For Love & Torture_A Submissives’ Secrets Novel

by Michelle Love

  I do as he says, letting him play out his role, but I’m not very happy about it. After I pull on a silky pair white panties, I go to the drawer of the nightstand and pull out my notebook and pen, jotting down exactly how I feel about his order this morning. I was told to wear no bra this morning under a dress that clearly shows my nipples when they’re hard. Which they are right now, as I’m upset about going into town, seeing people and people seeing me as I’m free-titting it! This sub is not a happy camper at the moment.

  “What’re you writing, Jade?” he asks me as he puts on his running shoes.

  “I’m jotting down my feelings about this.” I put the notebook and pen away and walk over to him, making sure my boobs bounce as I do. “I feel naked.”

  “You look gorgeous,” he says, then pulls me to sit on his lap. “And it makes me happy to see those puppies unleashed and free to move about. Don’t you like to make me happy, Jade?”

  His grin is adorable, and I kind of hate that he’s using it on me, melting my heart in a way. I kiss his cheek and wrap my arms around him. “How do you do this to me? Ugh! Fine, I like making you happy. Are you ready to go and get this humiliation over with?”

  “You don’t have any reason to feel humiliated. You’re the bomb dot com.” He gets up, placing my feet on the floor. “Now, let’s get going. I’d like to have the electricity back on by lunch. I can’t wait for another one of your famous sandwiches.”

  “Oh! Do you think the items in the fridge are okay?” I ask, as I think about the temperature in the appliance.

  “I think they are for now. But they won’t be much longer. We need the electricity to get back on ASAP! So, come one.”

  He takes my hand, and I go along with him out to his car, a snazzy little number he calls his baby. An Alfa Romeo 4C. The interior is decadent and smells like fresh leather. I take in a long sniff as I put on my seatbelt.

  Pierce gets in, catching me breathing in his car, and I laugh as he gives me an odd look. “Don’t! I just love the way it smells in here, that’s all. Don’t look at me as if I’m crazy.”

  “It’s just that I felt a pang of jealousy, as you seemed to be getting a bit intimate with the car.” He starts it up, and off we go.

  “Jealous, huh? I think that’s a good thing.” I reach over and take his hand, holding it and resting our clasped hands on the console between us.

  “I’m not sure if it’s a good thing or not. I’m not the jealous type. I’m beginning to wonder if you’ve put a spell on me, turning me into a man I’m not.” He looks at me with a bit of distrust in his eyes.

  “Some say a person isn’t who they truly are until they find the other half of themselves. Do you think that’s true, Pierce?” I ask him as I give him my best smile.

  “No, I don’t. However, I do think that people can make temporary changes in each other. But they’re just that, temporary. We all go back to who we truly are, once the honeymoon is over. It’s best you keep that in mind, Jade. I may be acting in a way that you like right now, but I’m really not this guy. This is vacation-Pierce. This is the Pierce who has a contract with a gorgeous woman who he has at his disposal to do with what he wants. This Pierce has no troubles. In short, this isn’t the real me.”

  “Are you faking?” I ask him, as I watch his eyes for the signs that would tell me if he’s lying.

  “I’m not faking. Not one bit. I’m also not acting like myself. I want to be honest with you. At home, I can be moody. I need alone time more than most people do.”

  “Do you feel like being alone now and just don’t want to hurt my feelings?”

  “No, I love being around you. If this was to go on longer than the vacation, say once I had to get back to the grind of my job, then you’d see a different man. A man who isn’t much like the one I have been.”

  “The man you’ve been with me?”

  He nods. “Yeah, that guy. I don’t hardly know who he is. The truth is, I’ve never felt so light-hearted in my life. But it’s a high that I’m sure to come down off of, eventually. And you’re sure to be disappointed when my true self comes back to the surface, taking me over and leaving you wondering what the hell happened.”

  Pondering his words, I look out the window. Melancholy fills me as I hate to think about when this will end. I suppose I’m pretending it will last forever. But Pierce’s disbelief in himself is sure to end us at the end of the summer.

  I’ve heard of summer romances. They burn bright and then fizzle out, much like a shooting star. I can’t see an end like that for us at this time. Maybe because this is only our third day together. Perhaps closer to the end of the summer, we’ll begin to grow apart. Pierce will start thinking about work, and I’ll think about getting back to school. We’ll be moving on in separate parts of the world, so far away that even weekend visits won’t make sense.

  It will all be over in no time at all!

  Sadness creeps in behind the melancholy, sending my shoulders sagging, a thing Pierce notices. “No getting depressed about how things will end, Jade. We’re living in the moment for the summer. Letting ourselves be whatever we want to be. Not allowing the conformity of our real lives to impact our fantasy lives.”

  “But this isn’t a fantasy, Pierce. This is real. Everything we’re feeling is real,” I argue.

  “And as real as it is, it’s also fleeting. No one can stay on top of this high forever. No one, Jade. So, just enjoy it while we have it. It’s a rare gem we’ve found. But like anything rare, it’s often taken away or crumbles when touched. Just live for now and don’t worry about what happens in the end.”

  With a nod, I agree with him. What else can I do? Argue that what we’ve found is rare and unique and he should try harder to see it that way, instead of seeing it as a thing that can’t last?

  Why am I the only one who thinks it can last? Is it because I’m young and naïve? Is it because he’s the first man I’ve ever had sex with? Is it because he’s the first man I’ve ever loved?

  I know I love Pierce. My heart soars like never before. Just the touch of his hand comforts me while also stimulating me, an odd combination I’ve never felt before. And I don’t see it going away as the summer comes to an end.

  But he does.

  The little town comes into view, and I can see the sign of a café hovering high above the one-story buildings that pepper the landscape ahead of us. “And this town is called?” I ask.

  “Pecan Grove,” he tells me. “Somehow a small orchard of pecan trees has managed to survive the harsh winters here for over a hundred years. Hence the name. The Pecan Grove Café seems to be the only place to eat in this town.” He pulls into the sparsely populated area, and we get out.

  The first thing he does is pull out his cell to try to get a signal. There’s absolutely no reception at the cabin. “Do you have signal?”

  “I do,” he tells me as he swipes his phone. “It’s not a fantastic number of bars, but there are some. Head inside and get us some breakfast coming, I’m starving. I need to call the landlord.”

  “Anything special you’d like?” I ask him.

  “Surprise me. Order me what you think I’d like,” Pierce says, putting the pressure on me.

  “Great,” I mumble as I head inside. I cross my arms over my breasts to keep my erect nipples hidden.

  “Mornin’, girly,” an old woman wearing a dingy white apron and a mustard yellow waitress uniform greets me. Her white hair is piled high on top of her head, and I bet she’s been a staple at this establishment since it opened.

  “Good morning, ma’am,” I call back to her. “Might I take that booth over there? The view’s lovely out these picture windows.”

  “Sure, sit anywhere you’d like,” she says as she grabs a couple of menus and wipes them down with a rag she’s pulled out of her apron pocket. “You from London?”

  “North Wales, actually. Contrary to popular opinion, all Brits do not reside in London. And have you always lived here in Pecan Grove?”

&n
bsp; “Born and raised. My father opened this café when I was a little kid. I’ve worked here since I could walk. Can I get you some coffee?”

  I inwardly applaud myself for being so insightful about the woman being a staple here. “Coffee would be nice. Bring me two of them. My, um, my …” I have no idea what to call Pierce. “My friend is outside on the phone. Bring him one too. And please bring cream and sugar as well.”

  “I’ll get those for you while you look over our menu,” she tells me, then turns to leave.

  The vast assortment of breakfast foods is astonishing. Crepes in all kinds of flavors fill an entire section. Waffles, pancakes, pigs in a blanket, and omelets of all types are on the menu.

  “It’s impossible to pick one,” I mutter to myself as the waitress comes back with the coffees.

  “I heard you having difficulty with the menu. Would you like to know what Old Bob’s specialty is?” she asks me with a wink.

  “I’d love that,” I say as I put the menu down.

  “He makes a mean Denver omelet. And on the side are some downhome cooked hash browns along with some mile-high homemade biscuits. You can even have a small bowl of gravy to dip them in, if you’d like. I like to round the meal out with a bowl of fresh fruit on top of vanilla yogurt. Does any of that sound good to you?”

  “All of it does. Can you bring two orders of all that?” I hand her the menus back, and she gives me a smile. Her nametag reads Delores, so I add, “And thank you very much, Delores. My name’s Jade Thomas; it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

  I reach out, and she shakes my hand. “It’s not often a customer introduces themselves to me, Jade. It’s refreshing. I’ll make sure it all comes out real special. I can see you want to impress that handsome friend of yours.”

  I follow her eyes as she looks out the window. Pierce is still on his cell talking away, but looking at me as he stands on the sidewalk. “He is handsome, isn’t he?”

  “He is, and he has eyes for you, my dear. Let me get cracking on this order. I’ll hurry it up for you.”

  Pierce and I look at one another with the window between us. He’s smiling a bit, and then he gives me a thumbs up and ends the call, coming inside.

  Hurrying to wipe away the damn tears that’ve sprung up, I try to push the thoughts of this ending out of my head so we can enjoy this breakfast that I pray is delicious. It’s not as if I’ve cooked it, but I feel the same pressure to make sure it’s good for him.

  I have no idea how I made that a priority so quickly. It’s never entered my head to make sure anyone’s meal is as close to perfect as it can get. I’ve never cared what anyone thinks about what I wear or how my hair looks. So why did it all spring to life in me when I met Pierce?

  Is it his natural dominating character that has me not only bending to his will but catering to him because I want to? Do I really want to be doing this? Acting this way? Or is it a subtle mind game he’s learned to play masterfully?

  He slides into the booth on the opposite side and reaches out, taking both my hands and smiling like crazy at me. “You looked so pretty sitting here all alone. I imagined seeing you for the first time right here. Funny, huh?”

  “I guess so,” I say, as I find it odd that he’d imagine something like that. “Pierce, have you always had the ability to make women do things they shouldn’t find pleasure in? Things like getting spanked, making meals, bathing you.”

  “No,” he says with a shrug. “My only relationships had the women doing as they wished and none wished to do things for me. And I wasn’t into BDSM back then. I couldn’t tell you if they’d like to be handled the way I handle women now. And how are you feeling about being tied up today?”

  “Honestly?” I ask him, and he nods. “Pierce, I find it more enjoyable than I thought I would. I want to feel your hands wrap the rope around my arms and legs and haul me into the air, suspending me over the wood floor of the playroom. Does that make me immoral?”

  “Not at all,” he says as he shakes his head. “It makes you in touch with your true feelings. You’re not denying things because of what you’ve been taught is wrong or immoral. Yes, if things of that nature were done against your will, then that would definitely be wrong. But with your consent, then there’s nothing wrong with it, and it expands you as a person. You’ll see what I’m talking about. And we can go slowly. Just know that.”

  Delores comes to us with gorgeous bowls of fresh fruit. “This should tide you kids over while the other food cooks. Can I get you some glasses of water?”

  Pierce smiles at her. “That would be great. This looks amazing. Thank you.”

  She places the bowls in front of us, then places a couple of gold linen napkins with silverware stored inside of them. “I’ll be right back with that and freshen up your coffees as well.”

  “Thank you, Delores,” I say, sending her on her way.

  Pierce reaches across the table with one hand, and I take it. “This is one of my favorite things to eat, Jade. You have an intuition about you that’s special.”

  I nod and look down as I admit, “The waitress suggested everything. I didn’t do a thing but agree.”

  “Great job agreeing, then. Let’s get to eating.”

  I pick up the napkin, freeing my utensils, and smile all the while as I think about how happy it makes me to do such little things for Pierce. Like a silly child who delights in making her parents laugh, I feel as if I’m right back to those simple days when the smallest of things that I did to bring joy to their lives were the most important thing to me.

  I have no idea if I’m evolving or devolving!

  Pierce

  Her eyes glisten in the dim light as I tighten the leather strap around her tits. Jade watches me as I dress her in the leather that barely covers her. Our first venture into the playroom has us both excited and a little nervous.

  She’s chosen the music for this evening, a collection of hard rock ballads from the ‘80’s that’s purely instrumental and playing quietly in the background. I fasten the strap that holds the leather covering her pussy to the leather covering her tits and she’s done. “You look great.”

  I move her to turn around so she can see herself in the full-length mirror I’ve placed on the far wall. “My Lord!”

  Kissing the side of her neck, I run my hands over her stomach, then over her hips. “Stunning, aren’t you?”

  “It’s weird. I look so, so …”

  “Sexy,” I finish her thought. “And you’re about to look even sexier, tied up in my ropes. Now let’s do this right. Start at the beginning, but we’ll only play it out until the first six strokes of the flogger. Just like we talked about earlier.”

  With a nod, she walks away, kneeling outside the door. And I follow her, going to our bedroom to change into my dark, loose-fitting pants and nothing else.

  As I walk back out, I look her over as she kneels, head down, and takes relaxing breaths. I braided her short hair in two sections that go down each side of her head. She looks like the real deal. A gorgeous female specimen, and I take pride in my work thus far.

  Walking past her to the ropes that hang from the ceiling, I switch things up a bit so as not to completely reenact what I did with the woman on the video. I want Jade to feel special. “Come to me, Jade.”

  As directed, she gets up, keeping her head down, and comes to me. I’ve instructed her to keep her head down until I tell her otherwise or pick it up myself. I’m surprised to find her body warm and not shaking as I take her right arm and run my hand up and down it. Moving the soft rope around it three times in a spiral fashion, I move her hand over it to hold it while I do the same to the other.

  With both arms secured, I take two smaller sections of rope and tie them around each wrist, binding the larger rope to her and making it impossible for her to escape. “These will only come off you when I allow that, Jade. Do you understand?”

  “I do,” she whispers huskily.

  “Good girl,” I whisper in her ear. “Are you ok
ay?”

  “I am.”

  With her approval, I move on, wrapping the remainder of the right rope around her upper thigh. I do the same with the rope on the left, then go to get more short rope to hold them in place. “Now, I’ll pull the ropes to suspend your body in the air, Jade. If you feel pulling at your shoulders or your hips, you must let me know right away. The risk of dislocation is great if that happens. You should feel pressure on both your arms and your legs, but nothing else.”

  “I understand and promise to be honest with you, Pierce.”

  I kiss her lips, then ask, “Would you like to be blindfolded?”

  “Not at this time, please,” she answers.

  I’ve explained to her that being held off the ground can feel a bit like vertigo and some respond better to it by being blindfolded. But I’ll let her have her way for now.

  Hoisting the two ropes at the same time to keep her arms and legs at the same angle at all times, I lift her body off the ground, then hook the ropes to keep her up. Moving quickly, I pull two more ropes from hooks on the wall and tie them around her ankles, making her body go sideways, leaving her hanging over the floor, face first.

  “Oh!” she says as she looks at the floor. “Um, uh …”

  “Color, Jade?”

  “Green. Just this feels odd is all.”

  I leave her still for a moment so she can gain some equilibrium. “I’m going to move you back and forth now. Are you sure you still don’t want a blindfold?”

  “I’m sure.”

  Pulling the ropes, I move her back and forth and watch her close her eyes, then open them. I suppose she’s trying to see which way works best for her. “I’m going to pull you in the other direction now.”

  “Okay.”

  Her body swings from side to side and I keep pulling, taking her higher and higher into the air. The ceiling is tall, giving us lots of room to play with. She gasps each time I allow her body to swing close to the floor. It gives a false idea that she’ll hit it.

  Her face is flushed, so I ease up and hold her in a stationary position. “Now to the flogging. If you’re ready for that.”