by Aubrey Rose
Terrence suddenly groaned. “Damn! I was going to take you out tonight!”
Kira almost smiled at his change of mood and how he didn’t think he should have asked first before thinking she’d go out with him tonight. That was the way it was about their relationship; they took so many things for granted and now there were so many blurred lines – one of which Kira had already crossed when she’d had sex with Blake.
Now Kira wondered what Terrence would say if she actually told him what had really happened. She could only guess his reaction and it wouldn’t be pretty. She figured that Terrence was one of those type of guys that could be really cool on the surface but when they snapped...shit hit the fan really quickly. She shuddered inwardly and called herself all sorts of a coward from keeping the truth from Terrence just to save her own skin. What kind of person was she turning into? Terrence was right. She didn’t like the Kira she’d become either.
***
When Blake told his father about his decision not to return to England but to settle temporarily in New York, Blake had been surprised at the old man’s incredulity. What was so hard for his father to believe about Blake choosing to stay back in the U.S.? Yes it was a big change for him after staying so long in London but it wasn’t that much of a culture shock considering he’d been born here. In any case none of that even mattered. He knew the main reason why he wanted to stay.
“But what about your girlfriend, Eve?” his father had asked. “What did she feel about this sudden decision?”
His father’s curious inquiry made Blake recall the phone conversation he’d had with Eve several days ago. He’d hated to do it, finally breaking up with her over the phone and with so many thousand miles between them. She didn’t deserve that but he had to come straight with her. They’d been drawing apart since Blake’s mother died. At first Blake had believed it had to do with the grief of losing his mother after so many months as he’d helped her try to fight her illness. But now Blake knew that the simple fact was he hadn’t loved Eve and never could; not in the way a woman deserved to be loved by her man.
“She didn’t take it very well,” Blake said wryly, remembering the screaming match. Eve had started off pleading and saying she wouldn’t mind moving to America just to be with him; that they had a future together. But when Blake had stood his ground, she’d accused him of finding someone else to take her place and he was just using this as an excuse. Blake had repeatedly apologized and said he’d never wished to hurt her. The call had ended with the sound of her bursting into tears and Blake had felt like shit hanging up on her in that condition.
“But I think in the end she realized the fact that there’s nothing she could do about it and knowing her, it wouldn’t take her that long to move on,” Blake added. He felt sure he was right. Eve was beautiful and strong enough to find someone else to replace him and he was certain her pride had been hurt more than anything else.
Bretton Carter looked skeptical, but didn’t say much more than that he hoped Blake would like it here now that he’d decided to stay.
“I’ll be staying Dad, but not here,” Blake said slowly, and saw his father frown. “I’ve found a house and I’ll be moving out as soon as the sale’s concluded. I’m planning on moving out before the end of the month if that’s okay.”
This time his father’s expression was unreadable even as he said lightly, “That’s fine. I’m glad you’re settling in so quickly. I guess that means you’ve probably already found some way to start work.”
“Well, I’ve been considering my options and I could easily start up my own consulting firm,” Blake said, thinking about how much he already had saved up which meant he didn’t need to worry about being unemployed for now.
“My offer for you to come and work for me still stands,” his father piped in. “Even as an independent contract if you’d rather do it that way.”
Blake hesitated; he’d been about to blatantly refuse and then he thought about it. If he worked for his father, inside his company, he was sure to get closer to Kira. He’d see her every day. If he was lucky, he might get past that wall that had effectively shut him out after two weeks of trying to reach out to her.
“You know what Dad? I think this time I’ll take you up on it. When can I start?” Blake asked briskly, hoping he could conceal his cheerfulness.
For once his father did nothing to hide his look of surprise. “You mean you’d come and work for me?”
“Sure; I’ve thought it over and it doesn’t seem like a bad idea. I’ll get the chance to learn the American market before considering doing my own thing. Besides, I feel like I owe us this chance to work things out. I’ve been less than commendable in my behavior to you since I returned and this is my chance to make it up to you, show you I’m not a total disappointment.”
His father was staring at him, as if he wasn’t sure Blake was pulling his leg or not. After a few seconds he said, “There’s nothing to make up for, Blake. I let you down as a father and I take full responsibility for that. There are no excuses and this isn’t the time to start wishing things went differently. But I’m truly glad you want to make this effort of working hand in hand with me to make up for lost time. In any case I don’t blame you for anything; you’re young and brash but that’s normal. And I don’t want you to think you owe me a duty but if you insist, I’ll see what I can set up for you in terms of work. Report in on Monday; I’m sure I could find something where your skills will be appreciated.”
Blake nodded, glad he’d won his father over even as he winced thinking secretly about how this might not be a great idea. He was practically handing his father control over his career. But that was a sacrifice Blake was willing to make so long as he got what he wanted in the end.
Kira.
Chapter Nine
There was no way Blake could show his frustration when he found out what he had in mind about where he was to work wasn’t exactly in line with his father’s. Monday morning came and Blake found himself in Carter Software Enterprises which was located four floors below his father’s office in the Carter Chrome building. It was then Blake figured his father had somehow guessed his motives and was going to put up as many hurdles as possible to thwart Blake from his aim. One of those hurdles was good, old-fashioned hard work.
In the first week Blake barely even had time to step out of the well-appointed office he’d been allocated to. Even with him being Bretton Carter’s son it seemed he was expected to work harder than anyone else if his workload was anything to go by. He arrived to the office early and left late, never catching so much as a glimpse of Kira until Friday.
It was lunch time and Blake swore he wasn’t going to spend it cooped up in his office with only a ham sandwich brought up from the cafeteria. He threw on his jacket and stepped into the elevator intending to check out one of the classy looking restaurants he’d seen close to the office. The elevator paused on the sixth floor and a woman walked in. They were the only ones in the car and out of idle curiosity he glanced her way.
“Kira?” he said in surprise.
She turned sharply to face him, her eyes widening in recognition and – damn it, thought Blake – fear.
“Blake!” she gasped. “What are you doing here?”
He grinned. “I work here,” he said. He wasn’t sure what it was about her that made him feel like a teenager with his first crush. Even with her dressed in a prim dark suit and her hair done up in a tight bun, she was still the sexiest thing he’d ever seen especially with those bright brown eyes, button nose and soft pink-tinted lips. “Well, actually down in the new software department.”
She clapped a hand to her forehead. “What? How is that possible? Your father never even told me,” she groaned, looking dismayed beyond belief.
Blake’s smile froze but then he wondered what he’d been expecting; a warm welcome and a leap of joy? He didn’t know what it was about him that got her back up but he wasn’t going to let her give him the brush off this time.
***
Kira was about to have a panic attack. Seeing Blake again when she’d least expected it was making the elevator feel like a compressed box she needed to get out of immediately.
“Excuse me,” she mumbled, reaching out to stop the elevator on whatever floor they’d reached but Blake’s hand closed over hers on the buttons. His other hand came up to take her chin in a gentle grip.
There was a well-known glint in his smile she didn’t like. Already her knees were quaking finding herself this close to him. She cursed whatever fate had made her choose to take a file to the sixth floor before her lunch break instead of letting one of the other assistants do it.
“Don’t run away from me. Not this time,” he said softly, his eyes scanning her face and making Kira’s neck feel hot. He had eyes greyer than grey and she couldn’t help but sink in them. The sound of his voice got to her like it always did, making her heart beat triple-time. Handsome did not begin to describe the way he looked in his three-piece suit and his hair hanging loose over his forehead. He was nothing like those strait-laced and stuffy British stereotypes which she’d been expecting Blake Carter to be. Instead he’d turned out to be as red-blooded, sexy and gorgeous as any leading man she’d ever fantasized about. Seeing him face to face was enough to make her wonder how that one time could’ve happened. It seemed so long ago.
“Blake, this is neither the time nor place for this,” she blurted, slipping her hand from under his, glad that the elevator would soon reach its destination and she could make her escape.
His face seemed to brighten at her words. “So tell me the right time and place. Because I have to see you again, Kira. I’ve tried to give you time to sort this out.”
“I don’t need time!” she gritted out. “I just need you to leave me the hell alone.”
“Why? Because with me you discovered what it meant to be a woman, a real woman? Because of what we shared?” he asked angrily, hands gripping her shoulders. “Don’t you understand how special that was? How special it still is between us?”
“Well since we’re on the subject why don’t we go over exactly what we shared, Blake? It was sex, just sex,” she said coldly, glaring up at him. “We both have people in our lives who’ll be hurt if they found out how stupid we’ve been.”
“I don’t,” Blake said promptly. “I broke up with Eve soon after the party. It was the logical thing to do. I wanted nothing standing between us once you were ready to give this thing we have a chance.”
“We have nothing, Blake which means you shouldn’t have bothered ending things with Eve,” Kira replied. “Don’t you get it? I mean come on. Really, you and me? I guess I should be flattered that I’ve caught your fancy, but trust me, I’m not going to fall for the same trick twice. I’m fine being a one-time conquest so why don’t you take your logic and stuff it. You’re the last man I’d ever want to be with because you’ll only be a constant reminder of how low I sunk that night!”
Kira could see her words had chilled him but she didn’t care. She had a whole backlog of issues not just with herself but how she felt she was perceived by other people. She hated for Blake to think she was some easy lay he could now cash in on for more of the same.
“I mean seriously, what do want from me?” she added heatedly when he didn’t speak. “I’m supposed to what, oblige you since after all I was such an easy lay the first time right? Well sorry, Blake but my ‘obliging’ days are done with.”
Shaking her head with disgust at herself and him, Kira turned away with her chest heaving in anger. She truly couldn’t imagine why a man like him would be so fixated on someone like her. She knew she was nothing like the women he must’ve dated in the past. He was a son of a billionaire with the social standing that was way beyond anything Kira could lay claim to coming from where she did. Why was he still trying to make a fool of her by placing importance on something they both knew was a huge mistake?
“I’m sorry that’s how you feel,” Blake said expressionlessly, backing away from her to stand against the wall, shoving his hands in his pockets. “For what it’s worth I want you to know that what we shared was special for me and not just in terms of great sex. I guess I was stupid thinking we could make something more out of it. I really felt a connection with you. But I guess you’re right and I was wrong.”
The elevator finally came to a stop and Kira could only stare at him unable to respond or even move. The cold, detached look in his grey eyes made her shiver inside. The doors opened.
“Goodbye, Kira. I promise I’ll never bother you again.”
Kira watched mutely as he shrugged past her and strode calmly out of the elevator. She knew she should be overjoyed by his words, but as her eyes followed his easy stride out of the office building she couldn’t help the intense ache in her heart. She really wished she could believe what he said about things being real and there being a connection. But how could he say that? If he’d really felt that way he wouldn’t have let things happen so fast. How could he ever respect or value her when she couldn’t even do the same herself?
***
Blake was scowling as he unlocked the doors to the Aston Martin, the one luxury he’d allowed himself when it came to personal acquisitions. As he was jerking the door open he heard a female voice call his name. He swiveled round, his eyes expectant – only to close them briefly in disappointment at the sight of not Kira, but Brittany Manson.
“Blake honey! Thank heavens I caught you,” Brittany breathed, coming up to hug him. She kissed his cheek enthusiastically, wrapping him in her expensive smelling perfume.
“Hello Brittany,” he said dryly, concealing his irritation as he extricated himself. He wasn’t surprised to see her; he’d run into her several times since he began working at the Carter Group. Her father and his were business associates, and she was always showing up on some pretext that her father had sent her to discuss something on behalf of the Manson family holdings. On every occasion she always made a point of visiting Blake’s personal office, obviously trying to wiggle an offer of a date from him. So far he hadn’t been biting.
He thought of how women like Brittany had been his type a few times in the past and how he would have at least considered going out with her once or twice just to see how things went. But since Kira, he had no interest in other women.
“Hey! So are you off somewhere? Lunch maybe?” Brittany said in her breathy voice, interrupting his thoughts.
Blake sighed. This was where he’d have to wipe the smile off her pretty Barbie doll face. He’d put too much effort trying to rein in what he truly thought of her and maybe it was time he came clean so she’d know there was no chance for them. But just then from the corner of his eye Blake caught a glimpse of Kira exiting the office building. He saw her headed their way and he could tell she’d already noticed him with Brittany.
His demeanor changed instantly. “Why yes, Brittany,” he drawled with a charming smile. “I hope I can convince you into joining me for a quick lunch? Do you know of any great restaurants in the area?”
Brittany almost swooned as he turned on the full wattage of his grin, his hand taking her elbow gallantly. Just beyond Brittany’s shoulder he saw Kira stop short and stare at them wide-eyed. Blake swore he caught a look of dismay on her face as she viewed them.
“I wouldn’t dream of refusing, trust me,” Brittany cooed, turning into full flirt mode. Blake nodded, grin widening in approval before he opened the front passenger seat with a flourish. Brittany slid inside elegantly and he closed the door after her. He went over into his side, slipping on his designer dark shades and sending Brittany one more flirtatious smile before switching the car into gear and zooming off smoothly.
He wasn’t smiling though as he glanced in the side mirror and saw Kira still standing there in the middle of the sidewalk, frozen as a sculpture, her face pale and tight.
Damn you Kira, he thought while stamping down any feeling of remorse. After the savage way she’d cut him down in the elevator, w
hy should he care anything about her feelings?
He may have been over the top with the scene at the car with Brittany and he must be crazy thinking it made any difference to Kira. She’d made it plain she wanted nothing more to do with him. Not only that, she had made their one time together sound so dirty it had ruined any chance of a future for them. He didn’t get why she could have such views considering this day and age, but then considering she’d been a virgin he wasn’t really surprised. She wouldn’t know how much he wished he could have made it more special for her, being her first time and it ate him up each day knowing she hated herself for losing control.
She’d never know how much it was the same for him, how he was the last person who’d ever have acted in such a manner, turning into some kind of sex predator, seducing a young innocent woman.
The more he thought about it, the darker his mood became. By the time they arrived at the restaurant he was a far cry from the charming Blake from earlier and Brittany was taken aback as his responses grew more monotone as their meal progressed. She tried engaging him in conversation by asking him how he liked the New York environment and the arts and social scene compared to his former life in London. It was all Blake could do not to snap at her as he inwardly brooded about his next step concerning Kira.
He was obviously not going to get anywhere with her. For one thing she had the hang-up about their racial and social differences. And then she’d brought up the fact that he wouldn’t have rushed into sex if he’d really wanted something more worthwhile with her.
The only option he saw was finding a way to get Kira out of his system even as he knew that would be one impossible thing to do. She was already his burning obsession.
In the meantime, he was thinking what a grave mistake it had been on his part bringing Brittany to lunch. He questioned her motives as he wasn’t sure she had any real feelings for him, but was simply interested in what she might believe was a profitable match for them both. Blake didn’t want to judge her too harshly but she did seem the type who did things only for what she could get out of it. She also probably looked down with disdain at anyone she considered not lucky enough to be as rich as she was.
