by Aubrey Rose
Slowly, he lifted his head. “What’s okay?”
Her lips twisted. “I’m not the kind to beat around the bush, so I’ll just say it as it is. It’s okay that you said something you might not have meant. I get it, Mykolas.” She forced a smile. “You didn’t mean it when you called me ‘my love’, and it’s cool.”
Mykolas only spoke when he was done cleaning her and was back on his feet. “I never thought I’d say this, but...” He kissed her softly on the lips. “I’d rather you call me an ‘asshole’.”
Velvet blinked, then a laugh escaped her as the tension in the air noticeably lessened. She said obediently, “Asshole. You motherfucking goddamn asshole.”
“That was a little bit more than I asked for, agape mou,” Mykolas asked with a wince as he helped her down the counter.
“Consider it a bonus,” she replied promptly.
She and Mykolas were both quiet as they stepped out, the two of them busy with their thoughts that they were completely oblivious to the line of gaping women queuing to use the ladies’. When they reached their seats by the bar, Mykolas ordered a drink right away. Velvet took her phone out, checking for incoming mail or messages, but it was really to distract herself from the fact that she was a BIG FAT LIAR.
She was cool with Mykolas Sallis not meaning to call her his love?
Like she said, big fat—-
The breath was knocked out of her, and the rest of her thoughts completely disappeared when she realized the unread email in her inbox was from her lawyer, Lester Wilkins. He was a dear old man, having taken her on pro bono when she was eighteen and without a clue as to what to do with her life.
I have received a letter from Mr. Garfield, forwarded by his lawyer. I have, of course, reviewed the contents and it is my professional opinion – as well as that of a surrogate father to you – that you do not bother with it. But of course, it is still your right to read it if you wish, and I have scanned the content in the event that you prove stubborn and disregard my advice.
Velvet would have smiled if she could. Lester Wilkins was a cranky old man, and most of his pro bono clients tended to back out after just one hour spent in his office. But she hadn’t, and in the end, she had gained herself an invaluable ally.
Mr. Wilkins knew her very well. She was stubborn. She really didn’t have a choice. That had been the only option that allowed her to survive.
Velvet clicked the attached file to open it.
I swear this is the last time, Dotty. I need money—-
The words shoved her back to the past. She was eighteen, and Wayne had shown up in her dorm, clearly out of it. He had woken up everyone on her floor with all his heavy knocks and loud cries. He hadn’t cared that everyone would know she had druggies for parents, and that they loved their green goddess more than they loved their own flesh and blood.
My friend Ernie told me about this excellent opportunity to make good and fast money. After this, I won’t ask you again. Never.
She was twenty and had thought the world was hers to conquer because Wayne and Lindy had successfully completed rehab. Velvet had thought they would be a family again. But the day they came out, they had borrowed money from her for one last joint. One last joint, Wayne had told her in a singsong voice. Please understand Mom and Dad. We need to do this. That was when she realized Wayne, Lindy, and the green goddess had always been a family – and she would never be a part of it.
You’ve done so much for me and your mom. If you want to meet with us anytime, you know we’re here for you. We love you very much, baby. We really want to see you.
Velvet remembered the first time she had refused to give them money and Wayne had gone berserk. Had slapped her so hard he had knocked her down. And Lindy was no better, urging her husband to knock more sense into their ungrateful brat. Didn’t Dotty know how close she had been to getting an abortion? Velvet owed them her life. Maybe she needed a couple more hard slaps to remember that.
I promise nothing’s going to happen to you this time. No one’s gonna hurt you again. And you know, I keep telling you it was a misunderstanding. I told her to insist that you lend her money. I didn’t tell her to rob you or threaten to kill you.
That was Wayne’s version. Velvet’s version wasn’t as rose-colored. He had sent his girlfriend – one of the many Lindy didn’t know about – to Velvet’s flat, and the older girl had been accompanied by teenage boys who were also desperate to do anything just to snort more cocaine into their systems.
It had been the worst night of Velvet’s life. Worse than the first time she had heard gunshots and realized her home was no longer a safe haven. At least when she was eighteen, when the bad men came, Velvet knew she had her parents on her side. That it was them versus the bad men who demanded blood or money.
But that night when she opened to the door to Wayne’s girlfriend? Her parents were the bad men, and they might as well have been there when the older girl threatened to give Velvet to the boys if she didn’t hand over all the money she had in her possession. Her parents might as well have been the one to hold the knife to her throat, might as well have been the one to terrify Velvet so much that she had jumped out of the third story window in an all-or-nothing attempt to escape.
You gotta put that behind in the past. It’s not good to hate.
He was so fucking wrong. Even with her name changed, her identity held a secret as ordered by the court, she could never – would never – escape the past. It was with her all the time, coloring her judgment.
The past was what she thought about every time she scrimped and saved every penny of her salary, the fear of being helpless and alone like she had been at eighteen making Velvet fanatic about building a nest egg for herself.
The past was what made her hold a small part to herself, just so Velvet could be sure she would not be completely reliant on anyone – not even with Mandy or Mairi or even Mykolas – and risk having her heart broken when the people she trusted failed her. Again and again.
Your loving dad,
Wayne
Velvet closed her eyes.
Weak is a dick, weak is a dick, weak is a dick.
How so fucking easy it was for Wayne to call himself her loving dad. And how fucking funny was it that those three words made everything so clear.
Of course Mykolas Sallis had not meant it when he called her his love. How could she expect someone like him to love her when even her own dad thought a gram of marijuana was more important than her life?
No matter what she did, no matter how much she had changed, she was not really Velvet Lambert. She was Dotty Garfield, and she had to remember that so she wouldn’t end up believing she could have her own happy ever after.
Chapter Nine
Mykolas was restless. Something had happened last night, something that had changed Velvet. When they had gotten home, she had pretended to have a headache. And this morning, she had pretended to be asleep. It was clear that she did not want to talk to him, and he had no fucking idea why.
Or did he?
Color stained Mykolas’ high-boned cheeks as he recalled the time he had taken her at the ladies’ room and he had called her something he had never called any woman before.
My love.
He leaned back on his seat and closed his eyes wearily. Goddammit, why did he end up saying those words anyway? And why did she have to make such a huge deal out of it? She hadn’t batted an eyelash even when he called her the same thing in Greek. So why now?
Besides, he was marrying her tomorrow. What more could she ask for?
But still the feeling persisted. He was not in the habit of leaving the office early, but he found himself curtly informing his secretary to cancel all his meetings for the day and driving back home at ten in the morning.
Damn you, Velvet, Mykolas thought even as he overtook another car in his haste to get back. He had a fucking feeling that if he didn’t get back as soon as he could, the worst kind of shit would hit the fan.
And he was
right.
****
Velvet counted ten full minutes since Mykolas left before she got out of bed. Leaving herself no time to think, she moved as quickly as she could as she took a shower and began packing her things. She might not have a job now, but at least she had enough money saved to tide her over until she figured things out.
Memories crowded her as she went through each room of Mykolas’ penthouse residence, which was really more like a one-floor mansion. A single floor that was probably the size of a basketball court –bleachers included.
The spacious kitchen with its gleaming granite countertops and shiny silver equipment, rarely used until she had come to live with Mykolas. Now, it was one of the most used rooms in the house because Mykolas liked having her as breakfast before the actual thing.
The balcony, with its marble balustrade, was where she and Mykolas sometimes had coffee before he left for work and if she was in the mood to tease him, where she would insist on giving him a blowjob because she knew that only with her was he amenable to risking what he considered as exhibitionist sex.
And there was the library. There, he would work at night after dinner, and she would be with him reading a book. Sometimes, she would get him to talk and other times he would get her to talk. They never went all out with their confidences, but it was easy to read between the lines when you loved the other person so much.
But it was not the same for him.
She had to remember that.
Their bedroom – no, his bedroom – had the most memories, and each one of them hurt. Sure, they had fantastic sex here all the time, but it wasn’t just that. She loved the after-sex part even more, the times when he would want her close and they would just talk. When he was tired, she would try to make him smile by telling him of her outrageous plans about what she would buy once she became Mrs. Sallis. His hard body rocking with his silent laughter would be her first reward, the second of course was having Mykolas go down on her.
It was here in this bedroom that he had also given Velvet her engagement ring, the first morning she had spent on his bed. She had woken up with a beautiful ring on her finger, with Mykolas cheerfully telling her he had bought the most audacious and gaudiest ring he could find.
This way, he had told her in a mock serious voice, you can make every woman envious when you tell them you only had to flutter your lashes to get me to buy the biggest rock in town.
Velvet blinked her eyes furiously. They were good memories, but she couldn’t hope it would be like that forever. She had to leave now before she lost herself in her dreams and made herself vulnerable again.
Velvet was in the act of dragging her suitcase down the stairs when she heard the door being unlocked. Her heart jumped to her throat when it started to open. For a moment, she felt like she was about to face intruders again, and she was all alone to defend herself.
But it was only Mykolas.
She almost breathed a sigh of relief when the thought hit her.
Oh my God, it was Mykolas! What was he doing here?
Velvet was so stunned that she dropped her suitcase, and she screamed bloody murder when it fell on her foot. As usual, Mykolas moved lightning fast in such situations, and Velvet found herself being swooped up in his arms as he carried her to the sofa.
Down on one knee, he gently took off one ballet flat and lifted her foot for inspection. “This will likely take a day or two to heal.” Looking up, Mykolas was indifferent when he saw Velvet’s teeth clenched with pain. “Do you think what happened to you is fate’s way of punishing you for trying to leave me?”
She glared at him. “Asshole.”
Normally, that would have made him smile, but this time Mykolas’ face only hardened. “Why are you leaving me? And why like this?”
“None of your fucking business.” And that was all she was going to say about it, Velvet thought, lips clamping shut and her gaze resolutely fixed on the gold-stenciled decoration of the wallpaper behind Mykolas. Whatever happened, she mustn’t look at Mykolas. If she did, it would be all over. Completely over.
“What are you doing here so early anyway?” she muttered as the silence between them grew and became heavier with tension.
He asked sarcastically, “I apologize for not asking what time I’m allowed to be in my house. Is it too terribly inconvenient for you?”
She snapped back, “Kinda!”
Losing his patience, he forced Velvet to meet his gaze. “No more games! Why are you leaving me? Have I treated you so badly in any way that you have no choice but to leave?”
Goddamn him, Velvet thought as she tried her best to stop a furious rush of tears. If he had made it seem like it was her fault then she would have known what to say, could have taken the offensive because he was being an ass. But he hadn’t. He was asking what he had done when in truth, it was all her.
Mykolas cursed when Velvet only glared at him, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears. “You are so fucking stubborn. I don’t even know why I put up—-”
“Then don’t,” Velvet shouted before she could stop herself. Oh my God, she was turning into a shrew right before her very eyes. If she had any ounce of pride and dignity left, she would leave right now before it got worse and she said more stuff that shouldn’t be said.
But Mykolas only shook his head at her. “You are not making any damn sense—-”
“I’m leaving you, and that’s it!” The words left both of them shell-shocked.
Mykolas’ face had whitened. Hearing the words said so clearly brought the truth home. He tried imagining Velvet out of his life, but everything was dark and pointless. “Why the fuck are you doing this to me, Velvet?”
She shook her head. “I just have to leave.”
“That’s not an answer.”
Tears started to fall down her face, and she struggled not to drown under all the emotions crashing down on her. “I just have to leave—-”
“Answer me, damn you!”
“Because I have to! Before you make me weak, I have to go!” The emotional dam had burst, and now she just couldn’t stop spilling her heart out. “Tell me, Mykolas. Tell me the truth! Why do you want to marry me so quickly? Why?”
Mykolas was aghast at Velvet’s sudden outburst. Her eyes were wild, her voice choked with tears. She looked like she was about to crash any moment. “Calm down—-” He tried to hold her, but she slapped his hand away. She tried pushing him off balance, too, but he was too strong and her tears had weakened her.
“You can’t answer me, can you?” she snarled. “You can’t...or you don’t!”
Again, he tried to hold her and again she struggled like a wildcat, trying to kick him away this time but ending up hurting herself as she forgot about her injury. “Shit!” She sobbed in pain, and stupidly or not she blamed Mykolas for it, too.
Mykolas finally managed to hold her down, keeping her arms to the sides so she would stop trying to beat him. “Will you please calm the fuck down? You’re worrying me, dammit!”
“Well, you’re killing me! Why don’t you ask me the same question? Why?” She glared at him even as more tears fell from her eyes. “Don’t you want to know why I’m in such a hurry to marry you? Don’t you want to know why I just asked one hundred damn grand when I know you can afford to give me a billion? ASK ME,” she shouted.
“Why then?” he shouted back. “Why—-”
“Because I love you!”
All the strength went out of her as the words spilled past her lips. She looked at Mykolas, and her chest squeezed so hard it was as if she was about to have a heart attack. But of course it wasn’t that. It was only because she loved him so much.
“I didn’t want to. You scare me, Mykolas Sallis. You scare me when I’ve worked so hard not to be scared. I’ve fought so hard to be strong, but you make me weak. You made me fall for you, and you made me lie. You made me name a price when there wasn’t any price at all for me to marry you because...I love you.” She struggled to breathe, struggled to get the las
t words out so her humiliation would be complete and with it, closure and perhaps a chance to move on. “I love you so much, Mykolas,” she whispered. “Love you so much that I wanted you tied to me before you realize the truth and think I’m lying—-”
“Stop.”
And as if that was not enough, he hauled her to him, his lips crushing hers in a kiss. She tried to struggle at first, but this only made him kiss her more deeply, tongue diving aggressively into her mouth so he could remind her that she was his.
Terror – sheer fucking terror – was growing inside him like a damn infection, but he forced himself to ignore it. Forced himself to play deaf to all the cynical warnings his past was now blasting out at him. He believed her. He believed every word she said, and that was the terrifying part of it. If he allowed himself to believe, then he would be risking everything of him – like she was risking everything of her to love him.
“You are so fucking stubborn,” he said hoarsely against her lips. “I’m sure your brain’s told you a thousand times that letting me know you love me is the worst decision you’d ever make.” He lifted his head, and his lips formed a smile when he saw her glaring at him. “But you ignored your own advice.”
She snarled, “What’s the point of this?”
“The point, my love—-” And he had to kiss her again when fresh tears stung her eyes at his words. Goddammit. A woman like Velvet wasn’t supposed to cry like this, and he hated the fact that he was the cause of it, hated how he had made her feel like she didn’t deserve to hear him say those words.
“—-is I’m damn stubborn, too. Because right now, the sensible part of me is telling I’d be taking a lot less risk if I toss you out of the house in favor of a bride who’d just ask me for a billion dollars.” He cupped her face and said unevenly, “A billion I can afford to lose and earn back. But my heart?”
A sob escaped Velvet. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Oh God, was this true? Was this really happening?
