WIVES AND LOVERS
by
Margaret Millar
Syndicate Books
New York
Copyright © 1954 by Margaret Millar. Renewed 1980 by the Margaret Millar Charitable Unitrust.
This edition published in 2016 by
Syndicate Books
www.syndicatebooks.com
For Lydia and Don Freeman
1
In hot weather Hazel liked to sit in the dental chair. Its leather arms and back were cool and there was a fan in the ceiling above it. She loosened the belt of her uniform and leaned back, listening to the hum of the fan and thinking what a fine place it was to sit and realize that except for one bicuspid she didn’t have a filling in her head.
From the adjoining room she could hear sharp metallic sounds and the gurgling of water in a basin. Presently the gurgling stopped and Gordon Foster called, “Hazel?”
“Coming.”
She climbed out of the chair and, tightening her belt, followed Gordon’s voice into the lab. It was a shoebox of a room, with the ceiling pressed down on it like a lid, and Gordon and herself, two mis-mated shoes, tossed together into the box by a careless clerk.
“Did you want something?”
“No.”
“You called.”
“I thought you might have gone home.”
“It’s too hot to move. This is the hottest August I’ve ever experienced.” She said this each August, and many times each August, but it always seemed true. “Besides, I brought my lunch.”
Gordon looked up from the bridge he was repairing, his eyebrows raised. He didn’t talk much when he was working but he often asked silent questions with his brows: Why don’t you eat it, then?
“Thin people like you,” Hazel said, dabbing at the sweat that trickled down behind her ears, “don’t mind the heat so much.”
“You could eat your lunch out on the grass where it’s cooler.”
“I prefer to stay inside.”
“Oh.”
“The ants. It’s a bad year for ants.”
Hazel sat on a stool sipping a Coke and looking without appetite at the sandwich she had brought for lunch. Some of the starch that had gone out of her uniform and out of Hazel herself seemed to have found its way into the sandwich. The bread had curled at the edges and the peanut butter filling had dried and stiffened like buckram.
She held the cold bottle of Coke against her forehead for a moment. “Air conditioning would be nice.”
“I suppose it would.”
“Maybe next summer.”
He glanced at her questioningly—next summer? When is that?—then turned away with a sigh. Hazel was not sure whether the sigh meant that she was to be quiet or that next summer seemed a long sad year away.
“Dr. Foster—”
He shook his head. “Elaine says we can’t afford an air conditioner.” Elaine was his wife, and the final authority on office as well as personal expenditures.
“I know. I wasn’t going to talk any more about that.”
“Good.”
“I just wanted to say, well, the last few weeks you haven’t been yourself.”
He smiled. He had extraordinarily good teeth for a dentist. “Who have I been?”
“I mean it.” Hazel looked stubborn and unamused. “You’ve lost weight and your color’s not good. Those are bad signs in a man your age.”
He was thirty-eight, three years younger than Hazel, and sometimes Hazel felt like his mother and sometimes she felt like a mere sprite of a girl beside him. They were never contemporaries.
“Bad signs,” she repeated. “You ought to go through one of the clinics and get checked up.”
“And you ought to get married again, to some nice fellow who enjoys being fussed over.”
“You think I’m fussing?”
“Like an old hen.”
“I don’t usually.”
“No.”
“So I must have a good reason for doing it now.”
“The reason is, you’re a nice normal woman and you don’t feel alive unless you’re fussing over someone.”
“I’ve never heard you talk like this before. It just goes to show, things aren’t right.”
“No,” he said. “No, things aren’t right.”
She opened her mouth to speak again, but he had turned his back, and his white starched coat was like a blank whitewashed wall.
The buzzer sounded from the front door and Hazel went to answer it, moving heavily on her heat-swollen feet.
She said over her shoulder, “I could make an appointment for you at the clinic.”
“No, thanks.”
“But if things aren’t right—”
“I need a rest, that’s all.”
“I’m glad you’re admitting it. You haven’t had any time off since I came here.”
“Yes, I have. I went up to San Francisco for the convention in June.”
“Just three days. That’s no holiday.”
He didn’t answer. But his shoulders were shaking, as if he was laughing silently to himself. He did that quite frequently lately, laughed to himself, and it annoyed Hazel not to know what the joke was. She never asked him, though, because she was a little afraid that he might tell her and that it wouldn’t be quite so funny spoken out loud.
The buzzer sounded again and she went out through the hall to the waiting room. Since it was the doctor’s afternoon off, the Venetian blinds were closed tight and the front door was locked.
Hazel opened it, squinting against the sudden sun.
“The doctor is not— Oh, it’s you.”
The girl said, very brightly and gaily, “Yes, it’s me,” as if she had enjoyed every moment standing on the roofless stucco porch in the blazing noon. Her face looked stiff; the sun seemed to have squeezed all the moisture out of it. In her right hand she carried a suitcase with “Ruby MacCormick” printed on the side in black crayon, and across her left forearm was a red fox fur.
“Me again,” she said blithely. “Is the doctor—?”
“He’s working in the lab.”
“I won’t disturb him then. I only—all I want is some place to sit down for a minute and think. I can’t seem to think in this weather.”
“It’s cooler inside.”
“I won’t bother you.” The girl stepped inside and put the suitcase on the floor and laid the red fox across it. “It’s just, I want to sit for a minute. I’ve been walking. The suitcase is very heavy. I ought to have taken a taxi, except I wasn’t sure where I was going.”
Hazel closed the door. “You’re leaving town?”
“No. No, I’m moving. The establishment where I’ve been staying, well, it’s awfully low class. Not what I’m used to. If Mummy and Daddy ever found out, well, they’d kill me. I’m used to nice things.”
“I’ll get you some water.”
“No. No, I don’t want to bother you, Miss Philip. I was just passing and I remembered how kind you were last week and I thought I’d drop in and thank you and then be on my way.”
“What way, if you don’t know where you’re going?”
“There must be places for a girl of my background.”
Hazel didn’t know what her background was. She’d met her only once before, the previous Friday. She had come to the office early in the morning and Gordon had introduced her to Hazel as Ruby MacCormick, a friend of one of his nieces from up north. As it turned out, Gordon himself had arranged
the meeting because Ruby was out of a job and he thought Hazel might be able to suggest some type of employment. Ruby was very young and untrained, and the only possibility Hazel could think of was the Beachcomber, a restaurant out on the wharf which was operated, and partly owned, by her ex-husband, George. Because of his temper, and the influx of summer tourists, George was constantly plagued by a shortage of waitresses and he was willing to try anyone who could walk and count up to ten. Ruby could do both.
Hazel poured some water from the cooler and the girl drank it thirstily. She was so thin that her Adam’s apple was prominent as a boy’s, and moved up and down when she swallowed.
Ruby smiled, her mouth still wet from the water. “That was good. It’s funny, I didn’t even know I was thirsty. Daddy says I was always like that—I never let physical things bother me, I never squalled for food the way some babies do.”
“Have you had any lunch?”
“Not yet. I’m waiting till I go to work. Lunch and dinner are free.”
“You got the job, then?”
Ruby widened her eyes. “Didn’t I tell you? I guess I forgot. Mr. Anderson hired me right off the bat.”
“Good.”
“Of course I’m only a waitress, there was no opening as a hostess, but Mr. Anderson says I have a chance to work up . . . I did just what you told me. I went over to the bartender and I said someone had told me he needed a waitress and practically the next minute I was hired. I didn’t even have to mention your name, it was that quick.”
Hazel didn’t bother informing her that this was the way George did all his hiring, and firing, too.
“Are you and Mr. Anderson friends?”
“We were at one time,” Hazel said dryly. “We haven’t seen much of each other lately.” She was usually very quick to tell anyone, even a total stranger, about her personal affairs, including the complete history of her marriage to George, but she had no wish to confide in this girl. Ruby’s strange talk disturbed her. It was like listening to a bird talk; the words sounded real, they could be understood well enough, but they had no connection with the bird’s thoughts.
“Well, I won’t keep you.” Ruby rose and picked up the red fox and slung it across her arm with a show of elegant indifference as if she had a hundred such furs stashed away in her drawers at home. But every now and then, as she talked, Hazel had caught her glancing at the fox with anxiety and affection the way a mother glances at a loved but wayward child.
One thing Hazel was sure of—the fox had seen better days; Ruby hadn’t.
She said, “What kind of place are you looking for?”
“Oh, just a room. I can’t afford anything fancy like I was used to at home. I’m standing on my own two feet now, that’s what I wrote and told Daddy.”
“My cousin Ruth has a friend who runs a rooming house. She calls it a tourist home. It’s on El Camino del Mar.”
“That sounds like a very high class location.”
“It’s the highway. 101.”
“Oh.” Ruby’s jaw tightened but when she spoke again her voice was as gay and blithe as ever: “Well, none of my friends up north will know the difference. They’ll think it’s high class just like I thought.” She paused. “Is it far from here?”
“Ten blocks or so.”
“Oh God.” Ruby sat down again, holding the fox’s head close against her face.
Hazel looked away. Dead things made her nervous.
“I can call you a cab,” she said.
“No. No thanks.”
“It’s a long way, in this heat.”
“I don’t—I don’t mind the heat like most people. I’m just a little tired, but I’ll manage. I always do. I’m stronger than I look.”
To prove her point she got back onto her feet. She wore winter shoes, black suede pumps scuffed at the toes and heels. Her stockingless legs were very white, as if they’d been frozen.
“I’d better be on my way.”
“Hold it a minute while I phone and see if Mrs. Freeman has a vacancy. It might save you a trip.”
“You’re kind, Miss Philip, you’re a kind person,” Ruby said, in a surprised voice.
It was too hot to argue so Hazel merely shook her head.
She used the extension phone in the operating room, partly because she didn’t want Ruby to overhear her conversation, and partly because she liked to sit in the dental chair while she was telephoning.
Ruth answered the telephone: “Hello? Hazel? I was just doing the lunch dishes.” Ruth always made a point of telling people what she was doing, had just done or was about to do. In this way she gave the impression that she did as much work as any six people and so could never be accused of being lazy or not earning her keep. “What do you want? I was just about to start on the Venetian blinds.”
“There’s a young girl here looking for a room. I thought I’d send her over to Mrs. Freeman’s.”
“Is the girl respectable?”
“She’s a friend of one of Dr. Foster’s relatives from up north.”
“Then she should certainly be respectable.” Ruth was the official baby sitter for the Fosters’ three children, and while she hadn’t much interest in, or use for, Gordon, she admired Elaine Foster tremendously.
Hazel said, “I don’t want to send the girl all the way over there unless Mrs. Freeman has a vacancy. Could you give me her phone number?”
“She doesn’t have a phone. What with the girls using it all the time, she had it taken out. But I know she has a vacancy. I saw her last night at the organ recital at church.”
“What’s the house number?”
“1906.”
“Thanks.”
“Hazel? Are you still there? . . . When I finish the blinds, I have to go over to the Fosters’ to baby-sit, but when I come home I thought I’d wax all the window sills.”
“You don’t have to.”
“Wax is a preservative.”
“All right, then. All right.” There was no use in arguing with Ruth. Hazel knew that by evening the window sills would all be waxed and Ruth would be lying on the bed with a wet cloth across her eyes.
Gordon came in from the lab and began washing his hands at the basin.
Hazel climbed awkwardly out of the dental chair. “Have you finished?”
“With the bridge, yes. I still have that inlay to cast.”
“I can help you.”
“It’s your afternoon off as well as mine.”
“In this weather there’s nothing I want to do anyway.” There was something, but she would never have admitted it to anyone: she wanted to go down to the beach in a brand-new bathing suit and look the way she had twenty years ago when she and George were married. She had changed in those twenty years, and so had George, but it was characteristic of Hazel that she noticed more changes in herself than in him.
Gordon dried his hands on a linen towel. “Who was at the door?”
“That girl, the one who was here last week.”
“Girl?”
“Ruby MacCormick.”
“Well,” he said, carefully. “What did she want?”
“She’s still here.”
“Oh.”
“She wants a room. She’s moving. I was just trying to find a place for her to go.”
“And did you?”
“I think so. It’s on the highway, 1906.”
“Not a very good location.”
“The best she can afford, that’s my opinion. She talks big, but I can tell. Any woman could.”
He threw away the towel and stood for a moment with his clenched fist pressed against the left side of his chest. It was a way he had of standing lately, as if all his problems had gathered together in a tight little bunch around his heart, and the press
ure of his fist was meant to dispel them.
Hazel leaned over and picked up the towel and put it in the laundry container. She spoke quietly: “Maybe you’d better go out and say hello to her, just for politeness’s sake.”
“I’d prefer not to.”
“All right then, I’ll say it for you.”
“Do that.” He hesitated a moment. “Did you bring your car this morning?”
“Yes.”
“Perhaps it wouldn’t be too much out of your way to drive the girl as far as the highway. I feel a certain obligation to her because she’s a stranger in town.”
“Well, so do I, only I wanted to stay and help you cast the inlay. I’ll pour it up for you.”
“I can do it alone. Or you can come back later, if you insist.”
“I’ll come back.”
“Thank you, Hazel.”
He sounded so deeply grateful that she wasn’t sure what he was thanking her for; it couldn’t be for anything so trivial as offering to help him with the inlay, or driving Ruby over to the highway.
On the way to Mrs. Freeman’s, the girl sat quiet and motionless except when Hazel’s old Chevy hit a bump or turned a fast corner, or when Hazel asked a direct question: “What made you decide to come to Channel City?”
“I wanted to get away from home.”
“This is a tough place to make a living.”
“I have a job.”
“You’d do better down south. Some of the big airplane factories—”
“I like it here.”
“There’s not much chance of promotion being a waitress at the Beachcomber.”
“Mr. Anderson says I can work up to cashier or hostess if I try.”
“And after that?”
Ruby frowned and then rubbed away the frown lines with the tip of her forefinger. “After that I might get married.”
“Have you a boyfriend back home?”
“Loads of them, but they’re all silly and immature.”
“How old are you, Ruby?”
“Old enough.”
Hazel wanted to laugh—the things the girl said were funny, but the way she said them was not. There was an air of stubborn earnestness about her, as if she had in the back of her mind a single and solemn purpose that obliterated all others.
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