“I’ll look like I’m trying to play grown up but I’ll feel like a movie star,” Kathy said.
Bea touched her arm. “Believe it or not, Harley used to say that.”
“She did?”
“Yep, I’d arrange spa days and that was always her response. Come on, let’s get going.”
Wanting to cry, Bea didn’t give in. She wasn’t sad about the wedding at all, just missed her best friend and she wanted to keep today about Jason and Kathy and not about her own loss. A true friendship was developing between her and Kathy, who was such a nice person. No one would ever replace Harley, but Kathy could fill the space her absence left behind.
Calm seas and little wind made for a perfect fishing day. Not usually a man who succumbed to emotional issues, Joe was prompted to hug his sons periodically throughout the morning but refrained. Already weepy eyed at the sight of them preparing the boat before he was finished with his first cup of coffee, he’d struggle keeping his emotions in check.
“Did Mom pack food?” Dave asked. “I’m starving.”
“What do you think?” Joe replied, pointing to a large insulated bag and an even larger cooler. “Help yourself.”
Unzipping the bag, Dave discovered a large thermos of coffee and his mother’s homemade cinnamon bread, still hot, along with a tub of butter. “Mom’s the best,” he said. “Do you want some of this Jay?”
“I’m too nervous to eat,” he said, pulling up on his line.
“You should eat,” Dave said. “It’ll make you feel better.”
“Ha! I wish it had that effect, trust me.”
“Are you ready for another walk down the aisle?” Joe asked.
“I’m ready,” Jason said without hesitation. “I wish it was over with though.”
Anxiety stemming from the proceedings, he’d hoped they could take the kids and elope. But his daughters nixed that idea. “Dad, Kathy’s never been married,” Bennie said. “Let her have the experience of walking down the aisle.”
“I know. I just hate a big production,” he said, unable to keep the whine out of his voice.
“There will only be the family, Uncle Andy, the aunts and a few old friends of Kathy’s. There’s no production. Aunt Bea kept it simple,” Bennie explained. And then getting closer to him, whispering, she added. “If I didn’t know better, I’d swear she was taking her directions for this thing directly from Mom.”
Jason frowned, thinking about what she said. Feeling Harley’s presence growing in the past days, he’d started dreaming about her during the week, waking up in a sweat after realistic encounters with her that included shopping at Walmart, or meeting in the hallway at work for a quick kiss. Unlike the early dreams, he didn’t cry, awaking with a smile on his face now, at peace.
Reaching for Bennie, he pulled her into a hug. “Thank you, honey. I’m sure it will be lovely. I’ll live.”
“You’d better,” she said, laughing. “Don’t get cold feet.”
“Nothing like that, I swear. This is the right thing to do.”
Andy said the talk around the OR, probably instigated by Tiffany, was that Jason was marrying his babysitter. It stung that she could see through him because there was some truth to it. The girls absolutely loved Kathy, and it was clear by her actions that she loved them, too. His affection was growing for Laura, worrying about her, wanting to look into setting aside some kind of trust for her. It just made sense for them to join their families.
The reality of sharing his life with another woman struck with a force he’d underestimated. He’d already dealt with Kathy living in the house he’d built with Harley, soon sleeping in the bed they’d shared, that she died in, standing at the same stove, sitting in the same recliner. He’d painfully given away the surfaces she’d laid on and bought new items, chosen with Kathy’s input.
“You don’t have to buy new,” Kathy insisted. “I loved Harley. I think you and I and the girls together was what she wanted. I love using her things.”
But Jason knew it was part of the process of moving on for him. As much as he was devoted to the memory of his wife, there was going to be a time soon where she might become an interloper when the inevitable trials of marriage struck, and he wanted to avoid that.
Now that the actual day had arrived, he was sure he was doing the right thing. After the wedding, they’d have a small reception at the cottage. Planning a night away with Kathy was both exciting and melancholy. They’d made the decision that waiting until their wedding night to be together might seem archaic, but because to their daughters it might make an important statement, it was worth it. Trying to decide what she might enjoy, going to Atlantic City was out of the question. Then Cape May came to mind. Kathy liked art and antiques and good food. It would be the perfect place to spend the night.
He’d taken the next week off work and she was off for the summer. They’d wait to move her things over to Jason’s house until then so it would be a busy week, adding to his anxiety.
Finally, the hour was upon them. “I can’t believe it’s time,” Kathy said, stepping into the dress while Tina and Betsy held on to it.
“Yep,” Betsy replied. “And it will continue to go faster the older you get.”
Straightening up, Tina zipped her in. “Well, what do you think?” she asked, posing in front of the mirror again, turning this way and that.
“It’s perfect,” Betsy said. “You’re gorgeous.”
“It really is beautiful on you,” Tina said, bouncing a little bit in excitement. “I’m so pleased. The dress was made for you.”
“Literally,” Kathy said, bending to kiss her cheek. “Thank you so much. I know that doesn’t say enough.”
“What about shoes?” Betsy asked.
“Ballet slippers,” Kathy said. “I’m almost as tall as he is barefoot. I don’t want to tower.”
Puffs of white cloud skittled across an azure sky. The wind blowing through rigging and halyards of a sailboat sent mournful echoes across the yard, sounds Harley had loved. Andy and his wife tried to help sooth Jason’s anxiety, whispering to him, encouraging him, when Joe finally came out of the cottage.
“Can I ask everyone to be seated?” he called out. “Jason and Dave, please come up to the porch. Attendants, please join us here. Guests, please be seated.”
“Well, this is it,” Jason whispered. “I know it’s the right thing to do. I want to be with her. Harley would want it.”
Until recently, Jason regarded Kathy as a perfect substitute mother, someone to help him raise his daughters. Plans for the wedding switched that perspective to one of companionship for him, of romance, of love, exposing guilt and regrets he had to deal with regarding his behavior during the last days of Harley’s life.
“You’ll be fine,” Andy said. “She’s a great woman and you’re right; Harley would want you to be with her.” Hugging his best friend, Andy pushed Jason gently toward the cottage.
The girls, Bea’s daughters included, were dressed in vintage dresses Maryanne had collected. They held bouquets of the same flowers adorning the chairs, the stems wrapped in white satin.
As the guests found places to sit, Jason and Dave joined the group, the men kissing their daughters, Dave turning to Bea and kissing her, too, meaning it.
Jason’s surprise for Kathy began; a guitarist, strumming an old Nat King Cole song, When I Fall in Love. It had special meaning for Kathy who’d claimed except for Laura, to never having been in love. The beautiful music brought tears to Jason’s eyes, both sad and happy. Joe opened the door for Kathy who came onto the porch on her mother’s arm, the guest gasping at her beauty, the song bringing tears to her eyes, too.
“Thank you, Jason,” she said as they reached for the other’s hand.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said, holding her hands, all his concern melting away.
“Tina made my dress,” she replied, proud.
“The dress is beautiful, too,” he said, smiling.
After a brief ceremony, a ne
ighbor, a retired minister, pronounced Kathy and Jason husband and wife. But before they could escape the limelight, the minister spoke again.
“There’s one more thing. Before you leave, Jason’s sister-in-law would like to say a few words.”
Surprised, Jason and Kathy looked over at Bea, who stood up from her chair. Glancing at her family, at Dave smiling, her daughters standing behind Kathy, and at Harley’s family, emotion welled up in Bea’s heart. I love you, Harley, she whispered.
“By now, you all know the story of how Kathy came into our lives. Before Harley left this earth, she sent me a letter for Kathy and Jason, with specific instructions to read it on their wedding day. Jason, Kathy, are you okay with this?”
Looking into Kathy’s eyes, Jason could see how moved she was, afraid to speak for fear of breaking down. She nodded, squeezing his hands. The girls moved closer to their father, holding on to each other, the anticipation of hearing their mother’s words both exciting and scary. Jason sought their approval too, and they nodded in unison.
“We’re okay with it,” he answered, trusting Harley that it would be something positive.
“Okay, here goes,” Bea said, unfolding the white paper.
“Dear Jason and Kathy,
I’ve written separate letters for you both, but this one is for Bea to read to you on your wedding day. It’s so exciting! I know you’re right for each other if you’ve made it this far. Just imagining where you are standing, I can see it in my mind’s eye. Hopefully, you’re in front of the cottage porch, a place I always said would be perfect for a wedding. I imagine Fran has it decorated with white flowers in old pots.
Closing my eyes, I picture my daughters surrounding the beautiful bride, lovely in their own right. I see my firstborn, Bennie, red hair her legacy from me framing her face like a halo. Angie, statuesque, those blue eyes she inherited from Jason shining. My Tina, oh, I wish I knew what you were wearing on this special day! I know it’s perfect. And little Devon, with patent leather Mary Jane’s. You’re all wonderful.
Handsome Jason in blue jeans and a crisp white shirt and tie, I’m getting goosebumps thinking about how you must look.” The guests laughed, watching Jason squirm good-naturedly. Bea continued. “I can’t imagine what Kathy would choose to wear on her wedding day, but I wonder if it would be something vintage. Tina would help her select the perfect dress.
Planning this in my head while I write, I feel like I’m there with you. I can see the chairs on Pop’s lawn adorned by flowers tied with white satin ribbon. Knowing Jason, there is some kind of music playing.
Oh, the relief that my family will be loved and cared for by a grand woman like Kathy! Ask Bea; I was attracted to Kathy the moment we met. I prayed that she would want to join our family. Keeping her in my heart no matter what, I believe she is perfect for Jason.
Love each other above all else. I love you both so much, I’m so sorry to have left too soon. But since it happened, Kathy is the perfect woman to take over, to help my family heal. Love her, support her, never allow anyone to speak a word against her. I’m asking my family to build a wall of protection around Kathy and Jason’s marriage.
Until we meet again,
Love,
Harley
~ The End ~
This has been
Perfect for Him
by
Suzanne Jenkins
First Chapter of Pam of Babylon
Volume I of the Pam of Babylon series
Jack Smith was thinking, I am the luckiest man alive. Sitting at a white-linen-covered table on the sidewalk outside of his favorite restaurant, he gazed at the perfect face of his mistress of nine months. This place was their place. They’d spent a rare night together, and in the early morning they could have a leisurely breakfast, enjoying the perfect weather of late May in New York.
“What do you have to do this weekend?” Jack asked, knowing this could be a dangerous topic. Sandra was sipping her coffee, head bowed but eyes on him. She slowly put her cup down and straightened up. He really wanted to know. He was interested in her life outside of where it meshed with his.
“After you leave, I’ll start getting ready for the week, and then I can relax tonight and tomorrow. Monday I’m having lunch at my sister’s in New Jersey. My schedule next week is fairly packed, so the more I can get done now, the easier it will be.” She thought of her messy apartment, the empty refrigerator, the pile of laundry, but didn’t mention it. Jack’s solution to it would be to say, pay someone to do those things for you so you can do what you want. Your time is worth more than what it would cost. “One thing I would really like to do is get back to that gallery on Houston and see if there isn’t a deal I can work out for the piece we saw last night.” She smiled at Jack and they nodded their heads, remembering the vibrant painting of the Riverside Gardens. It was so colorful, the yellows and reds and blues exaggerated, the flowers oversized. They loved it.
“You should have said something while we were there!” he said, smiling at her. She knew he would have bought it then and there for her. But she really wanted to buy it for herself. She knew it was wise to keep things like community property out of their relationship.
They ate the rest of their breakfast in silence. Soon, Jack would start fidgeting, pushing his chair back slightly, looking around him and fighting the urge to look at his watch. Their time together would be over for now. Sandra would try to beat him to the punch; it was easier for her to be in control of this aspect of their life. His schedule would dictate when they could see each other, but she could be in charge of when it would end. She hated those last minutes while they waited for the check to come, feeling like she was sitting in a vacuum. Today was a little different, maybe because of the night before. It was so special having the evening together and then spending the night with him. The hotel was the same one they always used. It was clean and comfortable and—impersonal. But she didn’t allow herself to think of it.
He suggested early on that they go to her apartment, but she didn’t know how long they would be together and didn’t want those associations in her home. It would be hard enough to end the relationship without memories of him permeating where she lived. No thank you. It would be bad enough having to see him at work every day. Besides, he was wealthy enough to afford a hotel, and she was worth it.
He would not have argued if he knew what she was thinking. On one hand, he was wondering what was taking so long to get the check, as he had a lot to do at home, but on the other he would miss her terribly. It took all the strength he had not to pout like a child when he was away from her. He thought of his home, close to the sea, the smell of salt air. He imagined the two of them sitting on the veranda overlooking the beach grass. But the face of his wife kept popping up on Sandra’s body, not allowing anyone to take her place, even in his thoughts.
She walked him to the subway, refusing to have him walk her home first. He often preferred the subway over taking a cab. She would shop on the way home and he had a long commute, over an hour to his home on Long Island. They walked arm in arm, a striking couple to look at. He mature, graying at the temples and in good shape for his age; she young, model thin and beautiful. Heads turned to look. Were they famous? The attention they got when they were out in public together pleased them and they became even more animated, laughing, standing up straighter, happiness radiating from them both.
On Broadway, another observer took note of the radiant couple. Jack’s sister-in-law, Marie waited in the Saturday-morning bagel line at H&H. She happened to be uptown because of having gone to the theatre the night before with her friend, Arthur, staying the night at his apartment. Marie stood with her mouth open, heat spreading through her body, shocked and furious. The man behind her tapped her on the shoulder; it was her turn already.
“Never mind, go ahead,” she said as she moved out of line. Her body turned toward her brother-in-law as his back and that of his companion continued down the street toward the subway. She inched along th
e pavement staying close to the storefronts, not wanting to be seen, but dying to see. When they reached the subway the woman, a girl really, didn’t go down the stairs with him. Marie found it incredible that Jack was going to take the subway. What the hell was that all about? The couple stood at the entrance to the stairs talking, his arm around her shoulder protectively. It was clear that they were a couple, not just work associates, not just friends.
Standing out of sight in a doorway, Marie could barely tolerate the physical sensations she was experiencing. Her entire body was vibrating. It was a combination of disgust, shock, and excitement. She had loved Jack as her brother. She was certain her sister, Pam had no idea her husband was cheating on her. Pam would have said something. Marie didn’t yet think of the implications this would have on her relationship with her sister. If she didn’t know, it would remain that way because Marie wasn’t going to tell her. She would confront Jack and insist he tell Pam. That was the only way. Let him do the dirty work. Her patience paid off; Jack took the girl into his arms. He didn’t look around first to see if they were being observed, although this was a neighborhood in which his relatives lived. Then they kissed. He kissed her passionately; she reached up and with her arms around him, kissed him back. They parted, reluctance obvious to all who looked upon them, intimacy flourishing in a public place. Jack went down the subway stairs, looking behind him and smiling. The young woman stood there smiling down at him, waiting to move away until he was out of sight.
Marie watched as the young woman, beautiful in a white sundress, turned her back to the stairs and starting walking up Broadway. Marie didn’t have all day to play detective, but she knew that for her sister’s sake, she would need to find out as much as she could about this person. So she followed her, supposing she was headed for home but having no way of knowing. She stayed about half a block behind her. Watching her from the back, she made mental notes: tall; slender (of course); long, dark hair. Marie thought the woman should be blonde, but that didn’t make any sense. She told herself to just keep walking. When they got to 80th Street, the woman crossed and went into Zabar’s. There was no way Marie was going in. She would wait outside for a few minutes. She didn’t have all day. If the woman was doing a big shopping trip, Marie would leave. She stood across Broadway watching, not wanting to miss it when she left the store. She looked up at the sky and could see blue between the buildings, sunlight peeking down from the east. It was going to be a beautiful weekend. Memorial Day was Monday. Marie was going to her sister’s house on Long Island for a picnic. She had been looking forward to it all month. Now this.
A Touch of Passion (boxed set romance bundle) Page 120
