A Fistful of Love: A Domestic Violence Anthology

by Thomas, Dominique

  Stone was just standing over me. He wasn’t trying to console me or shit. What type of father doesn’t console the mother of his child, that they both loss. Regardless of how he has treated me, I would never look over him being Tianna’s father. About an hour later, I was allowed to go back and see my daughter before they transferred her to the morgue. I wanted an autopsy done on her. I couldn’t rest until I knew what happened to my baby.

  Stone was dead set against it, but I didn’t care. He could beat my ass from here to Tennessee and it wouldn’t matter. They allowed us to sit with her for as long as we wanted. I was sick to my stomach, watching Stone cry like he really cared. I could no longer take watching him perform, so I kissed my beautiful angel, and prayed for her soul. I left the hospital without one word to him or his family.

  My daughter was dead, and it was all their fault. He took her from me, and now she’s dead. Ain’t no coming back from that shit. No amount of pain he has ever inflicted on me, could hurt worse than my daughter’s death. I’ll never forgive him for this. I drove straight to my best-friend Shannie’s house. She had no clue what was going on. I had been giving her some space, because she had just gotten married. I didn’t want to burden her with my problems, but right now she was all I had and the only one I wanted to be bothered with.

  Chapter 4- Stone

  I had been looking all around for K’Yonnah since she left the hospital. I swear this bitch was trying her best to make me kill her ass. Granted our daughter just passed, so I might spare her funky ass, but this bitch was really trying a nigga right now. I know it’s hard to believe, but a nigga is real fucked up about my baby girl. I feel really bad because I should have just left Tianna at home with her momma. I wanted to teach K’yonnah a lesson, but this was never my intention.

  “Stop sitting over there blaming yourself, son. The doctor told you it might have been Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.” My mother was trying her best to console me, but nothing was helping at the moment.

  “I know what he said, but that shit don’t make it better. My daughter is dead, and I know for a fact K’Yonnah blames me.”

  “Everything is going to be okay.” Fayia said as she came and wrapped her arms around me. The fact that she was at my mother’s house was mind boggling, because I thought they didn’t get along at all. I hugged her back, but I quickly removed myself from her embrace. I didn’t want to be touched right now.

  The only thing I could think about at the moment was my daughter and finding K’Yonnah’s ass. I was pissed that she would even want a fucking autopsy on our daughter to begin with. All I wanted to do was lay my baby girl to rest. I was becoming irritated with the looks that my sister had been giving me all night. I was like five minutes away from smacking the shit out of her.

  As of late, we haven’t been on speaking terms, because she just recently found out about my sons. Plus, she couldn’t stand Fayia. She wasn’t too fond of K’Yonnah either, but she was cordial to her. My sister was the type of person who didn’t make it a habit to get too cool with the women in my life. I was actually surprised to see her console K’Yonnah at the hospital.

  “What the fuck you keep looking at me like that for?”

  “I’m looking at your sad, pathetic ass. Your daughter just passed away, and you have no idea where K’Yonnah is at. But your mistress is here acting as if she gives fuck. I’m disappointed in you, Stone.”

  Any other time I would have had a comeback, but she was absolutely right. This shit was so inaccurate right now. Instead of me responding, I decided to just get up and leave, at the moment I needed to be by myself. I headed home in the hopes of finding K’Yonnah there, but when I made it there the house was empty.

  I went inside our bedroom and I was in shocked when I saw the empty codeine bottle on the dresser. I was gone fuck her up, if she was doing drugs and shit. I laid across the bed and tried to track her phone, but I couldn’t because she had cut the shit off. I swear K’Yonnah was gone make me fuck her ass up. Right now was not the time for her to be pulling disappearing acts and shit. Not to mention her ass around her drinking Codeine and shit like she’s crazy.

  Chapter 5- K’Yonnah

  I had been sitting on Shannie’s porch for the last two hours. I was hoping and praying that she came home soon. I had been calling her phone, but it was going straight to voicemail. I was so busy trying to get out of the house and to the hospital that I forgot to grab my purse. It was a fall night so it was kind of chilly. I decided to get inside of my car and recline the driver’s seat as far as it would go.

  Despite not moving the car I looked in the rearview mirror out of habit. My heart sank looking at my baby’s Hello Kitty car seat. Tears streamed down my face, as I wondered if she was fighting to breathe, while she was taking her last breath. I tried to shake the thought from my mind, because I could see her face clear as day. I hated the fact that she was still blue as I held her in my arms for the last time. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.

  *****

  “K’Yonnah! K’Yonnah!” The sound of someone calling my name, and banging on my car window made me jump out of my sleep. I looked up and it was Shannie. I wiped my eyes and opened the door. It was daylight. I couldn’t believe I had slept through the night.

  “What the hell are you doing in my driveway sleep?”

  “Tianna died in her sleep last night. I had nowhere else to go. He killed her Shannie! He killed my baby.”

  “What! Oh my God, Yonnie! Come on in the house.” Shannie grabbed me by the arm and lead me into her house. Once we were inside, we went over and sat down on the couch.

  “Everything cool, bae?” Her husband Kartier said as he came into the living room.

  “Tianna died last night.” I heard Shannie’s voice crack, after all she was her godmother.

  “Oh my God! I’m sorry to hear that. If there’s anything you need, we got you. Okay, K’Yonnah?”

  “Thanks, Kartier. I really don’t want to come over here, and put my problems on you guys. I just feel like I’m about to die everything in my life is falling apart.” I put my head down in my hands and cried some more. I’ve never cried so much in my life, I thought to myself.

  “It’s cool we’re family. Why don’t you go lay down and try to get some rest. I’ll try to hit up Stone and let him know you’re here. He’s probably worried to death.”

  “No! Please, don’t’ call him. I just want some time away from him.” I jumped up from the couch and said to him. He was looking at me like I was crazy. Shannie grabbed me and walked me upstairs to her guest bedroom.

  “Get you some rest. I’ll be back in a little while with you something to eat. It’s clean towels and everything in the closet for you. I love you, K’Yonnah, and we’re going to get through this together. I feel like there’s something you’re not telling me, but I won’t press the issue until you’re ready to talk. Please believe me, I will kill Stone myself if he is responsible for hurting you or my god baby.” We hugged and she left out of the room.

  After gathering myself, I went into the adjoining bathroom, and I got undressed. I felt so stinky and dirty. Plus, I just wanted to sleep my life away. I was feeling beaten and broken down. I was trying to hold my head up, and be strong because I knew my parents and my daughter would want me to be happy. It’s just so hard for me. I prayed for better days as I showered. Once I was finished, I stepped out and dried off. Once I was finished I dropped the towel and walked back into the bedroom. At the same time, the room door opened.

  “Oh shit! I’m sorry. I didn’t know anyone was in here.” I looked up and it was Boss. I was so shocked to see him in my friend’s house that I forgot I was completely naked. I tried to cover up as I looked at his face screwed up. I immediately felt embarrassed and ashamed, I felt so fat at the moment.

  “That nigga did that shit to you, Ma!” I looked over myself and realized I was covered in bruises.

  I looked down and the floor, because I was too ashamed to look up in his face. After se
conds of silence, I finally looked up, and he was gone. That shit made me feel so uncomfortable as a woman. I put on Shannie’s jogging suit that I found hanging inside of the closet. Instead of trying to figure out what Boss was doing here, I decided to lay down because I couldn’t even face him.

  Chapter 6- Shannie

  I had been trying my best not to break down and cry. The sight of K’Yonnah hurt me to my heart. I’ve never in all of my years seen her look so broken. I hate that I haven’t been able to spend more time with her. We’ve always been the best of friends, and we’ve always done everything together.

  Once she got with Stone, he changed her completely. It was never my intention to fall back to the point where I wasn’t up to speed on her life and what was going on in it. On several occasions she had divulged to me that he put his hands on her, but she swept it under the rug like it was nothing, so I stayed in my lane. That shit is so dead now. I will no longer sit back and let my friend be hurt by this good for nothing ass nigga. I knew he wasn’t shit when I saw him with that hoe, Fayia. I wanted to beat their asses myself, but I was with Kartier and I knew he would snap the fuck out if I got in another man’s business. I made sure to let Stone see my face. I was disgusted, because he acted as if it wasn’t shit that I saw him with another bitch. I lost all respect for the nigga as a man after that.

  As quiet as it’s kept, I lost some respect for K’Yonnah because she let him treat her like shit. Got her out here looking bad in these streets, behind some buzzard ass bitch. I was having a hard time trying to wrap my mind around the fact that Tianna has passed away. Not to mention K’Yonnah saying that Stone had something to do with it. Her ass needed to get all the rest she could, because she was going to have to tell me something.

  *****

  “What’s up, bro? I didn’t even hear you come in.” My brother-in-law, Boss had been staying with us until his house was finished being renovated.

  “What’s up, sis? I didn’t know you had company in the guest bedroom, I made a mistake and walked in on her. I swear that nigga Stone gone make me lay hands on his bitch ass.” Boss fumed and knocked the kitchen chair over. I was in shock as he walked out of the backdoor.

  I was also confused because, to my knowledge, he had never even met my friend. I went to check on K’Yonnah, because I knew that she was probably freaking out from Boss walking in on her.

  “Boss told you he walked in on K’Yonnah?” Kartier said as he grabbed a Corona from the fridge.

  “Yeah, he did. I was just about to go and check on her.”

  “Ask her about what that nigga been doing to her. Boss said her fucking body is covered in bruises and marks. If that nigga beating on her, he gone get fucked up and that’s on my life.” I watched as Kartier walked away.

  I knew that he was dead ass serious. Stone didn’t stand a chance fucking with Kartier and Boss, they’re some crazy ass niggas. As I made my way up the stairs the doorbell rang. I rushed back to the door and opened it without asking who it was.

  “Where K’Yonnah?” Stone tried to step in, but I blocked his ass from entering my house.

  “Don’t walk up in my shit, unless I invite your punk ass in. Your ass ain’t welcome here with your woman beating ass.”

  “Could you just go get K’Yonnah for me?”

  “You must didn’t here my wife the first time. Get ya punk ass from around here, before I let my lil bro put some hot shit in ya ass.”

  “I’m definitely dying to lay his bitch ass down.” I turned around, and Boss had a gun down by his side.

  “That’s how it is, huh? You fucking this nigga, K’Yonnah?” We all turned around and K’Yonnah was standing at the bottom of the stairs.

  “No, Stone, I’m not fucking him, and that’s the last thing that’s on my mind. Our daughter is dead, and the shit is all your fault. Just leave, Stone, I just want to mourn my daughter, and bury her without any drama. Please leave, Stone. I can’t do this with you right now.” K’Yonnah spoke solemnly, and walked away leaving Stone standing there looking stupid ass ever.

  “This shit ain’t over. I know they told you niggas, don’t ever pull a gun on somebody if you not going to use it.”

  “That shit can be arranged, my nigga, in the meantime you know where I be. Get at me, nigga.” Boss said as him and Stone stared each other down.

  I knew this shit was not going to be good. Stone finally left, and I breathed a sigh of relief, because the last thing I wanted was for them to kill that nigga on my brand new oriental rug. K’Yonnah might be blind to the fact, but from the looks of it, Boss was feeling her. I’ve never saw him get all in his feelings over a bitch that wasn’t his, or any bitch for that matter. I laughed on the inside as I watched Boss place his gun back in his waist and walk out the door like it wasn’t shit.

  “That lil nigga is not working with a full deck, bae.” My husband said as he kissed me on the cheek and walked out of the door behind him.

  “He got that shit from you. Ya’ll be careful. I’m about to cook dinner, so don’t be gone long.” Once they walked out, I went upstairs and laid across the bed where K’Yonnah was.

  “You know it’s about to be some shit between Boss and Stone. I don’t know what you did to Boss, but you got that nigga trying to kill Stone over your ass.”

  “What the hell you mean, what I did to Boss? I haven’t done anything to him. I was wondering what the hell he was doing here when he came in the room earlier, but after looking at the resemblance between him and Kartier I can tell that they are kin.”

  “Yeah, they’re brothers. Now tell me, how do you know Boss?”

  “I really don’t know him. It’s just that he seems to always be around when some shit is going on with Stone and me. When I first caught Stone and Fayia together, he helped me off the ground after Stone knocked me on my ass. The second time was when me and the bitch, Fayia, got to fighting at the hair salon. Stone caught me and him talking. He beat my ass until I lost consciousness, and when I came to, he had took my baby from me. He told me he took her over his mother’s, so I went over there to get my baby.

  “I banged on that door for damn near an hour, and they wouldn’t answer the door for me. The old bitch called Stone, and he came snapping, telling me to go home before he beat my ass. My heart sank as I saw Fayia sitting in the car with him. Like this nigga really didn’t give a fuck about me.

  “I was feeling so hurt and broken that I went home and drank a whole bottle of Codeine. I was so disappointed that I didn’t die. I don’t want to live anymore. Tianna was all I had in this world that belonged to me, and now she’s gone.”

  I rubbed K’Yonnah’s back as she spoke, trying to console her. There were no words that would help the fact that her daughter was dead. I was still speechless knowing that the baby had passed away. The thing that messed me up the most, was that K’Yonnah felt like she had to take her own life, because she felt as if she had nothing to live for. I was really feeling like shit at the moment. I hadn’t been a good friend to her, but all that shit was about to change.

  “Don’t ever think that you’re alone out here. You got me, and we’re more than just friends we’re a family. We’ll get through this. I don’t want to judge you but you need to let Stone go. What it’s gon’ take for you to leave him alone? I heard you have marks all over your body. That shit ain’t cool, K’Yonnah. Let him go beat on that bitch, Fayia. Please listen to me, that nigga ain’t worth you trying to kill yourself. Fuck him.

  “I’ve never been the type of woman to tell another woman to leave her nigga, but you need to get far away from him before he kills you. That nigga can’t keep putting his hands on you like that. Now on a lighter note, what you need to do is try to give Boss some play, because that nigga feeling you. Girl, it’s something about the way he defends you, got me feeling like there’s a love connection brewing.”

  “I’m good. The last thing I need right now is a man in my life, knowing it’s about to be hell getting Stone out of my life. Not to mention los
ing Tianna. That shit would be so unhealthy. He is sexy as shit, though.” I fell out laughing as I watched K’Yonnah bite down seductively on her bottom lip. She could play hard to get all she wanted, I know for a fact they are going to eventually hook up, and I’m going to be right there to tell her ass, I told you so.

  Chapter 7- Karion “Boss” Miller

  A nigga who hits on a woman is the biggest coward in my eyes. The fact that this nigga, Stone, is walking around and beating on his girl, like it ain’t shit make my fucking blood boil. Usually I never get in another nigga’s relationship, but its obvious all the beatings he has put on her, has her ass with tunnel vision. For some reason, she can’t see past his ass and the shit that he’s doing to her. The fact that this nigga blatantly cheats on her like its nothing is fucked up.

  What’s worse is that she has seen the shit with her own eyes, and she’s still with this nigga. K’Yonnah needs a strong ass male presence in her life, because it’s obvious she hasn’t been taught her worth. At first I wasn’t even gong to step to her on a personal level, but after walking in that room and seeing her sexy ass body covered in bruises, I knew right then and there I had to have her.