Luella frowned and repeated, “Ohhhhhhh.”
“Say,” he spoke, “you got a hammer and some nails? We can shore up and steady your shed.” He laughed, “It needs some help. Fact is, I see lots of things round here could stand a little help.”
He saw her look around the well-kept yard.
Silki laughed, “Not a lot of help, but a little help, so things don’t get worser.”
Later, he hummed a little as he worked. A man sound. He hit his thumb a few times which meant he could sit down and rub it until it felt better. This was not his line of work, but he did do some good.
Luella had been running in and out of the house, preparing his lunch so he would not have to leave. At last, everything was ready and it was time for lunch. “Lunchtime,” she called from the back door.
Silki struggled up with a frown from the spot he had quickly slumped down to when she ran into the house. The frown turned into his bright smile as he strode around the shed and into Luella’s sight.
“Lunchtime? Lord, has it been that long? I guess it has because my stomach just told me I’m hungry! Girl, you didn’t have to go to no trouble for me. I coulda found somethin somewhere.”
Luella’s heart felt like a wife’s. “Come on in and wash your hands.” He went in like he had done it a thousand times.
Luella had set a lovely table for him. Garden vegetables and a crisply fried pork chop that was tender in the middle and hot bread. “I know this ain’t as nice as you are used to, but I hope it will do. Butter beans out the garden, and rice. I got some gravy for them pork chops. And plenty butter for that cornbread. I buy it fresh from the cow man. You want buttermilk or red soda?”
Silki thought a short minute. “I love iced tea, but red pop will suit me just fine.”
Luella wished she had made iced tea. There wasn’t even any tea in the house. “Well, there sure will be next time,” she thought to herself.
They talked and laughed as they ate and Luella saw he had two side teeth missing; she smiled because she had the same two missing, one on each side. But that didn’t take anything away from his charm. When he smiled he had a way of tightening his cheeks so dimples came in them and the missing side teeth were hidden. Luella decided to practice that smile to hide her own missing teeth.
After lunch, Silki just had to sit a minute because “the house I live in is so noisy and I don’t get a good night’s sleep at night, sometimes. Lemme just sit here a minute, Ms. Luella. My stomach feels so good and my mouth is so happy! I’ll just close my eyes a minute and draw in all this good feelin you got in your house.”
Luella nodded her head, grinning, “You just go on and rest. You been workin in that sun all mornin! I’ll just go on in the kitchen and clean up a bit.”
Silki fell asleep because he hadn’t been to sleep at all last night, he’d been gambling. When Luella came out of the kitchen, drying her hands, she smiled at him sleeping. She tip-toed to her bedroom and got a pillow and took a quilt from her grandma’s chest. She covered him and inch by inch got the pillow under his head. He seldom slept well because he was always around people he could not trust enough to sleep soundly. So not fearing Luella, he slept deeply all the rest of that day far into the evening until even Luella got worried about what her neighbors would think.
When it was plumb dark she woke him up. His eyes rolled round in their sockets, because it took him a minute to remember where he was. He had trained himself not to call out names, so he didn’t say a word until he was sure of where he was. “Oh! Ms. Luella! I done overslept. I got to go. I didn’t mean to stay here on you all day.”
“Mr. Silki, you ain’t done nothin wrong. Just it’s late and I don’t want my neighbors to think I’m doin wrong up in here.”
“No mam! Ms. Luella!”
“You need to just call me Luella, not Ms. Luella.”
“And you need to just call me Silki, not Mr. Silki. Can I stop and see you again, Ms. Lu—ah, Luella?”
“Why sure. You been a big help to me. I preciate you.”
Silki took her hand and led her to the door, thrilling her. He kissed that hand as he went out the door. Thrilling her some more. He went out and closed the door behind him. Luella leaned against it, smiling that smile that lit up her whole body and just thrilling all over her whole self. “Silki,” she whispered out loud. “And Aunt Corrine can’t say nothin bout you cause you worked and helped me.”
Now, Silki thought Luella was nice, but he didn’t like her for himself and he certainly didn’t love her . . . or plan to. She was not fly enough for him. “She ain nowhere near them pretty women I done seen. But she can cook!” The women he did have, or know, were the make-up, baubles and bangles, straightened and curly hair slick with scented pomade kind. They wore tight red, green, yellow, blue or purple dresses; some sparkled. Most of these women “made” money, the little that was out there. They could cook, too, when they had time and the inclination. Silki got some of the money, some of the time, from one or another.
Silki was selfish and it extended to his loving. His love-making. He satisfied himself first and always. Well, a woman, good or bad, gets tired of that. But some good women don’t know it could be better, while the others knew it could be and would be, because they didn’t keep Silki very long. First the money began to dribble in, then stopped. And a beating from him didn’t improve things. He got cut once or twice on his behind. Until at last, they were gone or he was gone.
That’s where he was now. Kinda on the outs. He knew he could do better in a big city. Memphis, Birmingham? Atlanta! He wasn’t ready for New York yet, he thought, but maybe soon . . . Chicago. He just needed some money . . . big money.
Lunch at Luella’s house came to be a regular thing. He said, “Luella, I just can’t help it! I just can’t eat that slop at those cafes no more. Your cookin done spoilt me.”
Luella would smile and serve him, day after day. It was his one good meal a day; sometime the only one a day. The money from his job, he gambled away, always losing. He was a dumb slick and all the fellows knew it, so they always set him up and played on him together. Cheating, like he was trying to do.
Corrine had, of course, noticed Silki and his growing friendship with Luella. She didn’t know or understand Silki, but she had a good idea what he was doing. She knew Luella was starry-eyed and spending her money on plenty food. Luella was even getting plumper because of all the cooking she was doing for Silki. Now, she even fixed him a bag of food for him to take with him and eat later. One thing he never did, he never asked her for cash money. He had his plan.
On one of Corrine’s visits through the fence to see Luella, she asked her, “Has that Preacher Watchem paid you your mother’s money yet?”
“No mam, and I sure do need it.”
Corrine cleared her throat, “I reckon you do, feeding that young man like you do.”
“Well, I eat, too.”
“Yes, but you the only one payin for it.”
Luella smiled in spite of herself, “Well, he works round the house and yard.”
Corrine took a moment before she said, “It would cost you almost nothin to pay somebody to do what he does.”
“But . . . I like him, Aunty, I think I love him.”
“Why? How?”
Luella squirmed a bit in her chair. “Well . . . it’s just a feelin. I think he loves me too.”
“Why? How?”
“He’s nice to me.”
“Luella, sweetheart . . . you don’t know what nice is. Or what love is.” Luella turned her face away from her friend. Corrine continued anyway. “You know, Luella, people think you got money.”
“Wellll . . .”
“Well, you don’t. You got a little savings your mama and you worked for. It won’t last long. I’m not going to ask you how much you have left in that bank, but you be careful because it will be gone and something tells me Mr. Silki will be gone, too. And all the food and comforts you have spent your money on will have been flushed down the
toilet. You know what I mean? And you will have nothing to show for it except empty toilet paper wrappings. Even the doodoo will be gone.”
Luella hurried to answer, “Oh, no, no. I only spend what I make washing clothes. I started picking up my old customers again. And he don’t never ask me for no money, no way.”
Corrine shook her head sadly, “He don’t have to. He’s eating and sleeping all day. Free.”
Luella looked into Corrine’s face and she looked so pitiful to Corrine when she said, “But, Aunty, he’s talkin bout takin me off to a big city cause they don’t pay nothing in that factory here and his foreman don’t like him noway.”
“I guess not. They like people to come to work.”
Luella reached for Corrine, holding her hand out to her, looking so pitiful, begging to be able to believe her love had come. “I’m thinkin bout goin with him to see about it. I ain never been to no big city. Picture shows, big stores, pretty parks and things. I can even get a better kinda job.” She smiled a combination of sad and happy. “We gonna be married and buy a house up there. Just think, Aunty, I’ll have a husband. And a whole new life!”
Corrine felt like crying for her friend. “Oh, Luella, sweetheart, ask yourself a few things. You have a good life here. Someday some man will come along who will really love you. He’ll help you keep what you have and help you build on it. You are a nice-looking woman. You are plump, but you are built real nice. You are going to be loved for yourself.” Luella turned her face away again and Corrine knew she did not want to hear about some other day. She kept talking anyway.
“Luella, you talk about love. Let me tell you . . . You know all those plants in your yard? Your trees? Well, the seed came first, long, long before the leaf or the fruit. Learn a little about what it is to love. First the seed, then the soil, then the rain, then the sun, then the care, and even after all that, it still has to ripen so when you put it in your mouth to chew, the taste is not bitter, does not make you want to spit it out. Kindness, honesty, truth all go into making love. You don’t know the first thing about Silki after he leaves your yard. Have you been, ever, to his house? Has he ever handed you a dime and thanked you for doing what you do for him, by doing some of it for you? He could take you out to dinner.”
Luella hastened to say, “Oh, he don’t like that cafe food.”
Corrine hastened to say, “Well, let him take you and let you see if you like it! Instead of you always in that kitchen, no matter how hot or cold, cooking your food, bought with your money, cooked on your stove in your pots served on your plates which are later washed with your hands. What does he do for you?”
“He . . . loves me.”
Corrine didn’t want to hurt her friend, but the truth is the light. “I bet you if you don’t do any of all the things I just said to you, you givin him, I bet he won’t come back.”
Luella didn’t want to hurt Aunt Corrine. She wanted to tell her to get out of her house, but couldn’t, so she cried. Aunty took her into her arms. “Oh, baby, I didn’t mean to hurt you. But it’s some things you just have to think about. If Mr. Silki so sharp and smart and hot, what’s he doing in this little town? Why isn’t he in some big city already? Why you have to feed him? I bet he has to use your money to even get to the big city.”
Luella spoke into Aunty’s shoulder, she didn’t want to move from the warmth of Corrine’s love. “Married people do that.”
Aunt Corrine lost some more of her patience. “Fools do it too! And you are not married to him yet! All you got from him is talk! He gets good food and you even wash his clothes. He bathes in your tub and sleeps during the day. What he do at night, Luella? All night?”
Luella didn’t want to think about that. This was love walked into her dead and dreary life. LOVE, and she was going to hold on to it if it was the last thing she did! She straightened herself out of Aunty’s arms and made up her mind to go see that Preacher Watchem and get her money . . . before Silki decided to up and leave without her.
And that’s what she did . . . the next Sunday. She sat through the sermon and when church was out and Preacher Watchem was standing in the wide-open doorway, shaking hands with his parishioners, Luella was in line and when it came her turn, the crowd was still milling around.
Luella frowned and said, “Preacher Watchem, I have waited all these months for you to bring me my money my poor dead mother left with you for me. You promised her, and you promised me, my five hundred dollars! I need my money! I am all alone now. I’m washing clothes to live, just like my mother did. I need my money!”
Silence dropped on the crowd like fog and everybody turned to hear his answer.
Preacher Watchem sputtered and spit as he tried to find words to make everybody look some other place, but Luella stood her ground.
People mumbled, “Five hundred dollars?”
Other people, women said, “That chile sure is washing clothes for a livin!”
So they closed in around him, their beloved preacher, and he said, “I am truly sorry, daughter, the Lord’s work keep me so busy, I forget sometime. I will be there directly tomorrow.”
Luella didn’t move, said, “No, Preacher Watchem. I need my money today. Can’t wait no more. You said that three, four months ago. I waited for you every evening after I got through my hard work. Today, Preacher Watchem, today!”
Now, I will tell you something; it was her love of Silki and his needs that gave Luella such attitude and nerve. She might not have done that to the preacher if it was just for herself.
Preacher Watchem made a few quick a’hems and a’haws and said, “I’ll be there today, then, directly, daughter. You must forgive me for taking so long, but so many people in my flock need so much. I just didn’t—”
Luella interrupted him. “I’ll wait right here, Preacher Watchem. I won’t go home til you repay me what is mine.”
Wasn’t too much going on in that town anyway, so for some reason the whole congregation waited with her. Well, it was something new to talk about, “how that Luella talked to the preacher! that way! My, my, indeed.”
But . . . Preacher Watchem paid Luella that day.
Five hundred dollars seemed like a million dollars to Luella so she gave Corrine one hundred dollars to keep for her and put one hundred dollars in the bank. Then, Luella put the rest of the money away in her grandmother’s trunk. Her heart was full and ready to tell Silki they could get ready to go.
Part II
Silki’s life was at one of its lowest ebbs. He had lost his last $1.50. It was 9:30 P.M. on Friday night. It would be nine and a half hours before he could go to Luella’s. He had lost his job a week ago because he was never there anyway. His last woman had moved her new man in and put his own suitcase, not on the steps, but on the walkway by the gate near the street. He was ready to cry, but, instead, told himself, “I am a man and a man don’t cry.”
Mattie had been back several times to borrow money from Luella and the woman could beg so good, Luella had relented and loaned her neighbor some money. Five dollars, then ten dollars and once, when Mattie cried so hard about feeding her grandchildren, twenty dollars. So, now, it was a regular item on Mattie’s list to go over there once or twice a month to borrow whatever she could.
Mattie had, also, been at church when Luella spoke with Preacher Watchem and knew Luella had five hundred dollars. Five hundred dollars!! But she had had too many gins and beers the night before and had slept late on this day. She had stuck empty, sour milk bottles into the mouths of her grandchildren, three and four years old, so they would be quiet and let her sleep. “Shet your mouf up so Granny get to sleep one more minute.” Around eleven o’clock the four-year-old got up and went to see what he could find in the dirty kitchen on the greasy stove; the three-year-old followed him, leaving Granny in bed on the gray pillow, her mouth open dribbling saliva from the corner of her mouth.
The persistent sounds of pots falling, dishes breaking, finally woke Granny Mattie up. She was angry. She reached out a hand,
feeling for the babies in the bed and they were not there. “What the hell you basta’ds doin in there?!”
So, Mattie’s day had begun. She had intended to go over to Luella’s and get “a little money to feed these kids, they hungry!” She was hungry, too, and had left last night’s beans on the stove all night in the warm weather. “Sour! Ugh!” Mattie sat down a minute to get her thoughts together.
Silki had picked up his suitcase during the night, out of sight of prying eyes. He washed up in the cafe bathroom and smoothed out his clothes as best he could, put on his freshest shirt and made it on over to Luella’s house, carrying his cardboard suitcase in one hand, a large paper sack in the other hand and two cheap suits, on hangers, over his shoulder. “Hell, if she love me, she gon help me or I’m gonna leave her ass alone, too!”
You cannot imagine . . . the fear that flew out of his mind and the joy that flew in and took its place when Luella met him at the door, throwing her arms around his neck saying, sweetly, “Silki, my darlin. We can leave and go on way from here. Now! Preacher Watchem gave me my money! Five hundred dollars! We can get married!”
You already know Silki had never even seen, much less had, five hundred dollars at one time. Nor two hundred, not even one hundred dollars. The most money Silki had held at one time was seventy dollars, which he took to bed with him, clasping it to his chest and thinking all the night about how his future was changing, looking up, getting somewhere. At last! This, until he went out that night and lost it back to his world.
Now, Silki said, “Five hundred whole dollars?! Baby? Darlin!”
The plans for the trip rushed right on in.
First, Silki wanted to go down to the little town section and buy a few things for the trip on the way to pick up the tickets to some place he hadn’t decided on yet. “Baby, I . . . we need to pick up a few things for the trip! This gonna be the best thing you ever done. This place too small for the life I want to give you!”
The Future Has a Past Page 6
