He headed for the house but was arrested before he reached the steps by a snowball hitting him square between the shoulders.
Turning very slowly, he saw his daughter and Crystal Chambers, huddled together, eyes wide, watching and waiting to see what he would do.
With a comically outraged yelp, he rushed forward, bending down to scoop up snow to make his own missiles; the girls shrieked and ran, and he chased them.
He hadn’t had a snowball fight like this in – well, maybe he’d never had a snowball fight quite like this. He had vague memories of playing in the snow with other kids his age when he was young, but that didn’t even compare to seeing his daughter, red-faced and runny-nosed from the cold and from laughter, putting her whole heart, her whole self, into the play. And Crystal – Crystal was covered in snow and her hair was coming loose from its bonds, but she didn’t care. She was flushed with laughter herself, and as she ran away from Ernest, she never got too far but stayed just out of reach. A good match for him, he caught himself thinking – a good match for them both.
In the joy of playing with them, the unhappy awkwardness of the morning’s jaunt with his prospective bride was forgotten.
Chapter 8
Crystal woke with a start. Cheeks flaming in the darkness, she sat up in bed and stared very hard at the wall, which was faintly visible thanks to the light reflected from the snow outside. She folded her arms across her chest and tried to gather her thoughts.
The dream had been so real, so vivid – and so lovely that she hadn’t wanted it to stop…
But just the thought of it made her blush even harder. Ernest, walking with her in the snowy field, reaching out to take her hand and drawing her closer to him…
She closed her eyes tightly and shook her head. No, she shouldn’t even think of it. Of course, it had been her inner self that had put the dream into her head, but it still felt too much like a betrayal of her sister to think of standing in his close embrace, even of letting him kiss her. She put her head into her hands, feeling the warmth of her cheeks slowly fade as her breathing and heartbeat returned to normal.
This, she told herself sternly, would never do.
Of course, she had set herself up for it. All those daydreams about finding a handsome cowboy, everything she had indulged herself in when they were still living in Charleston, had led inevitably to this moment. But she would control herself. She had will power, and she was a very determined young woman. She wasn’t about to be ruled over by her wayward heart.
Still, the dream had been so real…
She flung back the covers and stepped out of bed. It must be very early, and no one could be up yet. She would steal downstairs and make herself a cup of tea.
She pulled her robe about herself, tying it securely, and pulled her loosely braided hair over her shoulder. She must look a fright – all she could hope was that no one would hear her and get up to see what was going on. Not to mention that she certainly didn’t want to awaken her sister.
Crystal tiptoed as silently as possible down the stairs and headed for the kitchen. Once there, she breathed a sigh of relief. It was at the far end of the house from the staircase and the bedrooms; surely, she was safe now.
She stirred up the fire; it had nearly died out, apart from the embers, which made her realize that it was later than she thought. It must only be a short while before dawn; she hadn’t long to herself before the rest of the house would be up and about.
She put the kettle on and took a seat at the kitchen table to contemplate the flames and try not to think about her dream.
The trouble was – well, the trouble was Mandy. Poor Mandy. It was obvious that she was having difficulties in settling here, whereas Crystal found it more comfortable than any place she had ever been. More than once in the last week or so, Crystal had found Mandy sitting in her room with her tippet in her lap, stroking the soft fur, lost in her thoughts. That was the real core of the problem – Mandy could not bring herself to love Ernest and Lina and Daphne because her heart was somewhere else, somewhere far away – somewhere that they didn’t even know.
Those few days on the train with Colin York had left a deep impact on her older sister. Mandy was always kind and thoughtful; but these days she seemed to be entirely wrapped up in herself and didn’t even seem to have much time for poor Lina.
And that was important. Lina, well, Lina deserved better. She deserved attention. Crystal had been thoroughly enjoying her time with the little girl, reading to her before bed every night, running around outside in the snow. And she loved having Lina help her and Daphne with the baking and the chores. Daphne was right; Lina had found other ways to communicate. And Crystal knew that each day, Lina was telling her that she loved her a little more.
That could not stand. Crystal could not be the mother to Lina when Mandy was to be the wife to Lina’s father.
But what could make it change?
She made her tea and stared deeply into the cup, sending a wordless request to God – a prayer for guidance, unknowing of how that guidance could come about.
“Is everything all right?”
The question was spoken low and hesitantly; Crystal started, looking up swiftly and finding her gaze drawn into that of Ernest. He stood just outside the door to the kitchen, poised to enter but hesitating until she answered. She felt a surge of joy somewhere deep within her and pushed it down ruthlessly. She had no business being so happy simply from seeing his face.
She cleared her throat. “Yes, of course. I just couldn’t sleep.”
“Hmm. Me, too. May I come in?”
She hesitated. But it was his kitchen, after all… even though the last thing she needed right now was to be one on one with him.
Did she have the strength to walk away?
Yes, she told herself decisively, she did.
She stood up.
“Please,” she said, “come and sit by the fire. The kettle’s still hot – tea will do you some good. I know it did me.” She made a big show of stretching and yawning, though by the look on his face he was not entirely convinced. “I feel as though I could lie down for another half an hour now, before it’s time to get up.”
“You haven’t even had any of your tea,” he pointed out.
“Yes – but the smell of it – just getting up – it all reminded me how tired I really am.” She was babbling, and she knew it. She moved past him as quickly as she could and out into the hallway. “I must close my eyes for just a little longer or I’ll be absolutely useless in the morning. Enjoy your tea, Ernest.”
“But…” he called after her, but she wasn’t waiting around to listen to his objections. It wouldn’t take much to convince her to go back and sit with him and talk comfortably as though they were old friends. She wanted nothing more than to be there in the kitchen, just with him, the two of them together as though…
….as though they were husband and wife.
Well, she told herself as she arrived back at her cold bedroom, at least she could feel good about her self-control.
Even though she felt absolutely terrible about everything else.
Chapter 9
Apart from the few sunny days shortly after the Chambers sisters had arrived in Pepper Gulch, the winter seemed to have returned with a vengeance. The following week, the beginning of February, was full of snow. It would come in each evening, snow enough to cover the mud, and melt away a little in the morning. It never seemed to accumulate more than a few feet, but that was enough, Ernest thought. He was sick of the winter. He was ready for the spring.
He was ready to move on.
If only he could figure out where he was meant to move on to.
Nothing seemed to be getting better with Mandy Chambers, though he gritted his teeth and continued to try. No matter what they spoke about, they ended up arguing. She hardly ever had a smile for him, and though she was obviously trying to be kinder to Lina, he could tell that her heart wasn’t in it.
There didn’t seem to b
e an answer to any of the conundrums that plagued him.
There finally came an evening where the snow was not coming down as it had been, and he took his post-supper coffee outside to enjoy the last of the weak light of day. Sitting on the porch, he found himself once again going over and over the problems of his life at the moment and getting stuck on the most important one: what would be best for Lina.
How was he supposed to know? he asked himself rhetorically. It wasn’t as though he’d ever been a father before her…
The door opened and he tensed a little, but it was only his mother.
He heaved a sigh.
“I’m glad it’s you,” he said. “The mood I’m in right now, I don’t know what I’d say to anyone else. I’m sure it wouldn’t be helpful.”
“Don’t be too hard on yourself, son,” said Daphne, settling herself comfortably into the seat next to him. She had her own cup of coffee, too. “I think you’ve been doing very well with everything, all things considered.”
“Do you? I don’t know that anyone else would say the same. I hear the questions every time I go into town – ‘Your Mail Order Bride’s here, isn’t she, Ernest? When can we expect the wedding?’”
Daphne snorted. “Don’t mind them, son, they just want an excuse to have cake. Besides, it’s February, and it’s been a long winter. Everyone’s simply desperate for entertainment.”
“That’s not what my wedding will be, though,” he said gloomily. “It will be – oh, it will be life-changing, won’t it? For myself, for Lina, for Mandy…”
“Yes,” said his mother and he looked up.
“You’re about to tell me something you think I don’t want to hear, aren’t you?”
“All I said was ‘yes’…”
“But it was the way you said it.” He rubbed his face with one hand and sighed. “Go ahead, Ma. I’m listening.”
“Well – it’s Mandy.”
He sighed again. “I know, Ma, I’m not doing right by her – we should be married already, and here we can barely have a conversation without jumping down each other’s throats. I should be trying harder…”
“Ernest, you say you’re listening, but it’s obviously not true. That’s not what I mean at all. I mean – Mandy is not the right woman for you, or for Lina, for that matter. You should not marry her.”
He dropped his hand into his lap and stared at her in disbelief. “Do you mean that?”
“Of course, I mean it. Do you think I’m in the habit of saying things I don’t mean?”
She certainly wasn’t. Daphne Flinn was a lot of things, but tactfully vague was not one of them.
“But, Ma, I agreed that I would marry her. We’re engaged. She came all the way out here to marry me.”
“I don’t see any contract signed in blood,” said Daphne tartly. “You have the money to make it right with her, you can buy her at ticket back east if she wants, or wherever she wants to go. You’re only committed once you say I do.”
Ernest shook his head.
“I don’t see it like that, Ma. That’s the trouble. I know we haven’t actually gotten married yet, but when she agreed to my proposal in the application – well, it’s not just something I can wipe off the slate.”
“Bosh,” said Daphne. “If you told that girl that she was free, she’d be out of here in a minute. Anyone with eyes can tell that she’s miserable. Now, I don’t know why, and I’m not going to speculate. But she doesn’t want to marry you anymore than you want to marry her.”
“And where does Lina fall into all this?’
“Lina shouldn’t have a mother who doesn’t want to be her mother.”
“But the reason I wrote for a Mail Order Bride was to help her.”
“And you’ve got someone who helps her,” said Daphne, eyeing him. “Can’t you see how Crystal and Lina have become so attached to each other? Why, that little girl hasn’t been this happy and content in years.”
Somehow, he had known what she was going to say.
“And the same goes for you, too,” she added.
He’d had a feeling that was coming, too. His worst fears were realized – his feelings for Crystal were obvious, no matter how hard he tried to hide them. He could feel his face get hot.
“Ma, I can’t just swap one bride out for another,” he said. “That’s – that’s just not how it works. Anyhow, it wasn’t Crystal that agreed to marry me. For all I know, she doesn’t even want to be married. I can’t just ask Mandy to step aside so I can marry her younger sister.”
“I don’t see why not.”
“It’s just not done, Ma.”
“Oh, well,” said Daphne, the word exaggerated. He could tell that she was rolling her eyes. “What does that matter, son, when it compares to your happiness?”
“I don’t know, Ma, but it does. It does.”
Daphne sniffed.
“I only want to see you both happy,” she said.
“I know. I know.”
Glancing over at her to smile, he thought he saw the flutter of the curtain in the window behind her. As though someone had been standing there, maybe even listening to the conversation.
But it was dark, he told himself. There was no way to be certain.
And it didn’t matter anyhow. If Mandy came up to him now, he would say the same thing that he had said to his mother. He’d made a commitment, and that was that. He had no interest in hiding his feelings from anyone.
Well – maybe from Crystal.
The thought of revealing his emotions toward her made him uncomfortable. And the thought of her leaving along with her sister was even worse. But there was nothing to be done about it – he had to make up his mind one way or another and bear the consequences.
Even if they broke his heart.
Chapter 10
The next day, it was back to snowing again, and Crystal and Lina kept their play inside. Daphne baked bread, Ernest whittled a toy for his daughter, and the house was full of warmth and cheer.
Mandy, meanwhile, was nowhere to be seen.
When she didn’t come down for breakfast, Crystal went up to her. Her sister was sitting beside the window, looking pensively out at the wintry world outside.
“Mandy? Are you all right?”
Her sister turned to her, managing a small smile.
“Yes, dear, of course – just – a headache, that’s all.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. Can I do anything? I’ve brought you some toast and tea.”
“Thank you, Crystal, that’s perfect. Is – is everyone downstairs?”
“Yes. We’re all in the kitchen, it’s nice and warm, perfect for a day like this. Will you come down?”
Mandy glanced back out the window.
“In a little while, I will. I promise.”
Crystal hesitated. It was clear that something wasn’t quite right, but she wasn’t sure that it was just a matter of Mandy having a headache. She kissed her sister gently on the forehead and went away, realizing that it was best to leave her to her own devices. Mandy always worried about things, and Crystal had never been able to take the worry away by talk or suggestions. Ever since their father had passed away and Mandy started to care for Crystal as though she were both parents, she had been like this.
They had changed locations, Crystal realized, but Mandy was still the same person.
Ernest spent some time with them that morning, watching Lina interact with Daphne and Crystal. Every time that she looked up, she caught his gaze on her; and even when she was involved with what she was doing, she could sense it all the same. Usually, the intensity of his regard made her blush; today, it led to simply a pleasant prickling on her skin, like the whisper of silk fabric drifting across her arms. Something seemed different between them, but she wasn’t sure what it was.
He finished whittling the toy for Lina – a small, cleverly jointed wooden fox for her doll to hold – and headed out to the barn to take care of the chores for the day, leaving the women inside. Lina and Crystal pla
yed with her doll and the new toy for a bit until Lina grew restless and tugged on Crystal’s sleeve, wanting to play outside.
“Are you sure?” Lina nodded, and Crystal glanced outside. “Well, I suppose the snow has slowed down quite a bit. We’d better make the most of it, I guess. Put on your boots.”
They bundled up and raced each other outside, where Lina immediately started to build a snowman. Crystal helped for a bit, spending more time staring absently in the direction of the barn, wondering whether Ernest was warm enough.
“Crystal!”
Her sister was calling her from the porch. Crystal glanced at Lina, who was very occupied with her building work, and trudged off through the snow to meet Mandy where she stood just outside the front door. They weren’t too far away from where Lina played, after all, Crystal reckoned; she could be away from her for a few minutes.
“Mandy? Is everything all right? How is your headache?”
“Oh, I’m much better, dear. I’ve just been thinking – and I’ve reached a decision.” She glanced back at the door behind her, and pulled Crystal to the edge of the veranda, stepping close to her and lowering her voice. “I don’t believe that this will come as a shock to you, after we’ve been here for so long, but – I’ve decided that coming here was a mistake.”
Crystal could feel her own eyes widen dramatically.
“What?”
“Yes – a mistake.” Mandy wrung her hands together, the familiar look of worry creasing her brow. “You said yourself that you worried we had made the decision to leave Charleston too quickly. Well, I think you were right. We should go back and try again.”
“But Mandy, you said yourself there was no work there.”
“Well – we can go somewhere else, then, if you’d rather. But we should leave, no matter what our destination.”
Mandy looked as though she was on the verge of tears. Crystal reached out and put a hand on her arm.
Her Sister's Wedding Page 5
