“Yes, very.”
“And you really wanted to fuck me but didn’t.”
“That’s putting it rather bluntly—but, yes.”
“This is a first.” I crossed my arms over my chest, letting this information sink in. “If you like me, Mickey—then you have to start playing by my rules.”
“Your rules?”
“You have to start speaking my language.”
He rubbed his hands together and cracked his knuckles. “What language is that?”
“Sex!” Was I not being overly obvious here? “I lost my virginity when I was thirteen. To your cousin, Jack, by the way. Remember him?”
He grunted. “Jack was a jackass. I hated him.”
“Same here—but that didn’t stop me from doing it with him. I’ve actually never had a guy friend that was only a friend. I sell my body for sex every Tuesday. And I was trying to connect with you—in my way—and you turned me down.”
A growl tore from his lips. “If you’re trying to say everything you can in order to make me dislike you, it’s still not working.”
“That’s not what I’m saying at all. This is what I’m saying—”
I tugged at the bottom of his sweatshirt I wore, pulling it up over my head in one fluid motion. I flung the material to the floor. I had on underwear, but no bra. My chest was bare and fully exposed to him. Try to turn me down again, I thought. I dare you!
Mickey didn’t turn his gaze away, not this time. His eyes took me in, sweeping down my body slowly and then back up again. An unexpected shudder ran through me under his scrutiny. Mickey wasn’t like all the other losers I knew back in Pecan. He was different, so different it terrified me a little. I’d had all the confidence in the world a second ago, but standing in front of him nearly naked had me second guessing my boldness and had my heart racing.
“What do you want, Raven?” he asked softly as his eyes returned to mine. He hadn’t budged from where he stood, still several feet away.
“You.” Now my hands were trembling. “To touch me,” I added.
He sighed, shaking his head. I didn’t understand why this was so difficult for him to understand. A moment passed. Then another. Then finally he stepped closer, until there was only an inch or so between our bodies. Now that I’d given the green light, any other man might have roughly squeezed my tits, or hell, maybe gone straight for the gold and pushed me down on the couch to shove inside me. Not Mickey. He traced a single finger over the curve of my shoulder, down the length of one my arms.
His simple touch made me shiver.
“Like this?” he asked coyly.
“Yes,” I breathed, enjoying the fact that he was finally getting with the program.
“Or this?” He brushed his fingertips along my collar bone, then down, trailing his touch across the swell of my breasts and over one of my pebbled nipples.
He was completely toying with me. Now this was more like it.
He surprised me next by bending forward to kiss and taste one of my nipples. My heart drummed harder than expected. His mouth dragged across my skin, hot and sweet, and I swear it felt as if he were dragging his slick tongue across my clit at the same time.
Mickey knew how to play—and I loved it. My body especially loved it. A sudden desire for this man burned through me. From the roots of my hair to the tips of my toes and everywhere in between, I wanted him.
“You are so damn beautiful,” he stated as he cupped both my tits with both of his hands, continuing his assault of kisses.
I moaned and pushed into his touch. “Yeah?” I breathed.
“You know you are. I wanted you the moment I saw you.”
I didn’t fully believe him. I’d seen (and worn) his last girlfriend’s clothes. I didn’t need to see his ex in person—whoever she was—to know I had nothing on her. I was nowhere close to her level of class and beauty.
But Mickey wasn’t treating me like the trailer park girl that I was. He was showing me how kind, tender, and surprisingly sweet he could be.
But he took it too far when he moved to rest his hands on the sides of my face. He let out a low, guttural sound. His eyes, dilated and half-opened, so full of desire, fell on my lips. Time seemed to move in slow motion. He was going to kiss me. And my insides squirmed and grew conflicted. Part of me wanted to let him do whatever he wanted. Part of me longed to know what kissing this handsome man might feel like. But the other half of me said no—the half that needed to guard my heart. I could fuck Mick—I could have my fun with him all I wanted, but I couldn’t fall for him. I still hated him for leaving me. I still hated him for other reasons. I had my issues. So, hell no, he couldn’t kiss me.
That was crossing a big line.
As his lips came to meet mine, millimeters apart, I whispered, “no kissing.”
He paused. And pulled away.
His eyes weren’t quite as sweet as they stared at me, waiting on an explanation. “And why not?”
“Not my thing. I said I wanted to fuck you. I never said I wanted to kiss you. You have to earn that sort of privilege.” I sassed him, knowing full well setting this boundary might mean he’d leave me high and dry, topless and needy in his living room, and our night would be over.
He didn’t leave. But the fun light tone had ended. “You certainly like to push my buttons,” he commented. He grabbed at the edge of his t-shirt and yanked the material over his head.
Shit. Maybe I’d compared his looks to Superman, but Superman had nothing on this man’s body. He was all muscle, hard lines, and utter, sexy drool-worthy perfection.
He didn’t stop with only the shirt either. Next he pushed down his drawstring pants, shoving the material to the floor, exposing all of himself to me. His erection sprang free, fully hard, out there in the open, standing tall and proud.
Now. As far as men’s dicks go, I’d seen my fair share of shapes and sizes. Some cute. Some not so cute. I actually was pretty particular about what I liked and didn’t like. And Mickey was packing the perfect cock. Great length, nice girth, symmetrical with a bell-shaped head and a slight hook I couldn’t wait to feel scraping inside me. Damn, Mickey. Who knew? He might have had cookie cutter good looks. But he had a ‘one-in-a-million’ cock.
I swallowed hard, moving my eyes back to his gaze.
“Like what you see?” he asked.
Yes! Please fuck me now.
“It’s decent,” I lied, shrugging.
“I’ll show you decent.”
In a swift move he grabbed my waist and hoisted my body over his shoulder. Carrying me, he left the living room and moved for his office adjacent to the living room. He took my inside and locked the door behind us.
This was about to get good.
CHAPTER 10:
MICK
I had zero self-control. It was pathetic really. I caved fast and hard for Raven. And I was furious at myself for it, too. Furious at Raven’s super-human seduction powers. But mostly furious at Pecan for corrupting an innocent, perfect little girl. She’d lost her virginity to my cousin Jack at thirteen? What the hell. Only three years after the day my dad had rushed in and separated us. How could the world have changed my friend that much in only three short years? I’d always considered myself jaded—and I’d lost my virginity at seventeen, like a normal person. Raven took jaded to a whole new level.
But I saw her point.
If she only knew how to connect to someone through sex—then dammit, I was going to connect with her through sex. It felt like my only option at the moment.
A part inside of me screamed this wasn’t the way. The rest of me was lost in a delirious, erotic Raven sex-haze. Lost in the feel of her soft skin under my fingers. In the sweet way she tasted. In the little noises and moans she made when I touched her. She was extremely responsive. Every little touch seemed to bring a ripple of goosebumps across her creamy skin or illicit soft cries from her plump, perfect lips.
In my office, I had a desk and chair, some old text books from college
, and lots of old trophies and awards coating the walls. It wasn’t much. The only reason I’d brought her in here was for the locked door. Her daughter was upstairs, and I didn’t want her walking in on anything. So I’d brushed the contents of my desk straight onto the floor, and I’d laid her down across the hard mahogany wood surface.
I had her black underwear off in mere seconds, her legs pushed open, and my tongue on her clit before I ever had a chance to think this through. She tasted like she smelled—like vanilla, mixed with warmth and desire, and this feeling of familiarity I couldn’t quite place my finger on. Whatever it was, it was good and it felt almost right.
Almost.
I’d done this so many times before. Oral sex, that is. In fact, I kind of had a reputation for being damn good at it. So I fell into my usual ways, taking my time, gripping her thighs tight, lavishing her sweet spot in kisses and little licks, bringing her higher and higher, but not quite over the edge. All of it rather methodological.
“Mickey!” she cried out. “Yes! Please don’t stop. Just like that.”
My heart raced hard in my chest as my tongue slowed. The very day I’d moved to Maine was the day I’d started demanding everyone call me ‘Mick’ instead of ‘Mickey.’ Aside from feeling like Mickey was more a younger kid’s nickname, also a mouse’s name, I’d left the name behind when I’d left Pecan behind because I’d wanted a fresh start. A new persona for a new state. As I grew up, if any woman ever tried to call me it, I’d been quick and not so kind in correcting them. I’d told Raven not to call me it once—and yet she couldn’t seem to stop. In this moment, my birth name kept rolling off her tongue as she seemed to be nearing an orgasm. It was if she especially enjoyed saying it. And I almost liked the way it sounded when she said it.
Almost.
“Mickey,” she said again.
This time as the word hit my ears, my lips left her pussy.
I started kissing a trail along her inner thigh instead of where she was wet and waiting for me. Then I began kissing her across her belly and around her navel.
She shifted her weight up on her elbows and started at me. “What are you doing? I was almost there,” she said through ragged breaths. Her gorgeous eyes were heavy with desire. A trace of sweat had broken out across her forehead. Her black hair was all tousled. I couldn’t even begin to deny it—she looked so damn sexy staring at me.
And, yeah, I knew I’d stopped just short.
I’d done it on purpose.
I met her eyes, and didn’t answer her question. I only kept kissing her stomach.
Groaning, she brushed her hair out of her face and flopped back down against the wood desk in frustration.
My cock was hard enough to do serious damage. The blood in my body ragged. My skin tingled and burned for this woman. Tasting her, in the way I’d just gotten to taste her, was everything. Really, it was. This moment in time was almost perfection.
Almost.
Gripping the length of my cock in my right hand, I brought the head of my erection up against her pretty entrance. She moaned at the contact. Taking a deep breath—my throat so thick and rough, like it tended to do—I slid myself up and down her swollen pink flesh. She was wet and ready for me, and I easily glided against her.
“Yes,” she purred, moving her arms about her head. “Let’s do this already, Mickey.”
Hands down, my favorite part of sex was the initial entry. Well, that, and coming inside a women. Of course, every man on the planet loves to come. But the initial entry was such a great feeling, too. The anticipation, the race of my heart, the longing, the need, the want, getting to experience a new woman for the first time—all of those feelings building up to that one brief moment.
The buildup for Raven was different. Something was off.
My hands were trembling, and I couldn’t quite tell if they trembled from excitement or from something else. All the cells in my body wanted to fuck her and fuck her hard. There was want. There was need. And yet, there was something missing.
But shit, that didn’t stop me from thrusting inside her.
Emotion shook me to the core as pushed inside of her as deep as I could go. Standing while she laid on the desk gave me great leverage.
“Yes,” she cried out, her hands raking through her hair.
Wow, minimal effort on my part and she seemed to be having the time of her life. Like a kid on the best ever rollercoaster ride.
I pulled out and did it again. Then again and again.
But…
This wasn’t what I wanted.
The realization of it shook through me.
My body seemed to be on autopilot, but my heart and my head just weren’t into it. And it was Raven. Of all people in this world, Raven. Why was this happening to me?
I wanted to connect with her, and yet I’d never felt so disconnected in my life.
Raven seemed to be having the opposite experience. “Oh, hell yes,” she moaned, a shutter rocking over her body. “I lied, you have a glorious cock.” She adjusted her hips to meet my thrusts equally.
I kept going through the motions—pounding into her, giving her what she wanted. Meanwhile, I wanted so badly snap out of whatever strange, alien, crazy feeling had taken hold of me.
After a few minutes of the same, she sat up and wrapped an arm around my neck. With a smile on her lips, her eyes locked on mine, and her legs spread wide against me, she dipped her middle finger into the depths of her mouth, sucking softly, the sexiest image in the world, before she put her hand down between us and she began rubbing at her sweet spot. I should have done that for her, but I was too distracted to think at the moment.
My motions continued as she did her thing. I could tell she was close to getting off. Her breathing had changed. Her moans were growing louder. Her green eyes were almost savage. Despite myself, I was nearing my own completion, too. It couldn’t be helped.
And then something happened and everything changed.
She kissed me.
After she said wouldn’t.
After she said it wasn’t her thing.
“Mickey,” she whispered. She said my name as if she were an amnesia patient who’d suddenly regained their memory. She said it and her lips softly touched mine. “Mickey,” she whispered once more. I tentatively kissed her back, matching her same tenderness. I didn’t even care that we were fucking, I only cared about the kiss.
One kiss—that was all she gave me. One soft kiss with no tongue. Then her head fell back and she cried out.
I’d basically been asleep for the first ninety percent of this misguided love-making session, on autopilot, going through the motions, but holy shit was I wide awake now—fully experiencing Raven, fully interested and invested it the moment at hand.
I felt everything as an orgasm rocked through this beautiful woman. Absolutely mind-shattering as she cried out my name, clutching my neck tight, rolling her hips against me, as the tight walls inside of her squeezed me hard in wave after glorious wave.
I couldn’t hold out a second longer. I pushed into her one last wonderful time, going as deep as I could go, before I exploded inside her. All the while my mind replayed our one shared kiss. Somehow I knew that kiss had meant as much to her and it had meant to me.
The ecstasy of this moment was wildly incredible…like freefalling—so exhilarating, yet with an underlying fear that your parachute wouldn’t open and you’d crash to your death. I’d gone skydiving once before. The fear was half the fun. But the fear, even if it was paired with bliss, with Raven was quite debilitating.
Several heartbeats passed. We were both still now. The crescendo over. My chest rose and fell. Hers did the same. Neither of us spoke. Neither of us moved. I was still buried deep inside her and still very hard.
She broke the silence and spoke first. “By the way, there’s a giant dent in your car.”
“What?” I gasped, not even sure I’d heard her correctly. “The Corvette?”
“Yeah. It’s big.”
“I…um,” she breathed out. Her eyes met mine—so beautiful, so intense.
She still had an arm wrapped tight around my neck, sitting on the edge of the desk, and her thighs spread wide against me. My feet were still firmly on the floor.
“Pretty big,” she said through a raspy breath.
“How did it happen?”
“I came out of the library and someone had hit it while I’d been inside.”
“Are you telling me this now on purpose?”
“No.”
Shit. Yes, she was. It occurred to me then that the whole point of sex had been this. An ulterior motive. A distraction from the fact that she’d damaged my car. I didn’t even care about my car. But I sure as hell cared that she’d used sex as a way to make up for it. I wasn’t one of her clients. I never had any intention of becoming one, but I was pretty sure she’d just turned me into one.
There it was.
The pavement. And I didn’t have my parachute open.
I pulled out, stepping away from her, thoroughly pissed. “Goodnight, Raven,” I told her before she ever had a chance to answer my question.
CHAPTER 11:
RAVEN
It had been over two weeks since I slept with Mickey. He hadn’t spoken to me once since. I still wasn’t entirely sure what I’d done wrong. If it had been the dent in his car—men sure do love their cars—or if it had been the timing in telling him about the dent in his car. Or maybe the sex had been terrible for him, and I’d turned him off from me somehow. All I knew for sure was that he’d hurt me. After he’d specifically told me he wouldn’t. After I’d let myself begin to trust him—begin to fall for him, actually.
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