up bitch, this is what we are going to do. First you are not going to wallow in self-pity. You are going to get your ass up, and we are going to go to dinner.”

  “It’s 11 at night.” Emory looks at her phone.

  “Not tonight dummy. Friday night. You will invite Scotts. I’m gonna bring a date, and, Em, you bring your boy, guy friend, whatever he is. We will all eat, drink, and have conversational things. We will weed it out of him. The guys will be able to tell if he is lying or full of shit. Guys always know that about other guys.”

  “Oooh that’s good. Yeah let’s do that.” Emory is excited all of a sudden.

  “OK. Let’s do it.”

  When Friday comes, Scott picks me up and we meet Layla and Emory at the restaurant. They have brought friends with them. Emory brought that dick head she has a crush on, I think his name is Daniel and Layla brought her fuck buddy Jonah. This should be interesting. If Layla can keep her hand out of Jonah’s crotch long enough for them to even pay attention to anything else going on it will be a miracle. I hope Emory makes it through dinner without going into a depression because fuck wad is just that, a fuck wad. I don’t even know what she sees in him. He is not at all what I would think her type is, he has on fucking khakis and a polo. The polo is tucked into the khakis, his hair is slicked back, and I swear he has on fucking flip flops at night in a restaurant. What the actual fuck. I don’t even know what I’m looking at. Plus, he acts like a douche bag on top of it. What is going on with her? She can do so much better. Anyway, we finally get seated. And everyone orders drinks very quickly. You can tell this is going to be a very awkward night. Small talk is not going well. So finally, Emory speaks up.

  “Oh my god, you won’t believe what happened to Lisa Wednesday night.” Scott spits his drink across the table, we all turn to look at him like what the fuck.

  “Wrong pipe,” he manages to gasp out. We are all still looking at him like he is crazy. But Emory continues

  “OK, go on. What happened?” both Finley and Layla say at the same time and then laugh.

  “Well, you know she likes to hang out at sports bars because she is a skank who likes to go pick up sport junkie guys. I don’t know it’s her thing, whatever. I don’t say anything. I love her but she has an issue. Well, she went to that one on Veterans, that big one. She met this guy, couldn’t remember his name. She said it was Frank, or Todd, I don’t know. Anyway, she said he was nice but average, but then his friend showed up. His name was Parker, or Preston, something. Whatever. She said he was amazing. Like super model hot but like in a ruggish way. Long blondish hair and green eyes. Well, he didn’t even talk to them just sat there all broody and weird. Then, he caught her staring and flat out asked her to suck him off. So, she went out to the parking lot sucked him off. He fucked her, and then got in his truck and drove off with her still standing naked in the parking lot.” I am sitting there dumbfounded, Layla and Em or laughing. Like this is something that is funny.

  Scott looks sick, his entire face has gone white. The other guys are laughing. Which is interesting to me. I think about it for a minute. These guys are snickering, but Scott who I didn’t trust is white as a ghost. Why? Then Layla speaks.

  “That’s hysterical. It serves her right for always pulling that crap. You can’t go out to bars and try to find guys like she does. Not that you can’t find guys in bars but not the way she does it. She skanks around looking for hook ups. She might as well wear a sign that says I just want a fuck so don’t bother asking my name or worrying about being nice.”

  “That’s terrible. No matter how someone goes about it, no one deserves to be treated that way.” I tell Layla. I don’t care what Lisa does. She is nasty, always has been. She would fuck your brother, your father, and your husband in front of your face, all at the same time, but that shouldn’t happen to anyone.

  “Well she wasn’t upset. She found the whole thing funny. She said it was a great fuck. And if she ever sees him again, she will take him for another round. She doesn’t care how he leaves her.”

  “Of course, she doesn’t.”

  “See that’s what I’m saying, she does it to herself. She doesn’t care about her self-worth.” Layla just keeps on. I think at this point it’s just us having our own conversation. The guys are in their own world. I look over and Scott looks like he is about to be sick. Daniel is on his phone texting and Jonah is watching the game that is on the TV over the bar. A lot of help they are gonna be tonight.

  “Oh yeah one more thing. I did tell Lisa that we would be here tonight. She had a date, but she hasn’t seen either of you for so long. She said she was going to try and swing by just to say hi.”

  “Oh yay.” Me and Layla both say sarcastically at the same time, then look at each other and laugh. Scott picks up his drink and downs it. He has sweat pouring down his face. His hair is stuck to his forehead, he really looks like he is about to be sick. Which is odd because he was perfectly fine before we came.

  “Are you feeling OK? You look pale. Are you sick? Is it something you ate? You’re sweating. Do you need to leave?” I look him over and reach up and touch his face.

  “You feel ice cold and clammy. We should go. Do you feel like you’re going to be sick?” I have dipped my napkin in my ice water and I’m rubbing it on his face.

  “Yea, actually I think I might.”

  “OK, let’s get you home.”

  We stand up to leave and as I lean down to grab my purse Scott starts heaving, he has a hold of my arm and his grip gets tighter. I grab him around his back and pull him to the bathroom.

  “Oh my God, Scott are you OK? Come on hurry.” I pull him inside the bathroom and help him splash cold water on his face. I grab some paper towels and wet them so he can bring them with him. I make sure he isn’t going to vomit and then I help him out of the bathroom. He is acting so weird though as we leave the bathroom. He is looking all over the place. I’m holding onto him and walking us out, I try to stop by the table to say goodbye, but he grabs me and rushes me out the front door. He has never acted like this before. Lisa had just gotten there, I wanted to at least say hi, but with him getting sick like that I couldn’t just leave him. So, I get him in the car and go around to the driver side and get in. I drive us to my house. I get out and walk around and let him out.

  “Are you feeling any better? I can’t imagine what got you so sick so suddenly.”

  “I don’t know. I just got real hot and nauseous. I’m feeling
better now though. Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. I would invite you in, but if you’re contagious I really don’t want to get sick, especially right now. I have a lot coming up. I’m sorry.”

  “No, I get it. That’s fine. Maybe next time.” He smiles at me.

  “Yeah, of course.” I start to walk up the walkway to my door when I hear him shout.

  “We should move in together.” He just yells it, and then it’s just out there. I turn slowly to him. He has lost his fucking mind.

  “What? Are you insane? Why would you say that? We have dated for like 5 minutes. That’s going to be hard no for me. Um, thank you. I think you have a bug and you need to go home and drink lots of fluids rest. I will talk to you later, when you are feeling better and you aren’t delusional.”

  “I’m not crazy. I’m thinking clearly for the first time in a long time. I don’t like being away from you. So, we should live together.” He has started walking closer to me. And he definitely has that crazy look in his eyes. Maybe he is on something. I haven’t even had a chance to really think about how I really feel with all the new information I have and if I believe anything he says. Hell, we haven’t addressed anything from the last weekend yet, and here he is talking about living together.

  “Okay crazy. Listen to me. First of all, we have a lot we need to talk about. There is still more I need to hear from you and get straightened out. Second, you have a farm, so you can’t move in with me. Because, look around, where are you gonna put your animals? I have 2 feet of space. And I am not, I repeat, not moving that far away from the hospital. Plus, I love my house. I put my blood sweat and tears into this place. I think this is something we should talk about later, like when we have known each other longer than a month.” I have to take a step back from him because I can smell him. He smells really good, and those eyes. No. I am too logical to ever think that moving in with this man, that I have way too many questions about is a good idea. It doesn’t matter how sexy he is or how many times he can make me come. Then I remember what his mother said about him moving Sara in fast. Is this a thing with him? Does he just like the thought of a relationship and family?

 

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