by Gerri Hill
Lindsey’s T-shirt followed his, and she caught the rope as it swung back to the deck. Hannah wondered if this was a ritual for getting into the river or if it would be allowed to just walk in. Her gaze followed Lindsey as she mimicked Jack, yelling out before she hit the water. Hannah stood there, a smile on her face as Lindsey playfully chased after Jack. His swimming skills had definitely improved since last summer, and she knew she had Lindsey to thank for that.
Feeling quite relaxed and, dare she say happy…she pulled her tank top over her head and dropped it on top of Lindsey’s shirt. She caught the gently swaying rope and pulled it back, taking a few running steps before swinging out over the water as they had done. She did, however, contain a scream as she fell into the river. When she surfaced, Lindsey had already pushed the fanny floater over toward her, and she took only a few strokes to reach it.
“This is absolutely wonderful,” she said as she settled in. With the fanny floater, only her upper torso was above water. Much cooler than being on top of the water in a tube.
“When do you have to get back?”
Hannah sighed. “We’re supposed to be at Margie’s by three,” she said. “But I still have to make a dish.”
Lindsey nodded. “What kind of party?”
“Margie said barbecue. Dennis likes to do briskets, so I’m sure he’s had his smoker going since early this morning. There’ll be some aunts and uncles there.”
“Do we have to go?” Jack whined.
She splashed water in his direction. “You know we do.”
“Do you get along with Dennis?”
She nodded. “Better than Margie,” she admitted. “Dennis is pretty laid back, which is shocking considering his mother.” She smiled. “Margie could be Lilly’s daughter. That’s how similar they are.”
“I take it your husband was more like his father.”
“Yes. If James had been anything like his mother, we would have never gotten married.” At Lindsey’s raised eyebrows, she continued. “We met in college and got married about a year before we graduated. Jack came along three years later.”
“Stay-at-home mom?”
“Schoolteacher by trade,” she explained. “I taught until he was born, then stayed home. I was actually contemplating going back when…when James got sick.” She looked over at Lindsey, aware that Jack was listening to their conversation. “I may still go back. Depends on how things work out here. My plan right now is to volunteer, either at the library or the elementary school.”
“Got cabin fever?” Lindsey guessed.
“Well…not so much right now,” she said with a laugh as she dangled her hands in the water. “Last week I was going stir-crazy.”
“When do I have to go back to school?” Jack asked.
“Not until the third week of August. There’s still plenty of summer left,” she told him, even though July was right around the corner. In fact, the Fourth was only nine days away. She was about to ask Lindsey what she normally did on the holiday, but she kept her question to herself. No doubt it involved her family and she didn’t want to upset her.
“Maybe the next time, we could do a float trip,” Lindsey said.
“Like you said y’all used to do?” Jack asked solemnly.
“Yeah.” She glanced over at Hannah. “You game?”
“Sure. What do you do?”
“We’ll take tubes upstream in the Mule.” She smiled. “A cooler of beer and some snacks too. Then we’ll float back down here. Takes a couple of hours. It’s a lazy trip,” she said. “There’s one spot where it’s pretty shallow. That’s where we normally got out and had lunch. And played in the rapids.”
Hannah noticed the reflective look on Lindsey’s face and knew that she was mentally going back to that time and place when her family was still alive. She wished Lindsey would talk to her about it. She wished she could better understand the magnitude of what Lindsey felt. She tried to imagine what it would be like to lose her parents, her sister…the kids. She couldn’t even fathom it.
“Can we go tomorrow?” Jack asked excitedly.
“If you want to,” Lindsey said.
“If you don’t set some ground rules,” Hannah warned, “he’ll want to be over here every day.”
“And I wouldn’t mind in the least,” Lindsey said easily. “I’ll do sandwiches again.”
“Can we, Mom?”
Hannah looked between the two of them, seeing almost identical expressions on their faces. How could she possibly deny those looks? So, she smiled and nodded.
“Sounds like fun.”
“Yay!”
Chapter Twenty-Five
“Fishing?”
“Uh-huh. And I caught four!”
Margie’s question was directed at her, not Jack. “And where did you go? To the creek?”
“We…we went to the river,” she said with a smile. “Lindsey took us.”
Margie’s brow furrowed. “Lindsey McDermott? I thought you—”
“She’s very nice,” Hannah interrupted her. “Jack, take these out to the table for me, please,” she said, giving him the plate of deviled eggs. By the time they’d gotten back from their swim she simply hadn’t the energy to whip up a side dish for dinner. As soon as Jack was out of sight, Margie turned to her.
“Hannah…really,” she said. “I told you, the McDermotts are nothing but trouble. I thought you were going to put an end to this? Especially after Jack ran away.”
She held her hand up. “He did not run away,” she said. “I’ve spent some time with her. Like I said, she’s very nice. We’re…we’re becoming friends.”
“With a McDermott?” She gave a condescending laugh. “That will never happen.”
“Look, whatever issues you have with the McDermotts, they’re not my issues,” she said pointedly. “She’s only a few years younger than I am and Jack simply adores her.”
“She’s a stranger, Hannah. You know nothing about her. Why, she could—”
“Margie, it’s fine. She’s no longer a stranger. In fact, we had dinner with her the other night.” As soon as she said the words, she wanted to take them back.
“Dinner?” Margie’s lips pursed. “Yet you can’t find the time to join us for dinner?”
“It was…well, an impromptu dinner,” she said lamely, thankful that Jack had come back inside.
Margie eyed her, changing the subject. “You’ve gotten some sun. Are you finally through rearranging Lilly’s house?”
She nodded. “The last thing was the kitchen. You’ve seen it since I’ve finished painting, so…”
“Yes. Lilly would hate that color.”
Hannah silently groaned as she flicked her eyes at Jack. The teasing face he made at her reminded her so much of James that she almost started laughing. She had to turn away from Margie to hide her smile.
“Is there something else we can help you with?”
“You can take the pitcher of tea out if you like.”
“I’d be happy to,” she said quickly, willing to do anything to get away from her.
She sat in a lawn chair outside…close enough to the group to be sociable yet far enough away to have her own space. Jack was playing with two boys, both younger than he was. The family gathered today was mostly from Margie’s side and Hannah didn’t know them. A few, she’d seen at the funeral, but she didn’t recall speaking with them. The only two she knew were Dennis’s sister Darlene and her husband. She’d visited with them earlier in the summer when their son, Nathan and his family had come down. Nathan—James’s cousin—and his two bratty boys who had picked on Jack, she reminded herself.
Oh, well. It was good that Jack was being exposed to James’s family a little more. These cousins just lived over in Vanderpool, east of Utopia. And even though Jack seemed to be having fun, he’d met her eyes a few times. She wondered if he, like her, wished they were back at their own house. Most likely, he was wishing he was in the river with Lindsey. She had to admit, she wished she was too. It
wasn’t blistering hot, not like it would be in July and August, but she would still prefer the cool, clear water of the Frio River to this. She smiled to herself. Or maybe it was Lindsey’s company that she would prefer.
* * *
Barney jumped all over Jack as if they’d been gone for days instead of hours. She laughed as Barney finally got the best of Jack, knocking him down on the kitchen floor.
“I told you we should have taken him along,” Jack said as he ruffled Barney’s fur.
“And I told you your grandmother would have had a stroke.”
He got up and went to the fridge, staring inside. “Can I have a Coke?”
She was about to say no, it was late, but she spied the wine bottle on the counter, the one she’d opened two nights ago. She wouldn’t mind relaxing with a glass. He looked at her thoughtfully and she nodded. She handed him a glass and he added ice, then popped the top on the can, pouring the Coke and watching as it fizzed, nearly spilling over. She pulled the cork out of the wine and filled a wineglass, then put the bottle back.
“What do you think Lindsey did tonight?” Jack asked as he took a swallow of his Coke.
“I don’t know.”
“You think she cooks dinner just for herself?”
Hannah stared at him, wondering at his questions. Was he worried about her?
“We should ask her over here for dinner,” he continued. “You could make that triple-cheese hamburger casserole! I bet she’d like that!”
“I just made that. You’ll have to wait at least a month before you get that again.”
“What about spaghetti?”
“We had that not too long ago too,” she reminded him.
“I love spaghetti and meatballs.”
“Yes, I know you do.”
“So?”
“So, what?”
“Can we?”
She sipped from her wine. “Can we invite her over or can we have spaghetti and meatballs?”
He grinned. “Both.”
“How can you even think about food? I saw how much you put on your plate.”
“Paw Paw Dennis gave me an extra rib too.” He leaned against the counter, much like she was doing. “So? Can we?”
She studied him. “Are you worried about her?” she asked quietly.
He shrugged but said nothing.
“Does she help you not miss your dad so much?” she asked gently.
He nodded.
“And you help her not miss her nephews so much?”
He nodded again. “That’s okay, isn’t it?”
“Of course, honey. I’m sorry that I didn’t understand before. I’m sorry that I tried to keep you apart.”
She was surprised to see a tear in his eye, and he wiped it away. “So?” he asked again. “Can we?”
She smiled. “Sure. If she wants to.”
He grinned. “She will.” His smiled faded. “She probably gets lonely over there by herself.”
Hannah nodded. She knew all about loneliness.
“You like her, don’t you?”
She smiled at him. “Yes. Were you worried I wouldn’t?”
He made a face. “Grandma Margie doesn’t like her,” he reminded her.
“Grandma Margie doesn’t like her for no other reason than her last name.”
“But why?”
“I don’t know, honey. She’s only repeating what Great-grandma Lilly has told her.” She touched his head affectionately. “You don’t need to worry about it. I’m not going to let Grandma Margie dictate who we make friends with.”
He took a big sip of his Coke. “I can’t wait for tomorrow,” he said. “It’s going to be so much fun.”
With that, he left her alone in the kitchen, Barney following him back to his room.
“Bring your glass back before bed,” she called after him.
Instead of finishing her wine where she stood, she went out to the back porch. It was a warm evening but still comfortable. Unlike Lindsey’s deck, where ceiling fans turned to stir the air, there was nothing fancy about this small porch. She sat in one of the old rockers and she wondered how often Lilly had sat in it over the years. Her gaze was drawn toward the woods and the creek. Had Lilly sat here, keeping a watch for those “hoodlum” McDermotts?
She shook her head. Margie was sure adamant that they stay away from Lindsey McDermott. She knew it was only based on stories Lilly had told her over the years. Margie and Dennis had been married for over thirty-five years and had lived out here all of that time. She imagined Lilly had filled her head from the start.
It didn’t matter. As she’d told Margie, Lindsey was nice. Normal. She felt like they were becoming friends. She hoped that was the case and that Lindsey felt the same way. Hannah suspected that Lindsey could use a friend, someone to talk to, someone other than Jack. She admitted she was very proud of Jack for understanding the reason that Lindsey had gravitated toward him. Of course, Jack had also been drawn to Lindsey. And Lindsey had kept him entertained, had taken him fishing, swimming. She knew now that their relationship was not one-sided, as she’d feared in the beginning. She smiled as she took a sip of wine. What she’d feared in the beginning was too embarrassing to even think about. She would never, ever tell Lindsey.
She let out a contented breath and pushed the rocker into motion. Yes, now she felt contentment. Early in the evening, not so much. Even though she’d wanted to leave the party as soon as they finished eating, she made herself stay a little longer, visiting with James’s uncle a little and also sitting in a circle with Margie and some of her friends, listening to the stories they told. Jack had grown tired of playing and had pulled a chair up close to her. They communicated silently, both telling the other that they were ready to go. When there was a lull in the conversation, she finally stood, saying they were going to head home. Her announcement was met with protests—leaving so early?—mostly from Margie, but Jack gave an exaggerated yawn and Hannah had said she better get him to bed. They’d laughed about it on the short drive through the woods to their house.
The truth was, they were both looking forward to their outing with Lindsey tomorrow. And even though Lindsey said she would make sandwiches for their lunch, Hannah wanted to contribute something more than cookies and chips. She knew there was a link of summer sausage in the freezer. She’d picked it up at the meat market in Concan a few weeks ago. She also had cheddar cheese. She would slice the cheese and sausage up and bring a jar of Margie’s dill pickles and some crackers. A perfect snack. Of course, she would also make cookies. Jack would feel slighted if she didn’t.
She drank the last swallow of wine, then got up. She took one last look into the dark woods, then glanced up into the sky. It was only then that she realized her thoughts hadn’t been filled with James. She also realized the heavy weight of sorrow—of loneliness—wasn’t nearly as prevalent as it usually was.
She wasn’t sure if that thought made her feel happy or sad.
Chapter Twenty-Six
“Oh, cool, Lindsey! You brought the four-wheeler down!”
“That I did.”
“Can I drive it?”
Lindsey looked quickly at Hannah. “Even I wouldn’t allow that,” she said with a grin. “But Jack, if your mom will let you, I’ll take you on a spin later.”
Jack immediately tugged on his mom’s arm. “Can I, Mom? Please?”
Hannah looked back at her. “Is it safe?”
Lindsey nodded. “Sure. I drive like a grandma,” she lied. She’d actually had fun on the ride down, spinning out at every turn she came to.
Floating the river required two vehicles, unless you wanted to trek back upstream to retrieve the Mule. And after a float trip with a couple of beers, hiking a few miles wasn’t at the top of her list. So, she and Max had gone out at daybreak and hiked to the pond. She wouldn’t have been surprised if the four-wheeler hadn’t started, but it took only a little coaxing on her part. She zipped it down to the river in no time.
“So can I?�
� Jack asked again.
“I suppose.”
“I’ll take you out too, if you like,” she offered to Hannah. “I’ll go slow. Promise.”
Hannah smiled. “We’ll see.”
They drove past the deck and four-wheeler, going upstream like they’d done yesterday morning for fishing. Jack pointed out the spot where they’d been, but she kept going, deciding to take the long float trip. It was a nice, sunny day…and already hot. They had sandwiches and snacks and a cooler of drinks. If they took the long trip, they could stop at the little rapids and play for a while. She thought Jack would like that.
She found the spot that her grandfather had carved out of the rocks. It was well shaded and she parked the Mule there. Jack scrambled out and let the dogs off the back. They headed directly to the river with Jack following.
“The river looks wider here,” Hannah noted.
“It is. Not quite as deep here, though,” she said. “There are some flat rocks on the side. Easy to get in.”
“Is this where…well, where you and your family would come?”
She nodded, smiling a little, glad the mention of her family didn’t bring her down. “Yeah. My grandfather made this little parking area here. This used to be a huge rock pile. He brought the tractor down and cleared out this middle section.” She took the cooler off the back. “We had two different put-in spots. This is the longer of the two. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Not at all.”
Jack walked back over with two dripping wet dogs. “How long will it take to float it?”
“Two or three hours. Can you make it?” She reached up to untie the tubes from the top of the Mule.
“Sure.”
“There’s a spot about halfway down, got some little rapids there. It’s a good place to stop for lunch. I’ll show you how to go through the rapids without a tube.”
His eyes widened. “Is it deep?”
“No, just rocky. But there’s a little chute. It’ll be fun.”
“Okay.” Then he looked at his mother for confirmation.
Hannah smiled at him. “If Lindsey thinks it’s okay, sure.”
They took their tubes to the water. Lindsey carried an extra one with a bottom—for the cooler. It was the same cooler that her dad had packed many times before, and the tube’s bottom and sides had been custom made—by her grandfather—to fit the cooler and hold all the accessories, including a spot for the picnic basket.
